So here's the first part of Kurt and Danny's story. I'm a little nervous but hopefully you will like it.
I have to tell you one of my biggest secrets: Danny's not an OC and he isn't related to Kurt. The idea came from the movie Life as We Know It.
Thank you for the suggestions. I can promise you some Wes-David bromance. For Nick and Jeff I have something in my mind but that's a secret for now.
I'm always open to ideas, if there's something you want me to write into this story, just tell me.
Warning: mention if character deaths
And there's another cliffhanger at the end of this chapter. I have a weird hobby of collecting death wishes from the readers, so don't spare me.:)
7 years earlier
Nothing was the same. Kurt walked down the familiar corridors, hoping to recall his best memories from high school but it was so different this time.
'You know, it used to be that just straight ex-football players would lurk the halls of high schools after graduation, but you've proven that gay ex-show choir champs can also be depressive sad sacks desperately clinging to the past.'
Kurt stopped in front of his locker. Okay, it wasn't his locker anymore, it was somebody else's now. He didn't belong here anymore. He shouldn't have come back to Lima anymore. He should have stayed in New York and made his dreams come true.
'You can always come back.'
Kurt sighed and looked around sadly. Even his father had seemed disappointed when he had found Kurt at the front door the other day. He had screwed up everything and there was no chance to come back from the depth of the hole where he was in.
How had he ended up here? He had had everything he wanted. He had been in New York, he had prepared himself to get into NYADA, it was supposed to be the last station of his life. Oh, right. Life. The cruel little game he had played for more than 18 years.
Kurt walked to the office to finally see a familiar face. Mckinley had changed so much but there was still somebody who hopefully would help him get his life back from the million broken pieces.
"Kurt?"
Kurt forced himself to smile and stepped inside.
"Hey, Mr Schue" he said quietly.
"It's good to see you again" Mr Schue said and stood up to give him a hug. "How are you?"
His eyes started burning and he turned away, blinking hard. He wanted to say that he was fine but he was far from that.
"It's still hard" Kurt replied.
Mr Schue smiled sadly.
"Have you been at the cemetery?" Mr Schue asked.
Kurt shook his head. He wasn't ready for that.
"I understand" Mr Schue said.
"I'm staying in Lima for a while" Kurt said while he made sure not to look into Mr Schue's eyes. He couldn't bear to see more disappointment. He knew very well what he had done wrong. "I... I just... I need some time."
"That's completely understandable" Mr Schue said.
"No, it's not" Kurt replied. "I went through hell several times in my life but I never gave up. When my mother died... when my father had a heart attack, I was devastated but I didn't give up. I knew that I had to move on, that there was my whole life waiting for me but I don't feel the same this time."
"Only one thing is sure in life, Kurt, and it's death. But when people die so young, it's hard to accept, especially if you lose a family member" Mr Schue said.
"He was my brother" Kurt nodded. "Even if we weren't connected by blood."
"I know" Mr Schue said. "Give yourself time. Rest, think about your possibilities. And if you want to talk to someone, you can find me here."
Kurt nodded again. He wasn't ready to talk but it was good to know that he wasn't alone.
~ o ~
"What the hell have you done to this car?"
Mr Schue watched Burt Hummel go through his beloved, although quite old car. He new that he should have bought a new one but... but it was his first car. He loved it like a family member.
"Can you repair it?" Mr Schue asked.
"Hey, Dad" Kurt walked into the shop with a paper bag in his hands. "Hey, Mr Schue."
"Hey, Kurt" Mr Schue greeted him.
Kurt put the paper bag down and walked closer to them.
"You forgot your breakfast. Again" he told his father.
"I was in hurry but I knew you would notice it" Burt smiled.
"You have to take care of yourself, Dad" Kurt sighed. "You had a heart attack-"
"Three years ago" Burt pointed out.
Kurt sighed and shook his head.
"Can I help you with something?" he asked.
"Yeah. There's some paperwork waiting for you" Burt answered.
"Got it" Kurt said and turned to leave.
When he was gone, Mr Schue looked at Burt.
"Is he alright?" he asked.
"No" Burt answered. "He came back almost a month ago and he doesn't want to leave."
"He needs time" Mr Schue said.
"I know, but it's not good for him" Burt replied. "He spends most of his time here with me but doesn't talk. Damn, he doesn't even care that his clothes get dirty. Something's wrong with him and I don't know how to help him."
"He misses Finn" Mr Schue said.
"We all do" Burt nodded. "But my kid's about to destroy his life as well and I can't let him. He needs to go back to his own life and enjoy it. He doesn't belong here, you know that."
"I know. But what should we do?" Mr Schue asked in concern.
"We have to lead him back to his dreams" Burt said quietly. "But I have no idea how to do it."
"I do" Mr Schue smiled. "Would you tell Kurt to join the next glee rehearsal?"
"What do you have in your mind?" Burt asked.
"Glee" Mr Schue said. Burt still didn't understand. "Just make sure he comes tomorrow. I will deal with the rest."
"I hope you know what you're doing" Burt said. "I would do anything to see my son smile again."
"Just repair my car, it will be enough" Mr Schue said.
~ o ~
The next day, Burt practically forced Kurt into his car and drove him to the school. Kurt didn't want to go, not at all. The idea of joining a group where he didn't know most of the kids seemed scary. He wasn't ready for that. He wanted to hide in his father's shop and do some paperwork or anything else that didn't mean he had to meet people.
"Schue's waiting for you inside" Burt explained when they arrived. "I will stay here and make sure you don't run away."
"This is insane! I don't need help" Kurt said.
"You do" Burt replied. "Go."
Kurt rolled his eyes and got out of the car. He knew that his dad wouldn't leave him alone unless he talked to Mr Schue. He couldn't understand why they just didn't let him be. He was fine with working in his father's shop. He didn't have to worry or even think about his future and he did some of the job Finn used to do. It was the best for everybody.
"Oh, Kurt, you're here" Mr Schue smiled when Kurt stepped into the choir room.
Some of the faces were familiar but there were a lot of new kids he had only met once or twice. He gulped and took a step forward. After Finn's death, something had broken inside of him and he was scared people other than his family. That was the reason he had to give up his dreams about NYADA and move back home.
"Guys, this is Kurt Hummel, one of my best students" Mr Schue said and grabbed Kurt's arm, pulling him closer to the group. "And the new co-director of the New Directions."
"What?" Tina asked from the first row.
"What?" Kurt asked at the same time.
"I will explain later" Mr Schue whispered into his ears.
"But..."
Mr Schue stepped away from him, so Kurt didn't have a chance to continue.
"You all have great voices but that won't be enough for Nationals. You need to use your emotions and put them into the songs you sing. You have to show that no matter how good dancers and singers the others are, you are better, because you have all of your hearts in what you do. We're gonna show you what I mean. Artie, Tina, please join us" Mr Schue said.
Kurt was frozen in place. He had no idea what Mr Schue wanted but it couldn't be good.
The familiar song started and Kurt felt like he was going to be sick. It was one of Finn's favourites, the one they had sung several times. The one that had made them a team.
Once Mr Schue started singing, Kurt turned around and left. He didn't care what his dad would think, he wasn't ready for this.
"Kurt, wait!" Mr Schue called after him.
"I can't do this" Kurt said but continued his walk towards the parking lot. Maybe his father was still there. "I'm not ready."
"You are" Mr Schue disagreed.
"You have no idea what I'm getting through!"
They reached the parking lot and Burt was still there. When he saw how upset his son was, he got out of the car and walked to them.
"What's going on?" he asked.
"Why do you want to change my life? I'm fine this way" Kurt said angrily.
"No, you aren't" Burt said. "We can't let you destroy yourself."
"I'm fine" Kurt said quietly.
"You couldn't be farther from fine" Burt sighed. "You gave up your dreams and came back home to work in a freaking car shop. You're not like this, Kurt."
"Maybe I am" Kurt said. "Maybe I'm not talented enough."
"That's not true" Mr Schue said.
"What happened to Finn is aweful but our lives don't stop because he's gone" Burt said.
"What do you want from me?" Kurt asked.
"Help Schue with the glee club. Take as much time as you need to recover but then... I want you to apply to NYADA again" Burt said.
"Dad..."
"Kurt, I'm serious" Burt said. "I will kick you out of you don't accept Will's offer."
"You can't be serious!" Kurt gasped.
"I am" Burt said with much more confidence than he felt inside. "I won't assist you to destroy your life."
Kurt looked from his dad at Mr Schue. He was a few steps behind them and listened to the conversation quietly.
"I guess I don't have a choice" Kurt sighed.
"Meet me tomorrow in the choir room. We have to win Nationals" Mr Schue winked.
"Of course, Mr Schue" Kurt said.
"Call me Will" Mr Schue said. "We're colleagues now."
~ o ~
The months passed and Kurt started feeling better. The school year ended, New Directions won the next Nationals and the old glee club members graduated. Kurt was on the stage again, he practiced a lot in his free time and he came up with a lot of amazing ideas. But he still wasn't ready to move on.
He and Will became good friends. Will enjoyed that he had someone to practice with, he loved Kurt's ideas and they spent a lot of time in Will's house, talking about the future of the New Directions.
It was September again, a warm, sunny day when Kurt arrived at Will's house a little earlier than they had agreed. He knocked on the door but nobody came to open it. He heard soft sounds coming from the house and after a minute of hesitation, he opened the door for himself. It was Emma, Will's wife and she was crying. Kurt had to check on her to see if she was fine.
He found Emma in the living room, she was sitting on the couch with a white stick in her hands.
"Emma?"
Emma looked up at him with wide eyes and tried to hide the stick she had in her hands.
"I'm sorry" Kurt said hastily. "I didn't want to scare you but I heard you cry and... are you alright?"
Emma shook her head and cried harder.
"I have a bad day, that's all" Emma said.
"What's wrong?" Kurt asked and sat down beside Emma.
She was silent for a minute and Kurt thought that she wouldn't tell him but then she took a deep breath and raised the stick in her hand. Kurt wasn't an expert of women but even he could see that it was a negative pregnancy test.
"Oh" he said in surprise.
"Will and I are trying to have a baby" Emma admitted. "It's the sixth month and still nothing."
"Don't be sad" Kurt said. "Maybe in the next month."
He had no idea how bad Emma could feel. He was too young to even think about family and babies seemed like annoying little creatures for him that wouldn't stop crying and never slept.
"We aren't that young, you know?" Emma said. "We don't want the baby to be sick but if we can't manage to have one in the next few months, we will stop trying. Over 35, there's a bigger chance that the baby would have Down syndrome."
"What's wrong with Down syndrome?" Kurt frowned, thinking about Becky Jackson.
"It's not just that. It's at least 18 years to raise a child, and I didn't count the college years, the first job. They will need time to save money for an own house, find a wife or a husband, and I want to be there when it happens" Emma explained. "The biggest problem is that we can't be together in time. Will's always so busy and we can't catch the-"
"Can I help somehow?" Kurt interrupted her. He so didn't want to know what his friends did to have a baby.
"Well, if you could make glee club for a few weeks alone..."
"Got it" Kurt smiled. "Don't worry, it will be fine."
Luckily, Will arrived at this point, so Kurt was saved from the rest of the conversation.
~ o ~
A little over a month later, Will shared the news with Kurt: Emma was pregnant. Between getting ready for the competitions, Kurt helped them a lot with the nursery and baby clothes. It was good to have something new to make him busy, so Kurt didn't have to think about his own non-existing future. Even if he was still far from fine, his friends were happy.
After a difficult pregnancy, Emma gave birth two months earlier that expected. Daniel Finn Schuester was born in the end of April, on a cold, rainy day. It was May when he was finally able to leave the hospital and when the family got home, Kurt was invited to see the little boy.
"He's so beautiful" Kurt gasped when – after washing his hands twice – Emma handed him the baby boy.
Danny was so tiny, Kurt was afraid that he would break him. His hands were shaking slightly but Will sat down beside him and showed Kurt how to hold the baby in his arms. Danny was asleep and he looked like a little angel. He had fair skin like Emma and the curls of Will. He was a perfect little boy. When he woke up and looked up at Kurt, he could see his large brown eyes.
"He's so beautiful" Kurt said again.
"Perfect, right?" Will asked proudly.
"Well, he could sleep more but everything else is perfect" Emma said from her armchair. It had been almost two weeks since Danny's birth but she looked still sick and tired.
"Danny, this is Kurt" Will explained his newborn child.
"Your fairy godfather" Kurt smiled. "If they don't let you have something, tell me. I will spoil you."
Danny seemed to like the idea. He reached out towards Kurt's face and tried to touch him but he didn't succeed. His motions were still uncoordinated.
"Here" Kurt said and let Danny grab his finger. "Okay, I totally love him. If you need a babysitter, just call me. Even in the middle of the night. I can't wait to spend a lot of time with this little guy."
"Believe me, once you hear him cry, you will take it back" Emma said, making the others laugh.
Kurt looked down at the baby again. He couldn't imagine a situation where he would say 'no' to the opportunity to have this little boy in his arms.
~ o ~
The New Directions won the next Sectionals and Regionals as well, and to celebrate their success, Will threw a party for the glee club members in his house. His whole family was there, including Danny who was almost ten months old then, beautiful, clever and healthy. The only sign that he was a premature baby was his size. He could crawl rapidly and most of the times he was able to sit without help. And he was always happy.
"Hey" Kurt greeted Will when he opened the door for him. Kurt stepped inside and went straight to Danny. "Oh, my favourite little boy is here."
He wanted to hold the baby but Emma stepped between them.
"I'm gonna wash my hands first" Kurt said hastily and went to wash his hands. When he came back and Emma checked if his hands were clean, he kneeled down beside Danny and pulled him into a hug. "You're such a big boy now. Just a few months and you will dance with us on the stage."
"I hope so" Will said as he joined them. "He doesn't want to stand, so I don't know when it will happen."
"Patience" Kurt said. "You know how hard it was for him."
"Yeah. Thank God he's healthy. We could have had worse" Will sighed.
"Will, would you help me, please?" Emma called out from the kitchen.
"Coming" Will said and went to help his wife.
Kurt was left alone with Danny but he didn't mind. Since the boy had been able to play and move, Kurt really enjoyed spending his time with the baby. Danny was an amazing little boy and always made Kurt smile.
The evening passed quickly and the other guests left. Kurt stayed to help Will clean up the kitchen while Emma brought Danny back into the nursery.
"So the winter is almost over" Will said conversationally.
"Yeah" Kurt nodded. He had no idea what Will wanted with this.
"You should send your application to NYADA if you don't want to be late" Will continued.
Kurt turned towards the counter and took a deep breath. They had been through this a lot of times and Will still didn't want to accept that Kurt wouldn't go back to New York.
"I won't try again" Kurt said. "I'm happy here with you, guys. I don't want to waste my time for another application. It's pointless."
"No, it's not" Will said and put a hand on Kurt's shoulder. "It's been almost two years, Kurt. Don't get me wrong, it's been great to have you here but I think it's time for you to move on. You have dreams to come true, you can't waste any more time here."
Will disappeared in the living room and when he came back, he had a few papers in his hands.
"I filled them for you. You only have to sign them and wait for the answer. What do you think?" he asked.
Kurt looked down at the papers. Close enough for him to touch them, there were his dreams. Things he had wanted so badly once. But now that he looked down at the papers, he hesitated. He was afraid that he would fail again and he wouldn't be able to bear it.
"Thanks, but I won't try again. I don't have a chance to get in" Kurt said and walked out of the kitchen. He needed fresh air.
Will looked after him for a while and then turned back to the papers. He hesitated for a moment but then he grabbed a pencil and signed the papers for Kurt. No matter what Kurt thought, Will believed that he was a star like Rachel or Mercedes or any other former glee club member who could get out of Lima. Kurt could did it, too, and he was going to help him, even if Kurt didn't want him to.
~ o ~
It was just a few weeks before Danny's first birthday when Will called him to ask for a favour. He wanted to take Emma to see a play in the theatre and celebrate their wedding anniversary, so he asked Kurt to babysit Danny. Kurt agreed, of course. His friends deserved a night off.
When Kurt arrived at their house, the others were ready to go. Emma had a long list in her hands and pushed it into Kurt's hands.
"I've just feeded him, so he won't be hungry for a few hours. Bath time is at 7, right after dinner" she explained.
"Sing him Don't Stop Believin', kiss his forehead and leave him in his bed. He will fall asleep without help" Will continued.
"If anything goes wrong, call us immediately" Emma said.
"We will be back by ten" Will said.
"Don't worry, we will be fine" Kurt said and smiled at the baby boy in his hands. "Right, Danny?"
"Are you sure we can leave you two?" Emma asked in concern.
"Emma, Kurt's perfectly capable of taking care of Danny, don't worry" Will smiled.
"That's right" Kurt said. "You two enjoy your date."
"Thank you, Kurt" Will said.
He and Emma hugged Danny one last time and walked out of the house.
"Okay, Danny. What do you want to do?" Kurt asked the little boy.
Danny giggled and grabbed Kurt's shirt. He always enjoyed playtime with Kurt.
The evening passed smoothly, Kurt followed the orders Emma had written down for him, although he and Danny were so lost in playing with a weird talking dog that he put Danny into his bed almost an hour later than he was supposed to. The boy fell asleep immediately and Kurt went into the living room to watch some TV while waiting for his friends to come home. He doozed off at some point and woke up in the middle of the night for Danny's cry. He rubbed his tired eyes and walked into the boy's room. Danny was sitting in his crib and he seemed upset for some reason. Kurt pulled him into his arms and walked to the rocking chair. Within a minute, Danny was asleep again.
Kurt put down the baby and went back to the living room. It was past midnight and Will and Emma were still not home. Kurt frowned and grabbed his phone from the table. They were supposed to be home hours earlier.
Will didn't pick up his phone, so Kurt tried Emma next. He couldn't reach her either.
"Okay, this is weird" he muttered to himself and dialed Will's number again.
In the next few hours, he called his friends several times but they never picked up. Kurt was in full panic mode. Something must have happened and he had no idea what to do. Should he call the police? Or Emma's parents? He shook his head at the thought. Emma hadn't talked to her parents for years.
Danny woke up again and no matter what Kurt did, he didn't calm down. Kurt went through his list, desperately trying to find a solution to help Danny. Sadly, Emma didn't leave a note about what he should do with the crying baby in the middle of the night.
"Baby, calm down, It's alright" Kurt said but Danny just cried harder.
Kurt stood up with him and walked into the living room again. He called Will for the millionth time that night but all he could reach was the answering machine again.
"Will, it's me" Kurt said. "It's almost dawn and you're still not home. Please, pick up. I'm worried about you." Kurt stopped for a second to shush Danny. "Danny's awake and he's crying. I don't know what I should do. Should I feed him or change his diaper? Please, call me when you get this."
Since he didn't get an answer and Danny wouldn't stop crying, he changed his diaper and made him a bottle but it was useless. Danny wouldn't take any food and Kurt started getting desperate. He was worried sick and he still didn't know where the others were.
Two hours later, the home phone started ringing. Kurt frowned as he stepped closer and picked it up. It was still too early for a call unless... unless something was very wrong.
"Hello?"
"May I speak to Mr Kurt Hummel, please?"
It was an unfamiliar feminine voice and she knew that Kurt spent the night at Will's. She was quiet and calm. Too calm. Kurt squeezed the phone and tightened his arm around Danny.
"Yes, this is Kurt" he said, his voice shaking.
"Mr Hummel, there was an accident..."
Kurt didn't hear most of what the woman told him. Once the words 'accident' and 'died' reached him, within a sentence with Will and Emma's names, he dropped the phone and fell to his knees. Danny went completely silent in his arms and looked up at him with those large brown eyes of his. Kurt opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out. He felt hot tears running down his face and his whole body shaking.
Will and Emma were gone.
