The Ninth Problem
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.
Kai's eyes widened. "Kimi no gensho de sorera o kun, Kagami no Sagi-shi. (Swallow them in your illusions, Mirror's Imposter)" Yuusuke's lightsaber bright light dulled until it was the same colour of its surroundding. The very fabric of reality twisted like a vortex into the hilt, making everything that made sense into nonsense.
"Ka—i-kuu~n" an acidicly sweet sounding voice called. Demented sapphire blue eyes came into his delusional vision. Setsu's white hair curled around like snakes, coiling around everything.
Bloodcurdling screams followed, echoing and resounding like he was in an empty place, screwing around with his hearing. Swirling black abysses threathened to swallow his being whole. "Na na na na~" A voice sung, accompaning the screams terribly, like a broken music box, going higher and higher.
He held his head. A sharp pain was eating away at it He looked up, only to see that Ichigo, Variante and Setsu towering over him, the same demented look was on all of their faces, their mouths frozen in the same horrible wide grin that nearly ripped their face in two. Blood-red tears streamed from their eyes that were receeding to bottomless black pits."Dai~jyouu~buu?(are you okay?)"
Their bodies lolled around like string puppets. He felt his head exploding but returned to normal in a second, or maybe it didn't explode at all. The thoughts piling up in his head made it even harder to think. Kai sunk to his knees head in his hands, his messy bangs shading his eyes from view.
In the realm of reality though, Yuusuke was looking at his handiwork. "Weird, that's the first time someone didn't scream." His sword was still in the form of a lightsaber. Everyone else just stared. "Kagami no Sagi-shi creates illusions, driving people insane and sometime incapitating their minds altogether." He explained, a twisted smile forming on his lips as he caressed the blade. "Handy, when you don't want to fight, no?"
"Then why didn't you use it in the first place?" Setsu asked.
"Shut up! An invalid shouldn't talk." Yuusuke snapped.
"WHO THE HELL'S AN INVALID?" Setsu swore, opening her wound. "God damn it."
Riiiip the sound of ripping fabric alerted the arrancars that there was a person near them. He was a rather plain arrancar, with a rather plain set of hollow mask teeth lining his jaw. In fact his most prominent feature was that he was plain looking. But his name was another thing. It so happened to be Alfonso Bacctrucius Codwick Derofinne Edgardruce Four-hundred, as he was the four-hundredth to join the ranks of the arrancars. Well, everyone just called him ABC for short.
The other two were similar, like twins, both shared the same light blue eyes and light skin. One's hair was black and knee length and the other's was blonde and shoulder length. The one with the long hair had her nose in a thick black book. "Ne, ABC, what do you reckon that is?" the one with short hair asked, peering around the corner, not a caring about hiding herself.
"What are you doing! We're going to be found out!" ABC screamed in a whisper, clamping his hand over the girl's mouth. She shoved his hand away from her face. "Artemist-sama, tell her!"
"W-what?" The long haired arrancar pulled her nose out of her book. Her quiet voice stuttered slightly. "Um, Lisaris, you should listen to ABC.." her voice strayed with her attention back to her book. "..even if he's stupid." she added in a whisper as an after thought.
"Wh-what did you just say?" ABC asked pissed, shaking his fist at her, before remembering that they were supposed to shut up. Then he noticed that Lisaris was gone.
"Uwaah~! You're so cute!" Lisaris squealed as she held up Ruru with both her hands. Ruru stared at her, perplexed. A red-eyed, understuffed plushie which looked like it had been abused and thrown into a paper shredder was not everyone's idea of cute.
"Uhh, thanks?" Ruru asked.
"You can talk too! Arty, look how much Soul Society technology has evolved! The toys they make can talk!" Lisaris held Ruru in front of Art's face.
"Yes, yes.." Her voice trailed off waving away Ruru.
"Anyway, it looks like he has reiatsu." ABC said, but was ignored by the two.
"Yah~ Twirl twirl!" Lisaris twirled around with Ruru. "I'll name you Miranna~!"
"Hey, wait a sec, I have a na-" Lisaris swung him into a wall. "What the-"
"Miranna, Miranna!" Lisaris swung him around. Ruru was close to puking, as he had a weak congeastion. "La la la~"
"Hey! That's my Ruru!" Razbelle saw the brown teddy bear, her brown teddy bear from afar, being twirled around by a white clothed person. There was one thing she couldn't stand other than having no candy.
No one touched her Ruru.
Except for Rosette, because someone had to fix him. Back to the topic, the red haired child was enraged, disappearing from the balcony where she had found her sweets and candies. And that was a rare occurance. She appeared beside Lisaris positioned in a kick to her face. Just a second before impact, Lisaris held up Ruru in her stead, causing Razbelle to stop.
Using that instance of hesitation, Lisaris punched Razbelle right in the gut, not holding back. Razbelle flew through a wall. Lisaris smiled, her blue eyes uncaring, but her mouth was twisted in a cruel smile. "Finders keepers, Losers we-epers." she slid a finger down her face, mockingly.
Ruru was still dizzy, his vision a total mess.
"Lisaris-sama, you shouldn't have done that, she's just a kid," ABC said, earning a punch in the face.
"Not my problem," Lisaris flicked her hair. "You are just soo cute!" she hugged Ruru tight enough to crush his backbone, that is if he had one in the first place.
"Urk, what did you do to Raz..." he spat out.
"That's not cute." Lisaris's smile dropped into a frown immediately, "I don't like uncute toys." she took out a small sword and threw Ruru skywards, stabbing him and throwing him away unceremoniously with a flick of her wrist. "I feel like causing some random violence now, that toy made my mood bad." She glanced around, a huge stone table caught her attention. "I wonder what will happen if that lands on her." She asked, picking up the table with relative ease.
"Lisaris-sama you really shouldn't do that." but ABC didn't move to stop the homicidal girl as she walked over to the small, unconcious figure of Razbelle. Without another word, she slammed down the slab of stone, a satisfying splat of blood covered her white boots. Lisaris didn't even bother to see if Razbelle was dead or not.
"Let's go." She ordered, turning away from the mess, a look of annoyance on her face. Artemist and ABC followed without a sound.
"Oya, oya, I really hate getting into this form." said a voice behind them. It was the same husky voice that came from the bear. A white haired man stood where the stone slab had landed, a long gash on his right arm, in his other arm was Razbelle. A single streak of orange highlighted hair fell between his golden eyes. "Man, this little sister is such trouble." His well built body showed through the skin tight white shirt he was wearing.
"Who are you?" Lisaris demanded, she glared at the man.
"People usually introduce themselves first." Ruru said, leaving Razbelle to rest propped against a wall. "Anyway, you need not know. You just need to know that you hurt my lil' sis. This is retribution." He disappeared with shunpo, reappearing with a fist in Lisaris's gut, punching her straight through several walls and into a building. He appeared just as Lisaris's body was about to touch the building, positioning his leg in a kick.
A black book was forced between his leg and Lisaris, causing a resounding sound of a metal being kicked. Ruru retracted his leg, his gold eyes narrowed. That thing must at least weigh over a hundred kilos. "..I'm sorry, I can't let you hurt my sister also." Artemist said quietly.
"Me neither," Ruru said.
"Get out of here if you want to live." Artemist said.
"Quite frankly, I'm already dead, so are you." Ruru smirked. "No can do, if you continue to wreck havoc around here, Razbelle's gonna get hurt."
"Neither can I, Aizen-sama called us from the depths of Hueco Mundo. If not for him, she would have been devoured by the others, for that I owe him my life," Artemist lifted her dented book up, "Therefore, his word is my will. Oou, Cortina de la Noche (Cover, Curtain of the Night)." The black book glowed faintly as it changed form.
"Whatever you say." Ruru didn't wait, he doubled his speed and appeared behind Artemist. "Sorry." He drove his fist into her chest, the sound of bones breaking could be heard, he gently put her down. "I get what you mean, but still..."
He went to pick up Razbelle as ABC was currently being forgotten in the background. ABC moved ever so slowly, blending into the background. Of course it failed. He received a kick right in the face, the remaints of his hollow mask crumbling as he fell unconcious.
"OW, Goddamnit!" Grimmjow swore. "Can you for the love of *#$# be gentler!" A metal rod was stuck through his soul sleep. A lot of wires were linking him to monitors. You can already smell the chemicals boiling.
He was in Urahara's lab. Sun Sun was in a similar condition, but unlike bare-chested Grimmjow, she had a blanket to preserve her self dignity. "Tell me why we're here again?" Sun Sun asked.
"Ora, ora, Grimm-chan, if you keep squirming around I'll never get this done." Urahara shook his head. "Anyway, it seems you guys are going to be fine." He checked a few screens before pulling the wires away from their bodies. "You can feel Pantera, right?" Urahara asked writing down something on a clipboard.
"A bit, I guess," Grimmjow shrugged, pulling on his shihakusho. "Why?"
"Nothing much, I'm just making a survey. What about you Sun Sun?" Urahara turned to the female former-arrancar who had just started to slip into the shihakusho. She looked at him and pulled out a zanpakto. "Are you able to release it yet?" he jotted down something on the clipboard.
"No, and Anaconda doesn't respond. She's just..there." Sun Sun explained.
"I see, I see~" Urahara ripped off the paper and threw it into a waste basket. "Now, would it be asking to much for you to go get Halibel and Nel in here?"
"Yeah, it is asking too much." Grimmjow spat.
"Thank you!" Urahara shoved them out of his lab and slammed the door in their face.
"The hell.. then you shouldn't have asked!" Grimmjow gave the closed door the finger.
"I've nothing to do anyway." Sun Sun sighed and obediently went to get Halibel.
Mitsuki ignored the noise and the arrancars/shinigamis which were flying over her head after being hit by someone else. Quite frankly, she didn't give a damn even if the sky was falling, all that was on her mind was getting the stack of horrendously annoying paperwork to where ever it needed to be gotten to. "GWAAAAHHH!" She paused as a shinigami flew right past her, missing the paper work by an inch. Her hand reached out to snatch back the stray paperwork which had flew off and expertly smoothed them out on top of the stack.
Just then, a land mine went off, the explosion blew a flaming spark onto the paperwork. It set the paperwork aflame with unnatural speed, rendering it to ashes within the split second. One of Mitsuki's elegant eyebrows twitched. It wasn't a good sign. Not good at all.
Ulquiorra crashed through the wall to land in front of her, coughing. Blood flowed from his forehead. He got up, glancing at the sword in his pale hand shatter. He pulled out another one from the few swords that he had loaded into his sash. "Ulquiorra-kun!" Orihime rushed from the hole. A projectile following from behind her was block by her glowing gold shield.
She mended his wound with Souten Kisshun the moment she got to him. "Mitsuki-san!"
Mitsuki smiled at her, it was the kind of Unohana pissed-off smiles that had a sense of impending doom to it. Ulquiorra flinched abit, but Orihime didn't seem to notice. "Who's the one playing with fire..? Orihime-chan?" Mitsuki asked, her sweet, motherly voice barely concealed the underlying desire to rip the sorry person to pieces stuff him/her in a shredder, mince him/her, and blending the person's remains with acid in a blender before giving it to the dogs, and that would be considered an insult to the poor dogs who deserve better.
"Oh, it's them." Orihime pointed to the few arrancars that were dressing and acting like delinquets.
"Aaaaah?" the head delinquet-arrancar strolled up to Mitsuki, tilting his head to look at her down his nose. "Ooh, what a pretteh gal this is!" He used his hand to cup Mitsuki's chin. She smacked it away with the back of her hand, directing her smiled towards him. The Arrancar flinched but ragained his composure to glare at her. "Aaah? Who do you think you're messin' with, aah? I'm teh Great Ore-sama(loosely translated as me-sama), Anass Afadass!"
Mitsuki and Ulquiorra couldn't help but sweatdrop at his name. "I know you're an ass." Mitsuki smiled her homicidal smile. "By the way, was it you who set off that bomb?"
"Y-Yeah, of course it was! The Great Ore-sama's main attribute is fire!" He took out his sword. Man, this is getting too clichéd.
"Oh, great, a Pyromaniac. Now I know who destroyed my two hours of hard work." Mitsuki grinned, cracking her knuckles. "Taiga style, Ten Ryuu Chi Tora (Sky dragon earth tiger)" she whispered as her reiatsu flowed to her finger tips, which were out stretched like claws.
Ulquiorra covered Orihime's eyes with his hands as the pissed off vice-captain of the 14th dision ripped the sorry delinquet asses up. Even if Ulquiorra had seen Ichigo's hollow rip someone to pieces, this was still far scarier than whatever he had ever seen before.
Mitsuki was redefining the phrase "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" to the very letter.
Yuusuke sat back as he waited for Kai to show some sort of response to his illusions. In truth, it was actually gettting abit boring. Setsu was immobilised on the floor with Variante was fighting Ichigo's bankai which seemed to be destroying more things than his army had altogether.
The way he uses Bankai makes everyone's OC have Bankai. He thought. Wait, what an OC? Yuusuke rubbed his chin, his hot pink hair was falling into his eyes and making them itch like hell, but he stubbornly didn't want to use hair pins because it made him look even girlier than his hair colour already did.
Just then, the familiar shattering of glass alerted him. No way, "He broke the Illusion?" Yuusuke looked at Kai in alarm. Variante and Ichigo also stopped with their fight on a mutual agreement.
"...I really don't want to let him out." Kai said. His voice quiet. He slowly got up, his head tilted slightly, his bangs sweep away from his face, his blood red irises glared at Yuusuke in disdain. He held up his sheathed sword horizontally in front of him.
"You're doomed, really you are. What the hell did you show him in the illusions?" Setsu demanded.
"Uh..eh, there were things?" Yuusuke asked. "..meep?"
Kai stared impassively. He turned the sword so that the sheath would fall off when it was vertical. The sheath slipped off slowly, "Mosetu(Annihilate)," the bloodlust seemingly exploded from the naked part of the blade. "Enma Chigetsu(Flame Devil Blood Moon)" A person formed by the dull red bloodlust came to stand behind Kai, an expression of amusement on his face.
"Ne, how many centuries has it been since you last let me out, Little Kai?" His face was unnaturally pale white, long reddish black curls framed his face, he shared the same crimson iries but his left cornea was black instead of white. A long pale red scarf around his neck was connected to the hilt of Kai's sword. A round gold medallion with the same inscribings on the sword, hung by a red cord from it. "Ahh, let's see, 700 years ago was it?"
Yuusuke was paralyzed, so was everybody else, except for Setsu, who had more resistance to Enma's bloodlust. Ichigo was close to blacking out from the reiatsu. Enma appeared infront of Ichigo, his robes flowing behind him. He lifted Ichigo's chin and stared at the orange headed youth. "So he's the new Infinity, so weak," He laughed in a slightly mocking tone. "it reminds me of you a mellenia ago..." Enma abandoned Ichigo and floated around the rest, examining them.
"Anyway, Kai, shall we get started with the massacre?" Enma asked, a hint of excitement in his eyes. Kai said something unaudible to his zanpakto spirit, who sighed in slight disappointment. "Well, we can't have everything we want can we?" He shrugged, his sleeves went past his fingertips. "Too bad that there'll only be two bodies today."
Enma dissappeared. Yuusuke held up his lightsaber weakly, the sheer bloodlust of the completely unsheathed blade was overwhelming, he felt his breath hitch in his throat. A faint ching was heard again as Kai sheathed Enma, standing up straight behind Yuusuke and Variante. Blood splashed everywhere.
"..I really didn't want to let him out." Kai muttered as Ichigo fell unconcious, letting go of Zangetsu. ...How dare he make me grow bunny ears?
"Tch, what a useless clone." Someone said from the shadows of Hueco Mundo. "Variante, prepare for the new ones."
A dead monotone answered back, "Hai, Aizen-sama. What about the rest of the forces down there?"
"Leave them to die, we've collected enough information from them. Enhance the clones." Aizen stood into the faint moonlight. "And pray, Variante, that you do not mess up my clone's hair colour next time."
A/N: DUN DuN dUN! And that's a wrap for this chapter! But seriously, Yuusuke's hair is pink, just not eye bleedingly so.
Maybe I should make this into an Oc fic, Anybody intrested?
Reviews are appreciated! (seriously, I have no life *gets shot*)
Durarara is Epic! Heiwajima Shizuo FTW!
I don't think there's anything to add...i think
