Disclaimer: I do not own any Marvel or Thor Mythos characters. However, the plot is mine.
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BIRTHRIGHT
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Chapter Nine: The Great Divide
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ASGARD
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The Sacred Hall was in an uproar, shouts came from every corner. "Silence!" Odin ordered, slamming gungnir against the floor. Immediately, there was a widespread hush.
Once everyone quieted down, Thor took the opportunity to argue his point once more. "Midgard is under my protection. I must-"
"I said silence!" Odin yelled, "That includes you, Thor." He leveled his son with a stony eye. "Midgard will have to wait." He then looked to the rest in their company; several guards, the Princess of Vanaheim, the Warriors Three, Lady Sif, a few of his advisors, and most of his council. His Queen was busy helping their youngest get situated in his chambers. It had been several days since the news of Midgard had found its way to them, but they had not sent any sons in her defense—let alone their first son. "Our first concern is the threat to our own realm with the coming of Thanos. It is clear that his reach is far and wide. Having not only taken Crown Prince Vidar of Vanaheim, but also attacking a Prince of Asgard." There was a bit of murmuring at this. Odin held up a hand to calm them. "The necessary measures have been taken to assure the protection of Asgard and her people. As for the Mad Titan, further action will be discussed later when the peace council of the four realms meet." He meant, of course, the Aesir, Vanir, light elves and dwarves; as the Jotuns were no longer apart of the council, the dark elves were long gone, and the humans were ignorant. "As for now, you are all dismissed." Everyone began moving towards the exit. "Thor, Princess Ylva stay. I wish to have words with you."
Sif halted, wanting very much to be privy to the conversation that was to be had. But with a nod from Thor and a stern look from her king, she swiftly made her exit.
Odin waited until the doors had firmly shut behind the last person to exit before turning his attention to the young royals before him. "The fact that this attack on Midgard is happening so soon after the Chitauri event leads me to believe that this is no mere coincidence. I know that you wish to give aid to your human friends Thor, but we have more pressing matters to attend."
Thor did not like the sound of that. "More pressing than dealing with Thanos?" He asked, outraged.
"Do not be foolish Odinson. In dealing with Thanos, one should not march blindly into combat. Besides, whatever forces he has managed to send to Midgard, I am certain your friends can handle it." Ylva stated, agreeing so far with the direction Odin was heading.
Odin did not like the way the foreign princess reprimanded his son, and by the look that said son was giving her, he'd say that Thor shared his sentiment. However, she did have a point. "Yes. Considering their dealings with the Chitauri, I am confident they can hold their own. We must concern ourselves with Thanos's overall agenda. It concerns me, using Loki in the manner of which he did. Thanos isn't really known for his discretion. Why subterfuge?"
"Because he is a coward, Father. It is as simple as that." Thor declared.
"I believe it's time that Loki is transported to Vanaheim immediately. His body is healed. It is time to begin repairing his Seidr." Ylva told them. As it looked like they were hesitant, she pressed, "If Thanos is making moves, then it is imperative that Loki be strong enough to shield his mind. He is in a very delicate state, as I am sure you are well aware."
Odin stared at her sternly, before releasing a deep sigh. He knew she was right. He just couldn't help but feel that as soon as Vanaheim got their hands on Loki, he would lose his son a second time. "Yes. Loki needs to complete his healing. You may take him to Vanaheim. Thor, you will travel to Midgard."
Thor looked surprised by this. Yes, he wanted to help his friends, but… "Father, you were right. I trust that my friends can handle the situation for the time being. As of right now, I believe my place to be at my brother's side." The son told the father determinedly. "With him being so vulnerable, he'll need my protection."
"That's unnecessary Odin-king. Vanaheim is well adept to keep the prince safe." Ylva immediately protested, glaring at Thor. "To suggest otherwise is-"
Thor rolled his eyes. "I'm sure your people are able. But I am Thor." He finished, proudly. She looked at him in utter disbelief at his words, before disagreeing with everything he had said. And just like that, an argument broke out within the throne room.
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"I can do that. I'm not an invalid." Loki complained from his place beside the window. He was currently in his quarters, sitting upon the settee with a book resting snuggly in his hands. It was in this position Frigga found him as she personally brought him a tray of food. She was at the moment rearranging the nourishment upon his table, just the way that he liked it.
She smiled at the sound of his strong, albeit annoyed voice. "I am your mother Loki. Let me enjoy this simple act of tending to my child." Since her back was turned to him, she did not notice him tense at her words.
At that note, he swiftly closed his book with a sound thud and laid it upon his seat. He stood up and made his way nearer to the Allmother. He placed his hand on top of hers, preventing her from disturbing another object. She let go of the goblet, and pulled her hand firmly into his. Placing a kiss on the back of it, he smiled at her. "Please Mother, you need not tend to me so. I am a grown man." He insisted, gently. "And you are a queen. Such tasks are beneath you."
Frigga smiled at him. "There is nothing I love more than taking care of my family, Loki." She chuckled at him, before glancing over his shoulder. "I see you've taken up reading once more." She asked curious. "How disappointed Thor must have been when he came to retrieve you this morning." She noted with a hint of a laugh in her eyes.
Loki resisted the urge to roll his. "You'd think he'd tire of bothering me for a spar, when he knows as well as anyone that my studies take precedence." He released her hand and grabbed a piece of bread off of his tray. "He could stand to crack open a book once in a while," he commented, before eating the morsel he held within his grasps.
She raised a delicate brow at that. All too familiar with Loki's sentiment towards his brother. "I'd say you have much to learn from each other." She told him cryptically. Loki chose to ignore. Their mother always chose to see the best in Thor's shortcomings; in both of their shortcomings. There was a knock at the door. "You may enter." Frigga informed, as she noticed that Loki had a mouth full of bread. She ignored the look of despondence that crossed his face at her answering for him. They both waited as the newcomer entered. "Ah, Lady Sif, how good of you to visit." Frigga greeted.
Sif walked into the chamber, not sure what to expect. She had been surprised to hear a feminine voice allow her admittance, but she was pleased to see that it belonged to her queen. Not that she had been jealous of course. "Allmother." She greeted with a bow of her head. "I had come to see Loki. I do not wish to intrude. I can come at a later time."
"Nonsense." Frigga said immediately. She had no wish for Sif to leave. Not after noticing how Loki's eyes had darken upon her arrival. Clearly, these two had something about which to clear the air. "I fear I have overstayed my welcome as it is."
Loki started at that. "Mother, of course you have not-"
She gently hushed her son. "No, no Loki. A mother knows when her son has reached his limit." She smiled at him. "Besides, if I stay much longer, I fear I may resort to feeding you," she said glaring at his tray. "Do try and eat more than bread." She then turned her smile on Sif. "I leave my son in your capable hands." She said, and was soon out of the door.
It was quiet in the chamber for a while. Neither occupant breathing a word or making any sudden movements.
Flashback
"Do you love her?"
"Excuse me?" Loki asked, caught off guard by the question. He had been reading over some manuscripts for his father, when the she-warrior barged into his study as though she owned the place.
Sif stopped before his desk, looking at him. She had searched everywhere for him. His private chamber, the garden, the library… never did she think to find him here in a study he rarely ever used. "Do you love her?" She repeated.
His eyes instantly narrowed. "What business is it of yours?" He asked, harshly.
She knew that she had no right to ask him such a thing. Particularly him, a prince of Asgard. She had no right to barge into his private study. She had no right to anything, but she felt she deserved an explanation. "Sigyn. You've been parading her around everywhere. Particularly wherever I'm present. Is this your sick attempt to get back at me?" She asked, knowing that such a thing was not beneath him.
He gripped the manuscript in his hands tightly. "I'm going to give you the curtesy of pretending that you did not just ask me that." He eyed her down with no real emotion showing. "In fact, I'll even allow you to leave this place with your dignity intact, and we can both pretend this never happened. You may leave Sif," he told her, returning his gaze to the words before him.
"How odd that you would go for golden tresses? When it was you who turned mine into midnight. A color you once loved." She accused.
"The hair of a woman does not make the woman," he told her in a bored tone. "A lesson which you have yet to grasp." He finished, unsurprised.
Sif bristled at that, but refused to allow him to anger, to deviate her from the path she was on. "You haven't answered my question. Tell me the truth. Do. You. Love. Her?"
He calmly turned a page. "I needn't dignify such a query with a response."
"She's a toy then?" she said maliciously, doing her best to ignore the tightening of her chest. "Someone new to play with." She chuckled, "I should have known. As if you were capable of sharing anything real with anyone. You're nothing more than a soulless creature." She said disdainfully.
There was a loud snap as he closed the book and set it down on his desk. He slowly rose from his seat, staring her down with a very heated glare. "Have I not been indulgent? Have I not offered you the opportunity to leave with some self-respect? Really Sif, jealousy is not your best color." He smirked. "You want truth? I. Do. Not. Love. You." He watched as she flinched at each word. He was around his desk now; a mere arm's reach away from her. "Our time is done. You chose my brother. And I have chosen Sigyn." She opened her mouth to protest, but he held up a hand. "Out of respect for our friendship and our history, I have been very lenient with you. There is much that I will tolerate from you Sif, but speak of Sigyn out of turn again and you will see just how soulless I can be."
Tears slid down Sif's cheeks. "I don't believe you."
"Well believe this." He pulled a small object from his breast pocket. It was a small pouch of soft expensive rare material. He opened it and dumped the content into his palm. "I am asking her for her hand." He said as Sif stared at the sparkling object resting in his palm. "I've already received permission from Odin."
"No." She breathed, eyeing the beautiful ring despondently.
"It is done Sif."
"This is a trick." She said, mostly to herself.
Loki sighed. "It is not." He didn't understand why she was behaving this way. Why is she not with Thor? She would be queen one day, why does she need to have him as her play thing as well. Sif's heart broke, perhaps even more so than before. He hated to admit it, but it was almost painful to watch. Had he been wrong in his assumptions? No. He shook the thought away. It didn't matter anyway. That was a century ago. Still, perhaps he had been too harsh. With a sigh he decided to attempt damage control. "Sif, I-"
"No." She said simply, pushing the tears away. "You've said quite enough. I apologize for the intrusion." She told him, voice devoid of emotion with eyes as equally empty. "Congratulations on your engagement Loki." She said, before her eyes narrowed and filled with deep hate. "May it bring you great misery and pain." She then turned on her heels and left him.
To say he was surprised was an understatement. Her anger felt tangible, suffocating even. What was odder was the hurt he felt within his own chest. But he would not regret his decision. He knew it was the right one for both their sakes. Still, it left him with a distinct feeling of numbness. For though he may have gained a wife, he had just lost a friend. Possibly forever.
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Sif moved through the halls swiftly, her black robes flowing behind her. Black because she was in mourning. All of Asgard was in mourning. Such a tragedy. An entire village lost, heavily felt by the people. The highest family, in particular, was in a deep despair, one of which Sif had never seen the likes. Though, it was to be expected. Losing a family member was never easy. Losing children was unthinkable.
She reached the broad double doors and nearly halted in her steps. She should not be here. Her presence would not be desired. Still, she couldn't think of any other place she was meant to be. She gave a nod to the guard present, who stepped aside silently and permitted her to knock upon the door.
"Go away…" said a muffled voice from within. She shared a look with the guard, before slipping into the chamber and closing the doors behind her. All was quiet, at first; with the exception of her light footfalls against the hard marble of the floor.
"I said, get out…"
She stood in place, watching the hunched over dark form in the corner of the room. "Loki-"
"GET OUT!" he screamed, suddenly on his feet and headed towards her. Electrical green energy flickered about the room. He looked like a mad man. Clothes disheveled, hair pointing every which way, eyes sunken. He was a mess. He had cause to be.
"Loki," Sif started holding out a hand just in time to push against his chest, "please, calm down." She tried not to flinch at the look in his eyes. The raw pain he could not hide. Her heart clinched. "Oh Loki, I-"
"You shouldn't be here Sif." Loki said, voice cool, a startling contrast to everything else about him. The energy about them dissipated.
"Everyone's worried about you. I'm worried about you." She told him, eyeing a tray on his table, filled with uneaten—possibly spoiled—food. "You're not eating," she stated the obvious, moved from him and over to the table. "You need to eat Loki." She looked at him sternly.
Loki returned her gaze with empty ones. "You need to leave Sif."
She ignored the sharp stab of pain his reaction towards her caused. "You are unwell. You have lost a significant amount of weight," she pointed out. "Eir is also concerned at this point." Everyone was walking on eggshells around Loki, and for good reason. But someone needed to bring him back to the world. It could not be Odin or Frigga, for they were still healing as well. And Thor, well Thor chose to grieve with fighting. When there was not a battle to be fought, he could be found in the practice grounds, taking his frustrations out on his friends, guards, and anyone who would be foolish enough to challenge him. But Loki… Loki was a different story altogether. "Loki, you cannot stay holed up in here anymore. You're deteriorating. It's time that yo-"
"Are you happy? Is this not what you wanted?" he asked her unexpectedly.
She was surprised by his question. "What?"
"You were always jealous of her." He commented darkly, having not moved from his stance, but eyes piercing through her.
She narrowed her eyes at his words. "Don't you turn this around on me. This has nothing to do with-"
"Let's see, 'May it bring you misery and pain', I believe those were your exact words regarding our engagement," he repeated nastily. "I suppose dreams do come true."
Sif was mortified at what he said, at what she had once said. But she did not mean them, not in such a way. "You cannot think that I would find any joy in what has happened?" she asked him, praying he did not believe so little of her. "That I would wish this on you, on Sigyn?"
"Do. Not. Speak her name," he ordered dangerously.
This crevasse that has grown between them hurt Sif like nothing before. It was their past that brought her here, to help him, to comfort him. But it was also their past which prevented such a thing from being possible. "You know, we were friends once. Not enemies. Not lovers. Just friends," she said. "Yes, I was not happy when you announced your engagement. Even less so when you married," she admitted with a shaky voice. "But that was a century ago Loki, and I have since let go of you." His gaze softened but he said nothing, so she continued, "Though I had stopped loving the way I once did, I still care for you, for your happiness." She stepped closer to him. "I was glad for her because she made you happy. And when," here her voice cracked, "when it was announced that she was pregnant with your sons," tears filled her eyes and his, "I had never felt so much joy for you Loki. That you were to be a father." She noticed his shoulders beginning to shake, and laid a hand upon them. "I don't know your pain. I can't even begin to imagine it. But I am sorry," she implored, "I am so very sorry." Sobs slowly escaped her has he fell to his knees; she fell with him. She held him in her arms and they cried together.
It was quiet for a long while, with only the sound of their weeping indicating they were still there.
"I'm just so angry." He said finally. "She wasn't even supposed to be there."
"She loved Asgard Loki, as we all do. She would not turn a blind eye if someone needed her help. It was her duty." Sif tried to reason, but Loki wasn't having it.
He shook his head profusely, "No, Sif," he argued, "it was mine. Father instructed me to go and see about the well. They thought the water to be poisoned by magic. But I… I was selfish. Busy with my studies." He said hatefully. "Sigyn knew how much my research meant to me. She offered to go and investigate, her seidr being the second best in Asgard." He continued to shake.
Sif wanted to calm him. "Loki, don't. You don't have to talk about this now."
"She was pregnant Sif, and I let her go," he said, "It wasn't poison, it was disease. If I hadn't been so focused on my own agenda, I would have realized that sooner." Sobs wracked his body. "It's my fault Sif. I killed them. I killed my family!"
She continued to hold him in horror of what he admitted. To know that he believed such a thing broke her. To know that no amount of words disputing what he believed to be fact would change his mind hurt her heart. Knowing that Loki would carry this burden for the rest of his days, believing himself to be his family's murderer, frightened her. Such a weight could only lead him to darkness. She squeezed him tighter, afraid to let go. Because she knew that if Loki fell to darkness, she might as well fall with him.
She had no idea that after that day, after that moment, Loki would pull away from her; creating such a chasm that it would be a millennia before there were alone again. And when that happened, she would no longer recognize him.
End flashback.
"Do I not deserve a greeting Lady Sif?" Loki's smooth voice broke the silence, jarring Sif back to the present. When she did not speak right away, he added, "Are you planning to lurk within the shadows the entire time?"
She quickly regained her composure. "Hello Loki. How… how are you feeling?" She asked, choosing to ignore his second question. She did not understand, and was in no mood to try and decipher his meaning. His words always were full of layers.
He eyed her for a moment before deciding on his answer. "Like I've been turned inside out…" He looked away from her. "…exposed…" He admitted, though it tasted bitter as it glided off of his tongue.
Sif stood there unsure. She sensed that he was pulling away from her, as usual. "I'm sure after some rest you'll begin to feel better," she told him optimistically, not really knowing what else to say.
Silence found its way to them again. This time carrying with it a most awkward presence. However, Loki reached a point where he couldn't take it anymore. "Why are you here Sif?" He asked, wanting to cut to the chase.
"Why wouldn't I be?" She countered, mostly because she didn't know the answer herself.
He moved further away from her, choosing to stare out the window above his settee. "I don't know. Perhaps your aversion towards me would be enough of a deterrent."
She flinched at his words and was glad that he had his back turned to her. It was never good to reveal to Loki what one was thinking or feeling. "We were concerned about you and I thoug-"
"We?" He interrupted immediately, "should I presume you mean Thor?" He asked, facing her now. He smirked, though the mirth never reached his eyes. "Ever the diligent acolyte."
Sif furrowed her brows at that comment. "I was worried about you Loki." She insisted, not wishing for him to think that her motives were Thor-driven. "After learning about the shadow creature-"
"Aw yes, the shilombish," he remarked, her actions becoming clearer to him. "Nothing like a good possession to get a little notice around here." He said sardonically.
She did not enjoy the leer he sent her way. The animosity he had shown her. So similar to the looks during Thor's coronation. "Why are you being like this?" She asked suddenly.
Loki eyed her stoically, "Like what?" he asked. "What were you expecting from me?" He wanted to know. "What? Were you hoping the shilombish was the reason for me ending things with you?" He asked, making a guess as to what she really wanted. She was behaving in a way he had not seen since their days together. "I ended things because I didn't want to get stuck with you," he told her harshly. "To get stuck with someone so desperate for the golden boy's attention." That last part slipped. He didn't like admitting that his actions had anything to do with Thor.
Her eyes widened at that confession. "What do you mean?" She asked, confused.
"It's no secret that you love Thor." He pointed out, unimpressed by the look she gave him.
"Yes, I love him," she said, choosing her words carefully, "I made an oath to protect Thor, and he is my friend. But that does not mean that I am in love with him." She said, disbelieving that such a fact would be the reason he tossed her aside. He was the one that ruined them, not her. And to try and place the blame upon her shoulders? How dare he? "Your words are unnecessarily cruel." She said, her voice beginning to waver.
Loki made a tsking noise. "Why is it that when I lie, I am accused of treachery? But when I speak the truth, I am accused of cruelty." He shook his head. "It would appear that I am… what is the Midgardian expression? Oh yes, damned if I do and damned if I don't."
"You have always been cruel where I was concerned," she responded.
Her voice was small, causing Loki to remember himself. He did not wish to cause her distress. All he wished was that she never came here. "I assure you my lady, it was the other way around," he told her softly.
Sif would not have it. "You pushed me away Loki." She reminded, determination instilled within her.
He moved to her, stopping only once he was within arm's reach. He looked her in the eye. "I am not denying that Sif." He said, hesitant to continue, but continue he did. "I did not love you." He told her, watching the emotions—she no doubt thought hidden—flicker within her eyes. "I saw no reason to continue things." He finished matter-of-factly.
Sif squelched down the pain that arose within her. "You lie unconvincingly." She did not believe him.
He looked at her, certain his eyes carried no emotion. "You're reaching Sif." And she was. He meant it. He did not love her.
She could feel her eyes begin to burn, knowing that she should probably leave before she lost face. But her feet did not move. "You walk around wounded; playing the victim. That you are unloved." It would seem her lips had no such constraints. She stared upon his face as her words sunk in. She was pleased when his eyes narrowed. At least he's giving something away.
"My patience is waning thin." He threatened lowly. Why couldn't she just take the hint already?
She would not back down now. "You have the love of Frigga, Odin, Thor, and…" She nearly added her own name to that list, but thought better of it. "You have no excuse Loki."
"Are you quite finished?" He asked, when she finally paused long enough to catch a breath.
His voice was stern, harsh. His eyes, cold. She lost all hope that the Loki that returned would be her Loki. In truth, it was wishful thinking on her part. Of course their breakup had happened long before his dark passenger. Perhaps it was time to let go of a past that once was and a future that will never be. "Yes Loki, I think I am." She told him softly, before turning on her heel and leaving his sight.
Loki stood there watching her leave. He couldn't help the scowl that formed on his face. Sif was behaving strangely around him. Everyone was. Meaning secrets were being kept. He would make sure to keep his eyes open. Perhaps he had been too hasty in pushing Sif away. She could have provided him with much needed answers. He shrugged the thought away. There were always other paths to take to get what he wanted. In the meantime, he should try and enjoy is now cold meal.
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AN: I hope everyone enjoys the update. I know it's been awhile. If it's any consolation, the next chapter is already complete. Just thought I'd let this one soak a bit first. Please feel free to review with any thoughts or questions. The flashbacks had not been planned, but I think they fit in nicely. At least, now we got it out of the way, and everyone sees how Sigyn played into it; though she had originally not been part of the plan at all. Lol. I needed something tragic to have happened to them.
There's absolutely no way to get around Odin killing Loki's son, so I removed that option. This isn't a WE HATE ODIN fic, so that explains that. But of course Loki wouldn't be Loki if he didn't blame himself. I suppose to some it might seem odd that Odin does not want Sigyn and the unborn twins mentioned, but we all know that he doesn't have the best parenting skills and probably did it because he thought it would be easier for Loki. At least in my version. Plus they live for thousands of years, so perhaps it is a mourning process.
Also, SUPER DUPER SPECIAL THANKS TO MY REVIEWERS:
VICTORIA SAINT: Thanks for sticking with my story and re-reading it lol. Is this a Sifki fic? Good question. There's definitely a Sifki past, but I can't say whether there is a Sifki future. Only time will tell. Thanks for reviewing.
PALLYNDROME: There's more to the explanation coming. I left it purposefully vague because they don't know just how he was affected. It would also depend on how long it was in him. But basically, it influences a lot and is able to take complete control but only in certain circumstances. Now that Loki is awake, they will begin to get answers. Sorry, it'll all make sense. I promise. Thanks for your review.
THEPHOENIXAN: Yeah, Loki at this point cannot stay in Asgard. As far as what he wants, if they can mend broken fences he may be willing to return. But in truth, I may be ready to let go of that part of his life. We'll see. Thanks for reviewing.
ANASTACIANOTT: You're absolutely right about Mom and Pops. They are in a difficult position. They were neglectful, even Frigga. But Loki is an adult now and it's very hard to fix an upbringing like that. He may eventually forgive them, but their relationship really will never be the same again. Making Thor and Sif a little moronic is fun and easy lol. But hopefully they'll get to grow in this story. They're not dumb, just sadly ignorant. I'm trying to use flashbacks to explain Loki and Sif's odd relationship. They are alive for so many years that I feel a lot could have happened. Plus, in the film, the way she would look at him… even if it was hate… emotion like that comes from somewhere. Not because she thinks he's jealous of his brother. No, that's a personal look. And I don't think it's because of her hair either. If they really wanted to, they could explore a deeper relationship with the two in the films. Not necessarily with them coming together, but with them having been together in the past as lovers or simply best friends. They have more in common with each other than either does with Thor. Ylva/Loki… it's coming. Thanks for your insightful review.
JUSTIN: Big YOU'RE WELCOME and THANK YOU for your review.
KEKEH: Lol, thank you. Glad you found my story. Jane's not gone forever, just gotta wait til they get to Midgard. Thanks for reviewing.
DGTNSL: Thanks for reviewing. Loki's treatment isn't over, hopefully it will be soon though. Things are definitely about to get interesting with Thor and Sif. And Ylva and Loki will have an interesting meet.
Thanks again everyone.
Be on the lookout for another update soon. Loki / Odin confrontation NEXT!
And AS ALWAYS… … … … … … … … PLEASE REVIEW!
