A/N okay I'm keeping this part short so you can go right to the story. I asked about the reviews because I mostly think that people who review, have read all the way to the end of the chapter. Though I know there are people who never really review. I am guilty of that sometimes. Anyways. I'm glad to see that the last chapters were good, regardless Now, on to the story.

Disclaimer. I don't own Kenshin.


Chapter 8

Kaoru wheezed for air. Her sides heaved so hard they ached. Tears formed in her eyes from the pain but she refused to show weakness. Her bokuto was on the ground a few feet away from her, useless now for Kenshin stood between it and her. The wood was heavily notched, it was all but ruined. Slight bruises were already showing up on her exposed shoulder where her gi had fallen lose and her arms and wrists showed many more of the dark discolorations. Yet they didn't hurt as much as she knew they should have.

Kaoru had fallen back, landing hard on her bottom and there she sat, gasping for air. Sweat trailed down the sides of her face and caused her gi to stick uncomfortably to her back. Kenshin stood, sword point to the ground, looking none the worse for wear. His breathing was only slightly accelerated and his yellow eyes gleamed brightly from the thrill of the fight.

He was a demon. A god... Who could move so fast and hardly break a sweat? It took all Kaoru had to keep up with him.

"Good, but not great." Kenshin relaxed his stance.

"Unfair!" Kaoru cried. Her teacher raised a delicate eyebrow in question and she continued. "You had a real sword! I had to worry about getting hit and you didn't!" She snapped her mouth shut as a growl came from Kenshin. She knew that growl from years of his teaching.

"You should always worry about being wounded, Child. Not all fights will be with a wooden sword." He stated calmly. "However, you never have to worry about me harming you Kaoru." He held his katana further out for Kaoru to examine. It looked like a normal sword except for one thing.

"The blade is on the wrong side of the sword!" Even if he had hit her with his sword, which; Kaoru expected he did with the pains on her body; he wouldn't have done more than bruised her.

"This is a Sakabatou. A reversed blade sword."

"Why would you carry such a sword?" Kaoru reached out and ran her thumb lightly across the top to be sure it was a blade. It was. Kenshin sheathed his sword then took it from his belt and kneeled down. Kaoru scrambled from her unflattering position on the mat and kneeled as well.

"Two reasons." He set the sword between them. "I've practice sword fighting for so long... hours upon hours every day of my life that it became second nature to me. It was easy to slaughter people."

Kaoru knew her mouth had dropped open but couldn't shut it. Her sensei, this man? Was a killer?

"Did you fight in the war?"

Kenshin shrugged his shoulders slightly "I went above ground when I was needed. I did fight for the government. Secretly, of course. But it wasn't just other warriors and samurai that I killed. I started killing those who displeased me or wronged me in any way. Even that pig Fukija felt my blade years ago. I have mastered the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu. Causing death was easy." He swallowed. Kenshin suddenly felt like his body was on fire. He never spoke so much out loud in his life. And never had he ever spilled such information about himself. He didn't even know why he was risking it.

'This is dangerous you fool'

"Is th-that why you sometimes missed my training classes?" Kaoru pressed gently, wanting to learn all she could about her strange teacher. "You were off fighting?"

Kenshin nodded and continued, though his voice dropped and each word was forced. "I switched to the Sakabatou so I would have to think clearly enough to flip the sword around before killing. Not act on pure rage and instinct." He paused for a moment, looking down at the sword. His shoulders relaxed a little. "The second reason was, I knew one day I would have to teach you one on one. I knew this day would come when you could no longer advance with just my voice to teach you. The Hiten Mitsurugi will advance your skills, it is something you must learn, at it is most impossible unless face to face. And if I had ever harmed you, Child…" he let his voice trail off.

Kaoru sat in a stunned silence. "How many people do you think you killed?" She knew it was the wrong question to ask by the way he set his jaw tightly and the narrowing of his eyes. But she pressed it, now that she had asked. "Fifty?...seventy?"

"I lost count long ago on how many lives I ended, not just in Japan, but in all my travels. But I do know that during the war, in a span of six months….I killed over one hundred people. They called me Hitokiri Battousai... called me the Manslayer. " His hands gripped his hakama into his fists.

One hundred people? Kaoru couldn't fathom one man causing that much death. Suddenly she saw her Sensei in a new light, and it wasn't a pleasant one. This man… her teacher… was a killer. He didn't just kill in the war, he killed others too. "Do you still kill people?" She choked out.

Kenshin knew he was already on thin ice.

'Don't answer her!'

But he couldn't lie. He looked away to keep from watching her eyes. "Sometimes. But they all deserved worse than death" he added quickly. When he heard her gasp, he wheeled his gaze back around, eyes flashing dark amber for a moment. "They were all horrible people. Scum. The world was far better off without them!" Why the Hell was he defending himself to this child? She shouldn't judge him. They all had judged him. No one had the right to judge him, least of all Kaoru.

The urge to shake her returned. Of all the people he wanted to understand him, and already she was looking at him in that fearful way. The way all his victims had looked at him. His hands clenched into fists, nails digging into his palms. He had to control himself. Scaring Kaoru was the last thing he wanted to do. But her eyes…those ordinary blue eyes that seemed so extraordinary now that they gazed upon him; he couldn't stand having such eyes look at him in such a way.

He had to stop it…

'Make her look away'

He snapped.

Kaoru jumped as he leaned forward and slammed his hand on the floor between them. The sword bounced slightly from the impact.

"Don't you look at me like that Kamiya Kaoru!" Kenshins' face pulled into an almost savage look; his eyes narrowed and glittered dangerously. Golden Amber flooded them, chasing away the yellow that they were before.

"L-Like what?" Kaoru stammered, eyes wide in surprise and fear.

"Have I not taught you over these past years! Taken you under my wing and trained you to become what you so desperately wanted?" Kenshins' whole body shook with rage. "And yet you betray me with your eyes! You judge me as I sit before you! When you are just the same as I am!"

Kaoru tipped her head up "I'm nothing like you Sensei. It is one thing to kill in a war, it is another to kill in cold blood."

Kenshin roared and before Kaoru could blink He had lunged the distance between them, grabbing Kaoru by the throat sending them both to land hard on the dojo floor. Kaoru struggled to get free from under him but he's grip on her was like iron. Kenshin held tight and leaned down till their noses almost touched. His eyes burned like fire. Anger rolled off of him, suffocating Kaoru.

"You think you are nothing like me child. You are wrong! You have it in you too. I see it in the passion you have when you train, the gleam in your eyes when you spar with others. You like the power… love the control."

"No." Kaoru cried weakly, no longer fighting him. She only gripped tightly to the wrist of the hand around her throat, pinning her to the ground. Kenshin didn't let up; he was already too far gone. His voice was no more than a growl, anger clipping his words.

"The way you watch the fights when you were a young child. I was there, I watched you every time." He went on ruthlessly. "Watching the dance of death. It captivated you." He leaned further down and Kaorus' pleading eyes grew even larger as he whispered softly in her ear "You are just like me."

"Kenshin!" Kaoru whimpered out. Not knowing what else to do. She felt him freeze and start to tremble. Then suddenly his weight was off her. Stunned, Kaoru lay there for a moment before sitting up. She watched with terrified eyes as her beloved Sensei flew into a fit of rage, the likes she had never seen before.

Oaths and curses flowed like a second language from Kenshin. He tore at his mane of red hair, ripping out the tie that held his hair in a pony tail. His now free hair fanned out to frame his face and shoulders. He looked like a lion as he stalked about the area. Knick-knacks and objects flew, scattering across the small dojo floor, some landing in the pool. Something flew over Kaorus' head and the mirror behind her shattered. Cries of rage echoed in the cave. Kaoru had to fight to keep from clamping her hands over her ears.

Kenshin finally calmed enough that he squatted down on a rock near the pool. He held his head in his hands. Kaoru climbed to her feet, her legs barely having enough strength to hold her. She was stunned. Utterly confused. She hadn't judged him, did she? He demanded she not look at him in that way… perhaps she had it on her face. She lifted a hand and set it on her cheek. She had hurt her teacher. And for that, she was ashamed. Slowly she stepped over the mess and stood next to him. He ignored her.

"Kenshin, I…. I'm sorry." She placed a hand on his shoulder and slowly turned him to face her. He turned slightly, watching her through the mess of hair that always obscured his face. He still trembled; even more so when she put her hands on him and spoke. He tried to turn away again but she stopped him. "Forgive me. If I judged you, I didn't mean it." She lifted her hand to trail down his mane of hair. His eyes closed and he relaxed slightly. She continued to pet his hair. She was unable to stop herself from pulling away his bangs to tuck it behind his ear.

Good lord

A scar. Beneath that mask of hair was a massive X shaped scar that covered his whole cheek. How had she not seen it before? At her gasp Kenshins' glowing eyes snapped open and he lashed out.

Kenshin watched almost in slow motion as Kaoru stumbled before falling onto the ground. His hand stung for some reason and he didn't dare wonder why. He was out of control, he knew it.

'You're going to kill her.'

She had pushed him. She was doing this to him. He needed to get away from her. With a growl, he jumped from the rock, stepped over Kaoru as she tried to sit up, snatched his sword from the ground, and in a blur, dashed over the pool and into darkness.

Kaoru, too stunned to feel any pain, sat up and watched the red blur vanish. A hand shaped welt immediately let itself be known on her pale face. Relief washed over her again. The air didn't seem as thick. Once again it was easy to breathe now that he was gone. Kaoru, in a daze, looked about at the mess around her before catching site of herself in a mirror. Her hair had fallen lose of its ponytail and half hung wild around her face. A hand print stood out in start contrast on her face, she was pale, and shaking. Tears stained her face. Suddenly overcome, Kaoru rested back on the ground and wept in both fear and relief.


A/n gah! Don't hurt me! It's not that big of a cliffie. Kenshin isn't mean, I promise. He's just very confused right now. Poor Kaoru though.. aye. Anyways. Can't wait for reviews. Thanks for reading. :)