This one is longer then the other chapters, I think. It seems like it is.

And I'm pretty sure you guys will like me for the ending of this chapter. I think this story has maybe one or two more chapters to go before it's completed.

Warnings: bad grammar, bad spelling... mushiness.

Disclaimer: Do you see any of this happening in Gravitation? No? Then that's your answer.

GRAVITATION

Gaining A Shine

GRAVITATION

Before Tohma could finish opening the door, a blurry pink object flew past his head and promptly smacked Tatsuha on the side of his face. The young man palmed the area where the thing connected before moving his gaze to the object in his lap. Beady black eyes stared back at him and Tatsuha held back a choked gasp. Slowly, he raised the object up and held it in front of him. "Hi, Kuma," Tatsuha whispered, a small smile forming. Tatsuha sighed before squeezing the stuffed bunny to him in a hug, "I missed you."

His Father grimaced slightly at the display in front of him, "Tatsuha, son, you have more company then the rabbit."

Tatsuha briefly gazed at the door, "It's a bunny, Father."

The older man blinked, "What?"

"Kuma is a bunny, not a rabbit."

"Bunny is just a cute word for rabbit, Tatsuha."

The youngest nodded, "I know. But Kuma likes to be called a bunny. He says it makes him feel special."

His Father still held a confused look in his gaze. "Alright then." Maybe Screwy has affected him more then we thought if he pretends to talk to stuffed animals.

Tohma coughed and the two Uesugi's turned their attention to him. Normally the keyboardist wouldn't mind the gazes on him, but at the moment, he felt a little uncomfortable for disturbing their speaking. "Mika and Eiri are waiting to speak with you."

Tatsuha held Kuma tighter to his chest. In the midst of having the bunny in his arms again and the conversation about him, Tatsuha had forgotten why Tohma had visited. He took a few deep breaths before nodding his consent. It's now or never, his mind supplied. You have to face the consequences of not telling them. You're the only one to blame.

No. Tatsuha shook his head, There is no blame. If anyone were to have it, then it would be Screwy. Blame him.

A warm hand clasped his shoulder and Tatsuha jerked, eyes raising to meet his brother's gold ones. At first glance, normally he wouldn't be able to tell the types of emotions flashing through his brother's eyes but now, if he looked hard enough, he could see clearly. Sadness. Regret. Anger? Tatsuha tilted his head, silently asking why his brother was feeling anger.

Eiri simply shook his head and sat on the chair next to Tatsuha's bed. His fingers itched to grab the cigarette box in his right pants pocket, but he clobbered the feeling instantly. He was in a hospital where no smoking was allowed. Besides, he was sure Tatsuha hadn't smoked in at least seven months.

"Are we just going to stay quiet?"

"Maybe."

Mika laughed, "Hm. Just like you two to convey everything you want to say without talking. Well, unlike you I can't seem to figure out what you're both thinking, so if you don't mind, say it aloud."

Tatsuha rubbed the back of his neck, sourly missing the strands of hair that use to reside there. "Ah, sorry, Mika."

"Hn."

Mika moved towards the bed and sat next at the foot, "Were you ever going to tell us?"

He didn't say anything.

Eiri snorted, "That's what we thought."

"I wanted to but I just didn't know how."

"Hm? You could have, oh I don't know, called us. Come for a visit. You had options."

The parental tone Eiri's voice sparked guilt in Tatsuha. He blinked back wetness and settled for sighing slowly, "I know. Since I found out, I've wanted to tell you. Each day I told myself the different ways I could break the news and each way just didn't feel right."

"So you settled on not saying anything?"

Tatsuha nodded, "I know you don't under..."

"Damn right I don't understand!" Mika stood, hands automatically going to her waist. "We're family, Tatsuha. Family. You're Uesugi Tatsuha. He's Uesugi Eiri. I'm Uesugi Mika. Yes, Eiri's and mine's name have changed a bit, but that's no reason not to tell your family!"

"She's right." Eiri rubbed his forehead, his face taking on a pained expression. "Mother told us. You should have too."

"Right," Tatsuha started and briefly wondered if he should continue with his opinion. "Like you did with Yuki."

"Tatsuha..." Mika began before getting cut off.

"No! I should have told you guys, right? Well, why didn't he tell me about that? Didn't I have a right to know?"

"It's not the same!"

"Yes it is! We're family! Family tells each other everything." The youngest sibling rolled his eyes, "Apparently we're not the closet family."

Eiri closed his eyes, "You're just now figuring that out?"

Mika huffed, crossing her arms over her maroon blouse, "Honestly! Why do I put up with you two?"

"Because," Tatusha smiled, "You love us."

Mika ran a hand through her hair, "Yes, that has to be it. Right, Eiri?" She sent a wink to Tatsuha who chuckled.

Eiri opened his eyes a bit, squinting at the two, "I suppose," he stated before closing his eyes again.

"Are you alright, Bro?"

The blonde man stiffled a snort, "You're the one in the hospital and you're asking me if I'm okay?"

"Uh, yeah?"

Eiri laughed silently, opening his eyes to smile warmly at his little brother, "You make me mushy."

"I thought that was Shindou's job?"

Tatsuha laughed, "Ah, I hope we never change!"

GRAVITATION

"Do you need anything, Tatsuha?"

"No, Shu..."

"A new pillow? Blankets? Food? Ice cubes? A better T.V.? How about something to drink? I know this great place that serves wonderful mochas! Isn't that your favorite coffee flavor? Mocha? Hm! Or was it french vanilla?"

Tatsuha rolled his eyes before sighing back into pillows behind him, "I don't need anything Shu. But if you want, you could get me a mocha cappucino." Tatsuha winked at the young singer who grinned.

"You got it, Tatsuha!"

He watched as the pink-haired man ran out of his room and chuckled when a nurse yelled at him to stop running in the halls. "Ah, that Shuichi. He's so..."

"Crazy?"

Tatsuha closed his eyes for a moment, letting his mind take him back to the past where that voice was heard for many days. The slight boyish tone with a touch of deepness from hitting puberty. If he imagined long enough, Tatsuha knew he could picture the owner of the voice without missing a single detail. But then again, he wondered, why picture it when I can have the real thing? Taking a deep breath, Tatsuha opened his dark brown eyes to meet cobalt blue. Instantly he was taken down memory lane again, seeing glances of those eyes showing numerous emotions. Tatsuha coached himself out of the memories and a voice told him to say something.

"Hi."

Tatsuha cursed himself for sounding like an idiot. Damn it!

Ryuichi simply giggled, "After so long that's all you say?"

"Ah, yes."

The older singer shook his head in amusement, "You're so funny, Tats."

A small smile came to Tatsuha's face, "Thank you."

Out of meeting everyone again today, this was the one person Tatsuha was most nervous about seeing. He knew once they laid eyes on the other, everything would be awkward. And by the tense silent they now sat in, Tatsuha couldn't help but kick himself mentally for cursing his luck. He thought for a minute if things could ever go back to the way they were.

Of course not, the voice spoke again. Tatsuha wondered if Screwy somehow gained the ability to talk so the disease could torment him. Things won't go back like they were. You don't have that kind of time. Remember, Tatsuha?

"How are you?"

Tatsuha blinked out of his thoughts and turned his attention back to Ryuichi, "Um... alright, I guess."

"There isn't any pain?"

"Not right now, no."

"That's good."

"Yeah."

And back to the silence. Tatsuha cursed Screwy for saying what he already knew. You should just accept it. This is how it will be until you die. Yes, that's right, Tatsuha. You're going to die. You'll never see your nieces or nephews. You'll never hear any new music again. Most of all, you'll never see him again.

Tatsuha shook his head in frustration, closing his eyes to try to block out the now sinister voice. Oh, why don't you leave me alone?!

"Tatsuha?"

Opening his eyes, Tatsuha jumped back a little. Ryuichi was suddenly closer then what he used to be. "Um, I'm good."

The look on Ryuichi's face told the younger man that he didn't believe him.

"Honestly, Ryu, I'm..."

He should have known better.

A person couldn't talk when a pair of lips blocked their mouth from forming words.

Ryuichi pulled back and Tatsuha simply gaped at him. It took him a few minutes before he finally closed his mouth.

"Tats? Are you going to say anything?"

"I'm not sure what to say."

Ryuichi laughed, "Anything, really."

"Um."

"Words, Tatsuha, not sounds." Ryuichi narrowed his eyes before purring, "Unless they're good sounds."

Tatsuha gulped. He knew what that sentence meant and he wished the older man hadn't said it. Images of past love-making flew through his head and Tatsuha nearly groaned out loud from remembering the pleasure. "You like to torture people, right?"

"Sometimes." Ryuichi raised his hand to feel Tatsuha's hair, a frown marring his face. "When I first walked in, I thought I had the wrong room. But then I saw your eyes and I knew I was in the right place." The singer sighed, curling a hand behind Tatsuha's neck, "I miss your hair."

Tatsuha nodded, "I do too."

Ryuichi sat close to Tatsuha on the bed instead of standing like before, "May I?"

"Huh?"

"Tatsuha, think back."

"What?" Think. I'm thinking. Think back to what. Honestly, can't he say... "Oh."

FLASHBACK

"Uh, hey."

Ryuichi looked up from playing with Kuma and smiled, "Tats! You made it!"

Tatsuha nodded. He didn't know why he finally talked himself into coming to the park. What could Sakuma Ryuichi have to say to him? Unless it was about Shuichi and Eiri. "So, why did you ask for me here?"

"Hm?" Ryuichi blinked before gazing at the ground, "Oh. Sit." He patted the space next to him.

The younger man sat down, "So?"

"Give me a second, okay?"

"Um, sure."

Tatsuha looked at his watch and waited as five minutes went by. It was slightly chilly outside and he wondered why he didn't grab his jacket on the way out.

"Tatsuha?"

Tatsuha glanced at the man next to him, "Yeah?"

"I have something to tell you."

He waited for the singer to continue but when it came apparent that he wasn't going to, Tatsuha spoke again, "What is it?"

Finally, Ryuichi looked at him again and Tatsuha's heart started pounding like drums. That face; it was the same look when Ryuichi sung. The face that told how old the singer really was instead of his normal childish facade. "You promise to wait until I finish?"

Unable to speak, Tatsuha only nodded, still amazed at the eyes locked onto his.

"May I?"

Those two little words brought Tatsuha back from nice daydream and he blinked in confusion. "Huh?"

Ryuichi's hand reached and curled behind his neck, slowly tugging Tatsuha's face to his, "May I?"

Tatsuha tried to hold back a gasp as Ryuichi's lips met his, but truthfully he was glad he hadn't been able to. The tongue slinking its way in his mouth testified to that. After a few seconds of feeling heaven, Tatsuha was a little disappointed when Ryuichi pulled back.

"I like you."

"You what?"

"I like you."

"What?" Tatsuha pulled away. "You're joking right?"

Ryuichi shook his head, answering "No" before pulling the young man back in for another kiss.

END FLASHBACK

"May I?"

The words slung Tatsuha out of his memories and into reality where Ryuichi's hand tightened on his neck. If he said no, Ryuichi would probably leave. But if he said yes... oh, the possibilities.

You're dying, remember? You don't have time...

Oh, shut the hell up.

Tatsuha pulled Ryuichi to him, "Yeah, you may."

Ryuichi grinned, "Good," he said and then closed the distance between them happily.

GRAVITATION

Oh, gawd... that was too fluffy.

Be sure to check out the Tatsuha one-shot I posted, Ring Tones for the Soul. Leave some thoughts about it, 'kay?