Playing Dead


Chapter Nine

SOUNDS so loud and fearsome buzzed around him like waves crashing against a shore, thunder roaring above the Earth, train engines churning ever closer. They weren't calming in any sense, they were noises meant to scare you, erupt around you like humming foreboding and Harry wanted to drown, burn, sink or break because living was hard. For the first time he envied his parents and all those who had found death early, because he knew now that it was a reprieve and not a loss. It was freedom and he had never been afraid of dying before.

He was hunched over, blood and sweat dripping from him as one. His knees scraped painfully against the cold concrete while he was being dragged by his unruly black hair, the backs of his broken fingers trailing uselessly beside him. Harry's opponent was tough, mean and big, the ugly thing reminded him of a troll and Harry himself was in no right mental state to engage in any sort of battle.

"Stay down." The large fighter grunted as he lifted Harry's head and slammed it onto the floor, hard.

Harry's eyes were rolling to the back of his head and the pain that shot through his forehead was like claws digging into his cranium and he wondered if he might suffer brain damage from this fight. The thought pleased him, made him hopeful almost because he wanted to forget.

He realised then that the physical pain was nothing compared to the internal pain and rage he was experiencing. The only image Harry saw behind his swollen eyes was one of red hair and a fair face dotted with tiny freckles that was endearing. It haunted him as if her ghost itself was there, in the midst of the cage he was fighting in. Ironically though, she wasn't a spiritual form in his mind any longer and it seemed her power to drive him to insanity was only increased ten fold.

He had wanted this. Craved for her to be alive all this time and now he couldn't believe it, could not accept it. Harry didn't understand why his Ginny would do the things the one who pretended to be Ginny was doing. He did not want that woman. The one who worked with the Force – worked with Draco Malfoy of all the people in the world – and hid behind a cold face of pale skin and blonde hair.

Harry began to feel numb. He was uncertain if it was because he could no longer feel any part of his body or because he was simply disintegrating from the inside, caused by all the emotional pain he couldn't quite subdue, but he knew he was fast approaching his wish. He was nearing death and in those last fading moments between real and imaginative, all he could think of was how he was losing sight of who he was, where he'd come from, all the things that made him himself and he couldn't stop it. He wanted to turn around and see a world behind him devoid of pain and heart ache but he wasn't quick enough to defend himself against the final blow.

Then, his world went black.


"Harry? Harry!"

Her voice was teasing but joyful and melodious. When she laughed huskily it felt like a physical caress that had the power to touch his very soul. The broken bits and pieces of him that craved to become one again and end the internal battle of good and bad inside of him. She was like a soothing balm just as sinfully delightful as the sweet scent of flowers she trailed behind her.

"Ginny." Harry called out for her as he tried to find her.

He heard her laugh and he smiled broadly to himself before the clash of thunder roared above him. Harry frowned as he looked up at the roiling heavens now darkening from a once beautiful, cloud free sky. When his gaze came down again he immediately stiffened.

Before him was no longer a clear path but rather thick, smoky hedges that felt like they were closing in on him. Harry's first thoughts were to save Ginny and so he ran forward, lightening sometimes illuminating his ever darkening path and he grabbed his wand, casting Lumos so he could find his way better. He walked further with no proper direction in mind when he heard Ginny scream for him.

His flesh erupted in goose bumps and he ran then, trying to reach her as he called out for her. She didn't reply but her screams grew closer and more desperate.

"Ginny." Harry called.

As he turned a bend he was met with a shadowy figure waiting for him at the end of the walkway and Harry stopped for a moment, approaching at a more cautious speed with his wand held out. When he came close a gust of wind caught the hood of his first challenge and blew it off a head of pale blonde hair. Harry's wand light highlighted Malfoy's pale features and loathing immediately welled up within him.

"Where is she?" Harry demanded.

Malfoy gave him a cynical twisted smirk that Harry had always hated on his old school rival, causing Harry to clutch his wand tighter. For the first time Harry thought he could bring forth enough hatred to kill Malfoy but he held back. Then the paler wizard inclined his long face behind him and cautiously Harry looked over the other wizard's shoulder.

Relief washed over him as he saw Ginny slowly approaching him, looking unharmed. "Ginny, thank Merlin."

Harry said softly as he held out his free hand for her while still pointing his wand at Malfoy. Harry watched in horror as all the relief he felt moments ago drained from him as if he were a sieve trying to hold water. Ginny arched one perfectly shaped red eyebrow at him. Her face was a condescending look of amusement as she stopped just a foot behind Malfoy. Then she did something inexplicable and completely unbelievable, she lifted her hand and placed it on Malfoy's shoulder. Ginny's hold spoke of trust and bonds between her and Malfoy that felt utterly shattered between himself and her in that moment.

The blonde haired wizard moved his head slightly to look at Ginny's hand on his shoulder, something Harry had never seen before blazed in those cold grey eyes fleetingly before Malfoy looked towards Harry again. Then, the dark haired wizard only saw the disdain and disgust Malfoy had reserved for Harry alone all those years they were on opposite sides.

"No." Harry said in denial as he felt his insides melt into a simpering, petty mess that he could no longer bear to stand.

The laughter that surrounded him tore at his heart and rumbled within his shattered soul. Instead of saving him, she had damned him.

"Harry! Harry, get up."

Harry opened heavy eyelids and tried to focus on the bleary images all around him. He groaned, the feeling of dead weight settling all around him when suddenly his eyes shot open. Memories of the past few hours trickled through his mind like sand through an hourglass and Harry tried to sit up.

"Oh no, Harry, please lay down." Hermione's soft voice filtered trough his hazy senses.

"Hermione?" Harry asked softly.

"Yes, Harry. I'm here." Her voice was hesitant and then Harry could feel the cool of his glasses being placed on the bride of his nose.

With his vision restored Harry could make out his bedroom at Grimmauld Place and Hermione sitting on the edge of his bed, peering at him with something close to fear in her eyes.

"What happened?" Harry asked carefully, his whereabouts after he had left the Force's Headquarters still hazy and his head ached when he scrunched his brain up to try and think about them.

He noticed Hermione's concerned features and that did nothing to reassure him. Harry hoped he hadn't told anyone about his little discovery because he wasn't sure how he felt about it himself. He also couldn't be certain that any part of it was true and he had an obligation to protect everyone who held her memory in high regards before hurting them all with false hope. Or worse, the truth. In this case the truth was certainly worse.

"Harry, you were supposed to pick Teddy up two days ago to spend some time with him but when you didn't show, Andromeda was worried about you. She checked in with me, said you hadn't even contacted her at all and regardless, it was most unlike you."

Harry felt guilt pool inside of him and he was close to emptying the contents of his stomach. He had not expected to be caught by the Force but he had, and in hindsight it had been utterly stupid of him not to tell one person about his plans, even though he was capable of taking care of himself. He also did not want to lose the progress he had made with Andromeda thus far because he did not want to miss out on Teddy growing up anymore than he already had.

"When I realised you hadn't been into work I knew something was wrong." Hermione continued. "Of course Ron wanted to come here straight away, but you guys had an important field assignment and I convinced him it would be better if he went ahead, because both of you missing would be worse." Hermione rattled on, clearly anxious about what had left him in such a dire situation.

"Thanks, Hermione. I owe you and Ron one." Harry closed his eyes as he tried to work back saliva in his parched mouth.

When Hermione was silent for a long time Harry knew he would not get away with things so easily. He would have to explain himself more so since he could only imagine the state in which Hermione had found in him. The events of last night pounded against his skull as if his opponent was smashing his head into concrete once again.

"I found you in a state of blood and broken bones, so badly beaten that even Kreacher was afraid of nearing you. He was even more in a tizzy because he was forbidden to ever contact any of us." Harry could here the disapproval in her voice but he was in no fit state to feel guilt for giving his house elf an order that didn't really harm the elf. Or argue the matter with a house elf activist.

"It was a wonder you even apparated here, Harry." Harry could honestly not remember how he had ended up coming back to Grimmauld Place but he didn't want to tell Hermione that. "So it was no surprise to find you splinched just as badly as you were beaten." Harry flinched as he realised that the cold, throbbing pain in his leg was because he had been splinched. "I couldn't think past healing you and letting you rest. What is going on with you, Harry?"

Hermione asked sternly but the concern was evident in her trembling voice. The fear had been for his life. Harry thought that was ironic considering he had gone into last night's fight with the want to die. It had been a cowardly thing to do, he knew because only the weak gave in. Harry sighed softly and sat up slowly. Hermione had obviously healed him well but he could feel the strain and twinges in his body and he was sure the bruising had not yet subsided as well.

"Harry, please tell me what's going on. I know something's wrong but you promised you wouldn't start fighting again. You said you'd talk to Ron and I if you felt the urge to return to the fight clubs again." Hermione's face was lined with worry and heart ache.

Harry suspected that Hermione hadn't meant to sound so accusing but he heard it in her strained voice nonetheless. She was trying her hardest to show restraint but she was upset and disappointed too. She hurt for him and Harry realised then that he was being completely unfair to his best friend. She didn't deserve this, especially not after all that she had done for him. One of his most loyal and trusted friends. His confidant, his priceless treasure. She had always been his strength and Ron had always been his humility, the ground beneath his feet that kept him humble and grounded.

Harry sighed loudly and then focused on Hermione. Inhaling deeply he readied himself for the onslaught of emotions he knew he would be unleashing when he spoke next.

"She's alive, Hermione. She says she never died." Harry's voice broke and his throat clogged with a large ball of hurt that he couldn't swallow past for how vile and poisonous the tormented words tasted in his mouth.

"Who, Harry. Who are you talking about?"

"Ginny." Hermione looked dumbfounded for once in her life and Harry launched into his unbelievable tale of his time with the Force before he could lose himself completely.


"No." He said as he took a step back. "Is this some sort of twisted game?" He turned towards Draco Malfoy who was glaring hard at him. Harry knew Malfoy for years now and planting a Ginny look alike at Maison de Malfoy to deter and confuse him, unhinge him was extremely plausible. Harry looked close to senile in that moment.

But it was Jennifer who answered. "No. It really is me, Harry."

"Liar!" Harry roared. "Ginny is dead." He had spent years hearing that but now he was the one saying it, admitting it. It felt strange, still surreal.

He had wanted Ginny to be alive so desperately. He had hoped, dreamed, craved for her not to be dead. Harry had survived death and he had wanted her to do the same. He had wished with all his heart and soul that she would live again but life and death didn't work like that. Just like it hadn't worked for his parents or Sirius or Dumbledore or Remus or Fred or anyone on that blasted list of his.

"Harry." Her voice, so much like Ginny's, broke on his name. "Harry, it's me."

Harry paced the damaged room like a caged lion. He refused to look at her because seeing Ginny before him, alive after all this time, regardless of it being a lie, was too unbearable to watch. His magic crackled violently around him and there was no doubt in any of the Force's minds as to how powerful he truly was.

The ties of dark magic around the Force members grew stronger but the silence in the room was almost tangible. It was there, thick and suffocating and Harry felt like he was choking on every inhalation he took. He wondered why, why he was struggling with comprehending this when he should have been embracing it, something he had dreamed about for days, months and years now. But then he realised that it had been a feeble string of hope that had held him together all those times he had been at his closest to breaking.

And when he had imagined Ginny coming back to him it most certainly hadn't been like this. She had always been good natured and he had expected her to always be that way. She was one of the truest people he had known, pure and untainted, someone he had trusted with his life and now, that person was dead. Or she had been a lie and Harry found himself wishing for the very first time ever that it was not the latter of his thoughts. He didn't know who the woman before him was but she could not be his Ginny Weasley.

"This is some sort of sick ploy so I don't turn you in." Harry sent a scathing look at Draco while waving a hand at the other wizards in the room. "Trying to mess with my memory, playing with my mind so I don't incriminate you lot. Trying to obliviate me and when that didn't work your fall back plan was to produce a fake girlfriend so I wont go blabbing."

"No." Ginny said desperately as she struggled against her bonds. "No, Harry. I am Ginny." She sounded desperate for him to believe her, almost as if she couldn't believe what she was doing but then she took in a deep breath. "The first summer you came to the Burrow I couldn't even speak to you. I was so embarrassed, I stuck me elbow in a butter – "

"Rage, you don't have to do this." Draco pleaded from beside her and Harry turned to glare at his arch rival.

"No, I have to." She said softly. "He deserves the truth."

Harry scoffed. "You people are sick." Harry had expected something like this from Malfoy, knew he was twisted enough for an act so terrible but for Jennifer to be apart of it all, it was almost unthinkable.

Not that Harry knew her all that well but from what he had seen, she hadn't struck him as someone who was completely heartless. Which was what you had to be to emulate a dead person, something almost as vile as raising up Inferi. After all, she had shown she was capable of real hurt and compassion when she spoke to him in that cave the first time he had met her. How long ago was that now? It seemed like ages ago.

"Harry, you saved me from the Chamber of Secrets. You never noticed me until your sixth year. That was when –"

"Anyone could tell me those things." Harry cut her off this time although he couldn't quite tell if it was because he couldn't bear to hear his past from a woman who was posing as his dead girlfriend or for the reason he gave her.

"Look at me then." She shouted and Harry's eyes shot to hers.

She was upset then. She looked and sounded like Ginny. Her hair and eyes and everything about her was Ginny, like the way she had been even behind the mask of a glamour charm. All her mannerisms and expressions, everything about her was Ginny. Like the anger sparking in golden flecks in her bright brown eyes now.

Though she had no right, no right whatsoever, to demand anything from him. No privilege to even ask anything of him and become upset with him. As if she had read his every nuance, she took in a deep breath and closed her eyes. Her throat worked as she swallowed deeply and when she opened her eyes again he could see pain seeping through her gaze.

"You're right." She said in a placating voice. "There's a mark below my collar bone though." Ginny said softly and she looked down. "Something you saw in the room of requirement the night I … the night of the final battle."

Harry thought he would have laughed if she had said the night she died but maybe that was a slip up. A mistake, an error because she really was pretending to be someone she wasn't. Harry watched her sceptically but walked towards her nonetheless. Slowly he reached out and pulled the tops of her shirt down without touching her skin. Next to him he could feel the insurmountable tension radiating from Malfoy. Then the way Malfoy had spoken to Ginny reverberated in his mind. The name Malfoy called her, "Rage" sounded so personal and intimate and Harry felt doubt spark inside of him all over again.

Then the words "blood traitor" on her body became visible to Harry, fine white lines, scarred into her forever, and he froze. He remembered that day as if it were yesterday. Slowly his eyes met hers and that shade of bright brown burned into him.

The same bright brown, with molten gold flashing like sparks of life, that blazing look of determination etched into her gaze as it had always been in Ginny's. "You told me once that you smelled me in Amotentia, Harry. You used to say I smelled like – "

"Flowers." Harry finished softly.

She nodded, the movement causing stray strands of her hair to fall onto her shoulder as if just for him to smell her again. And he could, he could discern the fresh scents that blossomed around her like a blooming rose bud. Once again he thought of how he couldn't find that unique scent that was Ginny after the battle.

"Look inside yourself, Harry. Deep down you know it's me. You've known for a while now."

Tears plopped into his hand that was still resting blow her shoulder and he looked up at her again. When his eyes met hers – he knew. Deep down in the pits of his broken soul, he knew.

She – Ginny – nodded again and Harry closed his eyes in disbelief. Trying to rationalise everything she had just said. Her bonds loosened without it being his intention to do so and Ginny sank to her knees with a sob. Harry stepped back and when he opened his eyes once more Ginny was moving towards a drawer in the room.

Harry didn't allow the other wizards the same courtesy of freedom as he had allowed her and he walked stealthily behind her. Then he watched her – Ginny – rummage in a drawer before turning around. She gasped when she realised Harry was so close to her she could feel his breath on her face. She was nervous, scared and she looked like she would be sick at any moment. Then she swallowed and nodded. Whether to appease him or encourage herself Harry couldn't quite tell and it angered him. She was as much a stranger to him now as Jennifer had been. Ginny took out a gleaming dagger and held it up between them.

Harry couldn't help the small grin that curved his lips. "Do you plan on killing me now?" He asked mockingly.

Ginny glared at him. "If I had wanted to kill you I wouldn't have made an open play in trying to do so. I would have slit your neck already."

"Assuming you could of course." Harry rejoined. "Your confidence in your abilities surprises me, Jennifer." He said the faux name with sarcasm that he was pleased to see had not been lost on Ginny. Now he understood why Jennifer could blush so red.

"This will prove who I am without a shadow of doubt." She said and Harry looked down to see her cut her index finger.

Then she reached behind her, placed the dagger down upon the drawer and brought a phial forward, without taking her eyes of Harry. He saw confidence in her gaze even though it was marred with fear and his heart started to pound in his chest. As if this was only just bringing home for him the realisation of the fact that Ginny was alive. Harry watched as she pressed her finger against the glass and blood dribbled inside the holder. Then she held it out to him.

When Harry took the phial from her their fingers brushed and he was positive that he felt a familiar tug in his gut. He hastily snatched the glass from her and he idly thought that he was making a collection of phials where this woman was concerned.

Then he waved his hand and the wizards in the room fell to the floor. "I'll be back soon." Harry threatened before he made his way down the steps of the upper storey.

If he familiarised himself with the place then he had no doubt he could find his way back. He didn't need to turn around because if it really was Ginny in that room he knew that he would never be attacked while his back was turned. Then again, could he really put his faith in a woman who had been living a life based on illegalities and lies for the past three years? Harry gave a cynical smile as he realised some of his more naïve characteristics were still there. Frail and deeply hidden but there nonetheless.

Although, he mentally dared anyone to attack him while he walked away with his shoulders held high, because he would have loved nothing better than to curse them all. Especially that pale faced ferret.


"Harry, you know how outrageous this sounds, don't you?" Hermione looked at him sceptically after he had finished speaking.

"Yes, thank you, Hermione. I know how it sounds but you also know I'd never lie about something like this. Even if I were having one of my "moments of darkness" as you like to call it." Harry said bitterly and he was pleased to see his best friend wince at his statement.

"What do I have to do?" Hermione looked determinedly at Harry and he appreciated her then more than he ever had before.

Especially considering that he hadn't even had to ask. She knew him well enough to know what he was thinking and she was offering her unconditional help and loyalty. She was the best friend who would go to the ends of the Earth for him even when there was a possibility that he could be wrong about where that path would lead her.

Hermione was the sister he had never had and too choked up with emotion to reply then, unable to hold himself together any longer, Harry finally sank into Hermione's arms which had opened instinctually for him. Like a mother cradling her first born child, wishing she could have protected him from heart ache, Hermione held him close to her and made soothing noises while Harry cried.

He wept because even though losing Ginny had been hard, if she was alive it would not be the best thing that could have ever happened to him as he had believed it would be. It would feel like the biggest betrayal anyone brought upon him and would cause the most pain he had ever endured. Worse than burying her had brought upon him. There was nothing worse and he didn't know what he would do when he had solid, indisputable proof that Jennifer really was Ginny.


Hermione was feeling guilty and unhappy about what she was about to do, but what other choice did she have really? Ever since Ginny had died Harry had been a shell of his old self. And the parts of him that still existed were so prone to a dark nature that he honestly scared her at times.

Hermione didn't think that Harry would ever hurt her or his loved ones but it was his own self that she and everyone else worried about. His guilt and heartache made him a danger to himself. Hermione had tried for years on end to fix him, she and Ron had fought tooth and nail for him and finally he had been slowly but surely coming back to them.

He had finally accepted his responsibilities, he had been learning to let go of the past and then this Jennifer witch showed up. Hermione didn't like her. It was impossible for Ginny to be alive. It just did not make any sense. It was illogical, a theory not even the wistful Luna Lovegood could conjure up. She had been there when they had found Ginny's dead body with Fred's. They had buried her and three years later Harry said he saw her alive. Working for the Force, breaking laws with Draco Malfoy no less? It was utter rubbish. Nonsense.

Yet Hermione could not bring herself to tell Harry that. She may have been able to reason with Harry but she had never seen Harry the way she had tonight. The pain he had physically wept in the form of his blood was heart wrenching and it had made Hermione bleed for him herself, more so when he had cried in her arms.

If this girl wasn't Ginny then Hermione felt that at least Harry would be able to finally move forward. She had seen him when he was trying to reincarnate Ginny and it had not been a pretty sight. Hermione was just happy Harry had spoken to her about it instead of Ron. When Harry's hopes were crushed – and it would be decimated, of that Hermione was certain – then it would be like losing Ginny all over again. Only this time, the sting would not hurt as much as it had the first time. Harry would realise that he had come a long way since the war and that he could move past Ginny's death again. This time for good.

The other possibility was impossible and Hermione knew better than to plan for something that would never be. But how many times had she been close minded to things that had come to pass? She may be highly intelligent but there were things that even she didn't know.

"Oh, Merlin help us all." Hermione whispered as she closed her eyes and prayed for forgiveness.

She raised her wand and thought of a quick nonverbal spell. The knife in Ron's hand slipped and cut into his finger deeply.

"Hell." Ron cursed as he turned around to make his way towards the sink, he picked up his wand and made to heal his cut magically.

Hermione quickly picked up the discarded knife he had been using and scraped it against the rim of a phial she had been clutching in her lap behind their breakfast counter, before slipping it safely into her pocket.

It already seemed to weigh down in her pocket, as if ready to burn a hole of deception and disaster through her clothing. However Hermione gritted her teeth and made her way towards Ron. She took his wand gently from him and placed it on a counter before kissing his newly healed finger. Ron gave her a quizzical look but all Hermione could do was wrap her arms around him and hold onto him tightly, pouring all the love she had for him into her embrace.

If Ginny was really, alive as Harry believed, then Merlin help them all indeed …


"Do you have it?" Harry asked as he stopped his pacing the moment Hermione entered his lounge the next morning.

Hermione noticed that Harry looked haggard and pale. He obviously hadn't gotten much sleep last night, if at all and with the pain and anxiety he must be feeling from all his injuries and thoughts he possibly felt a thousand times worse than he should have. She also doubted that he had eaten anything since days ago.

"I'll go make us some tea." She suggested.

"No." Harry snapped and when Hermione cringed at his tone he immediately apologised. "I'm so tired, Hermione, but I can't stand another moment of not knowing."

Hermione nodded understandably and pulled out the phial she had in her work robes. She was lying to Ron and it didn't feel right at all but she had to help Harry. Hermione set the blood down on Harry's coffee table. She then pulled out another phial and poured it into the cauldron Harry already had waiting for her.

She held out her hand and Harry jerkily placed his phial in her palm. The moment her fingers closed around the glass she felt a tingle of foreboding pulse through her hold and she knew she had to speak. Hermione looked up at Harry. She had to do it or she would regret it for the rest of her life.

"Harry, you don't have to do this you know. Either way this is going to be one of the worse revelations you ever make. We can forget this, Harry. We can pretend that it never happened and we can move on like we were doing before Jennifer arrived."

Harry's eyes looked haunted. Hermione was positive she could see memories of the past cast shadows across his startling emerald eyes. For a moment she thought she saw a flash of red hair in his gaze and in that second Harry looked happy, like his old self again, slightly cracked but not broken. Then he blinked and whatever Hermione thought she witnessed disappeared into a daunting nothingness that made her heart wrench for him as he gave her a humourless smile. His eyes however were focused on the cauldron between them now.

"I've spent the entire night weighing my options, Hermione. I may not be as smart as you are but don't you think I've already thought about everything that you have? But I have to know. If I don't then it will haunt me more than the past does. I'll always think what if."

He lifted his eyes to look at her again, blinking that far away and empty look from his gaze. Hermione swallowed and nodded then, steeling her resolve for Harry's sake. She inhaled deeply before lifting her up wand, she muttered the proper spell and cast two parallel wand movements over the cauldron. The potion immediately started to bubble and boil before turning a pure white.

Hermione then uncapped the phials of blood and emptied them into the cauldron. She felt an ominous shudder skitter down her spine. Before her eyes the potion turned a bright red instead of the coal black she had been expecting. The colour of blood, the same blood to be precise. Ron's blood matched the one in the other phial. The blood in the phial Jennifer had given Harry matched Ron's. Jennifer and Ron were related.

No matter how may times Hermione deduced that in her mind she still could not wrap her brain around it. Because it had been so impossible, however now she had incontrovertible proof staring her in the face. Hermione Granger, brightest witch of her age, the girl who swallowed books whole and depended and relied heavily on facts could not deny the one staring right at her, daring her to contradict it. Harry had been right. Ginny was alive.

Harry. Oh, sweet Merlin. Hermione's eyes slowly lifted to Harry's face. He looked like a marble statue. Pale and unmoving and Hermione didn't know what do to or say. She felt as shocked as he looked. He was not even blinking though, so still he stood it looked like he wasn't breathing even.

"Harry?" Hermione said timidly.

"Leave." Harry said quietly but Hermione didn't think that was such a good idea. "And don't tell anyone."

"Harry, I don't think – "

"Out!" He bellowed and Hermione shrieked as she jumped back. Harry was rolling his head around and closing his eyes, breathing deeply through flared nostrils and she knew he needed time alone.

"If you need me …" She trailed of uncertainly but Harry had already moved away from her to stand over the simmering cauldron.

Hermione quickly grabbed her bag and headed for the door. She was just about to close it behind her when she heard a loud roar of fury and pain. She was sure a cauldron went thumping into a wall and smashing onto the floor.

Hermione winced and closed her eyes, shutting the door behind her and resting her head against it. Silent tears streamed down her face. She wondered if Harry could save them through this. She was wrong; maybe no one could help them now. She had never thought of herself as a bad person before and it was odd that she had spent years wishing Ginny was alive but for the first time ever Hermione wished that Ginny really was dead. Because she couldn't understand how anyone could have done what Ginny had. Not to Harry. Not to any of them who had loved her and mourned her.