9.

A few weeks later we have a Raw-taping in my hometown and because we are friends now I decide to invite Adam to come to my house a few hours before the show to spend some time together. I spend most of yesterday cleaning, since I'm on the road I've been slacking things around my house, I just get home, throw the dirty clothes in the washing machine and do nice things. I had an enormous stack of both fresh and dirty clothes lying around my bedroom and loads of paper-work, magazines, books and empty bottles in my living room. I stand before my closet and try to figure out an outfit that will make me look great. The weather is finally good enough to wear my summerclothes. I think it is great that Adam and I are friends, but all the onscreen kissing has definitely awoken the feelings I have for him deep inside me. I like being around him and he makes me laugh all the time and when he puts his arm around me or touches me in a friendly manner I get that tingly feeling in my stomach. I've always been really busy combining school with my training so I never had the time for a real boyfriend, I dated but it never got to something serious. I know Adam is 10 years older, he has been married two times, and I know about the Lita-affair so I don't know what to think of him. We've never really discussed our love-lives, I know he is single right now and he knows I am as well, but that's all we ever said about it.

I search through my clothes. On the inside of my closet I hung my old size 14 pants to look at every time I get dressed so I can be proud of myself. I put on a petrol blue knee-length skirt and a tight white top with black lace trim around the armholes. I put my black maryjanes on my feet as they reveal my tattoo. It is a pink ribbon bow. I got it together with my best friend Monica, it stands for the strong connection we have together.

Then the bell rings, I get out my bedroom and open the door. My apartment is really very small; I have a small living-room with an open kitchen and an even smaller bedroom where I keep my bed and 2 big closets stacked with clothes. The bathroom has a shower, a toilet and a sink and I have a really small hall with a coat-rack and a small table I keep my scarves and gloves on. I like my house though, I bought a very pretty couch with a French lily-print with a matching footstool from my first pay check and there is a wall totally covered in framed pictures of my friends and family. I used to keep a few posters of my favourite wrestlers like Trish, Shawn Michaels and Adam in my bedroom but I removed them after I signed my contract, it made me feel weird. I do have a shelf on the wall with many action figures of my favourite wrestlers. Adam enters the room and I offer him some coffee. While I'm making coffee he walks to this shelf and grabs his own action figure.

'I see I'm always here with you already! I love how you stalled all these out right here!' he says. I smile and explain I had those there that way before I became a diva myself. I hand him his coffee and we sit down on the couch.

'I like your apartment, but I expected something bigger. I know how much starting Divas make; I guess you can afford a bigger place.' He says after we've talked for a while. I reply:

'Yeah, I can easily afford a bigger apartment now, or even a small house, but I don't have the time to move. And I became quite attached to this house now so I don't know. I guess I just save the money for when I do have the time to move.'

He smiles at me; he knows how little time you have when you're on the road. We can take a week or two off but because I just work there it may take a while before it is time for my weeks off.

As we're talking the doorbell rings again and I walk to the door. I am not expecting anyone. Through the glass I can see my little brother. He is 16 and is carrying a book.

'Is he here yet?' he whispers to me and then adding louder 'Mom asked me to bring this book; she said you asked her to borrow it.' And he hands me the book, I see it is some uninteresting book about gardens, I don't even HAVE a garden, so I put it on the little table in the hall. I invite him in for some coffee, I know he wanted to meet Adam and he just made this excuse up to pay me a visit. I enter the room again and introduce them to each other:

'Adam, this is my little brother Philip, Philip, this is Adam, but I think you recognize him already.' Philip and my parents weren't able to see me live in action with the WWE yet because my shows were all over the country, but they have ringside seats for the show tonight. I wanted to surprise them and take them backstage before the show, but I guess Philip wanted to make sure he would meet one of his favourite wrestler tonight so came to me now. Philip is a bit jealous of my career in the WWE and just started working out last year to become more fit so he could follow my steps. He is already becoming more muscular. He makes some small talk with Adam as I make him a cup of coffee. I take a seat on the chair in front of the two men and smile at them.

'I was going to take you backstage tonight, so you didn't have to come now!' I say to him to make him feel just a bit guilty about coming in with such a lame excuse. He spoiled my afternoon; I decided to tell Adam how I feel about him this afternoon because I don't want to lie to him. I know I am probably not going to get Philip out of here before we leave for the show so I can't talk to him now. We talk about wrestling and Philip asks Adam to spear him but he keeps refusing. He is sad that the two-time-champion won't do it but I am glad, Philip isn't near being ready to take something like that, I know they hurt, I tried to convince Adam on spearing me one time and I had a sore back after that. I try to look at Philip and tell him with my eyes I want him out of here. He doesn't see it, or doesn't care about it, he stays where he is. When Adam goes to the bathroom I tell Philip I want him to leave or he will spoil his chance to go backstage tonight. He looks at me with a sad face and says:

'You want to be alone with Adam, right? I know you like him, even a blind man could see that.' I get a very angry look on my face threaten again to not take him backstage so when Adam comes back Philip tells him he is going to take a shower at home before the show. I tell him we will meet them in an hour at my parents' house and walk him to the door.

After Philip has left I sit next to Adam on the couch. I kick my shoes off and pull my legs upon the couch so I am facing him. His arm is resting on the backside of the couch and he is looking my way. He looks really good when he sits like this wearing a nice shirt and knee length army shorts. He smiles at me and I don't know whether the silence between us is the uncomfortable one or the one you have when you just enjoy each other's company, when he starts to talk:

'I like your brother! If he is just as talented as you he could go far.' I smile at him, not knowing what to say, it is the right time to tell him I like him, but I don't know how. Then he talks again:

'I didn't know you had a tattoo. I love it. Does it have some sort of special meaning?'

'It's a friendship tattoo I got together with my best friend, she has the same but on the other foot. It stands for our bond together. We got the idea from a song, without each other we would mess things up, without the pretty pink ribbon, we would totally screw things up.'

'What a great idea. I really like it. But I was wondering something else, can I stay at your place tonight? I didn't book a hotel room because I thought you meant for me to stay overnight, but now I see you don't have a guestroom. I can still book a room for the night if you want me to?'

Comment from author: first one to guess from what song the tattoo came is a hero!