Hi everyone! I made a promise to myself that I would try to upload a chapter a day but don't be upset if I miss a few, I'm trying! Anyway, send me some pm's and we can chit chat about the show or writing and what now! This chapter is a filler, not much Braille but it will lead somewhere I promise. The next few chapters may end up being fillers just to give you kind of a deeper look into Callie and Brandon when they're apart. Enjoy
"I can hear those echoes in the wind at night
Calling me back in time
Back to you
In a place far away
Where the water meets the sky
The thought of it makes me smile
You are my tomorrow"
The next morning I woke up to a singing in my head. I'm not sure why it took this long for my life to finally reach a decent point but I think it was worth the wait. I rolled over to my side to reach my phone on the nightstand. Maybe Brandon had sent me a good morning text. I realized that Lena and Stef must have already taken it away while I was sleeping. Shit.
The shower turned on from two doors down and I noticed that Mariana was no longer in her bed. I decided to head downstairs to see everyone, I was most likely the last person in the Foster house up. I walked to the closet and pulled out a pair of jeans and an old, loose - fitting gray shirt. The t - shirt that I decided to wear once belonged to my dad, pre-drinking, but it no longer smelled like him. This shirt was the only thing I decided to keep of my father's. What he did, who he was - I couldn't change that. No one could take it back. I was lucky enough to know my father before he fell of course. He once wore this shirt to a soccer game I played in. The coach was sick so he filled in for him. I remember watching him yell enthusiastically at my teammates, thinking of how lucky I was to have him as my coach. I remember looking into the bleachers and seeing my very pregnant mother giving me a thumbs up, even when I let every kick into that goal.
Upon arriving downstairs, I found everyone watching Saturday morning cartoons, except for Jesus who must have been the Foster occupying the bathroom. Brandon flashed me one of his knee buckling grins and I felt the heat rise throughout my body. I sat in between Lena and Stef. Without giving it a second thought, I gave Stef a kiss on the cheek and rested my head on Lena's shoulder. I felt safe. I was aware of the confusion being passed between the two as they gave each other a look but everyone needed to feel appreciated every once in a while and hey - I was in a great mood, so why not?
"Take that shirt off." Jude sat across the room and never took his eyes off the television set.
My brother never got a chance to really know my father. He was relatively young when the drinking started. All his memory can recall was some drinking and parts of the car crash. He knew that this shirt had belonged to him. Every time he saw me wearing it, I was asked to remove it. Even if he was younger than I was, I always did what I was told.
"Ok Jude." I whispered as I made my way up to my shared bedroom. I felt each tear burn a hole into my skin. I felt like a traitor.
A soft knock was casted on the door. Thinking it was Brandon, I opened the door. To my surprise, Stef walked in. I quickly wiped the tears and put on a smile.
"Honey, lets talk." I nodded and followed her over to the bed. She allowed me to lay my head upon her lap while we talked. She traced circles with her fingers on the back of my neck. Just like my mother used to do. "Why did Jude ask you to change your clothes?"
The one thing I admired most about Stef was her cut to the chase attitude. She was just like me. She never beat around the bush. "It used to be our dad's."
She nodded in understanding, though I'm not sure that she really understood at all. "Lena told me what happened last night, how you flinched when she came near you. This time it was my turn to nod my head. I didn't like where this conversation was headed. "I guess I was just on edge, that's all."
"Callie, we were going to wait until after dinner tonight but Lena thinks it would be a good idea to say something now. Someone has been looking into you and Jude's file for two weeks now. They want to meet you late next week to look into maybe seeing if you're a good match for adoption."
Stef continued on about the wonderful family from New Hampshire who lived in California during the summer. Someone was interested in us, the Jacobs. She went on and on about the speech therapist who couldn't get pregnant after years of trying and her husband, the lawyer who looked into adoption. They realized that it was there, as Stef put it, 'calling in life' to have a teenage girl and younger son. But I heard none of that.
I heard ringing. Sirens. Screaming. Silence. I heard ringing, drowning out the voices of Lena, Stef, Brandon, Jesus and Mariana, begging me not to leave. Begging me not to take Jude away from them so soon. Here I was, picturing myself in some cabin in the woods up north with some other family. There was no twin rivalries. No beach outside of our school. There would be no breakfast cooked by Lena every morning and I couldn't watch Stef dance her partner around the kitchen during dinner. There would be no scheduled bathroom times. There would be no fights between Mariana and myself over closet space. There would be no familiar routes for me to walk everyday. There would be no more bowls too high for me to reach. There would be no more warm weather all year round. There would be no more china dolls. No more Diane's Diner. No more chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream at 3 am. No more California Poppies. No more amazingly, sadistic plastic stars. And there would be no more sneaking around because there would be no more Brandon.
"Um - I will have to see what Jude wants." Stef nodded, kissed the top of my head and exited my room. She left me to collect my own thoughts.
A few seconds later, I heard a beep from under my bed. I retrieved my phone from behind the post on the ground. Apparently they hadn't taken it away. I had one message waiting. I opened up the text that read,
So, Stef told you, I'm assuming?
Tears filled my eyes once again. He was just asking me on a date last night when all along he knew I was going to have one foot out the door? Maybe he was just like every other guy I've ever been with. He knew I could be shipped off to New Hampshire any day now and he was making me fall in love with him.
I took my phone and threw it straight at the wall. Downstairs, my 'family' sat laughing at an animated feature. Down the hall, Jesus shut the shower off and returned to his bedroom. Down below my feet, was my broken cell phone. Just like my heart and my life that was falling apart into the same number of pieces. I waited so long for this but it wasn't suppose to happen like this. It wasn't suppose to happen right now. I could never have just one good day.
