I thought I was going to blaze through my list on my profile in one month. Well, it looks like it's going to take a while before that happens. XD The list is super long now.

Since no one answered the question in the last story, I'll answer it. It was Steve from the fan-made game HetaOni. The name Steve was given to him by fans. If Steve was ever a human, he'll be a creepy opium dealer. :D

I absolutely love the request of Team Germany and Romano. That's going to be very fun to write~ *evil laugh*

1. If you're raising money to help a fellow country, don't let them know until the end.

2. Schemes can be legal or not. (Try not to get arrested or worse.)

3. The schemes can range from a country's specialty to ideas from the news.

4. Countries can team up and work together.

The golden rule: If possible, don't spend money to make money.


Earlier in the day, France witnessed an unkempt man getting rejected by a beautiful woman. It was a pathetic display of courting. The man gave terrible pick-up lines, and in the end, he ended up getting slapped by the woman.

Contrary to popular belief, the French rarely use pick-up lines. It's all about flirting, being casual and romantic, and having a carefree attitude. But it doesn't mean that his citizens have to be horrible at it.

Men these days have no clue on how to properly court a woman. It's as if they took courting lessons from England's people!

That's when an incredible idea hit France: run a telephone help line to give advice to hopeless men in scoring their dream girl. (He's especially teaching them excellent pick-up lines.) France is the country of love, he's qualified for this job.

France certainly needs the money. He desperately wants to buy higher quality wine. The wine he has money for tastes like crap. The Frenchman wants the good stuff.

France sits on his conch comfortably, staring at his home phone in anticipation. France sighs, "Mon dieu, when am I going to get a customer? I didn't think it would take so long." Honestly, France thought he would have customers pouring in. Sadly, he is wrong.

Maybe I should have advertised more on Facebook? His phone starts ringing. France picks up the phone in excitement and answers it. It's his first customer; he hopes he does a good job.

"Bonjour! Welcome to Pick-U-Up Lines. Are you ready to woo your future lover to bed?"

"What the bloody hell are you saying, frog? Is this a sick French joke!?"

A devilish smile worms its way onto France's face. He's going to have a lot of fun with the black sheep. "Ah, Angleterre, I knew it was a matter of time before you called me for advice on love~"

"I did not! I called to tell you the date for next G8 summit meeting, you git. Your so-called 'help line' is the same number as your house phone!"

France wishes he could see the look on England's face. England's angry face is amusing to look at. In France's opinion, the angry face makes England's ugly eyebrows look like a wild caterpillar on the loose.

France wants to steer the conversation to something more….interesting. "It's a shame the English are horrible lovers. Everyone knows the French are the best lovers. Look at the caterpillar on your face. I recommend you shave it off; it might attract some ladies, if you're lucky," laughs France.

"Englishmen are better lovers! We gentlemen are able to keep our girlfriends longer than unfaithful Frenchman," hollered England into the phone.

France narrows his eyes. How dare that scone lover say such a thing! If England was in the room, he would punch him. "I know better pick-up lines than you," challenges France.

"Is that a challenge?"

France smiles gleefully. England sounds so furious, yet there's a small hint of interest in his voice. "Oui. The winner is crowned the best lover and gets bragging rights for a year."

"I'll beat you at your own game, git."

France voices his afterthought, "Also, whoever back downs pays the bill."

"Why the bloody hell should I pay your phone bill?"

"Non, not the phone bill. The bill for my services. You are using time on my company phone," corrected France.

"It's your house phone, not a company phone!"

France decides to interrupt England before he goes on a rant. He didn't want him to lose track of the competition, after all.

"I'll start: Do you believe in love at first sight? Or should I walk by again?"

"I can top that! If a fat man puts you in a bag at night, don't worry I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas."

France breaks into hysterics. "Are you in a festive mood, Angleterre? Maybe Pere Noel will give you good pick-up lines for Christmas," mocks France. He knew England is terrible at flirting, but not this bad. The former pirate resorted to cheesy pick-up lines!

"I'd love to see you do better."

"Gladly. If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me? Ohonhon~" France wraps one arm around himself.

"You perverted frog! It's typical of you to say revolting things."

"Are you already backing down? I'll gladly send you the bill right now." France will definitely send England an extra expensive bill. It'll be fun to drain heaps of England's money.

"I'm not surrendering to you of all people! I've got skittles in my mouth, want to taste the rainbow?"

"Oh my Angleterre. I never knew you wanted to share a French kiss with me~"

"I will not kiss you, bloody frog. I-" "Hey England, are you and France finally releasing your guy's sexual tension," interrupts America on England's side of the phone.

"I am not-" The phone hangs up. France grins. He won the pick-up line contest. Of course he would. He's French, after all.

France's phone rings again. He smiles. Hopefully, it's another customer and not England calling him again to complain that he 'didn't' lose. If so, he'll send the bill after this call.

"Bonjour! Welcome to Pick-U-Up Lines. Are you ready to woo your future lover to bed?"

"You're going to help me 'woo' big brother, or else."

France gulps, "Is that you, Belarus?"

"Yes." Belarus pauses for a moment. "If you don't help me, let's just say I know where you live."

France definitely gave Belarus love advice after that sentence. At least Belarus pays good, though.


Russia walks around his house when a chill crawls up his spine. His Belarus-is-nearby sense is ringing alarm bells in his head. Russia power walks to the safety of his room. Right when he opens his bedroom door, Belarus pounces on him from behind.

Russia falls to the floor, with Belarus still on his back. Belarus immediately flips Russia, so he's facing her. Belarus keeps one knee between her brother's legs, and her other leg on his left leg. The woman leans towards his face, with a creepy smile on her face.

Russia's body freezes. He can't escape from Belarus' grasp. The Russian prepares himself for the dreaded 'marry me' line. "W-What do you want, Belarus?"

Belarus puts her nose to Russia's nose. She whispers, "Want to help me repopulate our countries, big brother?"

Russia shoves Belarus off of him and runs through the wall, screaming for Belarus to leave him alone.

Frugal Money Scheme: Success.


New Rule: Countries are allowed to crash other countries schemes, making them succeed or not. Everything is fair game when it comes to money. I released this rule late because I wanted it to be a surprise, somewhat.

What France said is true: People in France don't really use pick-up lines. They flirt, yes, by being casual with a carefree attitude and being romantic. Just because the French don't use pick-up lines, it doesn't mean they're not open to it by foreigners. ;)

Pere Noel- Santa Clause

"Want to help me repopulate our countries, big brother?" This line is a play on the infamous "Wanna help me repopulate my clan?" pick-up line in the Naruto fandom. Specifically, the Sasuke/oc pairing. I hope no one gets too offended by that. XD


Esor: Naw, calling me love doesn't sound creepy to me. As long as you don't go Belarus on me, (with her 'marry me' stuff.)I'm fine with it. XD I'll do both of your requests. It sounds fun~

Guest: You figured out one of the reasons America needs to raise money. China is not taking no for an anwser after the Extreme Cheapskates chapter. :D The other one is in a previous chapter.

Sakura Ichigo Morihiko: I'll do something for Japan and Russia. The America one sounds interesting. Although I'm not going to make America smoke it... I wouldn't feel comfortable doing that. It'll also bump the rating to M. XD (Which I'm trying to avoid for this fic.)