Disclaimer: I own no Batman characters. They belong to DC comics, Bob Kane, and in some cases, Chris Nolan.
Crane and Edward= Love.
'Nuff said. Enjoy.
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Bruce and Jack looked at each other, then to Crane and Edward. Did this seriously happen? Yes. Didn't Edward and Crane only know each other for all of 12 hours? Yes. Was this an entirely bad situation? No. No, it wasn't, this could be an entirely good situation. One which finally didn't result in Crane getting his heart beat up and smashed to pieces.
Crane climbed under the sheets, trying to hide the shame. To late, to him, this situation was shameful, indeed. Edward's face just turned every shade of pink, crimson, and red. Then, without warning, Bruce burst out laughing.
Crane poked his head out of the covers. "What is so funny, huh, Mister. Wayne?" Crane hissed. Bruce kept laughing. Bruce whipped the tears away from his eyes. "I'm s-sorry, it's just.... Heh-ha-hehHAHAHA!" Bruce fell into a broken laugh, again. "Bruce, laughing is my job, now, can you let us all in on what is so funny?" The Joker said, curtly.
"Ya' know, Johnny, I always pinned you as being the taker, not the giver." Bruce burst out laughing, again. Crane frowned and turned a color close to Edward's. Edward frowned to, in his relationship with the Joker, he was always the taker, Edward, I mean. It just seemed natural for him to be over powered.
"Well, as you should know, Brucey, I'm not so feminine in the sack, am I? Actually, if I do say so myself, I'm an animal. Yea, in fact, I'm a lion. And. You. All. Are. My. Prey." Crane said the last part in such a sensual tone, that all three other men, immediately pitched a tent in their pants.
"We'll talk about this in the morning. Excuse me, I think I'm going to bed now." Bruce exclaimed, the Joker mumbling an agreement, and was quickly in suit of Bruce. Crane looked at Edward and smiled, then threw the covers back over their sweaty bodies and continued were they left off.
XXX
Crane woke up to the smell of fresh beacon and eggs. He looked over to see the bed spot next to him was empty. Were did Edward go? Crane got up, dressed, and strolled out of the room. Were he was hit with an even stronger scent, pancakes. Yum, that had to be better then the shit they called food, at Arkham.
"Good morning." A husky voice said from behind him, a person snaking their arms around Crane's waist. He realized it was Edward and relaxed. "Good morning." Crane purred, putting his hands over Edward's. Edward kissed down Crane's neck, nipping at the collar bone.
Then they heard the snarky voice of the Joker, who was coming down the stairs with Bruce in tow. "God, you two, get a room." Bruce laughed at the Joker's comment, and shoved Crane in the shoulder. Resulting in Edward to stumble on Crane. His chest slamming into Crane's back. Edward hissed, his leg hurt today worse then others. Why did he insist so much on not having a cane? Right, it was wimpy.
Crane and Edward followed the men into the kitchen, smelling of pancakes and eggs and beacon. "Mmm, Eddy, what do you got for me and my little leech today, hmm?" Joker asked, sitting on a chair and putting his hands behind his head. "Jack, I would really appreciate it if you stop calling the baby a 'leech'." Edward said. On account of his tone, Bruce concurred it wasn't the first time the Joker referred to the baby as a leech.
"Oh, but, my dear Edward, it really is a leech. It eats my nutrients and health all up, don't you think?" Joker asked. Today was going to be one of those days when the Joker was going to be unpleasant. Usually he cared for the baby, sometimes he found it a nuisance.
Bruce frowned. "I thought you loved the baby, Jack?" Jack looked at Bruce and smiled. "Yea, it's cool that I'm the first real pregnant man and all, but, damn, being pregnant is hard. You eat, and the baby takes it, I'm peeing every five minutes. Hell, I can't even have booze anymore." The Joker balanced his chair on two legs. Edward wincing as Jack balanced, close to falling.
"Jack... Do you really love the baby, or the concept of the baby?" Crane interjected. Joker rolled his eye- "Please, Johnny, don't try and psychoanalyze my brian. You, of all people, should know it can't be done. Your little asylum tried."
Crane frowned, while Edward dished up breakfast. Crane stabbing into the amazing pancakes. "Jack, what I mean is, the concept of being different from probably anyone in the entire world. This concept can cloud the human mind, to where the ego becomes so big, you could build monuments."
"Please, spare me, Crane. I really do love my baby, really. It means everything to me. I'm sorry I can act like I don't love it, but it's hard to be so different, when everyone else is normal."
Just then, Bruce chocked on his beacon, laughing so hard. "What's so funny, Bruce?" Jack asked, narrowing his green eyes. Bruce cleared his throught. "Us, normal? Now, look at us. We have a mass murdering clown, a killer riddle machine, a scrawny ex physicatrist who thinks he is a gardening tool, and a billionaire playboy" He remembered, Edward didn't know about the Batman yet.
"We are not exactly the most normal bunch of lovers on this side of the world." Bruce finished. The Joker looked at him, and finally cracked a small smile. "I guess your right. We are normal in the world of strange."
The rest of the breakfast was eaten in a comfortable silence. Crane and Edward doing the dishes, while Bruce and Jack watched T.V. They watched the news as some information of Gotham came on. "We have been informed that Gotham police have potentially become aware of the whereabouts of Dr. Jonathan Crane, billionaire Bruce Wayne, and the mass murdering clown The Joker.-" All four breaths hitched. This could not be.
"-They are said to be hiding out in an old wear house outside of Gotham-" The news castor reported. All men sighed in contempt. Bruce rubbed Jack's belly and kissed his temple. "When are we going to find out the sex of the baby, Jack?"
Jack sighed. "We might not, if the doctors refuse to treat me. I won't be able to know until the baby is born..." Jack sighed. Bruce kissed his lover. "Don't worry, I'll will make them treat you and our little leech." Bruce said. Edward cringed when washing a dish, which resulted in it cracking in his vice grip. 'Leech'?! God, that was apt to be the baby's name. God, no, please!
Bruce and Jack quietly watched T.V, as Edward and Crane joined them. As all four men were sitting there, the power went out. Resulting in pitch black darkness. Then they heard Crane scream, shriek actually. Edward looked over to Crane, but all he saw was darkness-
"JC!"
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A/N: Suspense. I love it. I might be the master of it. No, I make people cry. Well, that's what I did to this poor kid in my english class. I did my Joker impression for him, and he blubbered like a whale. He was scared out of his wits end. I did the dialogue from when Heath was Nurse Joker. And I walked up to the kids face and was like "Nobody panics when things go according to plaaan." And the kid got all shaky and started to cry. It was bad.
