PIE IS A PART OF LIFE, PEOPLE. EMBRACE THE PIE.

*clears throat* That being said, there will be no more pie... in this chapter, anyway. There might be some more pie later on. *smirks*


#9. Sing in Front of an Audience


Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes

How do you measure the life of a woman or a man?


"Elphaba."

The fact that Galinda was using her full name already told the green girl that something had to be seriously wrong. She glanced up from her book, furrowing her brow in confusion when she saw her roommate holding a piece of paper she recognised as her things-to-do-before-I-die-list. "What?"

Galinda tapped the paper with a perfectly-manicured nail, the expression on her face something between excitement, mild hurt, and shock. "When did this happen?"

Elphaba squinted at the paper, but her friend was standing too far away. Feeling too drained and tired to get up and see for herself, she asked, "To what are you referring, exactly?"

"This. The tiny little check mark beside a certain item on your list indicating that you have already experienced said item."

Elphaba blinked and she had to think for a while before it finally dawned on her. She grimaced. "Um..."

Galinda squealed. "Oh. My. Oz. You and Fiyero...? Really? Because I was looking through your list and I saw "Make love" ticked off, and I was almost entirely certain that you'd accidentally ticked off the wrong thing but... but... you actually did it, didn't you? When?" Her eyes widened. "Wait. Was it when you were in the Vinkus with him? Last Lurlinemas? Elphaba? It better not have been – that was six weeks ago!"

"Seven, actually," Elphaba muttered, cringing a little in anticipation, and her friend didn't disappoint.

"Oh. My. Oz!" she screeched again, even louder this time. "I want to know all the details! Why didn't you tell me?!"

Elphaba glanced up at the blonde through her eyelashes. "Because you'd start squealing and screeching in my ear and ask for details," she replied drily and Galinda crossed her arms and glowered.

"But yes," the raven-haired witch continued. "It was then. The first time, anyway." She blushed and Galinda squealed again.

"Okay, okay, I promise I won't ask for details," she said. "I just want to know... was it nice? He wasn't... pushy or anything, was he? You did want it?"

"I did," Elphaba assured her friend. "He was very sweet, as always. And of course it was nice. Do you think it would have happened more than once if it wasn't nice?"

The blonde girl beamed at her. "This is wonderful!"

"Please don't confront Fiyero," Elphaba almost begged.

Galinda rolled her eyes. "How much of a blabbermouth do you think I am?" she asked a little indignantly. When her roommate just raised an eyebrow at her, she relented. "Okay, fine, I'm a blabbermouth. But I promise I won't tell him. You're right, this is between you two. I'm glad you got to experience it, though," she added and Elphaba smiled softly.

"Me, too."

"This list was a really good idea, wasn't it?" Galinda sighed happily. "You've done so many things already! Okay, let's see if we can stripe off something else, shall we?" She studied the list, pursing her lips in concentration as she went through every item. Then her eyes brightened. "That's it! This one is next!"

"Which one?" Elphaba asked warily.

Galinda just giggled at her. "You'll see!" she sang. She leapt to her feet. "I should go – I'm meeting the girls in a few minutes – but we're going to have dinner together tonight, Elphie. All of us, I mean – you, me, Fiyero, Boq, Nessa... it'll be fun. I'll be back in time to help you prepare!" With that, she dashed out of the door.

Elphaba sighed wearily and lay back down, closing her eyes for a moment. She really did love her blonde friend, but sometimes Galinda was simply and utterly exhausting.


That night, Galinda dragged them all to a newly opened restaurant in town. She forced Elphaba to dress up, putting some make-up in her and making her look, in Elphaba's own words, "sort of pretty, I suppose". She was wearing a sapphire blue dress with tights and a cardigan underneath her winter coat against the cold and Galinda had kept her friend's half-long hair out of her face with a blue hair band. When the two arrived at the restaurant and Fiyero saw her, a smile spread across his face that made her blush. She ignored the smug look her roommate sent in her direction and held her head up high as she sat down next to the prince, although her blush deepened when he took her hand and murmured, "You look so beautiful."

"So why did you insist on this restaurant, Galinda?" Boq asked once they'd finished eating, a while later, and were having a cup of coffee – or tea, in the girls' case.

The blonde beamed at him. "Well, as a matter of fact, Boq, I chose this place for a specific purpose," she declared. Elphaba winced, wondering what to expect; and as if that was his cue, a man stepped onto the stage at the back of the restaurant and asked for people's attention.

"That's why," Galinda said meaningfully, taking a sip of her tea, blue eyes twinkling above her cup. Elphaba was about to ask her friend what she meant when she heard the man on stage mention the word "karaoke" and then her eyes narrowed.

Galinda grinned widely at the green girl, who shook her head stubbornly. "No."

"Elphie," the blonde said, "you've wanted this since you were little and you put it on your list, not me. What happened to making the most of the time you have left and taking leaps of faith and all that?"

Elphaba kept on shaking her head.

"Fabala," Nessarose said quietly, getting her sister's attention. "Do it. You have a wonderful voice and you didn't put it on your list for nothing, did you?"

Elphaba heaved a sigh, glancing from her sister's face to Galinda's and then to the man standing on the stage, inviting the first person to come forward and sing a song. Deciding that her roommate and sister were right – this was yet another case of having nothing left to lose; even if she wasn't ill, her reputation was already ruined, anyway, so this couldn't really hurt – she rose to her feet. "I'll do it," she announced.

The man welcomed her onto the stage and Boq and Fiyero watched her with their mouths agape whilst Galinda giggled and Nessa smiled. The two girls cheered for Elphaba when the music started to play and the dark-haired girl took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment, gathering courage, before opening her eyes again and starting to sing.

She did have a nice voice, she knew that – not amazing, but nice; and as she sang, her nerves seemed to melt away from her. She found Nessa in the crowd, who looked proud even as she wiped away a few tears. She then glanced at Galinda, who was also crying and still cheering at the same time; and Boq, who just seemed in complete awe – at the fact that she could sing or the fact that she had actually dared to step up here and do this, she wasn't sure. Finally, her eyes found Fiyero's bright blue ones, filled with love and pride and so many other things she could not name, and she couldn't help but smile at him.

She sang her heart out because this was the first and the last time she would ever get to do so and when it was over, everyone present in the restaurant applauded and cheered. Boq whistled on his fingers and she blushed a dark shade of red, curtseying awkwardly before hurrying off the stage and flinging herself back into her seat, her cheeks burning. "Are you happy now?" she hissed at Nessa and Galinda, pretending to be annoyed even though she had actually secretly enjoyed it.

"Yes," Galinda said smugly. "Very." Then she squealed and threw her arms around her friend. "Oh, Elphie, that was beautiful! You were amazing up there!"

"You really were," Fiyero agreed, earning himself a brilliant smile from his girlfriend. She smiled at him and he drew her closer to kiss her gently.

She leaned against him, the adrenaline fading to leave a severe case of dizziness in its wake, but she did not even care that much. For a moment, she closed her eyes and just let herself enjoy the moment.

She was pulled out of her daze by Fiyero slipping her a paper towel. At her questioning look, he mumbled, "Nosebleed" and she quickly pressed the paper towel against her nose, sighing inwardly. No matter how hard she had been trying to ignore it, she knew her symptoms were getting worse. Both Fiyero and Galinda had noticed and urged her to see her doctor here at Shiz, but she hadn't done so yet. She pretended that she kept forgetting; she even pretended to be annoyed at their concern, brushing them off with a simple, "I'm fine", but she knew the real reason why she hadn't visited the infirmary yet.

She was afraid. Elphaba Thropp was afraid. Scared to death, actually – no pun intended – because she knew that her symptoms worsening could only mean one thing and she didn't want to hear her doctor say it. She didn't want to hear that her prognosis had changed again, that she had less time than she'd thought, that she would probably not even see another Lurlinemas.

Fiyero, however, must be reading her mind, because he whispered in her ear, "Fae, I really think you should go to the infirmary tomorrow for a check-up. I'll go with you," he offered, but she shook her head.

"I'll go," she said, pulling away the paper towel for a moment, only to press it back against her nose when she realised there was still blood dripping from it. "But I don't want you to miss your classes to come with me." Translation: she didn't want him to hear she'd been getting worse. She knew she'd have to tell him sooner or later, anyway, but she wanted to tell him herself, not have him hear it from a doctor. "I'll be fine on my own."

"Someone should go with you," he insisted and Galinda, overhearing, said firmly, "I'll take her. I don't have any morning classes tomorrow, anyway."

Fiyero flashed her a grateful smile. "Thanks, Galinda."

"Glin," Elphaba began, but a look from her roommate shut her up and simultaneously told her that Galinda knew exactly why she didn't want Fiyero to come. She sighed and reluctantly accepted. "Thank you."

They walked back to Shiz not long thereafter, since Elphaba had grown weary and Nessarose was starting to tire as well. Fiyero kept his arm around his girlfriend and she was leaning into him, grateful for the body heat he provided. She was shivering, but he didn't even ask if she was okay anymore – he'd done that every time she'd shivered in the beginning, but she'd thoroughly explained to him at some point that her illness caused her to almost always be freezing, so yes, she was fine, just cold, and he'd stopped asking her because he knew it bothered her. Instead, he silently offered her his own coat despite her protests, draping it across her shoulders and drawing her closer into his side. He kept on rubbing her arms until they had reached her dorm building, by which time she was actually feeling a little warmer, but he was freezing.

She smirked up at him. "Regret giving away your coat?" she teased, taking it off and reaching up to put it around his own shoulders again.

His teeth were chattering and his lips were blue, but he managed a smile nonetheless. "To you? Never." He waited for a moment as Galinda, Boq, and Nessa tactfully moved around the corner and then his smile turned into an mischievous grin. "I know of another way to get warm quickly."

"Mmh." She wrapped her arms around his waist and looked up at him. "And what might that way be?" she asked impishly, tucking her cold hands against his bare back underneath his shirt. He gasped, which made her smirk again, but the smirk quickly faded when he leaned down to kiss her completely breathless within a few moments, wrapping his arms and his coat around her so that she was engulfed in his body heat. She sighed happily and pressed her cheek against his chest, closing her eyes for a moment. "Can I just stay here forever? I haven't been this warm in weeks."

He chuckled softly. "If it were up to me, you could," he said, resting his chin on the top of her head. They stood that way for a while before she reluctantly detached herself from him.

"I should go up," she said apologetically, "and you should go back to your own room to get warm."

He sighed. "Yeah. Probably." He kissed her again. "You'll be coming to class tomorrow after you return from the infirmary, right?" he asked. "You'll tell me how it went then?"

She tensed instantly, but knew she had no other choice. "Okay," she said quietly. She looked up at him, wanting to warn him in advance. "Just... just don't be too upset when it's bad news," she said, biting her lip as she met his gaze. "My symptoms worsening can hardly be a good thing and it's not like they can do anything to cure me. I want you to prepare yourself for that."

He looked unhappy about it, but he nodded without comment, which told her he must have thought about this already and had probably come to the same conclusion – that it would never be good news. He reached up as if he wanted to touch her cheek, but then dropped his hand again and lowered his gaze.

"I know," he said, his breath fogging in the cold air. "But I still want to know, no matter how bad the news is. I know you want to protect me, but just... just don't. Can you promise me that?"

She nodded. "Okay."

He nodded again, too, and hesitated for a moment. Then he leaned in and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Sweet dreams."

"'Night, Yero." She watched him as he turned and walked away, Boq and Nessa following behind, and then went inside with Galinda, ignoring the blonde's questioning looks.


He knew she was getting worse. He'd known for a while already. Ever since their holiday in the Vinkus together, he'd noticed that she seemed to be getting nosebleeds and bleeding gums more often, that she almost always looked pale, and that she'd taken to napping every afternoon because she was so tired all the time. He could tell when she was feeling faint or dizzy and that seemed to be happening a lot lately. He'd forced himself to face that truth and to not make himself any illusions about what her doctor at the infirmary was going to say.

Despite all that, however, he still felt like he couldn't breathe for a moment when she slipped into the seat next to him before their second class of the day and said quietly, without beating around the bush, "It's not good, Yero."

The lump in his throat made it impossible for him to speak and the professor was silencing the class to begin his lecture, anyway; so he just swallowed and nodded, taking her hand and squeezing it tightly. She gave him a sad smile and squeezed back before focusing on her notes again. For the remainder of the entire class, she kept their fingers entwined, taking notes only with her free hand.

When it was over, she still held on to his hand and led him out of the building and over to the library, taking him to the fireplace in the far corner where she always loved to study. She sat down on the couch there, staring into the fire as he sank down next to her and she tried to think of what to tell him.

"There's not much they can do," she said finally, her gaze still trained on the fire. "Or... well, nothing, really. I'm already taking as much medication as I can – if I take any more, it would only increase the chances of... of me dying. Dangerous side effects, and stuff. But... it's definitely getting worse." She swallowed, but her mouth was still dry, even as her eyes stung with tears.

He took a deep breath. "How long?" he asked, his voice surprisingly steady, and she shook her head.

"I'm not sure," she said. "Like I said, they don't really like giving numbers, but... but he implied that we're definitely thinking months now, not years." She finally looked up to meet his gaze and he was a little stunned to see her eyes filled with tears threatening to spill over. He wasn't sure if he'd ever seen her cry before; he had certainly never seen her cry over her illness. She'd always seemed so casual about it, but he understood now that that had all been a facade. She pretended it didn't matter to her, just like she pretended that people's comments about her skin didn't bother her; but they did bother her and this did matter. She just refused to acknowledge it because that made it easier for her to handle.

And so he bit back his own tears and pulled her into his arms, guiding her head to rest on his shoulder as he felt her wet tears already on his neck. She was shaking and she sniffled, her voice breaking when she whispered, "Yero, I just want you to know that I… I'm glad my last Lurlinemas was with you."

Then he could no longer hold back his own tears. They both cried, holding on to one another for dear life as if that could prevent Elphaba from going anywhere.


Now if you really want to stir up the feels, you should look up the song "Seasons of Love" from RENT on YouTube and listen to that.

If you're crying, please do let me know so I can be mean and cackle about it. If not, also please let me know so I can see if I manage to change that in later chapters.