Well guys, I have to slow down the updates. Mostly because school is my top priority along with work. Quitting smoking is going well, haven't had a cigarette or a cigar in awhile. Cut down on my drinking to one cheat day a weak. Now I just need to cut out sugary junk food from my diet.
AT THE HOUSE
"Wow, these Hatfields are dickheads..." Yang said.
"I don't know, the Mccoys seem to be big jerks too..." Ruby said.
JC had put on Hatfields and Mccoys, he personally liked westerns, and the show was technically based on History. Which made it even better. Granted he didn't know how many details weren't included, or were changed. But it seemed to be pretty good so far. Blake struggled with watching it at first. She couldn't understand how the humans in the beginning could be killing each other, and over what? Some sort of Civil War?
According to JC, it was fought over a disagreement of land, government vs state rights. And of course, the issue of Slavery. Never in her life had Blake ever heard of humans owning other humans as slaves. But when she had access to a computer, she realized that this was a dark world.
The barbary slave trade...the irish slave trade...slaves taken by turks during conquest of europe...the african slave trade.
Sure they did have slavery in their world, but it was mostly human's selling Faunus. This, this really gave her the chills. To be honest, she felt scared. Especially when she came across a group she wished she had never learned about...
The Nazis.
JC had turned off the computer the moment she found that. He said there was enough depressing things in the world without having to bring up shit from the past. He may have loved history, but they had to stop acting like they were still living in the past. Something a lot of people seemed to forget.
"Hey JC, can I go on this site?" Nora asked.
"What's it called?" He asked as he was cooking chicken breast on his George Forman.
"Something called Tumb-" She started.
"NO! DO NOT GO THERE!" He yelled as everyone was slightly startled.
"Why?" Weiss asked wondering why he freaked out.
"It's populated by the darkest, vilest, and most disgusting creatures on the face of the earth..." He said in a dark tone.
"Grimm?" Blake suggested.
"No, Social Justice Warriors." He said.
"What are-" Weiss asked.
"Trust me, you don't want to know." He said as no one needed to be exposed to them.
"So, does this Mulan person seem familiar to you?" Ren said as Nora had put on a disney movie.
She apparently really loved Disney, considering she asked to borrow JC's tablet so she could watch them on Netflix.
"I don't know, but she does seem familiar." She said as she looked at Ren.
Then at Mulan.
Back to Ren.
Back to Mulan.
Back to Ren.
"Nah, it's probably nothing." She said to herself.
Pyrrha and Jaune were sitting closer on one of the couches. JC was smirking and giving Nora a thumbs up. Indicating that Operation Arkos was going smoothly.
"Oh hey! This looks like fun!" Ruby said as she put on a tv show that JC didn't bother to look at.
"Oh look at the cute little animals!" Ruby said as Weiss was sitting next to her.
"I agree, they look positively adorable!" Weiss said as they were watching what appeared to be two tiny woodland critters operating a lemonade stand.
"Why are they focusing on the knife cutting through the lemon?" Ruby asked as she tilted her head.
"Wait a second...Woodland creatures with a lemonade stand? Sharp knife? That sounds like...OH SHIT!" JC turned around, but he was too late.
A nail fell onto the screen, just as the lemonade stand sign fell from its perch and ripped the face off of one of the creatures.
"AAHHHHHHHHHH!" The creature screamed in agony.
"AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Ruby and Weiss screamed as they hugged each other.
"Fucking happy tree friends..." JC said as he should have been supervising them.
The other woodland creature freaked out and spit Lemonade on the open face wound. Only for it to burn the little creature even more, prolonging its agony.
"WHAT IS THIS ABSOLUTE MONSTROSITY?!" Weiss yelled at JC.
"Uhm...yeah, next time, you might not want to click on something without reading the description." He said as Blake was now watching the screen.
Only for the sign to break off again and crush the skull of the blue skunk creature, and its eyeball to fall out of its socket.
"WHAT IN THE?!" She yelled out.
"DUDE?! WHAT KIND OF SHIT DO YOU PEOPLE WATCH?!" Yang yelled as JC turned off that show.
"Okay guys, first off, let's calm down, what you just saw...is a show made up from the minds of some sick bastards who have been tricking parents into watching a gory show with their kids...lets just let it go." He said as he really didn't want to explain it.
After all, it was still pretty fucked up that they had a show featuring cute little animals being murdered in absolutely horrifying ways. The worst part was that it was sometimes funny.
"Okay, lets just put something else on..." He said as he put it on random.
Only for a video of a prostitute coming up from sucking a dwarf's cock.
"WHAT THE HELL?!" Yang said as she covered Ruby's eyes.
"Oh that reminds me, I need to catch up on game of thrones." He said as he remembered this was the first episode of season 1.
"Wait! Go back!" Blake said as she wanted to hear the story behind that.
"EW! NO!" Yang said as she pressed a button that changed the show again.
"SPARTANS! TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL!" Yang saw a gorgeous bearded man in a leather speedo wearing a cape and shield.
"Hubba Hubba!" She said as she felt very excited all of a sudden.
"Hey those guys kind of remind me of your weapons!" Jaune said to Pyrrha.
"A little.." She said as the sword and shield definately looked similar to her weapons.
"Change it!" Nora said as she got bored.
"Alright...Alright...Alright..." They heard a voice say as JC freaked out.
"Ohmygod! Its' Matthew Mcconaughey!" He said as he freaked out like a teen girl...
What? Matthew Mcconaughey is fucking gorgeous!
"Okay dude, seriously, I may have been freaking out over epic beard guy, but you freaking out over this Mcconaughey guy is creepy." Yang said as she looked at him.
"Just because he has nice hair, a perfect jawline, those...deep eyes...that perfect muscle tone, tight ass...what the hell is happening to me?!" Yang said as she was dazed and confused.
"Oh please, stop drooling over him, just because he looks absolutely gorgeous, especially with that...sexy accent, and just absolutely breathtaking smile...WHAT THE HELL?!" Weiss had to snap out of a daze.
"Don't mess with the Mcconaughey..." JC said as nobody could resist him.
It was like trying to say the Mona Lisa wasn't a work of art...you couldn't say it.
"Yang...he's making me feel something..." Ruby said as she couldn't help but stare at him.
"Alright...Alright...Alright..." Mcconaughey said on screen as Ruby felt shivers go through her body.
"OKAY THATS IT!" Yang said as she turned off the tv.
"Hey!" Blake said as she was trying to get a good look.
All she got was a glimpse of the Mcconaughey, and it left her wanting more.
"Listen Blakey! If that guy was enough to make Ruby feel something, we're in serious uncharted territory here!" Yang said as JC looked at Ruby in shock.
"I always thought she was asexual or something..." JC said as he could never imagine her being with anyone on the show.
Sure some people shipped Lancaster, but he always got the feeling Jaune and Ruby were more like the adorkable best friends rather than lovers.
"But I didn't even get a good look!" Blake whined, she wanted more!
She had already read all the smut in the house, she needed a fix!
Nora was completely unaffected by the gorgeous hunk of man meat on the screen, mostly because she instead focused on the hunk of man meat that was Ren. And as luck would have it, the accent saying 'alright, alright, alright' while paired with her staring at Ren deeply in the eyes, had acted somewhat as a conduit for her love, almost as if they had awakened feelings that they didn't even know they had.
"Hmmm..." Jaune wanted to try something.
"Hey Pyrrha." He said as she looked at him.
Their faces were close together, one was waiting for the other to make a move, hoping that the other one wouldn't reject them. Jaune felt awkward, he needed to do something to break the awkward silence. But what?
"Uh...Alright...Alright...Alright?" He said trying to imitate the sexy, sexy man on the tv.
"*giggles* Oh Jaune, thats so adorable." She said as she hugged him close.
"Holy crap, Thank you sexy man on the TV!" Jaune said as Pyrrha was cuddling him.
Meanwhile the author was wondering why he was rushing their relationship so fast...well the truth of the matter was, because he wanted to, and because the only thing waiting did for him, was give him a ten second kiss scene for Arkos, only for it to be ripped away minutes later. So it was his way of trying to change the past.
That and because the Mcconaughey fixes everything.
After calming themselves down. They decided not to watch the TV anymore.
"So...what now?" JC said as he saw Blake was using a tablet.
"What are you doing with that?" He said as Blake hid the screen from him.
"Nothing!" She said as he took it out of her hands.
Only for a massive blush to envelop his face, and to give it back to her.
"You...You need help..." He said as he walked away.
He knew that the fandom generally accepted Blake as being a smut addict. But who would have thought that she would have been reading erotica on his tablet. Even worse yet, the fact that she might have used his credit card to pay for some of that erotica.
Great, that would be a fun way to explain his credit card bill if anyone ever saw it.
"Is there a workshop I can use?" Ruby asked.
"There's a small area of the garage next to my truck with some tool and scrap steel, knock yourself out." He said as she ran downstairs.
"Got a punching bag?" Yang asked.
"Old ratty one underneath the deck." He said as Yang shrugged and decided that was better than nothing.
"Any good movies for Pyrrha and I to watch?" Jaune said hoping he would catch the hint.
"Please recommend a good romantic movie." Was Jaune's underlaying message.
"Yeah sure, tons on my dvd shelf, or you can look at the collection on top of the cupboard." JC said.
"Yep, but if you want a romantic one, I put them on top of the cupboard, that way I always know where they are, if I need to pretend I'm a romantic." Was the underlying message.
"Thanks, I'll check them out." Jaune said with a smile.
"Thanks Bro, Bro code!" He said with a slight tap of his fist to the chest.
"Yeah, no problem, now if you excuse me, I have to go work on homework." He said as he also did a slight tap to his chest.
"Bro code for life." JC said with a peace sign.
Honestly there was no point to writing that scene, I just needed something to make the chapter longer. Besides this is mostly filler anyways.
"So what are we going to do now?" Nora said as they were getting bored in the house.
"Well...I have to go home tomorrow..." He said as he couldn't believe he was going to day this.
"And I think I'll have to bring you with." He said as everyone else who was still in the room became very attentive.
"What?" Ren asked.
"Well, I can't leave you here by yourselves! Especially with Nora being a ticking time bomb of energy!" He said as Nora tried to deny it, but she couldn't.
"As much as I don't want to...I think I should take you all home...to meet the folks..."
Oh he was going to regret this.
