It was still late when Bastila woke, and absently reached out for Revan. Discovering his side of the bed empty and cold, she frowned and sat up. She dressed and walked into the main room of the apartment and leaned against the wall.

Revan sat cross legged meditating in the center of the floor, clad only in a loose fitting pair of dark grey pants. Bastila moved over to sit down in front of him, and waited. After a moment, he opened his eyes.

"Sorry, I couldn't sleep."

She reached over and took his hand in hers. "I figured as much. You seemed rather upset and deeply troubled after we got home."

Revan sighed. "That's actually an understatement. I nearly lost control and snapped several times yesterday."

He stood up and walked over to look out the window. Bastila watched him for a moment before she moved to stand beside him. She gently ran her hand across his shoulders, and felt the knots of tension in his muscles.

"Feel like talking about it yet?"

He shook his head. "No."

She tilted her head and studied him, concern showing in her eyes. "Alright."

Revan lowered his head, and then glanced sideways at her. "I don't want to talk about it, I don't want to remember it, but you deserve an explanation."

He turned and hugged her tightly before crossing the room to settle down on the sofa. He ran his fingers through his shaggy mane of hair and then looked over at her.

"I know a few times over the years you've made mention of how I never talked about my childhood."

Bastila nodded and sat down beside him.

He took a deep breath. "I never talked about it because my childhood wasn't something I wanted to remember. It wasn't something I was very proud of, and figured it was better to just bury it and try to forget. Unfortunately there are some things that can't truly be forgotten, no matter how hard I try." He glanced over at her. "I was born a slave. I was taken from my mother soon after my first year, and I was sold twelve times by the time I was found here on Coruscant in the slave markets by a Jedi Master. I was nine."

She felt the rolling tempest of his emotions rippling through their bond and gently squeezed his hand. "That means you'd only been in the Order a year before we met."

He nodded. "I never talked about my past, knowing how most people viewed slaves. The master who found me, and the Council who approved my staying for training are the only ones who ever knew the truth of my childhood. None of the records about me in the archives mention anything about my life before I started training."

He leaned forward, propping his elbows on his knees and rested his head against his hands. Bastila wrapped her arms around him, gently resting her head against his shoulder.

"I'm so sorry, Revan. I can't even imagine..."

Revan leaned into her comforting touch. "No, and trust me, you don't even want to imagine it. It was a constant, never ending, eight year long nightmare." He sighed. "I had nightmares from it long after I joined the Order. It wasn't until I was almost fifteen before I finally was able to bury it deep enough that I could sleep without them plaguing me."

She reached up and kissed his cheek. "I'm also sorry that you had to go through that alone, that you didn't feel you could trust me or anyone else."

He shifted to slip one arm around her. "My heart trusted you, Bastila. It was my fool's pride and stubborn mind that didn't want to." He exhaled sharply. "There's also one thing that I never told any of the masters, because I was afraid that if they knew, I might have been sent back where they found me."

She looked up at him. "Oh? What?"

Revan took a deep breath. "When I was eight, I learned that I was quite capable of killing someone without the least shred of remorse or hesitation."

Bastila frowned, trying to imagine what horror could have driven an eight year old to murder. Remembering her own rather sheltered childhood, it was almost unfathomable what he must have suffered through.

"I'm fairly certain that if you did, it was entirely justified."

He nodded, his expression turning grim. "Oh, it was. Not that I liked Hutts before him, but that master was the most despicable abomination of a Hutt imaginable. I had other Hutt masters, but that one was the worst by far. He was insanely sadistic, and delighted in making his slaves suffer. I disappointed him because I refused to cry or scream, no matter what he did to me. It drove him mad, because he actually enjoyed hearing his slaves scream when tortured or punished. He even made a point of having his slaves kept where they could easily see and hear what he had done to others."

He shook his head. "Last night, I almost lost it at the slave market when they were branding the one slave. It was largely because of the memories brought back to me of the six months I was owned by that Hutt." He glanced over at her. "Most masters tended to brand their slaves, as a matter of identifying ownership. That Hutt used it as much as another means of torture as anything else. There was a young Twi'lek girl who had been brought before him. She couldn't have been more than a year older than me, if that. Because he found her screams so enjoyable, he had her branded eight times in a row. He only stopped then because she passed out from the pain. The worst atrocities though were what awaited any slave he found to be virgin. In the six months I was there, he found seven that were, only one survived what he had done to them. As I recall, there were at least twenty slaves in all who died during that time."

He growled under his breath and leaned back against the sofa. "Heh, it's ironic that for the first time in my life up to that point, I actually came to appreciate the fact that I wasn't."

Bastila looked at him, eyes widening, and she felt sick as her stomach tightened.. "But you were only..."

He cut her off. "Bastila, age doesn't matter when you're dealing with the twisted perversions and sadistic nature of slave owners. But now you know why I hate Hutts so much, and also why I hate Zeltrons. That one that stopped us yesterday had no clue how close he came to dying. If you hadn't been there to stop him from touching me more than he did, and for me to draw on the comfort of your presence, I would have ended up killing him."

"I gather you had a Zeltron master at one point?"

He nodded, "Two of them. I had five Hutt masters, two Zeltrons, one Twi'lek, one Duro, and the rest were humans, or so they called themselves."

She frowned, "Well, it does explain a lot of things about you."

He tilted his head, "Oh it does, does it?"

She nodded, "At least a few of your quirks are more understandable now. But you said you'd killed that Hutt master?"

Revan nodded, "I did."

"What happened?"

"He had me brought before him to have me beaten again, trying to get some reaction out of me. I pretended to pass out from the beating. While I laid there, I heard him laughing with his head torturer, a wretched beast of a Nikto, about having a plan to finally break me once and for all. However, since I'd passed out on him, he was going to wait until the next day so I'd be fully awake and aware of it. When I heard what he had planned, I had no intention of letting that happen, so I started thinking and searching for a way to get out of it. I may have only been all of eight years old but I was quite fond of and rather attached to all my parts and pieces and had no desire to lose anything."

She arched one eyebrow at him, catching the rippled echoes of his thoughts through their bond and he nodded.

"Are you...?" She caught herself and shook her head, "Of course you're serious. I'm sorry, I'm just astounded at the atrocities you were faced with and to be so young." She gently squeezed his hand. "So what did you do?"

"I started studying the cage I was kept in, and realized that since he had been starving me I could actually squeeze through the bars. I waited until late at night when everyone was asleep, and then snuck out of my cage and found my way to the kitchen where his meals were prepared. I found enough things that I hoped would be toxic to a Hutt around and I added them to his food. Once I was done I realized that if I tried to stay out of my cage, and it was discovered, he would get upset and not eat his morning meal. So I had to sneak back and return to the cage. Then all I could do was wait and pray that what I'd put in his food would be enough to poison him." He chuckled, "It turned out to be likely a bit of overkill, but as I said, I had no remorse or regrets for killing him. My only regret was that I didn't do it sooner. It worked, and with him dead, all the remaining slaves, myself included where divided up and sold off."

She nodded and leaned against him. She was quiet for a moment and he slipped his arm around her and nuzzled her.

"You've got questions. I can feel them, so go ahead and ask."

She sighed, "I'm just thinking how we could have been so close as kids and I was totally oblivious to what you were dealing with. I had no idea." She turned and looked at him. "You said most of the masters branded slaves?"

His jaws tightened, but he nodded. "Yes, I had several brands by the time I was found by the Jedi."

"How is it possible that I never noticed? I mean, considering how much time we spent together and what we shared before you left for the Mandalorian wars..."

He chuckled, "That was actually a combination of careful camouflage and learning to create illusions with the Force. I had already learned to control my eye color, so it was just a more complex trick to conceal the brands that were not usually hidden by my clothing." He grinned at her. "You actually caused me several panic attacks that I somehow managed to control quick enough for you not to notice."

She tilted her head, "I did? How?"

"Remember the times you'd come rushing into my room because you were upset over one thing or another? And a few times when you did, I happened to be in the middle of changing clothes. I would panic, feeling certain that you'd spot something and feeling terrified of how I'd explain it if you asked about it."

Bastila blushed as she remembered. "Oh, I think when I realized you weren't dressed, I was far too busy being embarrassed to notice anything else."

He laughed. "Well, I assure you that my desire to keep my clothes on around you was never due to modesty. I just didn't want you to know I'd been a slave."

She sighed, "I have often wondered if you ever had even a shred of modesty. I guess not? And do you really think it would have changed how I felt about you?"

He shrugged, "Like I said, my heart knew better, but I was too proud and stubborn, and let myself worry about it too much. You were the only girl I was ever truly interested in, so I didn't want to risk losing you because of my past. As for modesty... growing up a slave, I wasn't allowed the luxury. I was never permitted to have clothes, so realized early on that there was no point being modest about anything."

"Ha! So that explains why you still prefer to run around nearly naked, hm?"

He grinned, "Partly. It's just more comfortable that way, besides, I never hear you complaining."

She sat back up and swatted his shoulder. "You are also completely shameless."

He chuckled. "Naturally. I am a Sith Lord after all."

"Well, to be honest, Revan, understanding your past doesn't change how I feel about you, if anything it just makes me love and admire you even more."

"Really?"

She nodded, "Really. I mean think about it. Looking at the horrors and atrocities you faced, the things you suffered at such a young age, alone. You not only survived it, you overcame it. You took the courage and strength from it and used it. You didn't let it destroy you, and you didn't let it define you. I'm glad you were finally able to tell me about this, because it truly does help me understand you so much more. I'm truly very proud of you, to achieve what you have, despite what you went through as a child." She leaned over and hugged him tightly. "Besides that, I seriously meant every word of the vows I made to you."

He smiled, and kissed her. "So did I, love."

"So what happened to the brands, since I gather you found a solution other than illusions?"

He nodded, "That was a favor from Ethan, in part for rescuing him and Corin from the Republic. I'd already gathered a fair collection of scars in the war, so what's a few others. We'd grown to trust each other quite well by then."

"What do you mean 'rescue them from the Republic'?"

He leaned back, putting his hands behind his head. "I suppose I should go back a bit to explain. Ethan and Corin were both serving on the same ship I served on when I first joined the Republic in the Mandalorian war. After I was made a general, that ship became my flagship and I was given command of about a third of the fleet. During the time we served together we learned that we got along well and we could trust each other. We'd often spend time just talking as friends during down times. After Malachor V, they both received new transfer orders, sending them to separate ships. They both knew I was planning to leave the Republic, with anyone who wanted to join me. So they came to me and explained what was going on, and asked if I would allow them to continue serving together on my flagship."

He looked over at her, and smiled. "So of course, I said they could stay. I told them that as long as they did their jobs I couldn't care less what they did in private on their own time, and I've never had any complaints about their work. Both are extremely diligent and professional when they're working, so it never mattered to me if they enjoyed each others company when they were off duty."

Bastila tilted her head as she looked at him, eyes widening slightly as she thought about what he'd said. "They're...?

He nodded and chuckled. "You never wondered about how close they are with each other?"

She shook her head, "No, I never really gave it much thought. Though now that I do think about it, some of the things they've both said to me make more sense now."

He grinned, "Oh?"

Bastila nodded. "The first night in fact, after you had been injured in the fight against Malak after I'd joined you. Corin came by with a tray full of food for us since he had heard you'd been injured."

"Yeah, and I'd said Ethan probably told him."

"I don't think I even thought anything of that, but what Corin had told me was that he would rather serve you, even as a Sith Lord, than to serve the Republic because he always knew where he stood with you."

"Ah." He nodded. "Yes, by Republic regulations their relationship was breaking several rules. But I don't care what people do privately, unless it affects their abilities to do their jobs. The Republic lost two people, and I gained the best cook and doctor I could ask for."

"I suppose that also explains Ethan's comment about it being a while since did any shopping for a lady when he'd brought the clothes for us."

Revan chuckled, "True. Though, he actually had been married before he joined the military."

Her eyes widened, "Really?"

"It was one of the things he talked to me about over a couple drinks one night when we were both off duty, before I'd gotten promoted to general. She had left him for someone younger, and he didn't take it well. So he sort of gave up on things and joined the military."

She nodded, "That makes sense. I sort of thought of him as a career military man."

"Yeah, he'd been in for several years before I joined the Republic. He actually got rather good at playing the impartial doctor. That time you saw him patching me up was a rare look at how he is when he's being himself. Normally he's much more professional, but he knew I trusted you, so felt he could also trust you and stay relaxed around you."

Bastila smiled, "Well, I'm glad he thought he could trust me. I rather enjoyed watching the two of you arguing."

He laughed, "Our bantering arguments would probably scare anyone else, with how often I threaten him, but we both know its only idle threats. He's quite right about being the only doctor I'd trust, so even if I didn't like him, I'm stuck with him."

She chuckled, "Guess its a good thing you do like him. So what did you tell that slave that we freed?"

"Oh that." He grinned, "I told him how to find the Admiral, and told him the pass phrase Dural would recognize and that he'd find a place where worthy fighters were valued."

"He believed you?"

Revan shrugged, "Probably. I think he'd have realized he didn't have a reason not to trust me, since you had given him his freedom. Either way, I figured it would be worthwhile to tell him. If he uses it or not, is up to him."

Bastila yawned, "True, at least you gave him a chance. Think you're ready to try sleeping again?"

He stretched and sighed, "Yeah, I think I might be able to now. Thank you."


Revan rose first, and smiled softly as he slid the blanket back up over Bastila. He padded quietly through the apartment and into the kitchen to pour himself a drink. He sighed as he emptied the glass and sat it on the counter. He walked back into the main room, moved a few pieces of furniture out of his way, and began working through his personal regimen of training exercises.

Bastila rolled over and groaned when she found Revan missing again. She sat up, rubbed the sleep out of her eyes and yawned. Shaking her head, she got up and dressed and then headed into the main room. Seeing that Revan was working through his training, she smiled and leaned against the wall to watch. She couldn't help but still admire the fluid grace and efficiency of his movements. Even without the Force, his form was flawless, and there was no wasted motion. She recognized the familiar steps of the basic lightsaber forms. It peaked her interest when he shifted into more advanced forms, some she didn't recognize.

She stepped forward, catching his eye finally as he turned. He paused in mid step and smiled.

"Good morning. Care to join me?"

"Sure, what are you doing? I recognized some of the forms, but not all of the ones you're going through."

Revan chuckled, "Those would be ones I learned from the Sith while I was in the Unknown Regions. I can either skip them or teach you if you wish."

She nodded, "Not sure why it didn't occur to me that the Sith would develop their own forms. Single saber?"

He shook his head, "Only one is single, most are duel wielding or staff, which might interest you."

She smiled, "I'm always game for improving my staff forms. I could probably use the training since I've been neglecting it since I left the Star Forge."

He nodded, "I'll start with a warm up and then move into the staff forms for you then. I had meant to ask you, were you able to accomplish what you came here for?"

Bastila took up a place beside him but with enough space between them to allow for the movements needed. "Yes, actually I did. Mother passed away soon after I got here, but at least we had enough time to settle things between us."

"I'm sorry she's gone, but I'm glad you were able to get some reconciliation and closure first. That's important."

He started moving again, and she followed. They fell into a comfortable silence as both focused their concentration on their training exercises. By the time Revan had gone through the combinations a fifth time for her, Bastila was beginning to feel her muscles complaining about the break in her own training regimen.

He chuckled as he picked up on it through their bond. "Go through the whole series once more with your saber, and I'll make breakfast for us."

She sighed, but nodded, drawing her saberstaff to her. He watched her, bright golden eyes studying every step and turn she made. For the first time in years, she almost felt like an apprentice under his critical gaze. Bastila forced herself to push through the stiffness trying to settle in her muscles, determined not to make any mistakes in her forms. When she finished, she extinguished her saber and stood facing him, waiting for his appraisal.

He smiled, "Very well done. A little slow on the back slash turn, but other than that, perfect. You could change your saber color too, if you ever want to."

She made a face at him. "I definitely need to get back in a routine of training, I'm feeling it and I shouldn't be, considering we didn't really do that much."

"Practice does help, but don't be too hard on yourself. The Sith forms are more intense and active, using muscles that the Jedi forms don't, so its actually understandable since you're not used to them."

She nodded, "Thank you. So what's for breakfast?"

He chuckled and headed for the kitchen. Bastila put her saber away and followed him.

"I also learned that I have family I didn't know about still on Talravin." She sat down at the table.

Revan gathered the ingredients and dishes for breakfast and started cooking. "Oh? Maybe you should go visit them. It would be a perfect destination after we leave Coruscant."

She frowned slightly, "You think so? I don't really know anything about them other than the little bit my mother was able to tell me before she passed. When were you planning on us leaving here?"

He shrugged, "I think it would be worthwhile to go meet them. As for leaving, I'm pretty much ready any time. I've had enough of Coruscant for one lifetime."

She nodded, "I don't doubt that considering everything. Alright, what's the plan?"

"We've got my shuttle which has long range hyperspace capabilities, contrary to popular belief." He smirked.

Her brows furrowed. "Wasn't it left at the Temple?"

He glanced over at her and grinned, "Of course not. I had HK bring it to the landing pad above us before he left for the rest of his orders after we got out of the Temple."

Bastila laughed. "Well, that simplifies transportation, what's the hyperspace range for it though? I don't think a small shuttle could reach Talravin in one jump from here."

"No, we'll have to slingshot from a halfway point. I'll double check the star map when we're ready to leave. It'll just make us that much harder to track, if anyone was so inclined. I also had HK sweep the shuttle for any trace of tracking devices or tampering to the systems but he didn't find anything."

He dished up their food and carried it over to the table before settling down across from her. She smiled appreciatively and took a bite.

"You really are a good cook, in spite of yourself." She teased.

Revan just made a face and poured himself a drink. "You've just grown used to my cooking is all. Still better with a bit of creative seasoning."

Bastila grimaced. "How can you drink that stuff this early?"

He chuckled, "It's not that early, and I had a glass before I started training too. Besides, I actually like it."

"Ugh." She shook her head.

"Hmph, have you even ever tried it?"

She glared at him, "The way it smells? I don't want to try it."

He laughed. "I suppose it is a bit of an acquired taste."

"Shall I start packing after breakfast?"

He nodded, "Unless there's anything else you need to do here. I finished what I needed done on the trip to the slave markets."

"Alright, there's nothing else I need here. They took my ship, but not before I had a chance to destroy its nav system." She gave him a mischievous grin.

Revan smiled, "Introduced it to your lightsaber a few times did you? Bet they weren't happy about that, not being able to back track your route."

"Yeah, I made sure there wasn't anything left they could piece together. I figured if they got me, I wasn't going to hand them you, or at least I had hoped..." She frowned.

He reached over and took her hand, "You didn't hand me to them. I gave myself up, don't keep blaming yourself for that. I told you, it'll still all work out. Just trust me."

She sighed, and squeezed his hand. "I hope you're right, love. I just wish the outcome had been more acceptable."

He chuckled, "Hey, I have a plan. Don't count me out so easily." He winked at her.

She smiled, "I figured you had to have something up your sleeve. Maybe you can fill me in when we leave?"

He took another drink, "Maybe. Might just make you guess."

She threw her napkin across the table at him, and stood to gather up the dishes. "You better tell me, or you'd better get used to sleeping alone."

Revan frowned. "That's cheating."

"It's just a little trick I picked up from a Sith Lord I know." She quipped over her shoulder.