Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.
It's time for some things to be revealed! Get ready for some drama! REVIEWS PLEASE!
Chapter Nine.
At least now he knew exactly how she was feeling. She didn't want anything to do with him. As far as she was concerned... it never happened. If that was the case then why did he feel so wretched? Hadn't that been what he'd wanted - to forget it ever happened, to move forward? Who was he kidding? He'd never move on from her. She was the one, and he'd lost her... "thrown her away" - isn't that how she'd said it?
It took all the strength he had to get through those next few hours. It was unbearable - not once did she look at him, yet he couldn't keep his eyes off her. She smiled politely at her new Weasley jumper and the Wizard's Encyclopaedia that Harry had bought her. But he saw it... the facade. She was going through the motions, just like he was. Well stuff that! he thought to himself. He rose from his armchair signaling towards Remus.
"I'm going out alright?"
"What?... Sirius you can't leave. It's Christmas for Merlin's sake, Harry's here. What the bloody hell is going - ?" Lupin tried.
"- Look I just have to go! Don't ask me why. You wouldn't like the answer."
"I never like the answers." Lupin grumbled.
"Tell Harry I'll catch up with him later." With that he was gone. Out of the door and into the night air. That was exactly where he planned on staying for the next few nights. He needed to clear his head of everything Hermione. Somehow she had dragged him back under her spell and he needed to escape. Besides she wanted nothing more to do with him right? So what the hell! He would do as he pleased and ignore her as much as she did him. Two could play at that game!
So that's exactly how he played it - cool and distant! A little too cool. He didn't try to talk to her again. What was the point? He stayed as far away from her as he could. The next week was spent completely freezing her out. He was determined to rid her from his mind. And what better way to do that than go out and find someone to replace her with.
~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~
Morning sickness. Nothing Hermione had experienced (even with all that she had been through with Harry) compared to the torture of emptying her stomach continuously throughout the day. Whoever came up with the name was obviously an imbecile - it came at all times of day and night and had seemed to be a constant since the start of her pregnancy. The only thing that seemed to settle her stomach was tea with ginger root.
It was around 3am. She had just finished yet another visit to the toilet bowl. Feeling wretched and knowing that she wouldn't be able to sleep until she was comfortable she contemplated going downstairs for a cup of tea. What were the chances of meeting anyone awake at this time of morning - nil. She pulled her Christmas Weasley jumper on over her nightgown and strode out into the hall. No sounds of anyone up and about - Thank Goodness. She was sure that she looked a fright. Reaching the end of the hall however, something caught her attention... a movement and some sound at the bottom of the stairs. there were people down there. A couple to be more exact. To say they were embracing was an understatement. He had her pinned against the wall, kissing that soft area of skin just under your ear. Hermione let out an involuntary gasp. Before she had time to return to her room without being caught, they turned to see where the sound had come from. She'd known who it was when she'd first seen them together, but seeing his face... his eyes on hers, made her insides twist.
Turning on the spot she strode silently back down the hall and into her room, not being able to hear Sirius' reply to the woman's question. She stood against the door for a long time just staring ahead and letting the tears fall down her face. What was she going to do? How could you be in love with someone and hate them at the same time?
~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~
"Big night?" Remus asked, staring at his obviously hung-over friend.
"You could say that..." Sirius said grimacing, as he looked up to see The Golden Trio entering the kitchen for breakfast.
"Say what?" asked Harry.
Remus and Sirius both looked at each other and then at Harry. "Nothing Harry. I'm just a bit tired." said Sirius, looking at Hermione as she busied herself with the kettle.
"Up all night were you? I thought I heard noises come from upstairs last night" said Ron as Harry laughed. Hermione just rolled her eyes at her two friends as she sat down at the end of the table and spooned some ginger into her mug.
"Don't get me a cup or anything Mione." said Ron tartly.
"Get it yourself Ron... do I look like a house elf?" Hermione snapped at him.
The men in the room just gaped at her. Hermione joking, even insulting house elves? Ron was the first to recover. "What the HELL is up with you?" he practically yelled "God one minute you're feigning happiness, the next your blowing your stack. Your mood swings are out of bloody control!"
"Excuse me?" Hermione snarled. She was not in the mood this morning for Ron's... for lack of a better word, shit!
"You heard me!" said Ron as Harry stood up.
"Hey come on guys... cool down." Harry started. "Ron - shut it! Hermione - Ron's being a tool."
"What?" Ron shouted. "It was you last night who was saying that something was definitely up with her. She hasn't been the same since the summer... we can all see it." Turning to Hermione he continued. "Quit being so... so... Merlin Hermione enough is enough. We've done everything we can think of - "
"Hmph... everything. I'll bet!" Sirius grumbled with a slight smirk.
Something in Hermione just snapped. He'd crossed the line. Pretending like nothing happened had been fine by her, but there was no way she was going to let him get away with snide remarks, especially in front of everyone. She turned her head sharply to look Sirius straight in the eye. "Well you'd know all about that wouldn't you?" His smug like face took on a somewhat pained expression, which was quickly replaced with one of anger.
"What?" said Ron who had been confused and thrown completely off track.
"Nothing." said Sirius to Ron "Hermione's just making some smart ass joke concerning myself and the woman that she saw me with last night" He turned back to Hermione. "What's wrong sweetheart? If you aren't getting any then no-one can?"
"Sirius!" Remus warned. Hermione felt as if she'd been punched in the stomach. Her eyes were full in seconds, bursting with tears. That wasn't the only thing that she was about to let loose though. Feeling the familiar sensation in her stomach and knowing that there was no way she would get to the bathroom in time, she ran to the sink just in time to bring up the mug of tea she had just drunk.
"Bloody Hell Hermione! What the fuck? Are you sick or something? That's like the seventh time that I've seen you vomit since we arrived. With this and your bloody moods, I'd think you were pregnant if I didn't know you any better." Harry tried to joke - without success.
Her head shot up way too quickly as she looked straight at Harry. The room was completely silent.
"Hermione?"
"Don't! Just... just leave me alone." she said straightening up and wiping her mouth with as much dignity as she could muster.
They all watched in silence as she left the room. No one said anything for what seemed like an eternity.
"It would explain a lot." said Remus.
"Hermione's not... she's not... I mean she... she doesn't...she doesn't even have a boyfriend for God's sake." Ron couldn't finish.
"She didn't deny it." said Harry. "But Ron's right. Hermione doesn't have anyone in her life that would fall into that category."
"That does not necessarily mean that..." Remus began.
"If someone hurt her... I'll kill them" Ron snarled.
"Look we don't know what's happened or if it's even true so don't go getting riled up just yet alright?" Remus said
"Well someone certainly needs to find out the truth." said Harry. "I'll go and try to calm her down, talk to her-"
"No!" Sirius said. "Let me go. I um... I snapped at her."
"But-" began Harry.
"Harry I'll handle it." Sirius said over the top of his godson's protests.
"Handle what?" Asked Molly as she strode into the room ready to prepare breakfast "What's going on?"
~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o ~
Where was her wand? She needed to get moving now. Resigned to finding her wand after she'd packed she moved to the wardrobe and began throwing things into her bag. She had an arm full of robes when her bedroom door was flung open.
"Get out!" Hermione yelled "Now!"
Sirius stood staring at her, closing the door behind him with a thud.
"Is it true?" he asked, looking furious.
"Didn't you hear me? I said leave." Hermione screamed, throwing the robes into her open bag.
"Hermione if you think that I'm going anywhere before I get some answers then you are very much mistaken." Sirius stated firmly.
"Fine then. Stay. I'm leaving."
He grabbed her arms and brought her round to face him. "Is it true? Are you...?"
"WHAT Sirius what? Am I pregnant? What do you care if I am? Huh? What could poss-"
"How did this happen? Did someone hurt you Hermione?"
Hermione stared at him "Are you serious? How did this happen? How do you think it happened Sirius... the usual way."
Sirius let go of her immediately, instantly cold "Who?"
"Who? Who what?" Hermione said angrily confused.
"Who did this to you? Whose baby is it Hermione?"
She didn't even stop to look at him as she grabbed her half packed bag from the bed. His question had said it all... what he thought of her. She now knew exactly who he was. She spotted her wand on the bedside table. Picking it up she made for the door that Sirius was currently blocking. "Get out of my way Sirius" she snarled.
"Not until I get an answer Hermione."
"I'm not afraid to Hex you... now move." warned Hermione as she raised her wand. But as she made to wipe the tears from her eyes her wand flew from her hand. "How dare you disarm me... you... you..."
"WHOSE IS IT HERMIONE? I demand to know." Sirius screamed.
Hermione flinched as she bent to pick up her wand from the floor, tears falling down her face. He knelt down in front of her and pulled her towards him so that she was inches from his face, sobbing. "Please Sirius... just don't... don't make me say it..." She couldn't stop the sobs that were wracking her body as she made to move away from him.
He only tightened his grip on her, shaking her slightly. "I... need to know who it is... I..." he tried to say, as his rage for the unnamed man continued to eat away at him.
Hermione raised her face to look him directly in the face. She wanted him to hear it... to understand it perfectly. "I've only ever been with one man in my life Sirius... last summer... the first and last time."
His face betrayed every emotion that he was feeling - realisation, shock, pain, guilt. Everything seemed to click into place at that exact moment. He didn't know what to say. He sat looking at the young woman in his hands... he had hurt her.
"Now please let go of me Sirius." she whispered. His hands fell to his sides as she stood. "I didn't want to say anything... you have to know that I... I don't expect anything from you. This doesn't change anything-"
"What? This changes everything!" Sirius said standing up.
She already had her hand on the door handle. Tears were streaming down her face as she turned to face him for the last time. "This is my child Sirius. I... I... This thing between us" she said gesturing between them "it's over." With that said she opened the door. There were at least ten people standing in front of her, shock written all over their faces. Well this was it - now everyone knew what she had been too afraid to face before now. Clutching her bag she made her way through the small crowd, leaving Sirius standing in her room.
"Hermione wait!" Harry yelled running after his best friend. "Wait! What does this mean?"
Hermione could hardly get the words out of her mouth. "L- Let go of me Harry. I- I n- need to b-be alone." she sobbed. Rushing through the front door, she apparated away as soon as she felt the wind on her face.
