BLOODSTREAM
Stateless
Suggested by: Vesuvious
*coughcough* Set after 1x14 *coughcough*

A/N: Just watched the scene with them in the woods and I couldn't help myself. Totally how it should have gone down after their little spat. It was SO adorable.

.:.

Jeremy didn't know exactly what he was doing standing at Tyler's door. Tyler could see it in his too big, expressive eyes.
"Hey," he shifted from foot to foot, his body swaying slightly. "Olive branch?" he asked, holding up a bag of weed.
"You're bribing me with drugs?" Tyler questioned. Jeremy frowned a bit, his lower lip poking out. "I thought you didn't party anymore." And that it wouldn't be with me even if you did, he added mentally.
"Yeah," Jeremy mumbled, "well it's the last of my stash and I couldn't think of anyone else so…I'm here."
"I'm flattered Gilbert," Tyler said, crossing his arms over his chest. Jeremy shifted again.
"You know what, whatever man, sorry I bothered." He turned and began trudging back down the driveway. Tyler realized he must've walked and a small pang of guilt hit him. Damn it.
"Hey, hold up. There's no reason to let a perfectly good bag of weed go to waste." Jeremy paused before turning back, expression blank. He passed Tyler without a word and Tyler let him. It was Tyler's turn to pass Jeremy when he stood unsure in the foyer. "This way," he said. He led Jeremy to his room without thinking it over. He didn't want either of his parents walking in on this and he didn't want to go back out either. It hadn't occurred to him how intimate his room could be until he had someone he barely knew there. The light wasn't bright enough to dispel the shadows. He sat on the edge of his bed and half straightened the cover. Jeremy cleared his throat before sitting in the desk chair and Tyler rolled his eyes. This was a shit idea. Jeremy set to work at the desk and Tyler tried to force himself to relax. He was not getting flustered because of Jeremy Gilbert. Damn it. If Jeremy wanted to smoke pot together why hadn't he just said yes at the party? When they were safely out in the woods…with other people around? More importantly, why was Tyler thinking that would have been better? He was losing his mind. He needed to get high. He stood and crossed to the desk, sliding open the bottom drawer. Jeremy shifted away and glanced at him. "Chill out," Tyler said, pulling out the vodka. He unscrewed the cap and took a long, burning swig. "So what changed between now and a few hours ago?"
"Nothing," Jeremy mumbled, licking the joint before rolling it. "Just tired of everything being a head fuck."
"Yeah," Tyler laughed slightly, "I know what you mean." He sat on the corner of the bed closest of Jeremy and took the joint when he held it out. Jeremy pulled a lighter out of his pocket and flicked his thumb over it, bringing the orange flame sizzling into the air. Tyler leaned forward, igniting the paper before inhaling. Jeremy put the lighter down and finally pulled his hood off as he watched. Tyler didn't even know why he was watching Jeremy. He should be focusing on the smoke he was sucking into his lungs, on where that smoke was going to take him. Jeremy took the joint from his fingers and Tyler took another sip of vodka. He leaned forward as Jeremy exhaled, half trying to watch the smoke swirling around his face. He was distracted and didn't take the joint until Jeremy actually handed it to him.

They didn't talk and that was fine with Tyler. More than fine. He didn't want to know all of Jeremy's problems, what exactly had led him here. He had enough of his own problems to deal with.
"I shouldn't be doing this," Jeremy breathed, threading his fingers through smoke and leaning back. Tyler just arched an eyebrow. They were on their third joint so it was a little late for regret.
"Well like you said, it's the last of your stash. One last high for the road." Why was he trying to comfort the kid? Jeremy leaned forward in response, his brow furrowing as he reached for the vodka.
"I shouldn't be doing this," he repeated, "it's a slippery slope." He drank from the bottle and then wiped his lips. "Stupid…everything." He shook his head. Tyler took the vodka back and offered the joint but Jeremy just waved him off. "Life sucks." Tyler nodded to himself, finishing the joint and stubbing it out in the ashtray. He drank more. Jeremy swam in his vision.
"Dude, I'm gone."
"Me too. Feels…empty." Tyler's eyebrows drew together.
"Don't say that." Don't let it be true.
"Everything," Jeremy droned, "feels empty." Tyler drank more vodka before leaning forward. He slid the last joint off the desk and took the lighter. He put it to his lips for as long as it took to light it. Then he slipped it between Jeremy's lips, holding it there as Jeremy breathed. He inhaled and closed his eyes, exhaling after another moment. He didn't know what to do. Jeremy clearly had issues deeper than he'd realized. Pick a fight with someone your own size. Sure Jeremy was a little bit bigger than him. But images could be deceiving. Jeremy was younger, much younger. Regret slid over him and then away. He was too high to really worry about it right now. Jeremy exhaled again, blowing the smoke into Tyler's face. He inhaled the excess gratefully. Any higher that he could climb he would.
"Just let it go." Jeremy's face screwed tight in pain.
"I can't." Tyler scooted off the bed and crouched in front of him. He held the joint to his lips again.
"You can." Neither of them spoke until the joint was gone. Tyler finished the vodka and sat on the bed again. Jeremy's eyes were glazed but the depths were blank and Tyler was glad. He wondered then why he cared. Jeremy was nothing to him. Less than nothing. He was the enemy. He thought back on the night. Somewhere in the haze of smoke and the transparency of vodka he'd changed. What they were had changed. He tipped back on the bed and stared up at the ceiling. Yeah, everything was different. The thought stayed the same even when Jeremy crawled into bed with him.
"Thanks," Jeremy mumbled before throwing his arm over his eyes. Tyler didn't look away from the ceiling. The swirled plaster was safer. Something in him tightened and Tyler realized he was sort of…happy. He didn't understand how something so unexpected could turn out so good. This was his life. It wasn't supposed to work out. He let his eyes slide closed and focused on breathing in and out. Inhale. Some of the smoke still lingered in the air. His tongue dashed out along his lips where he could still taste the vodka. Exhale. He let his entire frame relax into the mattress. This was good. Inhale. Exhale. Jeremy sighed and Tyler turned towards him, opening his eyelids just a crack. Inhale. They were close. Nearly sharing the same air. Exhale. Tyler turned back to the ceiling. He closed his eyes. He could still see the silhouette of Jeremy, painted on his eyelids. Inhale. Exhale. For just a second he thought about inhaling Jeremy. If Jeremy could somehow fly through the air and into his lungs. Inhale. Exhale. Then he thought of the smoke they'd shared. Maybe Jeremy was already inside him. Inhale. If it was possible. Exhale.

When Tyler woke up Jeremy was gone, as well as the evidence of their depravity. Tyler wouldn't admit it aloud, but he was sorry he wasn't there. He was a Lockwood. Lockwoods did not admit weakness, no matter what. He got up and dressed for school as if it were a normal day. He could even pretend, though he knew it wasn't. Jeremy would know too, it would be their secret. Tyler kind of liked that. Him and the loner kid, having a secret. Who would have thought? Maybe they could even… He didn't let himself finish the thought. It was one night. It was over now. Tyler knew better than anyone that it didn't help to hang your hopes on someone other than yourself. No, he'd depend on himself and he'd get through, just like always. Tyler told himself that the entire way to school. But as soon as he saw Jeremy in the courtyard the thoughts all flew out of his head. His feet crossed to the bleachers where Jeremy sat almost without his permission.
"Uh, hey Gilbert…how are you feeling today? You okay?" Tyler had to tell himself twenty times that no one was staring. Jeremy looked up from his text book, surprise evident in his eyes. Still too big, they still gave too much away. After a few moments he nodded.
"Yeah. I'm-better I guess. Thanks." Tyler smiled in response. He felt that warm twist again. Jeremy was better and Tyler was happy. Tyler nodded and walked away. It didn't occur to him that his happiness had depended solely on Jeremy. He didn't realize that somehow, that night, Jeremy Gilbert had found a way inside, where no one else had ever reached.