LETTING GO

Chapter 9

Superman,attired in his bloodstained uniform,was lead by a chamberlain down a long corridor of the Palace. The Amazon showed him the room that had been prepared for him and then left him to settle in. He looked around. It was impressive for a guest chamber,with a high ceiling and mosaic floors. A large iron framed bed stood in the middle,with oak furniture and fine bronze ornaments and painted vases on a built-in row of shelves. The adjoining room was the bath chamber. He looked around curiously,and stopped before a chair where a cobalt-blue knee length tunic was laid out with a pair of sandals. He picked up the tunic with an amused look.

Tunics and sandals were not exactly his idea of favorite wear and twenty years ago he would have been rather awkward about it;but now he was practical enough to realize he had little choice unless he wished to walk around shirtless. It was at least comfortable. He walked out of the room through the doorway to step onto the balcony that over looked the gardens. He had not seen Diana since her visit to him earlier that day and he recalled the look of doubt in her eyes when Epione suggested to her that he ought to remain. He shook his head ruefully, leave it to him to want to woo this woman at the most challenging time of her life. She probably just wanted him far away and maybe he would have left,but for Hippolyta and the fact that he knew his friend,despite her protestations,was suffering deep down. She needed at least one person who would not mince words and take her to task in as much as be there for her. Her sisters would be too in awe of their Queen and Donna was herself grieving.

He felt much better now that he had rested despite having to swallow the awful purifying draught. But Epione wanted to make sure he wasn't going to fall ill suddenly or do something unthinkable like grow claws and fangs.

He would have preferred to be doing something instead of lazing around. He scanned the grounds and saw the Senate building in the distance. The Amazons were trying to mount a rather large statue of Themis,Goddess of Justice, on the top of the pediment of the main facade. They were using pulleys and ropes. He shook his head and took to the air.

Timandra was on the ground directing them and they seemed to be struggling."Be careful!That's it!Left!No!It's going to hit the columns!!"

The Kryptonian held the statue easily,used his heat vision to shear the ropes from it and flew it up to the top. He affixed it easily. The Amazons looked on with relief and admiration. He had been helping them all week;they had known him for years and they still found his abilities fascinating. It was hard not to believe that he had not been sent by the Gods themselves.

Timandra looked at him as he landed beside her."Superman!What are you doing here?"

He smiled."Lending a hand. If you don't mind."

Timandra sighed."Mind?Why should we mind. You got that done in less than a minute. But you were hurt earlier. You shouldn't be here..."She looked at the tell-tale signs on his

uniform of the attack."You ought to be resting."

He dismissed that."I'm well enough. Epione just wants to observe me. That can be done while I help,couldn't it?"

Timandra looked dubious."I do not know. The Queen may not be happy..."

He smiled that boyish grin of his that never failed to charm."Let me worry about the Queen. You tell me what you need me to do."


The Queen stalked down the corridor with an irate look on her face. It was just gone sunset and she had returned with Donna from a trip to Bana-Midghall. It had been an especially difficult visit. Many of the Bana wanted to pull out of the Treaty of Integration with Themyscira. It seemed being united had only brought them as a nation more trouble, from wars to invasions of the Patriarch's world;events that had little to do with their way of life. Some of the older extremists were stirring that it was Diana's fault;for she had been responsible all those years ago in duping Hippolyta into allowing men onto the island,and opening it up to the corrupting influence of the outside world.

Artemis, to her credit,had been on Diana's side. They had been through much and forged a trust over the years. She had even tried to argue that men on the island had little to do with Ares's plotting. The God of War was devious and responsible for chaos and destruction and no amount of banning men would change that. In fact were it nor for men,Ares may have destroyed both tribes.

Matters had been made worse when the Bana raised another very embarrassing question for the Queen of Themyscira. They had heard of Superman's presence on the island and wanted to know what the Queen intended. Was she letting her emotions and loins dictate the way of life of the Amazons?If that were the case, they would not tolerate a male consort. It was against all they believed. If Themyscira was happy with that then so be it. But the Bana wanted no man rule over them.

Diana had been furious and Donna had been afraid she might have said something to really make matters worse. But Diana was wiser and very aware of her station and did not allow herself to sink to the level of the women. She was very dignified as she said that Superman had been a respected friend and ally of Themyscira for many years and he was helping them rebuild. She regretted that anyone would see something other than a genuine desire to help and twist it into something else.

The meeting had ended abruptly after that. Artemis had tried to apologize but she had to respect her people's wishes and she realized she had some work to do if she wanted to prevent the extreme faction from infecting the rest of her sisters. So the two Themyscirans had left the Bana,not very optimistic and very disappointed.

The moment Diana landed she saw the finished Senate and when she went down to see the stragglers who had stayed back to clear up the dust and sediment and wash down .It was here she heard that Superman had been helping and was responsible for the building being finished a whole day ahead of time. Just hearing that had infuriated her for no apparent reason.

Now she stalked towards his chambers to give him a piece of her mind.

She didn't even knock. She just pushed the door open and walked in."Clark!"

The room was empty,and on the bed was a blue tunic."Don't tell me he's gone off again. Hera,give me patience..."

Diana was about to go out onto the balcony,when she heard a voice."I'm here,Diana."

She spun around. He was coming out the bath chamber,with a towel about his hips and one in his hand,drying his dripping hair.

She crossed her arms on her chest and demanded,"What did you think you were doing?"

He blinked."Taking a bath. I am allowed to take a bath,aren't I?"

"That is not what I mean!I heard you went back to the building site."

"Oh. That. Yep. It's all finished."

"Were you not expressly told to stay put?"

"Er,it was a suggestion,yes. Not a decree as far as I could recollect,"he replied in that maddeningly calm way of his.

"Clark,you could be infected by the bite of a demon and yet you go jaunting around when you were told not to!Suppose there were horrible after-effects?'

He draped the towel he was using on his head over a shoulder."I don't feel very bloodthirsty. Maybe we should wait for the cover of darkness and see if I will grow fangs."

She stamped,reminding him of a little girl having a tantrum."It isn't funny!If you had been infected or the poison did not come out your system we could be dealing with a different picture!You really have been flouting my wishes,Clark,and that only undermines me before my people."

"I'm sorry but I felt well enough to go out and help. Next time I will stop to ask your permission,"he returned somewhat dryly.

She looked a little conscience stricken and said gruffly."I...saw what you did and thank you. And I do not mean to sound ungrateful but I really have enough on my plate not to have to worry about you."

Clark cocked his head at her."Fine,but you're over-reacting here. What happened at the meeting with the Bana to make you so cranky?"

She frowned."What do you mean?'

He came up to stand before her and asked whimsically,"Diana...Er,may I call you Diana,your Majesty?"

She started and protested with a guilty flush,"Kal!"

He smiled gently."Diana,you look extremely harassed and I doubt very much it is just one knuckled headed Kryptonian causing all this stress. What happened over there?"

Her shoulders suddenly sagged and she put a hand to her brow."There are extremist groups that are wanting to break the Integration treaty."

He frowned."Why?"

She said dully,"This last attack by Ares was the final nail in the coffin as one would say. They said that since they forged a peace the Bana have been dragged into battles that have very little to do with them and their way of life. They see the woes that have befallen us as my fault for going out into the world and letting the outside forces corrupt us."

"That's ridiculous! Ares has been a force of chaos and destruction for eons. How can they blame you for his part in the cosmic order?"

She sighed."They believe in the Egyptian Gods who have been kinder to them than the Olympian ones. They have lost many sisters,Kal,and in battles where I was the one involved and my mother came to the aid of the outside world. Their thinking is that perhaps they will be better off and safer with little ties to Themyscira. In addition they are saying that they want no man ruling them."

She coloured as she said that and he crinkled his brow."You've lost me."

She explained,"They actually had the gall to imply I have you here because you and I are... lovers."

"Oh. I can see how that would peeve them. They have always been a tad paranoid."

Diana added tentatively"They think I am putting my own needs before the tribes...I told them I would never do that and you were a friend and ally whom Themyscira has always trusted. I don't think they believe me."

"Well,so what if we are?What business is that of theirs or anyone else?" he asked."We have never been lovers but that never stopped the outside world from speculating and the gossip rags from plying their trade. And it never stopped us from getting the job done or living our lives."

Diana conceded slowly."No,I guess not."

Clark rested his hand on her shoulders."Diana,what is really the matter?Tell me."

She hesitated,and then whispered,"I am afraid."

His blue gaze penetrated hers."Of what?"

"Of all this. Of being Queen ...I don't know if I can be a good one...I am afraid I will fail them all."

His eyes softened."You are the bravest,wisest woman I have ever known. You won't fail."

Diana's eyes filled and she asked a question she had been aching to ask him."You said she spoke to you .What did she say?"

He stroked her cheek."She made me promise to look after you."

Diana shivered at his caress."Oh...You don't have to feel obliged to look after me,Clark. I am capable of doing that myself. I just...need..."

"Yes...?"

They were very close now. She hadn't realized that until her palms were resting against his broad,muscular chest and the scent of bergamot that seemed to surround him assailed her nostrils .Her breath seemed to catch in her throat. Clark himself felt the emotion in her and he was that close to drawing her into him and kissing her once more.

Their lips nearly met when she pulled back shaking her head mournfully,"No..."

He kept hold of her arm."We need to talk. We can't ignore this,pretend this is not something we want."

"We wanted it many years ago and when we did try it failed,"she replied painfully.

"Diana,we were both young and expected so much. I was a coward. I should have waited and given you time. I didn't and part of me regrets that. But there is also a part that moved on and was happy. You think I'm still in love with a ghost. I'm not. I loved Lois,yes,and will always be grateful for the time I had with her but it's been ten years and I find that I can't mourn forever. Even if I wanted to wallow in self pity and grief,my heart and soul just won't let me. I can remember her now and my heart doesn't ache. "

She gulped."I don't know,Kal. I feel...I must go and...you need to dress. Dinner is served in the great hall within the hour."

She hurried away,leaving him to stare after her with a grimace. This was not going to be easy.


Clark sat with Donna and had his dinner. He looked around for her but she made no appearance. Donna studied him,seeming to read his mind.

"She doesn't come to the dining room. She hasn't done since mother died. She sits in her room and eats. Or rather pretends to eat."

He looked up at that."Have you tried to get her out?"

"You know how stubborn she gets. She says it's the only time she has to herself. So I let her be. And today,well,let us say she was very cheesed off by her meeting with the Bana."

He nodded."I know. She told me."

Donna eyed him curiously."She told you what they said about the two of you?"

"That too."

Donna looked at him sympathetically."I bet it wasn't pretty."

He said,"I can handle my own end. I worked with her in the League for years. I am used to her temper. It's like water off a duck's back."

Donna coughed."Er,any truth to what they might have said?"

He said wryly,"Let's say one party is willing."

Donna tilted her head inquiringly and he tried to explain what was transpiring with him and Diana. Donna shook her head and said dryly,"Well,Clark you made your bed with that stupid comment so you have to lie in it now. Good luck with that."

Clark smirked."Oh thanks. That helps."


Diana found herself in a vast,wide field littered with bodies. She gulped as she walked gingerly over the cleaved carcasses of the dead and she searched the battle-field for some sign of life. There was none. She turned over bodies and saw faces she knew. Cleo. Euboea. Myhrra. Phillipus. Donna. Hippolyta. All dead.

Diana cried out and lifted her head in vain,and began stumbling over the corpses,looking for signs of life somewhere. There was none. She looked around. Themyscira was unrecognizable. It was just burnt-out fields and woods. A crumbled Palace stood in the distance with smoke rising tinging the skies black. Diana shouted. Nothing but her own voice echoing back at her.

She turned. She was in one of the long subterranean passageways of the Necropolis. It was freezing cold and she shivered. She saw a shadowy figure ahead of her and she called for the person to stop. To wait. Not leave her alone.

The figure moved forward. Diana ran after it."Don't go!"

Diana tried to fly but found she couldn't. She ran and found her breath giving out."Stop!"

Suddenly the figure halted and turned and Diana stopped. It turned. She looked up and saw the hood fall and Ares' deathly face grin eerily at her. Red eyes glowed and a blade flashed. Diana gasped as her hand grasped the hand with the blade but even as she tried to struggle she felt herself weaken and unable to hold it back. She felt cold metal pierce her in the heart.

Diana felt herself collapse and falling into an abyss


Clark could hear muffled sounds. Cries of distress. He sat up at once. He instantly recognized Diana's voice. He got up,threw on his tunic and flew out of the opened window and up towards her apartments. He found it instantly and landed on her balcony. He pushed the doors open and moonlight flooded into the room. She was tossing and whimpering in her sleep. The white sheet had been kicked off her. She was in the midst of a nightmare from the low keening sounds she seemed to be making.

He sat on the edge of the large canopied bed and leaned over her."Diana!"

She was trashing,and he held her arms and called urgently,"Diana!Wake up!"

She cried out and her eyes flew open and she saw a shadow over her. She jerked upright and began to lash out and fight. Strong arms held her firmly and a voice broke into her haze."Hey...It's me...Clark...You're okay...Safe."

She suddenly stopped and stared at him wildly. Her eyes were wide and sunken in their sockets. She gulped."Ares..."

"Is not here. It was just a bad dream..."he said gently,pushing her damp hair off her face so she could see him..She was trembling."You're cold as ice,"he muttered and reached to pull the sheet around her and pat her back soothingly. Diana choked,"They were all d-dead. No one was alive and I was alone. The only one alive..."

Clark wrapped both arms around her,drew her close and she felt him tenderly kiss her brow."You're not alone. You'll never be not while I am here with you."

Diana's voice quavered against his chest."Why does Morpheus torment me with these dreams?I see them dead. All of them. Every night. I see her. She is either dead or dying...and I can do nothing to save her. Help me,Kal,I can't close my eyes and not see death..."

Clark murmured in her hair."Let her go,Diana. She will never rest in peace if she knows this pain you are suffering. This fear you're carrying."

Diana moaned,"I never...got to even say...g-good-bye. To tell her how much she meant to me."

He whispered,"I know. But she knew you loved her and she loved you. All that mattered to Hippolyta was your safety. She made me leave her for you,even though she knew she was dying. She would be proud of you. For you are doing your best and being a pillar of strength for your people. And it's okay to cry for her,Diana. It helps a lot. Believe me. I should know."

Diana's resolve crumbled and she sobbed in his arms like a lost child."She said she...w-would always...be here...and my s-sisters...Euboea, Cleo, Myhrra, Helene...All g-gone... !"

He simply held her,waiting for the storm of her grief to pass. She did not know how long they stayed like that;all she was aware of was feeling physically and emotionally drained. She lifted her head and looked at him almost,apologetic for her show of emotion."I'm sorry...I did not mean to burden you..."

He shook his head and put a finger to her lips."Shhh. What are friends for?You should try and get some rest. You look exhausted."

She laid down and he covered her with the sheet. It was strangely comforting to a woman who always was the one to soothe and protect and be independent and strong. It made her feel cherished and like a little girl all over again. It was a sweet feeling. Her lashes were drooping and she reached for his hand. She tucked it beneath her cheek and he watched her as she fell asleep.

He sighed and pulled a pillow close to her own and closed his eyes. He was tired himself after the events of the day. Sleep claimed him at once.


ELSEWHERE.

"Will you look at that."

"Jonathan Kent,what are you doing?"

"Come on,Martha,you gotta see this. I think our boy is finally making some progress here."

"Really?Did he finally make his move?"

"No,but he's close."

"Oh how sweet!What a beautiful pair they are. I just hope when they wake up tomorrow it won't be back to the same old drawing board."

"Well,Diana is stubborn,you know. Like you,Your Majesty."

"My daughter may be stubborn,Jonathan Kent,but your boy is very blind."

"Clark blind?How?"

"Oh come,honey. He was. I know what you mean,Hippolyta .Clark was always a bit slow on the uptake when it came to Diana's love for him. Still I think there is something called timing and fate. I think these two were meant for each other now. Not before. He is so much stronger now and wiser. Sure of himself. Only experience gives you that. Look at how he deals with Diana. He has no fear. I mean,he was terrified of Lois."

"Well,I am most grateful to him for keeping close to her and letting her learn that being vulnerable is not all bad. I am afraid we Amazons are responsible for that fallacy,that emotion is weakness. It grieved me to see her suffer in silence."

"So it will not bother you if they get together?"

"Bother me?I ordered that son of yours to stick around."

"Well,I wonder if we will get grandchildren,ladies?"

"Oh,that would be so wonderful if Clark could have a family of his own. The only sad part is that we won't be there to spoil them. I hope they do. I had hopes with Lois,but you can't make bread with water and no flour can you?"

"Well,we just maybe getting ahead of ourselves. They need to resolve their feelings first."

"Well they better soon,cause I will go down there and give them a piece of my mind."

"Or I will have to go do some serious intervention with Aphrodite."

"I have faith in my boy."


Clark opened his eyes as the first rays of sunlight filtered through the windows and the sounds of birds could be heard outside on the trees. He felt something warm next to him and turned to see Diana curled up next to him,her head burrowed against his shoulder. He studied her. She was sleeping deeply and she looked even more beautiful in repose. He reached out and touched her ebony locks that laid scattered on the white pillow. He was almost tempted to lean in and kiss the full,damask-rose lips awake but he gently disengaged himself .

There would be time for that later, if he got his way that is. For now she needed her rest and she did not need her sisters coming in to see him lying in bed with her and jumping to the wrong conclusions. Well,at least not without good cause. He was going to have to go slow with this courtship. It was going to have to be a case of when Diana was ready,not before. He looked at her. Her lovely curves were defined beneath the thin sheet and he was feeling back to his full strength. He got out of the bed quickly.

He left via the balcony.

When next he saw Diana it was past mid afternoon. He had done some work on the diplomatic center,then he had to go check in with Epione on the Healing Isle. The healer wanted to ensure he was okay. He had gotten her approval and he returned to the Palace to put on his uniform which the amazons had managed to wash and mend. He went in search of her. He was informed by Phillipus that she was in her mother's chambers,finally having the motivation to finish pack up Hippolyta's personal effects.

He gently knocked and heard her voice."Come."

He walked in to see her sitting at the Queen's desk and putting away letters and cards and journals in a wooden embossed box. She looked up and her face coloured delicately."Kal."

"Phillipus told me you were in here. Busy?"

"No. I am finished. It's just some final things I needed to do."

He looked around. It was a huge room and very opulent .It was designed for the monarch,with its adjoining audience chamber and salon. He asked,"Considering moving in here?"

She sighed."Maybe. Not yet though .It's still too soon. I just needed to pack away her personal effects. I came to find you but you had gone to the Healing Isle."

"Yes,Epione gave me a clean bill of health. I can go home."He came to stand behind her chair.

"Oh. You are leaving now?"She felt a stab of disappointment. What was wrong with her?She ought to be glad he was leaving. It was what she wanted. Wasn't it?She hoped the flicker of dismay did not show in her eyes.

"Yes. I'll be back for my final stint tomorrow. It has been great not having to worry about the outside world for a change. But I can't ignore the deadlines I need to meet out there in the world. My publisher is very keen to meet up,and Jimmy is waiting my column for the Planet."

She said sincerely,"I have to thank you...for all that you have done for me and my sisters. I thought perhaps that I had dreamed it all...But you really did come and you stayed with me,didn't you?."

"Yes."He studied her face."You look better. Less harassed."

"I slept until noon. I did not know that I was so exhausted."

"Well,I could have told you that. How long have you been suffering with insomnia?"

"Since she died. Every night. Last night was the first time I slept for more than an hour."She sighed."I feel so much lighter in my spirit. I think I may be able to rest now. At least I won't be so afraid to close my eyes. You were right. I just needed to let go. It just has been so hard with all these new responsibilities and worries. I was afraid if I did I couldn't stop and I would be of no use as a Queen to my people."

He replied,"Well,having a good cry is a start. This pain will ease but don't fear it and give yourself time. And I want you to promise me you will slow down and talk to someone if you feel overwhelmed. You are spoiled for choice,you know."

"It's that simple,isn't it?"

"It's that simple."

"Well, I promise. Thank you,Clark."

He said gently."And if you need me just call."

She nodded."I will."

He bent and his lips brushed her cheek. Her pulse fluttered. He heard it but he only smiled at her and turned and flew out of the open window.