Disclaimer: Hey, news flash gang: It Ain't Mine. Why do I bother with this anymore?
A/N: This chapter is...long. It ran away with me. This will be one long tale. Kudos to all the lovely folk who review and thus keep Calm posting more chapters for the rest of you lazy ones to read! Enjoy!
Mornings were not Zackary Fair's friend. Mortal enemy didn't even begin to describe how much Zack hated'em. 'specially 4:30AM mornings.
Who the hell got up at that godforsaken hour, damnit? And how did the General function without caffeine this early anyway? Man, now that was a trick he wanted to learn.
Maybe it was some ancient Wutainese secret the guy'd picked up during the war? Did he give classes?
Cold shower almost woke him up, but nothing did the job like coffee. Nothing. Zack swore by the special extra-potent-triple-condensed brand of espresso he drank. With lots of cream and sugar to cover the taste of course. Black coffee was nasty stuff only edible in a state of emergency.
Not knowing why the Glorioso General wanted him up at four thirty in the fucking morning wasn't helping either. All the man'd said was Be up and ready by oh four forty five hours. I'll come for you. And left.
Without an explanation. He bloody better get bonus pay for this.
Least he wouldn't be kept waiting. Seph was nothing if not punctual. Yep, four forty five on the dot and there was a knock on the door.
This way. Still no explanation. Zack felt a headache coming on.
Following orders was all well and good. Was in the military, duh he'd be following orders. Even personal missions for the General were okay, but when it was probably about a ghost and the General was acting mighty strange, Zack felt an explanation was in order before they went and violated a whole shitload of ShinRa policies.
Sooo…what're we doing? Sir. Alright, the sir had been kinda tacked on at the end and maybe it had been a bit insolent but really there was no need for the man to look at him like that…Groveling was in order.
Sorry sir. Follow in silence. That he'd do. Easy. He'd even stop slouching. And…why were they at his office?
When did he come see you, Zachary?
Zack mentally cringed. Maybe he wasn't the only one out of sorts this morning…come to think of it though, Seph always did seem mighty put out whenever the topic of Spike coming to see him came up. Was the guy convinced Spike was an enemy spy come back from the dead? Now that sounded like a James Bond-meets-The Messengers kinda thing! And…oh wait…Seph was giving him the Look again…what was the question? Oh yeah, he remembered…
Er, a week ago? Last monday… Why did that matter? Zack hoped the General'd explain what the big deal was.
Do you know how long he was in your office Zachary? He came to the lab looking for files, do you really think he wouldn't look through your office?
Oh. Well, no. Hadn't thought of that. He'd just checked that his porn collection was intact. Seph was wearing a long suffering expression.
Exactly. Check your files, see if there's anything out of place or missing.
Wait. Seph'd woken him up at four thirty for this? To look through paperwork? SOLDIER definitely wasn't all it was cut out to be…
A thought occurred to him.
What're you gonna do Sir? Nothing made Zack nervous like an irate Sephiroth glaring at him from the corner. God, he hoped the man wasn't going to just watch.
I'm going to check the computer log Zachary. I hope you haven't been playing Solitaire this whole time...
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Computers Sephiroth understood. He liked computers. They were logical, they made sense.
It was in spite of this fact that he was glaring at the computer screen. What he was seeing was not pleasant at all. His errant blond had hacked into numerous sensitive files…and he'd decided to just go with whatever part of his subconscious that demanded he label the blond man as 'his'.
Who knew what he'd find if he actually untangled the motivations behind it. Last five times he'd tried he'd given himself a migraine.
He'd try again later. Couldn't seem to help himself. But for now he could be irritated by something else.
Namely that all of the hacking had been done into files about him or Zack. At least, those were the only connecting feature. All dealt with SOLDIER missions from the Wutai War or other mental evaluations about himself or Zack.
Why was a ghost researching two very important SOLDIERs? And why hadn't the idiotic blond just asked him? Sephiroth was strangely sure he would've told him anything he wanted to know…and he really needed to get his head examined if he was going to go spilling his guts to a ghost he'd barely known for a week.
Deep breath. Take a mental step back and think about this logically.
Item one: Half of SOLDIER and the Turks had been out asking after the man.
Item two: He'd gone to see Zack for the express purpose of finding out why.
Item three: He'd gone to see Sephiroth himself to demand why he wanted to talk to him.
Item four: He'd…probably ransacked his office too. Just like Zacks. Shit.
Item five: He'd made copies of top-secret laboratory files.
Item six: He didn't work for ShinRa, had Mako eyes but he'd never been in SOLDIER…but that could be a side effect of being dead too…
Thinking logically was not helping. Sephiroth took another deep breath.
Did he have an undead stalker or was he stalking the undead? Did it really matter? Where were his migraine pills?
Found anything Zachary? It might've been a tad unnecessary to keep the First-class on edge like that but he wasn't really feeling all that charitable at the moment.
Yeah…my alias ID is missing and so are some of my psych evaluations. I think he took a few other ones too but I'm not really sure…
What did he want to do with psychological evaluations? What did he need them for?
He really needed to talk to the ghost. There really wasn't another way to sort this all out. But finding him might be a problem. This time he'd left no assurances of returning…now that was an unpleasant thought…
What do you know about the occult Zachary?
Er, not much?
Then we'd best get to studying. We need to communicate with a ghost.
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Cloud Strife was tired. Nothing unusual there. He bet he could do a pretty good impression of a zombie right then.
The film he'd taken of the lab files was finally developed. One of his favorite hobbies was photography so he could do it all himself, but did Gaia have something against digital cameras? Hadn't been able to find one anywhere.
Wasn't why he was tired though. No, it was the thought of having to deal with the insane version of Sephiroth. More the reminder of the decision he'd have to make than anything else.
Hey, maybe he could just procrastinate for all eternity! Nah. His last New Year's resolution'd been to stop all that…
Well. Time to bite the bullet, he had a crazy man to visit and some pictures to drop off.
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The walk over to where Sephiroth's…soul was being held was actually a nice walk. Cloud found it refreshing. Lots of greenery and flowers. He'd always had a soft spot for them since he'd met Aeris.
The silence when he finally got there was…odd. Something had changed but he sure as hell didn't know what.
The Failure Puppet's here, aren't you gonna rant now?
Dealing with a guy who was always raving about how he's a failure and a puppet was just easier than dealing with another person. Figured if the man was stark raving mad then he was just that crazy sonofabitch who'd burned down Cloud's hometown, killed Aeris, and tried to destroy the whole friggen' planet.
Being reminded he was human too really wasn't something Cloud wanted to deal with. Interacting with the past Sephiroth was bad enough, but seeing glimpses of him in the crazy one was even worse.
The caged man was making a sort of mirthless chuckle which made Cloud cringe.
Puppet…heh…and now I'm the puppet too, what does it matter?
Huh? Hadn't someone explained this to him already?
Guess you didn't know, huh. Damn he wasn't good at this kind of thing! Er…you okay?
If asking a guy who'd tried his damnedest to kill you if he was okay wasn't weird Cloud didn't know what was. From the half-glaring, half-horrified look Sephiroth was giving him, he wasn't the only one thinking that.
Okay?! My soul's not even in one piece, I'm facing eternal hellfire, and the bond I feel is one-sided! Of course I'm not okay!
That was all he complaining about? Cloud had been dealing with shit like that for years.
You'll get used to it. Pause. Don't look at me like that, I know the feeling. You get used to it. Just what happens. Try not to think about it too much, that helps.
Sephiroth just stared. Fine, if that's how he wanted to be. Was good, practical advice. It worked.
Don't think about it too much? What else am I to do? Cloud nodded knowingly at him. Anger came first, it was all part of the process.
Alright think about it. Won't change anything, won't make sense, and you'll end up with a headache. Trust me on this. I know.
The man had the grace to look ashamed of himself for the first time Cloud could remember since he'd lost it. Good. Knew it was a bit vindictive but the man'd put him and lot of other people through hell. Bit of self-loathing and humility would do'im good.
Would you like a book or something? Might keep your mind off things.
Now that got a stare. Cloud smiled. Things sure had changed.
Here, I've got a few on me...there ya go. Hey, he read, Seph had no business giving him such an incredulous look. Wasn't like he was just an illiterate thug. Stereotypical thinker.
Ah…thanks. The ex-General was giving looking at him like he'd announced Aeris was an assassin, Vincent knitted, and Cid would read smutty romance novels before he'd watch porn. Whatever.
Wait, what the …? An Ouija board. Who the hell wanted to contact him with…nevermind. He knew who.
He glared resentfully at Sephiroth.
Does your past self really have to bother me 24/7? An Ouija board! Do you realize how dangerous that can be? Bloody idiot…this better've been Zack's idea…
And he was gone, leaving a slightly amused, slightly bewildered, and completely shocked Sephiroth behind him.
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This better work Zachary.
Sephiroth the Great was feeling like an idiot. An Ouija board? They'd actually have to spell everything?
He supposed it was better than nothing, but still…
Zack was giving him a reproachful look.
Got a better idea Sir?
Unfortunately, no. Proceed.
For some reason he was nervous. Having a ghost just appear was one thing, but trying to contact him if he didn't want to talk… Sephiroth feared he'd be rather upset if the man didn't answer.
I am addressing the ghost Zachary and myself have met on several occasions. Are you there?
Been prepared for the board to move slowly. Been prepared for it to not move at all. Had not been prepared for the board to jerk out from under his hands and start shooting along the alphabet.
I'm getting' it all! Good. Zack was on top of things in the spelling department. Hopefully.
He watched the board spell out words.
T-H-I-S I-S R-I-D-I-C-U-L-O-U-S
When a hand that wasn't his and wasn't Zack's came crashing down on the board Sephiroth jumped. Zack yelped.
Do you even realize how dangerous an Ouija board is? What were you idiots thinking?!
It was the first strong emotion he'd ever seen from Spike and he was taken aback by it. What was that saying? 'Always look out for the quiet ones'?
It's not a big deal, dude! Guy at the occult store said it's perfectly safe. We jus' couldn't think of another way to talk to ya, ya know?
At least that transferred the glare from himself to Zack, for which he was very thankful. His blond glared like he'd torched his hometown and killed his mother…honestly, what they'd done wasn't that bad…
You…you…Never touch an Ouija board again, alright? There's lots of nasty things out there you can let in and doors you can open that shouldn't be. Just…don't.
Watching the anger drain out of the man was as odd as seeing it to begin with. Sephiroth wondered why a ghost would look so tired and grey, like all the color had washed out of him. Not that he'd had much to begin with – though really Sephiroth was one to talk there. He barely had any. But wasn't the afterlife supposed to be restful?
I'm not at your beck and call you know. Shouldn't try to contact me. 's not how it works.
Part of him registered his blond was directing the statement at himself. Part of him noticed Zack was looking back and forth between them with a lost expression. Yet another part of him was furiously angry the dumb blond didn't understand how connected they were.
The logical part of him was gaping at himself in horror. Perhaps if it had smacked him instead then he might not of opened his mouth and stuck his foot in it.
Are you sure you're not mine to call?
Icicles were hanging off the words. Zack turned three shades of white. But it was the look on Spike's face that made him regret saying it.
Fighting in ShinRa's wars had let him see many many facial expressions of anguish, pain, and horror. The ghost's expression managed to put all he'd ever seen to shame. How he did it no one will ever know.
I – Well how exactly was he going to fix this? He had no idea. Really should've taken that interpersonal communication course. He made a step toward the ghost without really knowing what he intended to do. Reached out a hand to grasp the ghost's arm, just to bring him back from whatever horrors he was momentarily reliving.
Shouldn't have done that either. It felt oddly natural to touch the specter, familiar and yet not. Almost as though there was some sort of bond…
Spike ripped himself away faster than anyone Sephiroth had ever seen. With enough strength to break his grip. He mourned the loss of contact, even through his ever-present gloves.
No one was strong enough to break his grip. What. The. Hell? Was this normal for ghosts? And…oh.
While he had managed to bring his blond back to reality, he fervently wished he hadn't. The man was giving him the single nastiest look he'd ever seen.
You can't own souls. Not mine, not anyone's. You never learned that, did you?
He spoke calmly, but the tone was awful. It was a combination of anger, disappointment, and pain. Something about it finally shook Zack out of his frozen deer-in-the-headlights stance. Just as Sephiroth was about to say…he had no idea what he was about to say.
Seph shut the hell up! Spike – man – you okay? He didn't mean it, he's just been cranky all day and –
Now he was the frozen one. Not another poof, they hadn't even gotten to talk to the specter yet! Be all his fault if the man did leave too…
He meant it Zack. Believe me, he meant it. Zack made a frustrated noise before shooting a glare at his commanding officer.
Hey, you're not gonna just disappear forever, are ya? 'Cause I think you're a really cool guy and it'd be a real shame for ya to just go poof forever.
The earnest tone might've done it. The glare Zack was giving Sephiroth might've done it. Hell the word poof might've done it, but it made Spike burst out laughing.
No I'm not going to go poof forever. Not yet anyway. . . Least I don't think so. Planet might have other plans…I can never tell.
Sephiroth was very glad the ghost had recovered from…whatever that had been.
Now what was so important you needed an Ouija board to ask me? The tired look was back, along with a large dose of why-can't-these-people-leave-me-the-hell-alone.
Time to let the cat out of the bag.
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The General really knew how to be a bull in a china shop sometimes. Zack figured even he knew better than to start implying he owned people. Never made anyone happy.
Thankfully good ol' Zack was there to save the day. It was what he did…well…almost what he did best. After chugging beer, screwing pretty girls…nevermind.
Seph had opened his mouth again. Zack elbowed him in the ribs. The man was not going to upset Spike again! He'd done it already. Poor guy.
Actually we were just wondering if you wouldn't mind explaining…ah…er…well. Maybe Seph had the right idea afterall. Might be better just to blurt it out. Seph is utterly and completely paranoid and I'm really curious an' we'd kinda like to know what you're gettin' files and looking shit up on my computer for. If you don't mind explaining that is.
Had he said it too fast? It was very possible, when he was nervous Zack tended to run all of his words together. Made understanding a bit difficult. His speech teacher had recorded it as an example of what not to do…
I'm judging a soul. Didn't I tell you that already?
Oh shit, Seph was giving him the Look, the really displeased one. Well, he had told the man to shut up, elbowed him in the gut, and interrupted him. His ass was totally toast. But...he'd deserved it!
And while Zack had been having an internal monologue he was now speaking. Zack fought the urge to bang his head against something. Hard.
But why are you collecting information mainly about myself?
Trust Seph to go straight for the jugular. For a General the man had very little social finesse.
Well if someone had half of SOLDIER and the Turks out looking for you, just to talk wouldn't you be a bit worried about why? Spike was amused.
Point to Spike. Why hadn't they thought of that?
But why did he get the feeling that wasn't all of it?
I… suppose…
Holy hell. It couldn't be. Sephiroth the Great was blushing. A flash went off to his left.
And Spike'd just taken a picture.
Zack made a dive to get out of the way. Spike was a ghost. He could take care of himself.
What the…!
Nu-uh. Camera's gone. Promise I'll bring you duplicates!
Zack really did admire this guy. He had balls.
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Now this was blackmail material. He finally had stuff to use on Sephiroth the Great.
Cloud figured this was worth the Ouija board. Those things were bloody annoying. Made a nasty high pitched sound for awhile if you didn't answer. Hated 'em.
Lots of ghosts did nasty shit to idiots who used an Ouija board.
Cloud didn't blame them one bit.
Was also very glad Seph was embarrassed over his…stalking. It wouldn't stop the man for long, but it might buy Cloud enough time to make a decision and disappear from the space-time continuum forever.
Really looking forward to that day.
But really, was it that hard to put two and two together and realize Cloud was judging Sephiroth's soul?
But he was biased. Didn't count.
Why was the man stalking him anyway? And why the highly disturbing moment of 'ownership'? Had almost felt like he was speaking with the crazy version…
Did this Sephiroth feel some kind of bond too? But his soul was whole! Wasn't it?
Aeris had some questions to answer. Whenever he felt like getting her away from the triplets anyway. They thought he was their awesome big brother who they all wanted to be just like. Terrific.
Why did he always get saddled with difficult stuff?
Better do the insubstantial thing. The General was recovering from his shock. He'd probably try to whack him one now…
Wouldn't work. But he could try. Yep. He tried.
There went the table. Oops.
Nice aim. Two steps to the left so he didn't have to share the same space with the man. It made conversation difficult.
Plus he wasn't a huge fan of innards as a view. Nice things to have an'all but not good décor.
Hey, good news! You're arteries are not clogged. Congratulation.
The looks on both SOLDIER's faces was priceless. Completely priceless.
He took another picture. Might as well live in the moment, right?
Make it a Kodiak moment. It was a good note to make his exit on.
You'll see me again, don't worry.
Best to make sure they didn't try anything stupid again, at least not with an Ouija board. They'd do something else completely idiotic instead.
Leaving them both staring was just a bonus. Aeris had some questions to answer…
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Zachary.
Yessir?
We have another mission. Same time tomorrow morning.
I hate you Sir.
I know Zachary.
Sources say hypnosis is a no-workie. Review and I'll give you...gingerbread? Does everyone like gingerbread? I can do sugar cookies too! With frosting!
