Chapter 9, After the Storm

from Bella

I set the wrapped antique metronome on Makenna's white washed dresser beside a framed Halloween photograph. The card from Edward propped against. Kissing her forehead, tucking tighter, I inhaled sweetness and sleeping peace. "Merry Christmas…" Backing out of her room, closing the door slow, silent, I stumbled. Landing over Charlotte, both of us whimpering in the dark upstairs hall. "Shit." A lone glow from a small stained glass nightlight, illuminated the dog's weary eyes. "Don't look at me like that… I see you judging me." I pinched, feathering over her ears. "I'm going to apologize… if I can catch him."

"What... in... the... hell…" Aunt Mary stood in long twisted green satin. "Isabella Swan… have you lost your goddamn mind? It's four in the morning." She stalked quietly towards, pointing. "You're snooping for gifts, aren't you? I knew it. You are the worst. Since you were little... every single year with your peeking." Clapping her hands, she pursed her lips. "You're thirty years old. My god." I stood, rolling eyes, adjusting the pale pink scarf around my neck.

"Will you hush... Jesus." I tied my hair loose and low, mumbling. "I gave that up... like last year or so..."

"Wait, why are you all dressed and adorable. What's going on? And why is the dog staring at you like that?" She reached for the switch, we squinted. I wrapped, held her close.

"I need you to take me to the airport… can you please? Please… "

"Now? Right now?" I nodded, nibbling my bottom lip, cringing slightly. "It's Christmas morning… and this is awfully hasty…" She narrowed her eyes, wise wrinkles creasing. "And… it's quite dramatic…" She tumbled my hands in hers, warm and knowing. "I love it. Let's go. Give me five. Meet me in the van."

oOo*OB*oOo

I slammed an anxious hand on the Volkswagon dash. "Why is this thing so slow? Why do you even have this van still? It's like a thousand years old." Smoothing over my bouncing denim covered legs, I nudged, urging a reaction... anything, something to distract.

"It's a only a '72. This beauty holds a lot of memories for me, darling girl." An arched brow reminded me to let that lie.

"I'm sure it does… Aunt Mary I need to make that flight. This is insane…"

"You know I drove your laboring mother to the hospital in this. I ran out of ahead dousing it with lavender oil to kill the… well, the other fragrances… She was quite relaxed by the time we got to the hospital.

"Oh, god…" I grinned watching the slowest wipers clear fresh snow. "I can't even imagine the two of you back then."

"I don't know… we did okay. Your father and I had most of the issues. But… they trusted me with you and Emily, so…" I rubbed her knuckles, jeweled fingers tight around the wheel. "That's just it… that's what you need to understand…" I fell back, closing eyes, breathing deep. "When your parents asked… when they came to me with their plans of mission traveling… I knew what it meant. I knew it was temporary and here and there… and you gorgeous girls would be shuffled around and moving constantly. But when my brother asked if I'd help in between, and be your home base… I never hesitated. You don't hesitate with family. You just do it. I knew you weren't mine. I knew you'd go. And come back and go again. But I promised your parents I'd do my best while I had you. And we had good times… you know… huh…" I mirrored her wicked smile, honoring all the naughty we knew and she allowed. "Those are times and things you'd never have with your parents. It's a different place. A different bond, Isabella. You weren't mine… And your sister…" I stilled… the hurt still day old, fresh. "Look at me… Emily's heart… it beats and needs and knows different than yours… ours, you and me. Watching that sweet Jake die… right there in her arms… imagine that… She was forever changed. I saw it in her eyes. She closed parts of herself that day."

"I know…"

"That damage lingers. She couldn't hold that baby girl for days. And who are we…" Voice trembling, she flared. "Who are we to say how she should grieve and deal. We weren't there covered in blood, terrified…" The turning signal sliced through the pause. "I think she's able to do what she does so well, because of the shut down. It's a complicated reality…" We neared O'Hare, she concentrated, I pointed, directing in silence. "She used to give you all her Lucky Charms marshmallows you know…"

"What?"

"When you weren't looking. Just because she knew you loved them… the most."

"And based on that… I forgive her."

"Watch that sass, you. Will you breathe for a goddamn minute…" I narrowed, shocked by her tone and sting. "You've done your part. No one will ever take that away. Makenna has all the best of you in her soul, now. That's never, ever going away. That's the stuff your sister's not privy to. That's the stuff that she'll rely on when she hates her mom behind a slammed bedroom door. She'll call you after her first kiss. You'll hear about prom and the dress…that they better let me design…" She gestured wild. We moved slow, shifting up the departure ramp. "Remember that poem I taught you... I made you recite it whenever you whined about helping in my garden. Your one tiny, pitiful Saturday chore…" I scoffed, pouting for effect. "Go on… you know…" She nodded as we edged the curb.

"... And creatures to whom only God is kind, The loveless small things, the slow, and the blind, Soft steal through the rushes, and comfort find... That one?" She stared, angled, fabulous wild peppered hair brushing against the driver's seat.

"Yes. That one. Listen to you… See you remember... You'll always remember those odd little pieces and parts of your childhood. She'll remember those too. Let her go. She'll be well. I promise," she whispered, dusting the back of her hand down my cheek. A quie,t knowing moment passed, her fingers lingered, pinching my chin. "And I'll go in halfsies on a Great Dane puppy, because... well... Emily needs to be punished for wanting to get married in a pantsuit. And my god, baby girl... you really do need a better exfoliant..." I batted, she pinched tighter. We laughed, together. I pulled the visor mirror down to assess my weary shell while cards, receipts, sketches littered my lap, floor. "Okay, since we're all emotional and deep and forgiving and all that... I need to tell you something... else."

"Ahhhh… okay, but please hurry…" I gathered, squeezing the leather straps of my bag, as an airport security guard tapped on the window. Rolling the glass down with muscle and effort, I leaned away as Mary reached.

"Ladies, you need to move it on through…"

"Merry Christmas to you too, sir… please, just another minute… She's in love and this is all very exciting and…"

"Okay, Okay…" I interrupted, waving in agreement, flashing my Eclipse Air badge. "Tell me what you need to tell me… I still have to change my ticket and he probably thinks you're intoxicated!"

"Alright… okay... " She breathed, licking her lips. "Tyler's moving in and I'm kicking you out."

"Oh my god…Oh my god… are you being serious right now?" I squealed, throwing open the door.

"Yes, and I love you, but it's time and go… go get your handsome man. He's the best thing that ever happened to you, sweetheart." She pulled the door closed, I spun. My hand reaching for the handle, she quickly locked, motioned me away and off.

"No, no, no…" I shouted as she shooed. "My suitcase!"

oOo*OB*oOo

The last steps nearing the pub on the quaint Brooklyn block were slower by the next. I breathed anxious, wringing and blowing into chilled fists, until I saw Rosie's in swirls and script… beer suds as an apostrophe. A soft smile, warmth in knowing, I gripped the copper door handle. Edward's perfect profile, he counted, handling bills at a large, antique register. He'd offered to serve and close the few traditional holiday hours for the lonely and lost. The brightest winter sun blinded, as I pulled the heavy door, stepping in. "Locking up for the afternoon… sorry…" He shouted, squinting. I stalked slow. Sight adjusted, truth realized, whispering my name, he smirked sexy, shaking his head through the surprise. I settled into a dark wood stool at the bar. He rested back, arms crossed, capable and calm. Silence, the only present, time stilled, we stared. Ready to fix and renew, I cleared my throat, squaring dramatic.

"I'm… I'd like the doggie style… please." Eyes wide, he nodded, I released knotted hair, fluffing seductive, yet silly.

"Oh, really?" He challenged, quiet.

"Yeah… I love it… medium, smooth… body… a little tart… and pale… My favorite… The Flying Dog Doggie Style, please." I tapped fingertips, sighing, playing the part. He reached, opening a low cooler door without breaking our gaze. The top popped, glass bottle between us, he leaned across the bar within a breath.

"How long did you work on that…" Edging even closer, I sipped deep.

"The entire flight… The flight that you were supposed to be on, the flight that you weren't on…"

"I left last night."

"Edward…" I pouted, sad and sorry. He gently pounded and moved around the long bar, falling into the stool beside me.

"How are you… how's Mak?" His palms brushed my knees, helplessly igniting.

"Edward, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I yelled… and screamed and raged and if I could turn back the clock and react again…" He thumbed over my lips to hush.

"You don't owe anyone an apology… stop."

"But… I hurt you and you left and… I let you."

"Last night wasn't about us, Bella. And… you were ambushed. For that I'm sorry… But the rest, it's just… it's life. It's where we stand. No wrong or right. Where we come from, what we know. I wouldn't change that. You're hurting and I understand… I hate it…" He tugged me off the stool between his legs. Framing my face, I wrapped my hands around his wrists, tucking a finger between the leather cord and cold metal watch. Composed, slow his mouth met mine. Dusting new, fuller and grateful, he smirked against… "Doggie style… you're a mess." We laughed light, content. "I love my crazy, beautiful mess…"

"Yours…" I breathed.

"Mine." Lacing fingers, he led me to lock doors and into Emmett's back office. He lowered near the safe, while I skimmed the wall of built-in shelves. I traced an image of him cradling a infant Henry next to Rose. I buried briefly the suffering ache that waited at the townhouse. I turned, watching Edward stack log journals, zipping a grey deposit bag… the expanse of bare skin where his charcoal t-shirt slipped from the waist of his jeans. I caught lips between punishing teeth taking in the muscles of his thighs as he knelt, his broad shoulders flexing as he secured the steel door, spun the lock dial. Ready to touch, to connect and heal… find our new normal.

He righted, turning, his look equally deep and wanting. My hand searched behind for the door handle, the tiny lock, as he closed the heady space between. He pressed, angled against, hands sliding along and down my body, pulling me tight at the low dip of my back. He thumbed over my cheeks, hands under my jaw, tilting, mouth capturing mine, we tasted. I twisted the edge of his shirt to balance as heat spread, tongues slid. I wrapped around, pulling closer, melting, as he tangled through my hair, smoothing over my temples.

I pulled my mouth from his, tugging lips slightly to taunt. "Don't you ever leave me again."

"Don't let me…" He growled. I pushed, palms flat over his chest until he fell back, easy onto a worn, dark green leather sofa. Narrowed eyes, pursed lips, I stood over, unwinding my pink scarf. He widened legs, adjusted between, running a rough hand through his hair. Working to tease, a piece at a time, until finally boots kicked off, jeans and lace gone, I straddled, he gasped. "Fuck…" Rubbing patterns gentle at my hips, his eyes trailed down and over. Bare, brave and needing, I rocked over his growing length.

"Merry Christmas…" I joked, he scoffed, blowing an exhale.

"You're fucking incredible." His eyes closed, I outlined the arch of his brows, down his nose, sweeping over his lips. He bit playful, tongue swirling my fingertip. I giggled, he grinned, our stare again, knowing. I slid under his long sleeved t-shirt reveling the feel of his taut abdomen, pushing up and off. A tender touch danced up my spine, shivering, I rushed a kiss to warm…. deeper, hungrier by the pass, mood shifting. "Last night was the longest night of my life…" He admitted, holding me steady.

"Me too." Our lips brushed soft, breath shared. "I'm here now… I love you…" Urgent, eager, I unbuttoned, opened and freed. He stroked his cock once, again, holding at the base, and at my hip, he guided, I sank. Moaning through the connection, nails dug at his shoulders. He licked, swirled around my nipple as I moved over, finding our rhythm. Strong hips lifted, swiveled with every roll of mine. Movements, pace perfected… he pressed against, below, balancing with wet, hot, patient kisses along my jaw. "Good… It's so good…" He circled tighter, I pulled rough, his mouth to mine, tongues dipping, gasping until I tipped, quivering, overwhelmed.

"That's it, baby…" He whispered, tucked, inhaling behind my ear, peppering tender pecks to soothe. Slowly forcing me over, quicker lift and drop, wrapped in each other, he pulsed furiously inside me, groaning through his high.

Still joined, I nuzzled into his neck, shoulder, mirroring hands, fingers out in front. Centered, grateful, touch light… we calmed in comfortable quiet. "Have you ever had your heart broken?" I wondered, he sighed.

"Once."

"Tell me… And don't say last night…"

"Were you trying to break my heart last night?"

"Shut up." I pinched, pulled hair below. "Tell me…"

"I lived with someone here in New York… during grad school. A cellist."

"Sounds romantic…" I straightened, jealous and more.

"Not really. She was difficult. We were pretty explosive sometimes… too much idealistic dreaming..."

"Well, it's a good thing I'm not a creative type…" I mused, he rolled wavy strands between fingers, smirking.

"You're good at other things…" I winked, nodding, nibbling the end of his nose.

"Did she leave you?"

"Yes. She was a leaver…" He smiled, teased. "No… it was just, a very strange, intense time in my head… I think."

"I like your head… " I dusted parted lips at his temple. "I'm not a dreamer..."

"No, you're as real as it gets..." I held close. "That's why, Makenna's going to be fine... no matter where she is. You've grounded her... you've grounded me." I brushed along, a small rise, fall, thankful, a sweet tempo found again.

oOo*OB*oOo

"The rabbit-hole went straight on like a tunnel for some way, and then dipped suddenly down, so suddenly that Alice had not a moment to think about stopping herself before she found herself falling down a very deep well," I read near Henry's ear. Pausing enough to kiss over his blonde curls, desperate to distract. Beautiful ballet, sounds and images filtered from the television, filling the crowded master bedroom. Rose's doctor, Edward and Emmett huddled serious at the door for several weighted, sad moments. I tucked the quilt higher over Henry and continued reading.

"Bella, no. Put Henry to bed." Emmett's unfamiliar, demanding tone startled. His eyes darted wild, red. I righted, closed the book, quickly pulled Henry with me.

"Of course, okay… " Henry's hand in mine, I paused beside Rose. "Henry," I breathed, struggling. "Kiss your mom, baby." He stared, shaking silent. Edward kneeled near, holding his sister's hand towards Henry to touch.

"Henry…" He turned into Edward's arms, trembling.

"I'm scared," he cried, Edward nodded, whispering.

"I know…" He hushed, swaying gentle. Emmett held his hand over Henry's head, then lifted to carry him out of the room. Henry peeked over his dad's broad shoulder, motioning a tiny wave. I leaned, kissing Rose's thin fleshed, boned cheek, then Edward's, lingering to love.

Time and night passed in a blur, a blend of wake and restlessness, curled protectively around Henry. Edward moved silent through the darkness in an unknown hour, slipping in bed behind. Wonder, then truth left me still and caught as he exhaled into my hair and rested his arm over both of us. Barely damp, his cheek brushed mine, as I tightened and laced my hand in his, knowing…

a/n

Love you guys. Thank you so, so much for reading xo

Thanks, hugs to our sweetest prereaders Obsmama and FFpassion xx

Poem by Virna Sheard and of course Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll

The next is the last. One more good bye and a whole bunch of fluff and bliss.

Have a gorgeous week, please, please keep in touch...