WARNING: THIS CHAPTER MAY BE INAPPROPRIATE FOR PEOPLE WHO CAN'T TAKE A JOKE, PEOPLE WITH NO SENSE OF HUMOR, AND PEOPLE UNDER THE AGE OF THIRTEEN. READ AT YOUR OWN EXPENSE!!! (BEWARE SQUIRRELY WRATH!!!)
Disclaimer: Foamy the Squirrel and all affiliated characters are (c) Jonathan Ian Mathers at Kingdom Hearts and all affiliated characters are (c) Square Enix and Disney. I DON'T OWN THEM! GOT IT MEMORIZED!?
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What's up, everyone? It's me, Bridget, and this is Chapter Nine, where we will have 2 special guest stars. So let's all give a warm welcome to Koko and Foamy the Squirrel! Also, I wrote this Chapter after sobbing myself into a coma when I figured out who Erica's friend for Chapter 10 is so… enjoy!
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Bridget: Alrighty guys! This is our first special chapter, and if this one goes over well, we'll try to do a couple more!
Erica: And I would like to introduce our special guest star and fellow fanfictioneer – Koko (aka Kokonita)
Koko: Thanks guys! -applause as Koko walks out on stage-
Riku: Welcome to the show!
Sora: She's obviously one of my many fangirls… or something.
Koko: Um… no. Only in your dreams.
Bridget: I'm one of your many fangirls… or something!
Koko: OMG! Is that Riku!?
Riku: No. It's the uh… muffin man.
Koko: No, it's Riku. I can tell because I'm reading who said it :)
Bridget: Um… not that chatting with you guys isn't great, but we should definitely start the show now.
Erica: Yeah.
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Bridget and Erica were talking animatedly and practicing for their next award to present, when someone walked backstage. It was a girl, about their age, but it wasn't someone they knew.
"Can we help you?" Erica asked, confused.
Bridget was rapidly pressing a red button that made a loud buzzing noise.
"Yes, while we're waiting for security to show up, do you mind telling us who you are?" she asked.
"Sure. My name's Koko, and I'm your "ninth caller"," she answered happily.
"Oh. Did you enjoy your free pizza and squirrel?" Bridget asked.
"Um… no. The pizza was cold, and there's something wrong with my squirrel," Koko replied.
"Really? What's wrong with it?" Erica asked.
Koko held out a normal-looking gray squirrel with green eyes. She held it by its tail.
"Um… are the eyes the problem?"
"No."
"PUT ME DOWN! SON OF A" the squirrel started.
"Foamy!" Bridget said excitedly, grabbing and cuddling the angry squirrel.
"I see the problem," Erica said, rolling her eyes.
"So," Bridget said, setting down Foamy, "we need to make it up to you then."
"How'd you like to help us give out the next couple of awards?" Erica asked.
"Okay."
The three walked out on stage to start the show.
"Hiya! And we're here tonight to give out two more awards!" Erica announced.
"But, we have a special guest star, and… a guest squirrel, so let's a have a big round of applause for Koko! And Foamy!" Bridget shouted.
The audience clapped, cheered and whistled, and Erica, Koko, and Bridget waited for the noise to die down to continue.
"So, our first award tonight is the Most Annoying Battle Quote award," Koko said.
"And our nominees are:" Erica began.
"Ansem!"
"Xemnas!"
"And Seifer!"
"Okay," Koko started, "Well, the first one to go is Ansem. Not that shouting "DARKNESS SUBMIT!" every five seconds isn't annoying, but… well, that was really nothing compared to the other two."
Ansem walked off stage and met someone in the back.
"OMG! It's Sephiroth!" Logan shouted hysterically, clinging to Bridget's leg.
"Aw… but they're made for each other… I mean, they have common… interests," Bridget said, prying her brother off her leg.
"Yep," Erica agreed. "A regular match made in hell."
"You know another match made in hell?" Sora asked.
"How'd you get on stage?" Erica asked.
"That's not important," Sora said. "Don't you wanna know what I was going to say?"
"Nope," Koko said.
"Not really," Erica agreed.
"I do!" Bridget volunteered.
"Riku and Maleficent."
At this, and large group of Riku fangirls ran on stage and dragged Sora away. And that was the last time they saw him in Chapter 9…
"Um… right. Well, next to go is Xemnas, because even though it was VERY irritating to hear "You shall go together" every five seconds, it still wasn't enough to win."
Xemnas walked off stage, and our main characters were very happy that he did not meet up with anyone.
"Well, that means the winner is... Seifer!" Koko said cheerfully.
"Whaddya mean?" he asked.
"It' very disturbing to hear "Isn't this romantic?" when you're fighting another guy. Sick. And. Wrong. You practially scarred poor Roxas for life."
Seifer grumbled as he accepted the award and headed back to his seat.
"Our next award is Master of Disguise," Erica happily proclaimed.
"And the winner is… Riku!" Koko said.
Bridget handed the award to Riku, who asked, "What kind of award is this? When was I a master of disguise?"
Erica answered. "Well, only you could be both a creepy old guy and your amazingly hot self in one game."
"Er… right. Now, where did Sora go? I still have to kill him for that last comment."
"Your fangirls already took care of him," Koko answered.
"Excellent," Riku said in a fake, evil accent.
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Later, Erica, Koko, and Bridget were sneaking around in Riku's room.
Of course, Koko and Erica were trying to find "souvenirs" and Bridget was rolling her eyes at them, the way only a non-Riku fangirl would do.
"You guys, this is serious. We need to find that award," Bridget said.
"Why are we taking one of Riku's awards again?" Koko asked.
"Because he has like 5," Erica said.
"Found it!" Bridget said, holding up a shiny golden trophy.
"Escape Plan Alpha!" Erica shouted.
"Is that the one where we crawl back into the air conditioning vent that we used to get in here?" Koko asked.
"That's the one! Let's go!"
The three scurried over the couch and into the vent, just in time too, because Riku didn't see anything.
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"Look, it has 30,000 bids," Koko said.
"What does?" Erica asked.
"We auctioned Riku's trophy on the internet," Bridget explained.
"That's a lot of munny."
"Hey, has anyone seen my award?" Riku asked.
"Which one?" Erica asked.
"It doesn't matter which one, one of them's missing!" Riku said.
"Right. My money's on Maleficent," Bridget lied.
"I don't have any trophies!" Maleficent called from the audience.
"Hey look! The auction's over!" Erica shouted.
"Auction? What auction?" Riku asked.
"I WON!" Koko shouted.
"Won what?" Riku asked.
Just then… a random Fed-Ex dude showed up with a box.
"What's inside?" Bridget asked.
"My award!" Riku cried.
"Well… see… we sold one of your awards on the internet… but now we have money for voting machines!" Erica said.
"And I got a souvenir of the whole chapter I spent on the show!" Koko added.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Riku wailed.
Out of nowhere… Foamy came back!
"Oh I see, couldn't give up one award for the sake of the show, you cheap bastard. Fuck you, alright!?" he shouted.
"You are one angry squirrel," Bridget commented.
And then, the cry of the fangirls "HE USED RIKU'S NAME IN VAIN! GET HIM!"
The mob headed for the stage, grabbed the psychotic squirrel, and left.
"How many fangirls do I have?" Riku asked. "And where are the ones from before?"
"I don't know," Koko said.
"Well, um… that's all the time we have for now!" Erica said.
"Wait, can you two make me a promise?" Riku asked, referring to Bridget and Erica.
"Maybe. What is it?" Bridget asked.
"No more squirrels."
"That's a promise we can't make, Riku," Erica said.
"Well, how about no more squirrels from internet cartoons?"
"Deal."
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Well, that's my chapter for the day. Sorry it took so long! I had homework… and then I got a headache… and then there was more homework, so it's finally done! A little inappropriate, but that's why it's rated T. And remember to vote for your favorite pairing (Yuffie X Leon or Yuffie X Logan) and your favorite spiked hair (Sora, Cloud, Axel, or Roxas). Remember to review!
