Chapter Nine: Never Think

The past three days passed like meaningless hours to a crackhead waiting for their next hit, to the mahogany haired hybrid. All she did was wait for him-Jacob. This was normal, since the teenager had started smoking, but without the other addiction, she was becoming a bit edgy.

Today was the weekly meeting with Jasper, that was inforced by everyone.

Driving over there early, Renesmee sat in the kichen, trying out Carlsile's new 'blood popsicles'.

"Are they alright?" the young grandfather asked.

With a fake smile painted over her stressed lines of her face, "Yes, thank you."

"I knew you liked cold food, so I figured you'd enjoy these."

"I do."

Looking at her feet, Renesmee let her facial slum down into the restless nothingness that was there. Since the first night of the occurence, her head kept playing the last few seconds of the nightmare over and over again each night, until finally she gave up trying to fall back asleep.

"You alright, darling?" Carlsile's conserned voice asked.

"Haven't been sleeping much."

"Edward told me, want me to check you out?"

"No, it's nothing like that. I've had nightmares."

"About?"

"Myself.."

"Doing?"

"Drinking my own blood."

For a few moments, the house became quite. Carlsile, Alice and Esme were the only ones in the large house, everyone else was hunting. In front of them, she hid nothing-well, almost nothing.

"Why do you think your having these dreams?"

"Honestly?"

"Yes."

"Theres someone, who hasn't been there since the first time it happened-but someone wants me for me-a male. But you know, it could just be my condense."

"Does it feel like yout condense?"

"No."

"How do you feel around this person-in your dreams?"

"He scares me."

"Why?"

"He knows things I haven't even figured out yet."

"Future things."

"Yes."

Thinking, Carlsile froze-like a perfect statue. This made the young half-breed nervous, she didn't like when her vampire family did this. Sometimes, she would think they wouldn't start moving again-they wouldn't come back from this trance.

"Is this person human?"

"No. He's a vampire."

"How do you know that?"

"He wanted to drink my blood."

"How do yo-"

"A feeling I have-it's only in my dreams-when someone is harmful."

"Condense."

"Yes."

"Tell me more if he talks to you again."

"Will do."

As she pressed her lips together, Emmett and Jasper smashed throught the door, pushing eachother. They always did this, Renesmee joked that when Emmett transformed the only human thing he kept was his testostrone.

"Oh, time for little Nessie to learn how to beat uncle Emmett up," her large vampire uncle teased.

"Not everything is about you," Jasper stated, shooting a glance at Emmett.

"Darn," Emmett teased.

Jasper pointed his fingers to Renesmee and held out his hand. Jumping off the high chair, the mahogany-haired teenager took his hand as he guided her to the training room that had been built with Renesmee in mind, a long time ago. The walls were covered in soft matts, for protection.

Letting go of the half-breed's hand, Jasper crossed the room to the other side. Standing with this legs arm with apart, he was ready to prounce.

"You ready?" he asked the hybrid.

Nodding, Renesmee stood still. Ludgeing at her, Jasper held out it hands to grab her. Dodgeing him, she punched him in the face, hard as she could. He went for her again, from another angle. Once againg, she tried dodgeing, he caught her-slamming her body on the soft floor, knocking the wind out of her.

"Ness, we went over this last week. Never try the same thing twice. They will expect it. Come on-get up. We'll go again," he asked, holding his hand out.

Grabbing hold, Renesmee threw his body across the room. As it hit the wall, she darted, attempting to grab his throat. Moving fast, Jasper got out of the way and grabbed her hair, forcing her boby back against the ground.

"Ow" Renesmee mumbled, rubbing her head.

"Predict what I will do," he reminded her.

Sitting at the stairs, Edward and Emmett were gambleing on the two.

"Come on Ness, don't make me loose this time-" her father pleaded, laughing a bit.

Standing back up, Renesmee swung her leg around kicking him once, before he had time to recover, she punched him in the jaw. Attemping to kick him again, he grabed her foot and sent her body flying into the wall.

"Gosh, try going easier on me-kay?"

"If I really wanted to hurt you-I would try harder than this," he said, reminding her this was only basic.

Catching her breath, Renesmee stood up straight. Jasper watched her, trying to see her next movement. Suprizing him, she left his sight. Laughing, he turned around. Pushing him on the ground, Renesmee stood over his body, his arm in her hand, bending it back, as if ready to snap it off. Grabing at her neck, he rolled on top of her, pressing on her wind pipe, as if he was going to sufficate her.

"Get out of it," he voiced his teachings.

Picking her arms up, she slammed his hands down, and punched him in the face. Once again, he wrapped his hands around her throat.

"What is up with the punching today, kid?"

Closing her legs around his body, she used that leverage to throw him across the room, into the wall. Picking herself up, she stared him down.

"Nice, you have originality, I'll give you that."

Darting at him, she grabed onto his arm. Useing the arm she grabed, he slamed her body against the wall, pressing the other arm to her neck and holding her above the floor. Biting down hard on his arm, she kicked his legs out from under him. Standing over him, she pressed her hands to either side of his head, as if to snap it off. Click.

In this daily training, when you killed the other person of torn off a limp that they could no longer use, you clicked her tounge against the roof of your mouth to simblize that the other had been hurt badly or killed.

"There you go," he said, knowing she had learned something and used it to defeat him in the fake attemped to kill one another.

This was the first time she had got him though, really got him.

"What? Your jokeing right, you let that little thing beat you? I was counting on you" Emmett complained.

"She has originality that I can't see past, it would have ended the same way for anyone else. Her age influences this. That is her tool, and she uses it to her advantage well," Jasper explained.

"That's my girl," Edward smiled, knowing her speed came from him.

"You almost had me there for a while," she gave it to Jasper.

"Most attackers would go for your throat, knowing you rely more on air and you bleed. It's your target zone, unlike limbs like other vampires. We, as full vampires protect the limbs. You though, if they think your only a vampire, which newborns would, will also go for limbs, so you need to find a way to protect both."

"Great. That's just perfect."

"It's life."

'Yeah-my life'


Listening to music flow through the small ear pieces the hybrid had placed in, to tune out her parents as they drove her back to their home-the cottage.

Blocking her thoughts from her father, the only thing in her mind was the lyrics to the songs that meant this-or-that to her. Right now, none of it made a diffrence. All she wanted was Jacob, and these needs, this addiction was getting the best of her. Everyday without him it got harder. It was more of a hassle, to get up, get dressed and do things that use to be effortless to her. Without him, she saw no reason for anything. Which was something she had to get pass. Her need for him would not control her.

"Renesmee?" her mother broke her consentration.

"Yes?" she asked, taking the ear phones out.

"Jacob is here," she stated, opening her door to get out. Hand in hand, the young couple that was her parents, walked into their cozy home.

On her side, the car door flung open. Jacob stood there, shirtless, shoeless and smileless.

"Do shirts mean anything to you?" the hybrid asked, stepping out of the car.

Closing the door behind her, Jacob shrugged.

"Is something wrong?"

"No. Yes-do you mind if I come back later? I need to take care of something," he growled through his teeth.

"Promise you'll come back?"

"Yes, as soon as i'm done. It won't take long."

Nodding, Renesmee let her head hang. As he turned, the half-breed needed so badly to fix the immediate craving she had for him. Stepping infront of him, she pressed her lips to his, holding his face between her palms. Grabing at her waist, the shapeshifter slammed her body against his, knocking the breath out of her. Gasping for air, the mahogany-haired female pulled her lips away from his. He was angry, and she was pushing it. Tangleing his hand in her hair, he closed the gap between the parted lips, forcefully pressing his lips to hers. After a few moments, Jacob stoped, holding her face in his hands that were partiality still tangled in her curls.

"I'll be back, soon. Promise."

Then he snapped away from her and left.


Looking over at the clock every minuet, persistantly, Renesmee realized the time wouldn't go any faster just because she wanted it to. Wrapped in white covers, her tiny figure was balled up, dressed in a pink silk night cami and shorts. Looking around at the wooden curved walls, the mahogany haired hybrid picked herself up from the spot in which she was.

Walking to the window, the girl stared out into the bright hazely-blue-gray blanket that covered the sky, sparkled with balls of flaming fire. Looking across the tree tops, the paine in her bedroom was straight with them. Lightly her radio was playing Florence and The Machine-

'The lights are on, but you're not home

Your mind is not your own

Your heart sweats, your body shakes

Another kiss is what it takes

You can't sleep, you can't eat

There's no doubt, you're in deep

Your throat is tight, you can't breathe

Another kiss is all you need

Whoa, you like to think that you're immune to the stuff, oh Yeah

It's closer to the truth to say you can't get enough,

You know you're gonna have to face it, you're addicted to love

Might as well face it, you're addicted to love'

Favorite band, by far for the young girl. With a small internal giggle, her minature body turned away from the window. Trying her best to ignore the ticking clock, the hybrid layed her body across the white bed.

Thud.

Glancing, Renesmee looked around the room for the nose-maker.

Thud. Again.

Pealing her weight off the large bed, the young half-vampire listened closely.

Thud. The window.

Rushing over to the window, her hands placed on either side of the paine. Looking to the ground, she spotted a large human figure with her inhanced eyes-Jacob. Her hands danced, far to fast to be calm. Throwing open the window, Renesmee stuck her head out the opening.

"Step back," Jacob warned her quietly.

Immidetly, the mahogany haired teenager took one-two-three-four steps back. Before she knew it, in a blink, he was infront of her, pulling his torso inside the window.

First off, the hybrid noticed how beautiful he was, like always-knocking the breath out of her. Then her eyes slowly fluttered down to the bleeding scrapes and cuts.

Throwing her hand over her mouth, the half-vampire held her breath. Grabing hold of his oversized hand, she pulled him into her large white bathroom. Turning from him, she quickly snatched a towel into her hand and let it sit under running water for a few moments, then she pressed the white cotton to his bleeding wounds.

"I'm sorry. I should have gone home first," Jacob apoloygized.

Shaking her head, the imprintee pressed one hand to his cheek.

'Don't talk. I can't respond. Hold on, okay? Just let me clean your wounds'

Nodding, Jacob focused his attention to her hand as she collected the blood in the small hand towel. Throwing the towel in the sink, Renesmee searched in her cabinates for medicine to fix him up. Grabbing a black bottle and a few cotton balls, the focused girl pressed the material to his open wounds. He jumped a bit, but kept still enough for her to still clense his cuts.

After putting bandages over his wounds, Renesmee took the lighter from her drawer and lit the towel on fire.

Closing her eyes, Renesmee opened her mouth, breathing in. To her delight, the air around her was bloodless. Re-opening her hues, Jacob came into sight over on the white bed. Walking over to him, she ploped down beside him.

"Now, tell me why you were dripping in blood."

"I got into a fight."

"With?"

"Sam."

"Why?"

"He was being-just plain controling and-he kept trying to tell me aweful things about you, that weren't true."

"So?"

"We got into it, and I broke his leg."

"Jacob!"

"He deserved it. I sent him to Carlsile, the blooksucker had told me to come here to ask you for help."

"You can't do that."

"I can do whatever you want. Plus he needed to be taught a lession."

"You sound like a real asswhole."

"Hey-it happens sometimes."

Shrugging, although Renesmee hated the idea of the wolves fighting over her, she let it go, "True."

For a moment, his eyes stuck to her, like a lion stalking his pray, then his attention turned, and his free hand scratched his head. Breathing in deep, he got up, jerking himself around.

"Gosh, Ness i'm sorry. Okay? I didn't mean it-"

The chocolate hues of the young hybrid looked up at him, confused. He was apoloygizing. For what? Why? He did nothing wrong.

"Look, I was stupid. I didn't mean to make you upset. I'm sorry, nevermind okay. I'll go make friends with Sam, i'll fix it okay?"

"Jacob-" her voice cracked, then the realization that she had been crying came to her, "It's fine, i'm okay"

Taking a seat next to her, Jacob cradled her face in his hands, trying to wipe her tears with his thumbs. Silence filled the room, making it unbeareable for the young half-breed to breathe. Why was she crying? Her addiction was forming a full on need for the boy in front of her. The fact that Jacob and Sam had gotten in a fight over her, bothered her to no end. But it wouldn't cause her to cry.

"Just-don't cry, okay? I can't stand when I upset you."

Nodding, Renesmee tried to soothe herself, not wanting Jacob to feel any worse. Lightly, the teenager pressed her hand to his, closing it in hers. Looking down, she fliped her hand over, so there palms met, pressing one finger tip to his, and then the others. With a small laugh, she lifted up there hands.

The two hands were so diffrent, so unique. The oversized palm, russlet colored, strong-powerful, aged, warm, werewolf. And the tiny pale fingertips, weak-humanlike, young, chilled, half-vampire. Everything about the two of them was the opposite of the other, yet they fit so well together somehow. Like two puzzel pieces coming together, they were perfect for eachother. No one else would understand, because they couldn't see it. They couldn't see them for just them-just Jacob and Renesmee-just them. All they saw were all the diffrences, everything that made it hard for them to be together, not for the things that made it so easy.

With a genuine smile painted over her face, the girl pulled pressed her finger tips to Jacob's mouth, brushing her cold marble skin against the warm heart-shaped pink of his lips.

Closing his hands around her hips, he pulled the hybrid to him. Sliding her fingers across the skin of his face, she could feel the slight stubble forming from the goosebumps her touch was creating. Gulping hard, these small, effortless movements made Renesmee more than just nervous. Heart racing double time, breath deepened-throat tight, body shaking slightly, she had all the symptons of a young love sick girl.

Pressing his blazing-hot forehead to her's, he whispered, "I love you."

Light-headed, the tiny hand of the imprintee locked itself behind the werewolf's jaw, pulling him to her until there lips met. For a few moments, there lips moved in sinc like everyother kiss they had shared, then his lips parted from eachother, and his tounge lightly traced the outline of her mouth. With sharp breaths, Renesmee also parted her lips, pressing her tounge against his.

With a shock of need, Jacob moved slightly, holding on to her as he did. Landing on top of him after the swift movement, the hybrid's knee's pressed to the blankets of her bed, on either side of Jacob's hips. Their bodies pressed so close together, she could feel his heart pound from the movement in his chest. Tangleing her fingers in his short ruffled hair, the imprintee's hands were hard on him, needy and urged. Locking his hands together across her back, he pressed their bodies closer together. Laying back, Jacob held onto her, pulling him down with her, until she hovered over him.

Slightly parting her lips from his, she lightly let her head hang back down to peck his lips, "I-" Peck. "Love-" Peck. "You." Peck.

Smiling against her heart-shaped, Jacob opened his eyes to look up at her. Peck. Then she stopped moving her head, eyes still closed, hiding her warm-chocolate hues. Running his hands along her body, his fingertips traced images in her back. Blinking a few times first, the hybrid slowly opened her eye lids. In his eyes, there was a smile.

Pressing her finger tips to the skin around his eyes, she held herself up with one hand, "Smile more-please?"

"Why?"

"I love when you smile."

"Then I'll work on it for you."

With a small giggle, the girl locked her arms under his, folding her hands around his shoulders, falling onto him. Wrapping his arms around her minature body, he held her close. Almost immeditliy, the young girl feel asleep.

Eyes closed, skin pressed against his, hearts beating the same rate-she began to dream.

I was in that place. Where he was.

Where was this? Why did this area feel so familiar to me? Did I know it? Have I been here before? Outside of this trance.

"It's nice to see you again, Renesmee."

The voice spoke to her, just like it had the first time.

"What do you want?"

"I told you. Answers will come with time. For now, we are going to go over that lists of wants."

"We-are going to do nothing together!"

"First off-lets talk about that little lust of yours-"

"How do you know all this?"

"I can see inside your head. Not just your thoughts, but things you haven't even thought about yet. Ha. You wonder about Jacob's past love."

"So?"

"I can help you with that."

"How?"

"Well, you seem to forget. I know things you don't yet."

"Okay-this still means nothing to me."

"Who was Jacob's best friend? Who is his past love?"

"Hell if I know, and frankly, I don't care. She's dead."

"No-Renesmee, he said 'something like that'. Meaning-"

"She's not dead?"

"Not techneically-"

"A vampire?"

"Yes."

"So what?"

"Who was Jacob close to before your birth? How did he know you?"

"Why does it matter?"

"Think Renesmee, you know this. Think hard."

"I- I don't know."

"Yes you do. Think."

"He knew Edward-"

"They were never close. How are you half-human? Who was Jacob close to?"

Just then-Renesmee remembered something that had once ment nothing to her-

"Back, way back when Jacob was my best friend-" her mother had told her while holding the young hybrid in her arms, "now that love is yours."

"Mom-" the imprintee drew in a sharp breath.

"Yes. Mrs. Bella Cullen. Back before you were a twinkle in her eyes, she was Isabella Swan."

"I don't get it"

Memories, that were not mine, that I should not have in her posession, flashed in my mind. They were all of Jacob and my mother-my human mother. Hugging. Laughing. Heart-broken. Being close, holding hands. Relying on one another. Kissing!

Then, they went away, abruptly, just has they had come.

"This is a trick. You want Jacob away from me."

"He said it himself. You can't deny the cold-hard truth."

"Lies-"

"Ever think maybe they still feel that way about eachother. They secretly want eachother. They were perfect together-back then. What was suppost to happen."

"STOP!" Renesmee shreiked.

"Believe it! I'm only telling you what you are already thinking."

"It can't be-"

"But it is."

Then, like every other time the scrape on her neck came-not paying attention-she hardly noticed the girl in front of her dead.

Flashing open, her eyes looked down at the body which she held onto. Out of anger, the hybrid pulled her torso away from him and slammed her fist hard, against his sleeping face.

"How could you?" Renesmee shouted.