Moments of Heartbreak
She kept walking by the streets. Her heart was crushed and all she thought was to get even with Matt but the last thing she needs right now is to start another fight.
"Revenge is unnecessary. It'll only make things worse. What should I do?" She thought as she looked around.
The road was very quiet and not even a single person in sight. There were no cars at all. She was thinking of taking the cab home, not caring about the midnight charge. She stopped outside a convenience store, hoping a cab would drive by and notice her where it's not dark. After ten minutes of waiting, she decided to get herself a drink and in the convenience store she went.
She grabbed a bottle of Evian mineral water and proceeded to the counter to make her payment. She gave the man money and looked around the store. This was the exact same store that she and Matt would always get a lot of things from. They'd always buy quite a number of chips and drinks and then hang out at either her apartment or his and spend quality time together. But she snapped out of it and took her change and drink and left the store.
She looked at her watch; it was 1am but her phone didn't ring at all. Her mother didn't call so she assumed that she allow Sora to stay out late for the night. She didn't feel like going home early so she walked home. She took out her iPod, plugged in her earpiece and turned on her favourite playlist. She was supposed to feel slightly happier but she remembered that the songs on her favourite playlist reminded her of Matt. But what the heck, she just continued listening to it anyway.
Sora just kept walking; not even stopping. She's used to travelling on foot no matter how far the distance is so walking doesn't really bother her.
"Why, Matt? Why? Why must you make me do this to you? What did I do to deserve this? I care too much about you, Matt. Did you even see that? I love you, Matt. I swear, I really do," Sora said to herself, barely above a whisper.
She let her tears fall because she doesn't care anymore. She just needed to cry and be alone. Matt is one of the people that is close to her heart and yet he took her for granted. Of course, she made a decision based on temporary emotions but if only she could, she would completely delete Matt from her life; but she just can't. She loves him too much and she still has a hard time letting him go.
Thinking back, she regretted letting him into her heart. She knew about his feelings for Mimi but yet she agreed because he told her that his feelings for Mimi have faded. In her head, she told herself, "How can I be so stupid? The first month with you was perfect. We were so in love; we were always together. But then you and I slowly start to drift apart and I watched you grow closer to Mimi. You made Tai so angry and you made me so devastated but still, I didn't complain. I let you be close with Mimi because she's both your best friend and mine. Tai, I'm so sorry..."
Sora looked down, clenched her fists and felt terribly remorseful. Now the person she needed to see was Tai. "I've let you down, Tai. You've been there with me since day one and I was your childhood sweetheart. Yet, I turned my back on you and chose your best friend over you. You were there with me every step of the way. You watched me grow up into a young woman. You played sports with me and you'd always remind me that I'm different from other girls because I'm special in my own way. Your words were sincere and yet..." She looked up and turned around as she was distracted by the light of an incoming vehicle. She thought it was a cab but no, it was just a random driver.
Sora stopped walking for a moment and sat at the bench that was not far away from her. She turned off her iPod and dumped it in her bag. She sat legs crossed on the bench and continued to cry. All she ever wanted was a perfect relationship with a guy that she cares a lot for. She cared for Tai a whole lot more than she cared for herself sometimes. She felt the same way for Matt too.
"Matt, all I asked for is for you to love me back. Is that too much to ask for? I'm sorry if I punched you, love. It's just one way to get my message across. I knew I wasn't supposed to enter the gents but I had no other choice. That was the only time you were alone." She looked at her necklace with her crest of Love on it. "I'm the one with the crest of Love and yet, love has been so evil to me."
You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought that we could be
You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be but we lost it
All of the memories so close to me just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending
It's nice to know that you were there
Thanks for acting like you cared and making me feel like I was the only one
It's nice to know we had it all
Thanks for watching as I fall and letting me know we were done
He opened up the door, letting her into his car. His eyes were red and it was obvious that he has been crying his eyeballs out. She didn't know what else to do except giving him a hug, his head resting just right below her jaw.
"Everything will be all right," she whispered in his ear as she comforted him.
"No, nothing will be all right. I feel useless and I screwed up," Matt tried to hold back the tears but he couldn't.
"Tell me what happened, Matt..." Mimi wondered what Sora might've said to make Matt feel so awfully guilty.
She knew that Sora can be very rough with her words when she gets mad. She looked around, realizing that Sora wasn't in sight and she immediately got worried.
"Where's Sora?" Mimi asked.
"She left and she left me," Matt replied, with a blank stare, tears in his eyes.
Mimi could feel her heart sink, "I knew that I shouldn't have done this. I shouldn't have led him on. Now everything's falling apart," Mimi thought to herself.
"I'm so sorry, Matt. I should've stayed away from you. I mean, Sora's a really dangerous girl; we all know that. It's my fault too; not just yours. I should've just stayed with Tai..."
Matt immediately sat up and looked away from Mimi.
"Matt, please don't behave like this," Mimi begged.
"Then why did you say that you should've stayed with Tai?" Matt felt his blood start to boil, causing him to raise his voice.
"Matt, my parents loved you and they were utterly disappointed when they heard the news about you choosing Sora as your girlfriend and not me. I don't know if they still love you though; but now, they love Tai," Mimi couldn't deny that she does have strong feelings for Tai as well. He has helped her so much and she didn't know what she could do to repay him. Matt wasn't there when she needed him but Tai was.
"I can't hurt Tai, Matt. He's more than just a friend to me."
"Of course. Tai is always the perfect guy for almost every girl. I may have the looks but he's got the personality."
"Matt, don't be like that..."
"It's okay, Mimi. Really, it is. I'm used to it now. Tai and Sora hates me and the love of my life is in love with someone else. I guess I'm just born to be a loner."
"You wouldn't have the crest of friendship for no reason, Matt!" Mimi couldn't hold it anymore. Her head just felt like exploding. "I can't stand it when you talk like that! For once in your goddamn life, get a grip! Why can't you look on the brighter side of things? Have some hope in you!"
Matt kept quiet. He finally came to his senses. The reason why he loves Mimi so much it's because she's a great motivator. Everytime when he's feeling down, she would be the one to cheer him up. She's like his sunshine. And he loves the way she loves everyone around her. Her sincerity is just so pure.
"The man I fell in love with is missing. In case if you do see him, tell him to give me a call," Mimi said to Matt, giving him a hint.
She didn't want to get anymore upset than she already was so she got out of his car and went towards her villa. Matt looked down, his heart aching even more. He never liked arguing with Mimi. Two times in a day they had fought and Matt didn't like the feeling of it. Mimi was about to open the door to her villa when Matt pulled her by the arm, catching her by surprise. Mimi was about to speak when Matt gave her a kiss on her lips.
"Meems, I'm sorry and I know 'sorry' doesn't cure anything but I am sincere about this. I've never loved any girl the way I loved you which is why I get worked up whenever you talk about how great Tai is and all that crap. I know I'm not as perfect as Tai but at least I know that I am good enough. If you don't feel the same way as I do, then it's all right. Now I want you to look at me in the eye and tell me you love me and no one else," Matt said to Mimi.
Mimi was torn into two. She simply just cannot choose between the two best friends. She loved them both the same. Instead of looking into Matt's eyes, she looked down. Looking into his blue eyes only made her feel like crying more.
Matt took a step back and turned around to walk towards his car. Judging by the actions that Mimi showed, since she had looked down instead of looking into his eyes, he knew that she loved someone else too. At that moment, all he needed was a break or a short vacation alone. He wanted to be able to find himself again and only then would he be able to open up to the others again. He just needed his space and he's tired of causing or being a part of drama.
Mimi watched him walked away. She could feel the tears in her eyes and whispered to herself, "Matt, I love you. I really do..."
She didn't wait a second longer and chased after Matt. Matt was about to open the door of his car when he turned around and saw Mimi running towards his direction. Mimi ran up to him and didn't say a word. All she did was kiss him on his lips and then she whispered to him, "I love you, Matt. Even if there is someone else, that doesn't mean that I don't love you."
