And what's the worst you take
From every heart you break
And like the blade you stain
Well I've been holding on tonight
What's the worst that I can say?
Things are better if I stay
So long and Goodnight
J'onn opened his eyes, blinking to make sure he was seeing correctly. He was surrounded by darkness, which made it impossible for him to make out exactly where he was. Glancing around, he saw a solitary spotlight ahead of him. In the middle of the light he saw a figure. From this distance he couldn't make out what or who it was.
He walked closer to determine what exactly he was looking at. The closer he got the more the figure became distinguishable to his eyes. It was Preston. Her head hung low. At first glance it appeared she was asleep but as J'onn drew closer, he noticed she was looking down at something on the ground below her. He followed her line of sight and saw a body.
Moving even closer he could clearly make out what he was really looking at. Preston was standing over a body. Aero's body. As he approached, Preston looked up at him, tears in her eyes, her face red, blotchy and visibly shaking. He wanted to call out to her, but he could only take steps to close the distance between them. With the slightest nod, Preston directed J'onn's attention to Aero who lay before them in a puddle of blood. So much blood it soaked the ground all around her. Her wings, which at first glance appeared normal, with a clear view you could tell they were no longer attached to her body. The white glow from her eyes was completely gone, leaving blackness in their absence. Her skin was severely pale and had a gray undertone. J'onn could not determine how long she had been laying there but he knew for certain that Aero was dead.
Preston tried to speak but every time she did her tears and whimpers took over. J'onn was so close to her he could feel her body shake against his. She felt cold. As he wrapped his arm around her back, willing her to take comfort in his embrace, he suddenly fell back, and his world went dark.
J'onn forced himself to sit up. Opening his eyes, he became conscious of where he was. He was alone. His senses kicked in and he was aware that he was in the room he was occupying at Wayne Manor. J'onn stood up from the chair, where he realized he must had fallen asleep.
What had just occurred? That was not his dream. He had not been in his own mind. And he knew he hadn't been alone. He could sense her all around him, penetrating the darkness. That darkness, that atmosphere, it all felt like Preston. It didn't make sense to him but things involving telepaths rarely did.
As he grasped what had just happened, he quickly morphed back into the body he commonly used. His skin transformed into a darker green, the point on the top of his head turned into a rounded form to appear more like a human's while he shrunk himself to his appropriate human height, six feet. The molecules used to transform the color of his skin, started shifting again to form the outfit that others were accustomed to seeing him wearing, red straps ran across his chest while blue boots formed around his legs and matching skin tight shorts began to appear while a huge cape emerged from his back and draped to the floor As soon as he was done morphing he hastily made his way to the large guest room, the one that Preston was currently staying in.
His pace slowed as he neared the door, which was slightly ajar. Just one thought ran through his mind as he quietly entered the room. How?
"J'onn, she's dead."
His eyes strayed around the room, in dire need to find something. After a few seconds his eyes landed on what he was seeking. He took a breath in, recognizing he overreacted. It was her, Preston, she was the one who spoke.
"What do you mean?" He looked at Preston. She had the same demeanor as she did in the dream. Her head hung low and tears were in her eyes.
"You saw her too didn't you?"
Immediately after the words escaped her mouth, J'onn was brought back to the darkness. But he was not in his own mind.
"How are you doing this?" J'onn was so confused and if he was honest with himself, a bit frightened.
Preston looked at him, confusion written all over her face. J'onn could see the same fear in her white eyes that he knew was present in his own. "I..." she stammered and started to rub the side of her head, as if in pain. "...don't don't know." The look in her eyes suggested she was desperately searching her own brain for answers. Suddenly, she sat upright and there was a flash of clarity in her eyes. "Strange. He was experimenting with powers."
"Yes Dove told us that you both had been injected..." J'onn trailed off, a hypothesis forming in his own mind. A conclusion, an answer, was manufacturing itself. He could not be sure though until he had a few more questions answered. "Have you had any other telepathic encounters? Can you read my mind now?" J'onn looked at her intently, inviting her into his own mind.
"I'm not sure. I don't know. I don't know how I did it."
J'onn could read the desperation on her face. "Do I have permission to enter your mind? Find some answers?"
Preston nodded, striving to show J'onn more confidence than the obvious apprehension she really felt.
Dove strode forward, grabbing on to the parallel bars with all the strength he had in his arms. The upper body strength he had always longed for was now a reality. Unfortunately, the achievement did not come without a cost, full use of his leg. He lifted himself up and tried once again to place more weight on the leg. As soon as he did, his ankle gave out.
Normally staying positive was easy for him, after all between him and Hawk he was always the one who would build them both up and keep them going. But even weeks later, the time he spent in the underground medical facility in Africa got under his skin. So much so that what used to come easily to him, staying positive, was now a fight, a struggle.
Dove grunted, frustrated in himself and his situation. But there was another reason he found that he was unable to focus completely on his physical therapy and on getting back into the swing of things.
Preston.
He had heard nothing about her. His power allowed him to sense that she was still in fact alive, but that was all that he knew. His brother got upset every time he had mentioned that he was worried about her because as he said, "You should be more worried about yourself and focusing on getting back out there to help others."
Hawk wasn't wrong, though he could have been more understanding about the situation.
Dove would not admit it to himself but there was another thing that was bothering him. A whisper of a feeling that he never let himself experience. It was buried so deep that he didn't even know it was a problem. As time went by and he heard nothing about Preston, hate was very slowly growing inside him. Right now, it remained small, but he would soon notice it and the affect it would have on him.
"Master Bruce." Alfred quietly beckoned the man lying in the bed. "Master Bruce, you have a visitor."
Opening his eyes, Bruce looked up at Alfred. "Alfred, what happened last night?"
"Sir, you fell asleep outside of Miss Preston's room. J'onn and I found you later that evening and he carried you back here. Master Bruce, that was two days ago sir." Alfred knew that comment was going to anger his protégé.
Feeling overwhelmed with the information Bruce's mouth gaped open. He wasn't quite sure how to react to that.
"I apologize Master Bruce for not waking you sooner, but sir you were exhausted, and your body needed the extra rest. It has been a trying few weeks for you not only physically but also emotionally. I have been observing you and know you have been sleeping very little. Every minute you aren't with Preston you are keeping yourself occupied. I know it's because of the guilt you feel. This guilt weighs so heavily on you sir, but…"
"Alfred, that's enough," Bruce responded in a very calm manner, surprising Alfred. He cleared his throat and stood up allowing Alfred to help him put on his dressing gown. "You said I had a visitor. Who is it?"
"He awaits you in the study."
Bruce nodded and started to head out of the room but paused and laid his hand on Alfred's arm, looking up at him. "Thank you for being worried old friend." He patted him gently and walked out of the room.
"Don please forgive my appearance I just woke up." Bruce motioned for the man across from him to sit down on the chair opposite. He also sat, making sure to give the appearance that he was relaxed, and this was in informal visit even though the fact he was still in his dressing gown already said that for him. Glancing across the room he noticed a cane propped up against the wall, abandoned. Bruce thought it was left so his guest wouldn't appear weak. But although he wasn't using the accessory, Don made no pretenses about his handicap. Seeing the affliction with every step Don made hurt Bruce's heart. "How is the physical therapy going?"
"How is it you know about my well-being, but you haven't felt the need to tell anyone where Aero is or how she is doing?" Don was surprised at the amount of displeasure his words were laced with. Aghast at his reaction, he took a deep breath and continued. "Bruce, I know she's alive I can sense her. I would have thought after everything her and I went through together you would have the decency to keep me abreast of the situation." He felt the anger rising again in him. Using all the willpower he had at the moment, he forced himself to speak more slowly, hoping this would keep the feeling at bay. "For god's sake Bruce she was dying. You think you would reach out and let me know that she didn't."
Not knowing what else to say he forced himself to stop talking. Hell, he didn't come here to do this. He had no idea where this was all coming from, he just saw Bruce and the words came bursting out of him like they had a mind of their own.
Slumping back into the chair he crossed his arms, feeling slightly embarrassed with a tinge of justification. Unsure of what else might come out of his mouth, he decided to focus on the lamp on the table beside him instead of the man who sat in front of him.
"You're right." Bruce felt a bit defeated. Since he sent Aero on the mission he, for the first time in his life was second guessing any decisions he made and actions he took. Don's power wouldn't allow Bruce to hide how insecure he felt. So, he relented and in a move that was very unlike him, released the pent-up feelings he had been desperately trying to hold in. "I've made a lot of mistakes regarding this whole ordeal. Not allowing you to know how she is, is among them."
Unsure of why, Bruce felt the need to keep going, wanting to reveal all his faults and lay out all the sins he knew he had committed, especially recently. But he often found himself feeling that way when around Don, whose powers as Dove, often compelled him to acknowledge feelings he did his best to compartmentalize. "I thought I knew what was best for not only Aero, but everyone involved in the situation. I do," Bruce stood and walked across to where Don was sitting.
Don, who was now solely focused on Bruce, felt the need to stand being unsure of what to do or say. This reaction from Bruce was completely unexpected.
"I do regret..." Bruce stopped short of finishing his sentence and just placed his hand on Don's shoulder. Don looked up at him and noticed a spark of sympathy in his eyes. The only thing he could think of to do was nod in understanding.
That seemed to be what Bruce was hoping for because he immediately nodded back then slowly walked out of the room, an air of failure hanging all around him. Just before he fully exited the room he waved for Don to follow him.
J'onn started to phase in and out. As he delved deeper into Preston's mind he felt his control slipping away. He had never felt more unsure in his life. Should he keep going, no matter what the consequences to himself, to help the girl whom he owed so much more than he could give?
He knew Bruce was feeling guilty over all the decisions made regarding Preston, but he wasn't the only one. Thankfully Bruce couldn't read minds. J'onn's agony would remain his own.
J'onn wanted so badly to find answers. How did they share a dream? Suddenly he remembered that was not the first time they were telepathically linked. When Preston was unconscious she spoke to him in his mind. Yes, that was the first time he sensed something was different.
The only thing he was finding as he searched for a reason or a cause for this telepathic link was aberrations he could not quite make out. They seemed familiar to him, similar to ones he sensed before when we was home on Mars telepathically linked with his own people. But that's where the similarity ended. There was also the feeling of a former host, possibly the person who possessed this telepathic power prior to its removal and integration into Preston.
A faint whimper caught his attention. The moment after he heard it, everything in Preston's mind turned red. Realizing it was she that made the noise and it didn't come from inside her mind, he immediately severed the connection with caution.
Quickly catching his breath he placed his hand on Preston's cheek to try to calm her breathing. "Forgive me, I went to far and I fear you weren't ready for it."
"No, "Preston's breathing was laborious and fast. It was a struggle to get to words out. "It's ok. I," She took a few deep breaths. "I just didn't expect…" she trailed off, still gasping for air.
J'onn moved his hand to her back, hoping to hear her lungs to see if there were any respiratory issues he had caused. As he moved his hand an inch, he sensed people right outside the door.
"J'onn, did you," with one last heavy sigh her breathing seemed to return to normal. "Find anything?"
In her mind J'onn replied, "Later young one. You have guests." As the last word left his mouth, a faint knock was heard at the door.
"J'onn, can we come in?" Bruce's voice was barely above a whisper.
Preston looked at J'onn, her eyes asking for the permission to let the visitors in. J'onn just smiled. Excitement rose in her, a feeling she hadn't felt in a very long time. She wanted to see Bruce of course, after all she hadn't seen him in a few days and in that time J'onn and Alfred had said she made incredible progress. They had made her start taking small walks around the mansion and even though every step was agonizing, she did it anyway and was surprised to find that she felt a small sense of pride because of it. But immediately following the feeling of pride always came the other feelings. The darker feelings, doubt and uncertainty. Those were so dominant now. Even though he didn't say so she knew J'onn could sense them there, always in the background. She hid them as best she could because she owed it to them.
J'onn, Alfred and Bruce had given her a second chance at life. As she lay on the floor in the laboratory in Africa she thought that was it, she would never see them again. And what made that feeling worse was that she didn't know at the time if her mission was successful. Knowing now that it was, she often thought she would have been satisfied to give her life even if it helped just one other person.
Caught up in her thoughts, she didn't realize J'onn had left the room and two others had just come in.
"Aero."
Preston looked up at the man who stood in front of her bed. While she recognized him, he seemed to be a shell of the man he once was. But she knew why and she knew he probably thought the same thing of her. "Don," the words came out with a happy sigh. A small smile appeared on her face as she moved to the edge of the bed and pushed herself to stand.
Don moved over to her and enveloped her in a hug. The feelings that passed between them in that moment were felt in the whole room. Bruce who had been standing back to give them a few moments, was taken aback by the sudden shift of the air in the room. Sensing the joy, comfort, familiarity and relief in the room made Bruce uncomfortable. Why did he think keeping Preston from those she cared for would be good for her? What made him even think of tearing her away from them all in the first place?
"Preston."
When she heard her name again she regretfully pulled away from Don and looked up at Bruce. "Yeah," she hadn't expected the tears that were now slowly making their way down her cheeks.
Bruce walked up to them both and put one hand on each of their shoulders. He forced a small smile. "Don is here to take you home. "
Don looked at him confused, but he knew Bruce was telling the truth. Bruce wanted Preston to be with her family.
"Yes, we can catch up on the ride over." Don didn't know how much he needed this. Seeing Aero was cathartic. Yes, she was not the same strong girl she was, but part of that girl, part of Aero remained. If he was honest he was having a hard time focusing on her feelings because he was slightly overwhelmed by his own. "I will wait in the study if that's ok with Bruce. When you're ready come get me."
"Look at you, walking. You made a lot of progress." Bruce looked at Preston with fatherly pride. "I'm sorry I was not here the past few days."
"Bruce," Preston put her hand over his. "I understand. It's ok." She kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you, thank you for letting me go home." She gave him the biggest smile she could muster up.
"Of course. Now that you are doing a little better it's not fair for me to keep you here. Go ahead and get dressed so you can go."
Preston nodded as Bruce exited the room and closed the door. A few steps away were J'onn and Alfred. As he looked at them he suddenly became worried. Their faces told him that while he slept they had found some information that could change everything. His patience for bad news wearing thin he said, "What is it? Is it about Preston?"
Both men looked at each other then back at Bruce. "Sir, she needs surgery. The Immunotoxin is working but only minimally. When Strange removed her wings it was, excuse the expression, a hatchet job. He obviously was not working carefully, but rather greedily. For Preston to live we need to go in and remove the wings fully, all the way down to the bones." Alfred felt very unsure of himself in that moment. "With her wings fully removed we can develop a better treatment for her. Or at least we can in theory."
"J'onn, you agree with this assessment? Does Preston know yet?"
J'onn nodded. "No Bruce we didn't want to say anything until we told you. But perhaps this is a good time for her to go home. She is strong, but we are unsure if she is strong enough to survive this surgery. Being with family might give her the added strength she needs."
"Don is taking her home in a few minutes." Bruce could feel anger and frustration rising in him. He released it by punching the wall beside him. Alfred and Jon looked at each other with a tinge of worry in their expression.
"Sir, I think..."
"It's ok Alfred, I will tell her. I don't want to keep anything else from her. She has the right to make her own decisions, I have no right to make them for her."
"What are the chances of surviving?"
"J'onn didn't tell me the odds. To be honest I don't think he calculated them. Look Preston, I know this is the last thing you want to hear right now but we thought you should know before you went home that way you could…" Bruce didn't know how to say the next words.
"Say goodbye?" Without realizing it, Preston let out a very small chuckle. "Sorry I don't know where that came from. Disbelief I guess. I mean at least this time I would get to say goodbye."
That comment pained Bruce more then Preston could know. She didn't mean it towards him, after all she knew everything that was involved in the mission, that it had to be kept secret and she wasn't allowed to tell anyone she would be gone. But what she didn't know was that Bruce had made those stipulations on his own, they weren't a requirement. To know she could have died without a chance to say goodbye split him apart. He shifted his weight around, attempting to hide the pain he was feeling.
He cleared his throat. "All right Don is waiting for you. Please come back in a few days we need to make some decisions on your treatment and you need to get more of the immunotoxin." He stiffened up as she leaned in to hug him.
"Thank you for everything," she whispered into his ear which was followed by a quick kiss on the cheek.
Preston's heart jumped as they turned the familiar corner of the driveway where the Queen Mansion would now be in full view. She had never been more excited to see a building in her life. It's true what they said, home is where the heart is and as they got ever closer to the door she felt her heart starting to resemble what it was over a year ago when she was home last.
"Don thank you so much." As the car stopped she started to open the door and move her legs to get out, but Don lightly grabbed her arm.
"Aero, let me help you, your still very weak."
"I have to do this myself," She begged. "Please?" She was touched by his concern, but she wanted to enter her own home on her own terms. "And I'm not Aero anymore," Her head dropped slightly, and Don could sense the overwhelming sadness behind her statement.
"It was good to see you, Preston." He made sure he put extra emphasis on her name. "Welcome home." With that Don let her get out of the car and watched until she slowly and with much difficulty, made her way to the front door of the mansion. Once she was there, he casually drove away.
Preston felt nervous as she lifted her hand to knock on the door. The reality of the situation hit her like a ton of bricks. She hadn't been home in over a year. Would they be ok with her coming home? The decision was made by Preston over a year ago not to tell Ollie when she left, would he still be mad, or would he and Dinah be just as overjoyed to see her as she was at thought of seeing them?
Before she knew it, her hand was making a rapping noise on the door. A moment later the butler answered the door. He immediately recognized her. "Ms. Preston! Come in, come in. Let me go get Mrs. Lance." He quickly ushered her inside.
The walls seemed taller then before and the room was slightly intimidating in its enormity. Just as Preston started to walk around the foyer, touching and running her fingers over every picture and trinket, she heard a gasp from the staircase. Preston looked up to see Dinah running down to her, her cheeks wet with tears.
"Preston." Dinah wrapped her arms around her neck as Preston wrapped hers around Dinah's waist. "Oh, you beautiful girl." She stroked her hair as they embraced. "Oliver!" Dinah yelled as loud as she could without activating her sonic scream. "Oliver get out here now!" Her plea had a lightness to it, an air of joy she hadn't heard from herself in quite some time, and she knew Oliver hadn't either.
From across the foyer they could hear a grumble behind the closed office door. When the door opened they could make out what was being said. "Every damn time Dinah I'm in a meeting something interrupts…" Oliver stopped short and his hand shot up to his mouth, covering it in disbelief. He grabbed onto the small table next to him to try and keep his balance. "Is that really you?"
All Preston could manage to respond with was a nod. At this point the tears were streaming down her face quickly. She could barely make out the man who was in front of her.
"Oh my girl!" With those words Oliver closed the distance between them and grabbed both women in the biggest embrace he could muster. As they all clung to each other, they felt themselves slipping to the ground. Neither of them was sure who's legs gave out first, but now sitting on the ground in the foyer of the mansion they refused to let go of one other for fear of losing each other again. "Tough it out my girl, this is fatherly love crushing your innards." With those words, Oliver buried his face in Preston's hair and grabbed onto his wife's hand as tightly as he could.
"What the heck is going on out there?"
All three heads lifted and looked back toward the office. As soon as Preston saw him her breath caught in her throat. He looked more handsome then she remembered. A small smile crept up into her face, amidst the tears that freely fell from being reunited with Oliver and Dinah. She squeezed both tightly before standing up, a bit unsteadily.
She smiled at Wally, who hadn't taken his eyes off her since he recognized who she was. Slowly, taking small, uncertain steps, she walked closer to Wally. She couldn't tell what he was feeling, her own feelings were too overwhelming. The joy she had thought she lost forever was slowly creeping back at seeing him standing before her. Finally, she began to hope, hope she might be able to retrieve a small resemblance of who she was before, before the pain, before the disappointment, before Aero died.
It took Wally only seconds to recognize the girl now standing in front of him. "Preston?" He remembered what she looked like, but she looked very different now. She was thinner, and the spark was gone from her eyes. Wally was so confused. He didn't know how he felt or how he was supposed to feel. Part of him was angry, but another part was relived and happy. He needed to make sense of what was going on, so he did what he knew best, he ran.
