A/N: Very appropriate for April Fool's ne? Thanks to all reviewers! And the beginning is inspired by a scene from Pushing Daisies. Which isn't mine either. *mopes* Also there is some swearing and hints of violence.


Bouquets and Bombshells

"…and Yukari's sleeping with Amano again. Not that I'm jealous, I've seen his running backwards and forwards so many times I'm glad I never dated him. Nor do I like the idea of Yukari going though it either. But how can I tell my best friend that the man of her dreams is an arse? How can I forget, he's also engaged to someone else. It won't end happily."

She sighed and straightened her dress, not bothering to look in the mirror at the tragedy she'd no doubt witness. Instead she chose the minutely better option of looking out the small window out onto the rainy streets below.

But the world outside didn't hold her attention for long with its similarly bleak population as she turned back to her audience, no longer caring whether her dress wrinkled at the back. Not that anyone would see it anyway.

"Where was I? Oh yes. I've intruded on your space, and forgive me for it. Really. I suppose you don't want anyone coming in here and moping around your domain do you?" A mocking smile slid across her face at her listener's expression. She wasn't too impressed herself either.

Her fingers traced the invisible hems of the skirt, trying her best not to fist her hands in the pristine silk and crease the front as well as the back of her dress. Her eyes went to the carved wooden clock, noting that she had only a short while left to confess her troubles before she had to go out there. Pulling away from the monotonous movement of the hands, she reverted her gaze back to her confessor with similarly shaped eyes, but they were blue.

"Back to me." Her expression twisted into a grimace attempting to be a smile which she ended quickly at her recipient's gaze. "Sorry. Well Yukari has Amano to worry about. And when he's not skirt chasing he's trying to encourage Allen. If you've ever had the disadvantage of meeting Goldilocks' male incarnation then you'd know he needs no encouragement whatsoever."

Words trailing into silence, she let the Chapel bells ring to signify the arrival of midday. Around the country old women would be endeavouring to kneel and pray the necessary amount of prayers to the gods as the Angelus bell rang. It stung to remember when she would fall to her knees in devotion and whisper the prayers in time with her mother. A childhood full of kneeling had led to many bruises. Ones she still had to erase.

It was only when she flinched at the pain she realized she had dug her apparently sharp heel into her calf and scraped the skin. Of course she would bleed, and ruin all of this. Not that it was such an extravagant occasion to ruin.

Her wedding dress fell a short way past her knees, not like the gowns she had seen in magazines or her mother had forced her to try that ghosted along the floor, but it was new. It was the one thing he had insisted she get, refusing to marry her in a tank top and skirt or cheap sundress. Superstitious git.

Her virginal shoes with a small heel were borrowed from Yukari, who had no idea what was really happening—as was needed—but she keenly felt the loss of a bridesmaid or a friend to watch her on the supposed most important day of her life. The ring would be his grandmother's. A ring that had been passed from one generation to the next. Something old she thought to herself.

Her witness tilted their head at her expression and seemed to say, well your mood's blue. So it's all covered. She would have laughed at the idea but her throat was too dry. She swallowed a few times and the humour had gone. So she carried on with her confession.

"That's why I'm here really. My parents and society dictates that I should happily marry Allen sodding Schezar with eminent gratitude to him. I'd rather take crack and I remember the health class videos. Allen seems to enjoy this idea, of marriage that is, not drugs, he apparently finds me intriguing. I doubt that'll last once the honeymoon ends."

Memories of recent arguments fell like a blunt trauma to her head as she screwed her eyes up, trying not to cry. Foregoing the circumstances, she was going to be married and she would not cry come hell or high water.

She broke off from her outpouring of grievances and ran two slightly shaking fingers along the back of her calf and found that the bleeding had stopped. Twisting her ankle, she adjusted the strap of the shoe and examined the rather small wound that produced more pain than the visual evidence gave. The other individual in the room cleared their throat and Hitomi smiled sadly.

"It's odd that for once someone actually wants to listen. Yukari won't hear it that Amano's a bastard. My parents won't believe that I don't love Allen or that I'd strangle him with his hair and have it filmed as a momento. Then Allen, Mr. Biggest Ego on Gaea would sooner cut his damn hair than think I found him anything less than irresistible. But that's not the point. The point is why I'm here. My family made a deal with people. Allen's family have invested money in my father's business and in return Allen gets me as his heir-provider."

A car horn below and a torrent of swear words silenced her again and she smiled at the rage expressed. People would listen to that driver on the street regardless of caring, the angry person would have their audience's attention. Something she had never gotten.

"It all sounds fairly simple right? All I would have to do is run away. My parents don't appear to care for my welfare so they wouldn't bat an eyelid? No. They want their cash flow kept afloat and access to Schezar privileges. Meaning the money laundering they all do would remain locked tight between them. If I tried to run away I'd be dragged back and beaten into submission. Poor Millerna."

Her eyes left the interrogating gaze of her spectator and swivelled back to the window, then to her arm watching the shadows of raindrops adorn her bare skin. A far more appropriate garment than necklaces, earrings and bracelets she thought. Gritting her teeth she raised her arm and traced the raindrops, trying to guess when they'd connect to one another.

"I don't blame her sleeping with Allen. She's loved him for years. I can't say I understand it, but she does. Not that I condone her breaking Dryden's heart. He's far better than Allen. Aside from his thieving national treasures. Not that I should know. But each to their own. And her father-in-law's a terror with his above the law status. Still, I had to get out from everything. That's where Folken came in—"

She cut off her sentence as the room coolly echoed with a knock to the heavy wooden door. Standing up, it took effort not to try and press the wrinkles in her dress with her hands or curl her hands into them further as she walked to the door. Opening it, an old lady appeared with a box outstretched. "—Miss, the item you requested." Hitomi smiled at the woman and reached out for the box, but the old lady scowled and murmured apologetically, "I'm sorry Miss. But it's the only one I could find."

Hitomi shook her head gently and took the box, squeezing the weather-beaten fingers in her own. "Thank you very much. I didn't feel the need for it but my fiancé is being quite demanding." Her expression brightened as the old lady smiled at her, making her stomach twinge with an angered ache at the idea she was getting married without any family, no mother, grandmother or Yukari. Coming back to the old lady she muttered sheepishly, "I hope you didn't get too wet."

The old lady laughed so uproariously, Hitomi could almost see the young woman in her, grinning at her own friends or at a young man. Her hand was patted by the darker one and a beam extended onto the woman's face, "Miss, you're getting married all by yourself and you're concerned about me. This is your day. Focus on yourself. And congratulations. I wish you many years of happiness."

Before she could run into the room and take out money from her purse, the old lady walked away with a calm and rather youthful gait for her appearance. Shutting the door behind her, Hitomi wondered if this small Chapel had ghosts come to life and run out for veils for unprepared brides. Rolling her eyes at her imagination she placed the box on the table and opened it, removing the tissue paper carefully.

Despite her earlier words that she had no need of a veil or bouquet, her dark haired and apparently dark tempered fiancé flat out refused the negligence of such things. So a bouquet of lilies had been cut from the Chapel garden and placed in the room she had dressed in. Carefully taking out the veil from the box, she couldn't help the childlike beam that spread across her face at the delicate semi-transparent material.

It was the first moment she had actually felt excitement about her impending nuptials. Her distaste for the well-fitted gown fell to the wayside as she stepped in front of the mirror and slid the comb on the veil into her hair snugly. The white swirls complimented her wavy hair she thought.

All in all, the dress wasn't too bad. An array of thin straps on each shoulder spreading out like a fan, matched with a modest but flattering neckline. A seam under her breasts and another just above her hips, accentuating them in a good way unlike many other garments she had. Then the gown flowed out just past her knees, the glossy material whispering as she moved.

Looking past her own reflection she met the gaze of the other in the room and smiled sheepishly,

"I know. I shouldn't complain. A beautiful dress, delicate veil, pretty flowers which my fiancé insisted on; not an occurrence that would happen with Allen even on a parallel world. Where was I?" her eyes darted back to the clock, her time slowly running out with her confessor she inhaled deeply.

"Yes. Folken met me during an infernal dinner my parents staged to impress the Schezars and every nosy busybody they considered important. It was stupid of me to be in the garden on my own, and even worse that I didn't get up and run the second I caught sight of his infernal blonde hair. But I stayed, thinking he and his friends wouldn't see me. I listened to their words, their plans." She spat nauseously recalling the bile that appetized her that night.

Hitomi knew she was a masochist and so turned back to scrutinize the image reproduced before her. Her eyes went instinctively to her neck where the purple tones had faded well enough that the make up worked. And the lighting in the Chapel was intimate, so no one would be able to see the slight change in her skin tone, having to borrow tan-a-holic Yukari's foundation.

Clenching her fists then releasing them and relaxing her tensed posture, she raised her gaze to her veil and set about fixing it unnecessarily. Inhaling like a sufferer of the oxygen starving Bends she spoke to her confessor, not wanting to meet their judging gaze,

"So they discussed their political scheme to takeover the current presidency. Murder was mentioned, or temporarily poisoning a politician or something and I gasped. Of course our garden acoustics are excellent so they found me and Allen showed the side of his family I wasn't meant to see until after our wedding."

Hitomi knew it was odd but she laughed anyway at the next memory, "Some silver haired cousin of his, demon-like, grabbed my neck and started squeezing, not in a way to scare me, but permanently silence me. Not that in my horror I was all that surprised. There's a litter of accidents that trail behind Allen. I don't know of any fatalities but I suppose there's always a first time for everything. But then Folken knocked over a plant pot and scared the bastards away."

Turning round she looked at her confessor and smiled gently,

"I should be grateful Allen didn't take me with him. Apparently thinking isn't his strongest point. So Folken appeared and asked if I needed help. I suppose with purple fingerprint indents on my neck and a blue face I looked like it. He said he had heard everything the men had said and if I didn't leave…"

Sighing, Hitomi swivelled on her borrowed heels and walked to the table with her bouquet, tracing the skin like petals and blood coloured pollen.

She placed her hands flat on the table, "…Well you can guess what would have happened. For some reason I let Folken take me away. Everyone at the dinner seemed to secretly scorn him under their fawning and fake respect so I trusted him, dim-witted I know. But I met his wife and they explained how they would help me by yes, marrying me to someone who could protect me. Apparently Van has an important and more importantly respected status in society and will protect me from Allen and…and my family." She ended in a whisper, hating the guilt that travelled like lactic acid, gripping her lungs.

Her hand closed around the small but pungent bouquet as the room once again paled at the knocking of the door. Hitomi straightened and inhaled deeply before releasing to bouquet and running to her bag, yelling "Just a minute." Rifling through, she found the clear lipgloss and applied a generous coat squinting at the mirror and making sure she looked ok.

It struck Hitomi that even though she was getting away from Allen she was still going to marry a man she didn't love, someone she knew even less than Allen and yet was essentially pledging her life to. Why hadn't Folken arranged for her to enter a Convent? Smoothing her dress once more, she went back to the bouquet and then turned back to her witness, her confessor.

"Thank you for listening to me. I know you're just a cat but you stayed and listened, which is more than anyone else has done for me. So I'm grateful."

A wry smile on her face, she opened the door to an altar serving boy who looked like he had barely caught puberty by the skin of his teeth. Surprised she wasn't nervous or scared shitless by the walk she had to make, she smiled brightly – how a blushing nervous bride should and had to clear her throat to bring the boy back to Gaea and look away.

Was she really that pretty? Or had he never seen a bride before?

Wordlessly the boy reddened like a traffic light, passing by green and yellow and gestured along the offshoot towards the main aisle. Hitomi nodded and once again felt a tickle of astonishment at how she felt no dismay there was no arm to link through to guide her to the altar and her fiancé. Two deep breaths and Hitomi walked forwards slowly, keeping her eyes ahead as she stepped into the main aisle of the Chapel and turned towards the altar.

Her gaze caught the dim lighting of candles surrounding the altar. The darkened Chapel despite it only being midday eased her embarrassment. She had expected a registry office but her fiancé who she only knew as Van had said they would get married properly in the Chapel under the eyes of God. Hitomi caught the back of his obviously tailored suit, noting to herself that if Yukari were here she would be whispering about her future husband's idyllic backside.

She carried on in her measured, delicate fashion noticing his back swivel as he turned to her but her focus was getting to his side.

All her insecurities landed heavily on her shoulders and pecked at her maliciously. What if her parents walked in? What if Allen walked in? Had she been reported missing? Would she bring harm to Van? To Folken and Sora? To their delightful twins who would have made adorable flower girls?

Her hands tightened round the bouquet and she expertly held back her wince as the decorated cellophane round the flowers slashed a thin scratch on her index finger. More blood, that was all she needed. But her thoughts of crimson soaked white dresses and bullet ridden statues ceased as she stood shoulder to shoulder with her fiancé who turned to her.

She smiled up at him and inhaled almost painfully as his gaze met hers. He seemed to stare at her with an intensity she had never seen before on any man and his eyes gave the illusion as if they wanted to ingrain her image her entirely. Blushing she accepted his outstretched hand and tried her best to listen to the Priest as Van matched her unending exposed stare.

Hitomi wasn't unlike other women, she had often dreamed of a perfect lavish wedding as a child. Changing to an elopement with a rough and ready Prince Charming, stealing her away from her parents; she didn't know Van well enough to categorize him. She did know that she owed him her life and for that she would do all she could to help him.

When she had pictured her wedding, she had imagined getting irritated during the ceremony, being impatient to get to the rings and the all important Kiss. Obviously Van had picked the short version as they were swiftly served communion, then the priest asked them to repeat after him. A glinting gold band was placed onto her hand and before she realized it, the priest spoke his gentle words,

"You may kiss the bride."

Tuning back into reality she watched him lift her veil slowly, only adding to her sudden restoration of nerves as her gaze fell to his rather appealing mouth. Was he really going to kiss her? Really? Her eyes fluttered shut in panic, feeling sick at the apparent oncoming gesture. Would she be expected to respond? Would he use tongue?

His warm and rather large hands cupped her chin, raising her face towards him, her eyes still shut. And it happened. His kiss was tender, heartstoppingly unsure and yet it sent a tingle down her as her hands gripped his arms for balance when he finally pulled back. Meeting his gaze wasn't all that uncomfortable and he smiled so wonderfully at her Hitomi felt that maybe she had done the right thing.

She had to blush when the priest coughed for their attention. Van didn't seem embarrassed as he took her hand – the adorned one in his own, and he had a rather stupidly happy smile on his face. It definitely felt like a good omen that her stomach quivered at his expression rather than tense with nausea.

As the priest mentioned signing the marriage register and certificate, she let her husband respond, still dazed from the whole thing. Her reverie only expanded when he turned his delicious gaze back to her and smiled wonderfully, touching her cheek,

"You look beautiful."

Her bridal blush deepened extensively as she managed to murmur a meek, "Thank you."

It took her a few seconds to realize his smile had gone, replaced with something else, something worrying. Apprehension?

Her growing and abrupt shift to panic halted briefly when a loud meow echoed along the Chapel's main aisle and the priest smiled as he brought out the official documents and laid them on the altar before them.

"Merle loves a good wedding. We think she brings good luck. Any wedding she's invited herself to – the marriage is always a happy, long lasting one. I'm sure there is no doubt of that Fanel-sama." Hitomi saw the dry smile emerge on the sinful lips of her fiancé, no husband.

It would take a while to adjust to that. Mrs. Fanel. The name sounded powerful, it rang out demanding respect. But before she did, she turned to the ginger tabby cat sat calmly behind them in the centre of the aisle watching them with large blue eyes. Hitomi smiled and nodded to her confessor. Strange as it seemed, the presence of the unnervingly human-like cat soothed her nerves.

Van squeezed her hand gently and led her towards the marriage register, the true start of her new life. As Hitomi turned she swore the cat—no—Merle smiled at her.

Feeling relaxed amidst the utter oddity of her situation she watched Van sign the register carefully and with a rather aristocratic signature before handing the pen to her. She could feel him watch her sign her new name with deliberate care, not wanting to make her first married signature a mess.

However as she finished and set the pen down, the way he exhaled—as if in deep relief, Hitomi felt the tendrils of panic curl round her again as she turned and met her newly wed husband's nervous gaze.

"Hitomi, there's something I need to tell you."

Oh no. Her parents had set her up. Allen had set her up. As she felt his now slightly clammy palm enclose over hers, she mentally prepared herself for running in heels. Her swiftly sensitive ears caught the sound of the priest entering the sacristy, leaving them alone in the Chapel. She wondered if her sudden connection to Merle would help her in anyway to escape.

It appeared Van could read her worry or saw her face drain of colour as he smiled worriedly, "You're not in danger. Nor am I in any way connected to your parents. It's more something I've kept from you. I—"

As Hitomi waited for her stomach to mimic a volcano the back door of the Chapel burst open and she saw more than felt her hand gripped tighter by Van's.

She exhaled in sudden relief as Folken appeared, looking winded, and rather angry? She turned in sync with her husband towards her now brother-in-law, curious to his dishevelled appearance and the fury on his face as he boomed, making Hitomi wince,

"What the hell did you think you were doing Van? Are you completely retarded? Do you know how shit scared I've been? We went to the registry office, only to find you not there and no mention of a booking by you."

Hitomi watched in mute confusion as Van pulled an arm round her, as if she was the target of Folken's anger. Looking up at him she saw concern and defiance mixed on his face as he replied tonelessly,

"I wanted it to be private."

"Private? Are you off your head? Are you aware that Father's going to skin you alive?"

She felt her husband tense at the comment and worry pounded in her skull as she breathed,

"I'm sorry Van. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have gotten you into this mess, it's all my fault."

Expecting pity or worse, sympathy Hitomi was shocked at the remorseful expression on her husband's face. The sad smile only staggered her further as he spoke quietly,

"No. I'm sorry. You've got nothing to apologize for. I haven't told you everything, everything you should have known before we got married. I—"

Once again Folken prevented his brother from revealing the truth with an uproarious laugh that crashed against the pillars of the main aisle, sending cool and calm Merle darting into a pew and under it. Was this a bad omen?

"Oh God, you haven't told her have you?" Bursting into further laughter, Folken gasped in between them, "You are an idiot Van. You know that?"

The arm wrapped round her bare shoulders tightened and she wondered whether it was rude of her to feel attracted to him by the sudden growl vibrating in his chest as he pulled her closer and whispered,

"Hitomi please don't be mad. I didn't tell you because I didn't want to scare you. It really doesn't matter that much. It's nothing really—"

"—Stop babbling moron and tell the poor girl." Folken snorted, turning away from them as if to give them privacy.

"Van," Hitomi managed to find her nerve and her voice as she whispered back, moving away slightly so she could look at him, look not stare, "Whatever it is I don't mind. As long as it doesn't involve my parents or their circle of friends." His boyish and very alluring smile reassured her slightly, not that it eased the curiosity gnawing at her. He breathed in almost dramatically as he opened his mouth to speak.

Perpetuating the cliché once more the Chapel doors flung open and a very elegant looking woman stood in the centre before striding up the aisle purposefully. Hitomi felt ever a damsel in distress and gripped the shirt pocket of her husband in panic who seemed incapable of performing any responding role.

The woman stopped before them and burst into tears joyously.

"You're married! Look at you! My son, married!" Hitomi was pulled from his grip and into the woman's excited arms, "I have a daughter-in-law! Welcome to the family Hitomi. We shall have a lot to talk about I know!"

Managing to smile unsurely, she turned to Van for any confirmation of the woman's words but saw his gaze had landed on someone else, apparently someone he had not expected by the shock on his face.

"Father?" came from his lips and Hitomi attempted to look past her emotional and apparently overjoyed mother-in-law to her foreboding father-in-law.

"So you pulled a fast one on us Van. I'm disappointed in you. Are you that ashamed?" her stomach tightened uncomfortably. She was getting Van into all this trouble.

As her mother-in-law moved from her to embrace her son, Hitomi saw the face of her father-in-law and stilled in shock. She wasn't even capable of turning back to Van to ask him, only barely murmuring,

"Your father's the Fanelian King?" In her heightened state of astonishment, she wasn't entirely sure if she was going to faint.


Theme 10: Secret

Words: 4,402


Hitomi straightened as her ears caught his snort.

"Come on. You're just as enchanted as she is." He gestured towards the Royal couple dancing with one another in the empty ballroom, truly epitomizing a fairytale ending.

She rolled her eyes and turned to him, glaring as she adjusted her maid's apron,

"Rubbish. It's an arranged marriage. They'll grow to hate one another." She avoided the smile in his eyes or the smirk on his face, surprised when he stepped in front of her,

"Will you dance with me," his coal black bangs brushing her forehead as he whispered, "Your Highness?"

She blanched in shock then blushed at his proximity but accepted his hand as he twirled her gently on the step he was supposed to be sweeping as a lowly stable groom, "Of course, Your Majesty." His smile reached his mouth this time as their shared secrets were momentarily forgotten.


A/N: Thanks for reading! I always love to hear comments. Calls for continuations do not go unheard. My beta would do unspeakable things to Van if I didn't. :(

Thanks go to:

Lil' Dinky – Happy I made you laugh and glad you enjoyed Merle's mini-fic.

thepinkmartini – Dark confession booth huh? :D *evil grin* Thanks! More A/U to come.

Tanwen Whitefire – Thanks! And Van and Hitomi were 'ghosts' for Merle's wedding ^^

jossi-31 – Cheers!

Kaitou-Shadow

settingsunrisingmoon – Cheers! *blushes*

lesamoureux – Thank you! Still V/H even in death!

False-Image – Lol yes. And the bits at the end are separate from the main fic. ^^

Niello – Aww a poll! *blushes* I feel loved!

Doctor Kiba – *giggles* Well done! And glad you enjoyed!

chibimimi – Thanks and glad you liked it!

ranmyaku-neko – Thanks! And yeah V/H all the way! ^^

Jav-chan­ – Noted! And yes they are cute aren't they?

Cloudancer – Thank you very much! And glad you liked!