Chapter 9

Mary sees Angela as she exits the elevator. She runs to her old friend and embraces her. "I'm so sorry it took this with Charles for us to make contact again," Angela rasps as she turns to hug Scott as well. Jane smiles at how loving and genuine her mother is.

Sometimes she makes her so proud and she knows why she loves her so much. Jane looks at Mary, "Any word on Casey?"

Scott and Mary exchange glances as Jane watches from one to the other. Uh - oh. Here's the cop gut again, sensing not good. Jane grips her mother's arm as Angela squeezes her hand back.

"Jane, he is awake, there is no easy way to say this." Scott smooths his hair without making eye contact with Jane.

"He said," Scott sighs, "he said he doesn't want to see you."

Jane stepped back deflated. "I thought he asked for me, wh - what uh ah happened?"

Mary looks in Jane's direction, but past her. "I think he wants to see you, but when he came too, he was very agitated at the idea of you coming. I don't know what to say, Jane, we have to keep him calm," explains Mary.

Jane is visibly torn. "Well, can I see him, just see him, just for a minute? I need him to tell me he doesn't want to see me." Jane takes on a confrontational stance.

Scott relents, "I'll see if he is awake and if he'll see you. Wait here".

Jane paces, raking her hair and chewing on her lip, she looks at her mom. "What the hell, Ma, he can't turn my emotions on and off like a tap".

Angela strokes Jane's arm. "I know baby, I - I'm sorry." Jane pulls away and turns her eyes to the ceiling, to keep the tears at bay. She thinks how much she'd love to hash this out with Maura right now. Maura would do that little quirk thing with her head, furrow her brow and do some google mouth analysis on Jane's mental state. At that thought, she couldn't help herself, she smiled.

She turned all business again as Scott reentered the room. "Charles said he has two minutes to see you." Scott's eyes avert at Jane's stare.

"Oh, how generous." Jane remarks as she rolls her eyes.

Angela looks at her daughter with clenched jaw. "Jane Clem -" a stern look comes across the detectives face as she points at her mother.

"Don't," Jane retorts. Scott nervously looks at both ladies, wondering if this is a good idea, when Jane nods at him to lead on. Angela and Mary watch as Jane and Scott hurry down the hospital corridor to Casey's room.

As they approach the Intensive Care door, Scott slows and motions Jane to enter, Jane is nervous, rubbing her hands together as she looks at the bed and its occupant. Casey is staring at the ceiling, he doesn't break that stare as Jane approaches. She goes to sit and a strong voice utters, "Don't," Jane looks at Casey's face and remains standing, rubbing the scars on her hands.

"I'm here because you asked for me," she rasps.

Casey never moves his stare from the ceiling. "I was unconscious Jane, I didn't know what I said," Casey states through clenched teeth, eyes still on the ceiling.

Jane could feel her composure failing. "Casey, I'm here, we can do this," she assures through tears.

"Jane, I didn't want you to see me like this and there is no us." He stares intently at the ceiling and blinks back tears of his own.

Jane drops into the chair by his bed and reaches for his hand. "Please let me be there, let me help, let me in." She wrinkled her brow and tries to get Casey to look at her.

He pulls his hand away. "Please leave," without making eye contact.

Jane rises and looks down at him with watery eyes. "I love you," and then she turns to leave. As she exits the room. Casey turns his head to watch her leave as a stray tear trickles down his face.

She doesn't reenter the room where Angela and Casey's parents are. She gives it a side glance as she heads for the elevator. Now is not the time, she teeters on the edge of anger and hurt. How dare he treat me like that, she thinks. I told him it doesn't matter, that I would be there for him, that I love him. Tears start as emotions overtake her. The elevator doors open and she impatiently waits to the occupants to empty, before getting on. She presses the third floor and turns to see she is not alone.