"Eva?" Bucky asked softly, gently rousing the brown haired girl from her sleep. It had been almost two hours since she cried herself to sleep in his lap after he found her collapsed and bloody on the bathroom floor. While she was sleeping, Bucky took it upon himself to remove the tiny shards of glass from her knuckles. "Can you wake up for me, hon?" He asked, gently running his hand through her hair.
"Mmn..." Eva groaned in her groggy haze. Her eyes fluttered open, and she looked up at Bucky. A bittersweet smile spread across his lips as he caressed her cheek. Her eyes were red and slightly puffy.
"That's my girl." He pushed a few strands of hair away from her face. "How are you feeling?" He asked. Eva stretched her legs out, and stretched her arms over her head. She flexed her hands, and inhaled sharply in pain.
"Ow!" She looked at her hand, covered in dried blood. "Oh god..." Her heart pounded in her chest. "What did I do?" She looked at Bucky, panic in her eyes as she trembled.
"Shh... It's OK. You're alright, Eva." He wrapped his arms around her, and held her close to his chest. "Do you remember anything that happened?" He asked her.
"Bits and pieces." Eva replied after a moment. Bucky kissed the top of her head before he released her.
"Let's get those wounds cleaned up. I don't want you getting an infection." Bucky said as they both stood up from the couch. Eva held her bloodied hand up to her chest, and walked into the kitchen with Bucky. He turned on the warm water, and gently took Eva's hand. "Sorry. It's gonna sting." He apologized and moved behind her.
"I know..." Eva grimaced and gritted her teeth. Bucky gently held her hand under the running water, and Eva cried out and clenched her other hand into a tight fist. She tried to jerk her hand away from the water, but Bucky held it there a few moments longer. When he finally turned off the water, he kissed the top of her head.
"I'm sorry." Bucky apologized again as he moved to the side of her and gently kissed her wet hand. He grabbed a clean dish cloth and gently dabbed the blood away. Eva bit her lip and looked down.
"No. Don't apologize." She shook her head. "I'm the one who should apologize. I shouldn't have put you through - "
"Eva, hush." Bucky interrupted her, placing his metal index finger over her lips. "You didn't put me through anything. Granted, I was a little scared. But I was just glad you were OK." He said, gently brushing his cold fingers over her cheek. Eva looked up at his beautiful blue eyes, and felt a tear roll down her cheek.
"I...I don't know why you stay with me." Eva admitted. Bucky sighed, frowning at her.
"Because I love you. All of you. Isn't that reason enough?" He asked, placing the dish cloth on the counter as he wrapped his arms around her. "You're beautiful. Everything about you is worth loving." Bucky released her, and turned around to grab a roll of gauze out of the medicine cabinent. Eva couldn't find the words to respond. Bucky turned back around, and gently wrapped her hand.
"Bucky..." Her voice cracked with the threat of tears.
"Come here, aнгел." Bucky took her uninjured hand, and led her back to the couch. He sat down and patted the seat next to him. Eva sat down and pulled her legs up under her. "Will you talk to me about what happens?" He asked. Eva felt her jaw drop in surprise.
"You mean... When I have an episode?" She whispered, gently running her fingers over her bandage.
"Yes. Is that OK?" Bucky asked, turning to face her. His expression seemed so concerned, and Eva took a deep breath. "I kind of understand what happens. I mean, you know about my episodes. It seems kind of similar." He reached out and gently placed his hand on her knee.
"I just have voices in my head." Eva looked down. "I have two voices in my head that aren't mine. They tell me I'm useless, and that nobody cares about me." There was pain in her voice, and Bucky just wanted scoop her up in his arms and never let her go. "One voice is really...aggressively mean. And the other is mean...but in a nice way?" Eva shrugged. "It's hard to explain. Like, the tone of their voice is sweet and innocent. But they say really horrible things." She wiped away a few tears that rolled down her cheeks.
"What else do they say?" Bucky asked gently. Eva looked up at him, staring into those beautiful blue eyes again.
"I don't deserve to be happy. Nobody wants me." Eva bit her lip and tore her gaze away from Bucky before she spoke again. "They try to tell me that you're a liar and you don't really care about me." She whispered. The words pained her to say, and she couldn't bring herself to look at him.
"Eva, my beautiful girl." Bucky pulled her to him, and she leaned against his chest. His heart was beating against her ear, and she listened to the steady rhythm of it as he breathed. "I care about you with every fiber of my being." He held his arms around her, as if he wanted to shield her from the world. She brought her head up off his chest and looked at him again.
"I don't understand how you can see me as a beautiful person. Or even as an angel." Eva sighed. "Angels are beautiful and pure. They have wings that support them. I'm not beautiful, or pure." There was a tone of disgust in her voice as she berated herself. "Look, Bucky." She held her wrist out so he could see. There were numerous scars on her pale skin. Nearly all of them had healed, but the lines they left behind were still there. The pain etched into her skin; her self-inflicted punishment. "How can you call that beautiful?" Bucky gently took her wrist in his metal hand.
"You are more than your scars, Eva." He gently traced over the scars with his fingers before he places a kiss on her wrist. "You have intelligence," he moved his hand to stroke her head, "a beautiful voice," he gently traced his finger down her neck, "and this beautiful heart." He placed his hand over her heart and smiled at her. "That's what I love about you. You have such a big heart, and there's a place for me in there." Eva looked at him, not knowing how to respond.
"I..." Her voice caught in her throat when she tried to reply.
"Let me be your wings." Bucky said, staring into her eyes. "Just like you are mine." He pulled her to him again and placed a long and sweet kiss on her lips. Slowly, he pulled away.
"Thank you..." Eva said, blushing up at him. "Thank you for...saving me." Bucky tapped her playfully on the nose and smiled.
"I think it's you who saved me." He replied, and Eva giggled.
"Let's agree to disagree." She suggested, kissing his cheek. Bucky chuckled and nodded as he pulled her into another long and deep kiss.
