I'm sorry for the delay; I will try to keep up with updates again now. Thank you for the amazing feedback for the last chapter. Let me know what you think about this one!


Olivia had never said the words out loud. She had never admitted it to anyone, not even to herself. Now, her darkest secret was out; she'd shared it with a man she barely knew. He was looking at her – wide-eyed and pale, completely shocked. His hand had dropped from hers, and with that tiny, involuntary movement, Fitz had unknowingly confirmed all of her fears.

No man would ever want to touch her after this.

Her emotional pain was beginning to turn physical, and Olivia felt sick to her stomach. Her head was pounding and her heart was breaking in her chest. She couldn't breathe. With every sob she tried to catch her breath, but it wasn't working. Suddenly, two strong arms wrapped around her petite body and she was lifted into Fitz' lap. He cradled her like a small child, enclosing her entire being in his embrace. Olivia curled into his body, completely unaware of her surroundings and her actions – simply following her instinct to trust this man to keep her safe.

Fitz was rocking her gently, whispering nonsense into her ear in a futile attempt to calm her. Her tears were soaking his shirt, but it didn't matter. He'd hoped Olivia would let him hold her, because as much as he needed to help her, he also needed to feel her close to save his own heart from breaking completely. Small, delicate hands were grasping his shirt with a force that made Olivia's knuckles turn white. He had never witnessed a panic attack, but now Fitz was wondering if it was happening to Olivia at this moment.

"Shh.", he soothed desperately. "I need you to try and take a deep breath for me, Liv."

At first, Olivia didn't react. Fitz wasn't sure if she could even hear him, or if she had blocked out the world around her completely. He let her sob against his chest for a few more minutes before trying to get her attention again.

"Come on, beautiful. Breathe for me."

Finally, she seemed to hear him. Olivia tried to calm down, forcing herself to fill her lungs with air.

"That's good, Liv.", Fitz encouraged her. "One more time. I know you can do it."

She focused on his voice and on the steady up and down of his hand on her back. Slowly, her senses seemed to be returning to her. Olivia could taste the saltiness of her tears on her lips and feel their wetness on her face. She realized she was clinging to him, but she didn't make a move to leave his arms because she was convinced this would be the last time he'd ever hold her. The tears hadn't stopped and the pain didn't go away, but Olivia could finally breathe again.

"Can you look at me?", Fitz asked her with the most gentle voice.

No. Olivia did not want to look at him. Before this she'd seen respect, appreciation, and even desire in his eyes. Now she was afraid all she'd see would be pity. She didn't move.

"Sweetheart, I need you to look at me so I know you're okay.", he tried again, desperate to look into her eyes again.

She didn't want to pull away, or move, or ever leave her spot in his arms. She didn't want to face reality. She didn't want to face him. She didn't want to be a victim of rape anymore. But Olivia knew that neither of those were an option for her, so she slowly lifted her heavy head from its spot on his Fitz' chest.

"There you are.", he smiled, even though he looked devastated.

Fitz moved one hand from her back and brought it to her face, using his thumb to wipe some of her tears away. He was so stunningly gentle that new tears began leaking from Olivia's eyes immediately. There was such a mix of emotions playing in his, but the one she couldn't find was pity. He didn't look disgusted with her, and it made it just a little bit easier to face him. Olivia braced herself for his questions, but for a long time they simply sat together – her grasping his shirt, him wiping her tears with the utmost care.

"Do you need anything?", he spoke up after a while. "A glass of water maybe?"

Olivia shook her head, because she didn't think she'd be able to keep it down. Regretfully, she slit off his lap, but remained close to him. She pulled her legs up and under her so her knees were touching Fitz' thigh. If Olivia was going to talk, she needed to separate herself from him without losing contact completely. He hadn't asked her to answer any of the many questions he had, because Fitz felt that it had to be up to her whether or not she was willing to share the details of her ordeal with him. But he hoped Olivia would feel comfortable enough around him to allow him in. Her bottom lip was quivering, and she had taken to picking at her nails so vigorously that the skin around them was beginning to bleed. Fitz reached out and slipped his hands around hers, stopping her from hurting herself but also anchoring her to the present rather than letting her mind get lost in the past.

"I was 19.", Olivia whispered, and Fitz held her hands a little tighter. "I never really went out much, but my roommate at the time was a bit of a party girl. There is this bar, like 15 minutes from campus, where nobody really cares about checking IDs, so I guess that's where everyone always met on Friday nights. I don't know why I let her convince me to go; I didn't even really want to be there."

She stopped and glanced at him from beneath her eyelashes. Fitz was still looking at her; he hadn't run off yet.

"It was loud and smelly and I hated it. So I left before anyone else was ready to go. It was so close to my dorm… I… I would have made it there in no time."

Fitz knew what was coming, and he could see that Olivia was returning to that day and that moment in her mind. Her eyes seemed distant, and he wondered if she was picturing her nightmare. A squeeze of his hand brought her back to him.

"I almost made it.", she breathed. "I could already see the dorms. I didn't even see him coming. He was just… there… suddenly, out of nowhere. And I just… I knew he was going to hurt me."

Her tears were falling faster again now, and Fitz wanted nothing more to take some of her pain away.

"He held a gun to my head and dragged me between the bushes and trees at the campus entrance. He just… ripped my skirt… and it hurt… everything hurt so much and I'd never… I wasn't…"

"I know, I know.", Fitz soothed her, saving her from actually having to say the words. "I understand, sweetheart."

Olivia didn't have to tell him what that bastard had done to her; he knew. He knew that he had taken her innocence away from her in the most gruesome way. His anger was threatening to overwhelm him, and Fitz needed to remind himself that he couldn't express his feelings right now – that he needed to be a strong, calm presence for Olivia.

"When he was done he just… got up and left me there. He told me that he'd come find me if I ever told anyone about this. And I know I should have done the right thing… I know I should have gone to the emergency room or the police or even campus security, but I just went to my dorm and I showered over and over again for hours until my skin was raw from the hot water. And I know that was wrong, I know I only made everything worse… I was such a coward."

"Olivia…", Fitz interrupted her. "Livy…"

Nobody had called her that since she'd been five years old and her daddy's pride and joy, and hearing Fitz say it now made her cry even more. He was such a wonderful man – everything she could have ever dreamt of – but he was unavailable to her, because no one would ever want to look at her, touch her, love her now. The monster that had taken her innocence and her faith in men three years ago was not done torturing her. He'd taken her self-worth; he'd taken her heart and crumbled it.

"You did the right thing.", Fitz said, causing Olivia's head to snap up. "Maybe it wasn't the best choice from a legal or medical perspective, but at the time, it was the best choice for you – and that's all that matters. You did the right thing, Liv."

"I've never told anyone, Fitz.", she whispered. "Nobody knows this ever even happened. I should have brought him to justice. It should have been me."

"We can still do that now, if that's what you want. We'll find him."

"He's dead."

"What?", Fitz stammered, shocked.

"Three months after… after he attacked me, there was a brief mention of a fatal car crash on the local news. They said four young guys got killed when their car flipped over and into a field. They'd all been drunk. His name was Michael – they showed his picture along with the others and I knew. I just knew it was him. I recognized those… those cold eyes that stared at me that night."

"He deserved it.", Fitz mumbled, but Olivia heard him anyway.

"He's dead, Fitz.", Olivia stated brokenly. "He paid the ultimate price. But I still see him behind every corner. He's every shadow, every cruel nightmare. I fight him off over and over again, every day. He's dead, but he's still everywhere."

Carefully, Fitz pulled her back into his arms, no longer willing to be separated from her. Stunned, Olivia watched as he leaned in and placed the most gentle of kisses against her lips.

"You don't have to fight him off alone anymore, Livy. I will be here for you from now on, and we will fight him together."