Jupiter

I had just finished my devotional for the morning and came downstairs. I was filled with joy to find Amber, the girl I was recently able to lead away from the Dark Kingdom and into the Queen's love, down there in one of the study lounges with her mentor, so curiously seeking the Lord and learning all about the mission.

She's 16 – the same age I was when I joined the Moon Kingdom. During the fight on the battlefield, she was relentlessly attacking me with her sword while I was shielding myself with lightning. Eventually her weapon broke, so she was left to throwing punches. I noticed massive bruises all over her arms and back. I released my forcefield, as she was running out of energy.

"What happened to you? Are those bruises from battle?"

"What's it to you?" she kept throwing weak punches, breathing heavily.

"You don't have to keep fighting. I promise I won't hurt you. I just want to know what happened."

"I got punished."

"What for?"

"Our commander wanted each of us to defeat at least 200 people in yesterday's battle. I only got half that far. I failed to do what I was told, and so I got punished. But it's fine. I deserved it."

"You do NOT deserve that. Listen to me," I got down on the ground like she was and looked into her eyes. "You DON'T deserve that. You deserve to be forgiven, respected, and loved."

"Yeah, that would be nice, if only that existed. I don't live in your guys' fantasy wonderland, okay? This is real life."

"If you come with me to the Moon Kingdom, you can experience it and know the Queen and learn all about her love and kindness. You'll be swept away by grace."

"I'm NOT going with you!"

"I won't force you. But if you do choose come with me, you can always leave and come back here if you want to. We value freedom there. You have my word."

I held out my hand to her, for probably about five minutes straight, neither of us saying another word. And at long last, she placed her hand in mine and accepted.

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Footsteps woke me up in the middle of the night.

Whenever I wake up, it's really hard for me fall back asleep unless I get up and walk around for a little bit. I could still hear someone walking faintly, so I followed the noise.

It led me outside into the flower fields. It was dark out but the bright colors of the flowers always seemed to keep the place lit. I saw the person walking far out in the distance, so I ran to catch up.

She turned around, pale in the face.

"Mars? What are you doing out here?"

"Oh? Nothing!" she forced a smile.

"Were you going to Earth?"

"Well, I-"

"And what are you holding behind your back?"

"It's just a letter. For Jadeite. I was just going to deliver it to him."

"At 3 in the morning?"

"Yeah, well. Now or never, right? He'll probably be too busy during the day to meet with me. But don't worry, it's nothing important."

Her overly-perky tone of voice was an obvious indicator that something was going on. I unfolded my arms and held out my held, giving her my serious glare. "Hand it over."

"What?! Jupiter, it's personal!"

"I can recognize your lying face. Give me the letter. If it's nothing important, like you said, then it shouldn't be a big deal."

"What if I don't?"

"That's your prerogative. But I can tell you're not okay, and as your sister, I want to know why and how I can help."

She sighed softly, tears starting to form. "Okay. Here…"

Dear Jadeite,

I just wanted to let you know that after tomorrow, you might not find me on the moon or at our base on Earth. If you don't, then don't bother looking for me. I'll be with the Dark Kingdom.

This is not in any way because of anything you've done. I want you to know that I loved it when you prayed for my healing, and I'll never forget that. But living out this mission is just too hard. It's too much. I'm not the kindest person and never will be, and I feel unworthy of being part of the Moon Kingdom. I think I'll fit in better on the other side. Please don't try to come after me.

I never thought I'd say this to a man, but I do love you. I always will. And I'll never forget.

-Mars

My hands were shaking as I came to the end of the letter. I couldn't believe it. Mars, my dear sister and ally, wanted to leave us.

"Mars… where is this coming from?"

"I just think it'll be easier on me and everyone else if I left."

"Don't you remember Christopher's story? And mine? They'll destroy you over there!"

"But I won't be a burden on the people here."

"A burden?! You are not, and have NEVER been a burden. What makes you say that?"

"I… I don't know. I just feel it, you know?"

I walked closer to her and put both hands on her shoulders. "Look. I know that we've had to spend a lot of time on Earth, and it's really easy to let the enemies and the demons influence us. They whisper lies into our ears all the time and we usually don't even notice, and a lot of times we think that those lies are our own thoughts. But that's why it's important to put on the Spirit's armor daily. Tell me, when was the last time you went and spent time with the Queen?"

"…Five months or so?"

"Hun, that's not good. That's why you're drifting away from everything. Do you remember when she told us that we can ALWAYS go spend time with her? She meant it."

"I know. But often times I feel unworthy, and other times, she just… feels so distant."

"When she feels distant, that doesn't mean that she moved away. It means that we did."

She moved away from my arms and turned around to gaze at the Earth for a moment before turning back to face me again.

"…Can you just tell me one thing?"

"Anything."

"What exactly led to your official decision to leave the Dark Kingdom and come here, after your encounter with Queen Serenity? I mean, I know it wasn't immediate for you. So what made you finally decide to leave them?"

"The day after my capture and release from Queen Serenity, I went to our morning meeting where Beryl was speaking as usual. She was a beautiful woman who always seemed to encourage us in our mission with eloquence and passion, but on this particular day, I began to see holes in her speech. Evil fell from her pretty mouth, wrapped in her classic voice. She was angelic in her syntax, but demonic in her motive. In the middle of her speech, she nodded to a man in the back and I turned to see him lean down and walk quickly from the room. Just then, an explosion went off and 50 people were killed instantly. Beryl yelled, 'Did you hear that?! Go help your brothers! The Moon Kingdom is full of murderers! We must defeat them and avenge our brothers!' As everyone turned to assist the wounded, I looked back at her, and saw her begin to smile. As she scanned the room with pleasure, her eyes fell on me and her smile vanished. Her face filled with hatred and my heart raged against her. I made my way to the stage and began to yell so the soldiers could hear what Beryl had done. Everyone was silent as we argued and I picked apart her lies. I told them about my meeting with Queen Serenity and how much love she'd shown me. Hundreds of them began to cry. Beryl ordered me to be executed on the spot, but the guards were all weeping. I asked if anyone wanted to join the Moon Kingdom with me and thousands of open hands went up. She was outnumbered and slipped away before we could seize her. From there she moved to other parts of the world to recruit new people, but I had already left by then."

Tears were falling down Mars' face as she ran up to embrace me (which was something she rarely did).

"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" she sobbed.

I hugged her tight. "It's okay. We love you. No matter what."