Part Two
Lily was growing more and more serious about her schoolwork. Exams were coming up alarmingly fast, and her obsession with being top of her year was getting ridiculous. She checked out dozens of books, making out review sheets for each, which she pleaded with her friends to quiz her on at every available moment.
The "ridiculous" aspect was quickly becoming "dangerous". Lily read well into the early hours, and every lunch hour was spent in the library. At first they weren't too worried, she made up the lost meal with dinner and breakfast, but then those meals only became a bite or two.
She was losing weight - a lot of it. Lily had always been underweight, and this loss was not good. Each of her friends tried to talk to her, but she brushed them off, promising to do whatever they wanted after exams. Not even Rose could get through to her.
Teachers were beginning to notice the changes too. One day Professor McGonagall told her to stay after class.
"Miss Evans, are you sure you're feeling well? Are you getting enough sleep?" she inquired anxiously.
Lily nodded absentmindedly, distractedly thinking of James's ungodly amount of talent in this class. "Professor, is there any extra credit I can do?"
McGonagall stared. "Miss Evans, I really think you are working too hard. Why don't you take a day off to relax?"
"I don't think I can do that, Professor."
Exams were two weeks away. Lily had sunk into a state where she snapped at anyone who spoke to her except for her sisters and teachers, and every waking moment was spent with either a book or review sheet.
One night she and the boys were in the library. Lily was frantically searching for a Herbology book, and James, David, Sirius, Remus, and Peter were doing Animagi work.
Lily was strained, to say the least. She was feeling a bit dizzy, and it took he eyes a few seconds to focus on the titles on the books. But where was it? She had actually seen it here a few days ago, she was sure it had the information she needed.
"Where is it?" she muttered out loud, running her fingers over the spines. "Oh, come on, it has to be here!"
Snape was in the aisle next to her, and he heard her wails. He moved to her aisle, trying to discern her trouble.
"Are you all right?" he asked, staring. She was incredibly thin, and her eyes had a glossy look to them. She was wearing a shirt that two months ago had been a little tight on her. Now it hung in loose folds.
"Yes, yes, I'm fine," she replied, barely noticing and not caring who she was talking to.
"You don't look fine," he objected, still staring.
"That doesn't really matter right now! I've got to find this book!"
"Actually, it could matter a lot. When was the last time you ate?"
Lily stopped, distracted. "Er...yesterday morning. Half a muffin."
"What?"
She held up her hands. "I'm going to eat again after exams, okay? But-" she broke off. The bookcase in front of her suddenly started to swing back and forth, along with everything else. Panicking, she clutched at Snape's arm.
"What's wrong?" he questioned, now really concerned.
Meanwhile Sirius and James had heard the voices and were slowly approaching. As Lily and Snape came into sight, they saw Snape grab Lily's arm just as she crumpled to the ground.
"What did you do to her?" shouted Sirius, dashing forward.
Snape, who had fallen by the unconscious girl's side, looked up in anger. "What did I do? You're the ones who let her starve herself!"
Remus, David, and Peter had run up to see what all the shouting was about, and upon seeing the sight Peter gasped, Remus immediately dropped to his knees to check her pulse, and David demanded,
"What happened?"
"I don't know! I was just talking to her and she collapsed!" Snape snapped. Sirius began to shake her.
"Lil! Come on, wake up! Lil! Lily!"
But Lily did not show any signs of life: not a flutter of the eyelashes or a twitch.
"How's her pulse?" Snape asked, glancing at Remus.
"Weak. But the good thing is that she has one."
"We need to take her to the hospital wing," Sirius said with sudden decision.
"I've got it." And before anyone could stop him, Snape scooped Lily up in his arms, one arm behind her back and one under her knees.
"What? How about letting her friends take her?" James argued.
"Potter, if you want to help so badly, you can carry her bag." Snape shifted her so he could carry her better and started for the doors of the library. Helpless, James grabbed Lily's bag and started after him, calling back to his friends,
"Go to the common room and tell Rose and Mary what happened."
The two boys walked in silence for a few minutes. Snape couldn't believe how light Lily was. He'd had homework heavier than this. He glared at Potter. How could he let her do this to herself? She was so fragile.
James broke the silence. "If she's getting too heavy-"
"She's not," Snape cut him off. They continued without saying anything. Potter, to his credit, pulled back the tapestries for Snape and Lily to pass.
They were about halfway there when he began to feel her weight. Anorexic or not, she was fifteen, not five. But he didn't dare let it show. He wasn't about to hand her over to Potter. Snape shifted her again, but to his surprise, she stirred. He stopped and Potter glanced at him.
"What?"
Lily felt like she was coming out of a very thick fog. Her senses were very slowly returning to her. She realized she was being carried damsel-in-distress fashion. Wondering who on earth could be carrying her, she opened her eyes and focused on the face above her.
It was Snape. Lily couldn't help it. With a shriek, she tried to roll out of his arms. Snape quickly let go of her - feet first. Breathing hard, she backed against the wall.
"Lily!" James exclaimed, moving towards her.
"What happened?" she asked weakly, undergoing a series of hot flashes. She bent over, placing her hands on her knees.
"I - I remember talking to you-" She glanced at Snape.
"You fainted," he said matter-of-factly. "I was carrying you to the hospital wing."
"Oh," Lily whispered, starting to feel dizzy again. She closed her eyes until it passed. "Well - I'm okay now. James, can I have my bag back?"
They gaped at her, sharing the same incredulous expression.
"What?" Lily asked, a bit nervously. "You are James, right?" She studied him. She hadn't mistaken one twin for the other in years, but she wasn't exactly feeling like herself.
"Yeah, but - Lily, you just fainted! Sirius was shaking you, and you didn't even blink."
"You can't blink when you're unconscious," Snape pointed out.
"Not now," James snapped, and then he turned back to her. "Lily, you collapsed. You need to go to the hospital wing. Look at yourself!"
Lily hesitated, and then gave in. She felt too tired to argue. "Okay. I'll go. But I can walk."
The boys watched skeptically as she straightened and slowly took a few steps forward. Snape was ready when her legs buckled and she fell.
They didn't say another word until they met Madam Pomfrey at the hospital.
"What happened?" she gasped as Snape dumped the once-more unconscious Lily onto a bed.
"Malnutrition," he said before Potter could answer. "And loss of sleep." As Madam Pomfrey tutted, Lily's eyes flickered open.
"What - oh." She tried to sit up, but the nurse pushed her back down. Lily relented and turned to James wearily.
"James, can you please tell my sisters that Madam Pomfrey is holding me hostage until I gain about twenty pounds? And don't-" The zealous nurse put a hand over Lily's mouth.
"No more words. Out," she added to James and Snape.
"When can we see her?" James challenged.
"Wait at least twenty-four hours, and then I'll consider it. Now go."
As soon as James and Snape stepped out of the hospital they headed in opposite directions. James had just turned a corner when Rose and Mary crashed into him.
"Where is she? Where is Snape?" were the first words out of Mary's mouth.
"Nice to know you've got your priorities straight," James retorted as he got to his feet.
Mary took no notice of the comment. Her eyes were flashing, and she looked more dangerous than ever. "Peter said Snape was carrying her. Where is my sister?"
James winced. Peter had to say that, didn't he? "It's all right. Calm down. We dropped her off at the hospital wing. She said to tell you that the nurse is keeping her until she gains some weight. But Madam Pomfrey says no visitors for at least twenty-four hours."
Rose moaned, leaning against the wall. "Oh my God, Anetka and Nicki are going to kill me. How could I have let this happen?"
"It's not your fault," James tried to comfort her, surprised at how close to tears she was. "We all tried to talk to her, remember? She wouldn't listen. Now she's going to be fine, you know how strict Madam Pomfrey is. Lily will be perfect health by the time she's released whether she likes it or not."
Rose was still moaning. "It doesn't matter! My parents are going to say that I should've helped her!"
"No, they're not," said James firmly. "I know them better than that. They're not going to blame you for something Lily did. You know that."
Rose continued to look miserable. "I can't believe this. How could it have happened?" she repeated.
"She's going to be fine," James said quietly. "Trust me on this, okay?"
She just shook her head, but allowed James to lead her and Mary back to the common room.
The next day Rose tearfully sent an owl informing Anetka and Nicki of the incident. The boys tried to break into the hospital wing during lunch hour, but Madam Pomfrey locked then out.
That night during supper, Snape arose and left the Great Hall. No one noticed.
At the hospital wing he paused, then knocked calmly on the door. Madam Pomfrey opened the door about a centimeter, just enough to peer suspiciously at him.
"Yes?"
"I was wondering if I could visit someone," Snape said offhandedly.
"Miss Evans, I suppose?" the nurse sighed.
Snape nodded, fully expecting to be told to come back later. To his shock, she opened the door wider and moved aside, allowing him to enter.
"If she's asleep, don't wake her," Madam Pomfrey instructed. "You have ten minutes." She left for her office.
Snape was stunned for a second, and then quickly moved forward to her bed.
Lily was asleep. Her red hair was strewn all over the pillow, and she looked more at peace than she had at weeks. Snape had no desire to wake her. He cautiously sat down at the foot of her bed, watching her sleep and planning what he would say if she awoke - in every possible scenario. A few minutes passed, and he shifted his weight slightly. Lily's eyes fluttered open. Snape quickly looked up, waiting for her reaction.
Something akin to fear flickered across her face, followed by uncertainty. She pushed herself up, running a hand over her hair in an attempt to make it not too frightful.
Snape stood up before she could say anything and began his mentally rehearsed speech.
"I was curious about how you were after last night, and I decided to drop by to see how you were recuperating. We were never properly introduced, were we? I'm Severus Snape. You can call me Severus."
There was something about Lily. She would always give someone a second chance for anything as long as that person proved they were sincere and willing to try again. Unless they'd done something terrible, she would always let them try again. So when Snape was finished she took a moment to recover, then gave a tentative smile and held out her hand.
"I'm Lily Evans. You can call me Lily." They shook hands.
Severus sat back down on the bed, extremely pleased with himself. Step one completed. "So, how are you feeling?"
She smiled again. "Better, actually. Madam Pomfrey is making me eat a pound of chocolate every hour, and I'm getting a lot of rest. I didn't realize how tired I really was."
"You obviously didn't realize how necessary the intake of food was either," Severus pointed out. She laughed.
"That wasn't on purpose, really," she responded. "I just forgot."
"You forgot to eat?" repeated Severus, raising his eyebrows. "You're a danger to yourself when it comes to books, you know that?" She smiled in answer. "What are your parents going to think?"
Lily winced. "I don't want to even think about it. They'll go ballistic. But it's my sisters I'm really worried about. They will be heartbroken. I probably won't be able to get out of their sight for a month. Them and the boys."
Snape's small smile disappeared. "You mean the people who let you starve yourself in the first place?"
At once he wished he hadn't said that. Now she would be mad at him. But she didn't look offended. "They tried to help, but I wouldn't listen. It isn't their fault."
"They still should have done something," Severus muttered.
"They tried," repeated Lily. Severus quickly changed the subject.
"Have they visited you yet?"
"I think they tried during lunch...."
They continued to talk about little nothings for several minutes, and then they broke off. Footsteps, voices, and laughter were sounding down the hall, coming nearer and nearer. Severus's lips tightened, but he did not move from where he sat.
Lily glanced at him nervously. "I think that's my friends coming..."
"So do I," Severus said icily.
There was a pause, and then the door burst open, and Rose, Mary, Alice, Nicole, James, David, Sirius, Remus, and Peter flooded the room. The eager looks on their faces transformed into shocked ones as they saw the visitor sitting on Lily's bed.
"You?" said James, taken aback. "What are you doing here?"
"What does it look like?" Severus retorted, standing up. "But I'm not going to stay here with you-" -he barely stopped himself from making an assessment that would have lost him every ounce of progress made with Lily- "people." He turned back to Lily. "Goodnight, Lily. See you tomorrow." He glided past all of them and disappeared down the corridor.
It was all confusion after that. James and Sirius checked her chocolate for poison or hexes, while David, Remus, and Peter asked her if she was really all right. Alice and Nicole wondered about why and what he was doing there. Rose and Mary, however, held the closest examination of their older sister.
Then Madam Pomfrey stomped out of her office, calling them all a herd of elephants and demanding some peace and order in a hospital. They quickly quieted down, and began to calmly ask Lily how she was.
She visibly cringed when Rose told her of her letter to their parents. She knew they would not take the news calmly. And she felt guilty about Rose and Mary's reactions. Rose and she were far too close to be uncomfortable, but the certain sadness and quiet way of talking she used made Lily feel like something terrible had happened. Mary was different. She sat on the edge of the bed, not saying much and glancing up at her every now and then, just to quickly look back down at her lap. This unnerved Lily. She was thankful for all of their company, but in a way relieved when they left.
The next day Severus called in again. During the entire visit Lily was edgy, nervous like she was trying to walk on a balance beam and every word and action she did was extremely important. But he kept it casual. When he did leave, she sank back into her pillows, feeling like she had run a very long race.
As the days passed (Madam Pomfrey insisted on keeping her; she was determined to eliminate every possibility of a relapse), he started visiting more and more often. Lily lost her nervousness around him, and instead surprised herself by beginning to look forward to his coming around. He was a rather interesting person to talk to, never making her feel uncomfortable.
She decided not to tell the boys he was coming by, they would probably attack him upon sight. But she did tell Rose and Mary. Mary was very worried.
"Do you mind?" Rose asked. Lily considered this.
"No - I guess not."
"Then it's not a problem," Rose concluded.
"I don't know," Mary blurted out. "He's still a Slytherin..."
"Which is why you have to be at least a little bit careful," added Rose.
"Oh, I am..."
After a week Madam Pomfrey finally discharged her from the hospital - just in time for the exams. Lily faced them with a sort of calm nervousness. She did each one and didn't talk about it afterwards. Her friends did well too, except Peter, who swore again and again he failed Transfiguration, that McGonagall hated him. It had to be admitted that she had started becoming vicious toward him.
The results arrived - Peter had indeed failed Transfiguration, and McGonagall had unsympathetically given him several extra workbooks to be completed during the vacation. Peter pleaded with James, David, and Sirius for help, and they were just about to concede when Lily and Rose rose up and gave a resounding objection. How was he ever going to learn? He would someday graduate from Hogwarts, then what would happen? The boys succumbed and Peter was left alone with his certain doom.
When Lily, Rose, and Mary descended the steps of the Hogwarts Express on June 1st, the oldest of them was immediately pulled aside by her parents.
"Oh my God, Lily," whispered Anetka, holding the fifteen-year-old's face between her hands before tightly hugging her.
"Anetka!" Lily exclaimed, trying to pull herself free in some embarrassment. "I'm alright, really-" It was true that she had definitely improved since she had first been checked into the hospital, but she was still not the same girl who had gone through the barrier on September 1st not a year ago. She was still unnaturally thin, and she couldn't walk far without stopping.
"How could you do this to us?" her mother burst out, taking her by her shoulders. "When we got Rose's letter, we nearly died, we never expected this from you, I always thought you were brighter than that!"
Lily glanced nervously at her surprised sisters. "What exactly did you say in that letter, Rose?"
"This is serious, Lily," her father cut in.
"I know, I know!" she cried, raising her hands in an effort to calm them. "I didn't starve myself on purpose, it was an accident. And now I know better, and it won't happen again. I promise."
"It better not," Anetka muttered, hugging her again before finally turning to her younger daughters.
That summer, for the first time in their lives, Anetka and Nicki were overprotective of Lily. Nicki offered to drive her every time she wanted to go somewhere, even if it was only a block away, and at every meal they made sure she ate every scrap of food on her plate. By the end of June, Lily felt like she was suffocating.
Her teenage hormones were finally kicking in, and she was very aware of the changes. She hated the increasingly murderous attitude she was feeling toward her older sister, and she was fighting it as much as she could. So when Lily was tempted to run both her and her maddening boyfriend through the Muggle waste disposal a couple of times, she just ran outside and up into the thickest part of the tree with a book or two, where she read until she forgot why she had come up in the first place.
