Disclaimer: This is an original story based upon the characters of Gilmore Girls. No profit will be made from this story and no copyright infringement is intended.

Author's note: Okay gals and guys, I am so sorry that the updates keep coming so few and far between. Another thing I must apologize for, to my readers and especially to Lorelai. It was pointed out to me that Lorelai did tell Emily about Luke before the car accident when she came over to her house. I wish I could say that Emily was on Nyquil or something and that's why she forgot, but unfortunately I have no excuse except for hurried sloppy writing. It won't happen again...I hope.

When her daughter left her she would dream of Lorelai as a little baby. She would dream of rocking her, of holding her close and kissing her soft hair. The dreams were so real she could literally smell the scent of Johnson and Johnson's baby lotion and hear her baby's laughter. When she would wake up and realize again that she was a mother without a child she would quietly get out of bed and go into her closet where Richard couldn't hear her. She would sit down, draw her knees into her chest and sob out her broken heart. Emily closed her eyes against the unwelcome memory as she pulled a pant suit out for the day. She was in a hurry, she had to stop by the grocery store and get groceries for Lorelai before getting to Lorelai's at 10:00. She didn't have enough time to feel sorry for herself, didn't have time to dwell on the past...but she found herself slipping quietly into Lorelai's room. She came and sat down on the bed, smoothing her hand over the bed spread. It was so dusty in here, and it looked as though it hadn't been vacuumed in a month. She was going to speak to what was her name...that's right, Rosanna.

She looked around the room, shaking her head at the boy band posters. Why hadn't she taken them down when Lorelai left? As soon as she thought the question she knew the answer. As silly as it was, there was a small part of her that thought that as long as those posters were up there was a chance that her daughter would come walking in her room throwing her book bag on the floor and tell her that she was going to give the valedictorian speech at her graduation. She would tell her that it was all a dream, she wasn't pregnant, she wasn't going to leave. Emily was surprised to feel tears stinging in her eyes. This was ridiculous, she thought to herself. For Heaven's sake, Rory was almost twenty-three years old. She looked up at the poster of the five men with pierced tongues and tattoos. Oh they had fought a battle about that one. The idea that something so revolting was up in her house disgusted her. Yet...so many years later it was still there. She would never tell Lorelai this, but after her daughter left her she would have welcomed a hundred posters like that. She would have welcomed the insolence, the arguments, the rolling of the eyes. Having a daughter that fought with you...even hated you was a hundred times better than having no daughter at all.

The telephone was ringing, thank goodness. She cursed herself for feeling sorry for herself and went to her room to get the phone. She cursed for a different reason when she saw the caller ID...Rory.

Lorelai, how much longer are you going to make me do this?

"Hello?" she answered and noticed right away the troubled tone in Rory's voice.

"Hi Grandma," her granddaughter replied.

"Hi sweetie, how are you? How's conquering the world?" she tried to sound chipper.

"Grandma, I need to talk you about Mom. I'm worried about her, she's been home sick for a week, and she's never been sick for a week, even when she broke her leg she went to work in a wheel chair and then hobbled around on crutches. Is she okay?"

"Sweetie, she's just fine, she just has a terrible bug that's all," as soon as she said the words her face began to turn red. She hated that...it always turned red when she lied.

There was a long pause, "Grandma...is your face turning red?"

"Rory, what kind of ridiculous question is that?" she asked, running her free hand through her hair. She suddenly remembered her daughter had picked up the same characteristic. She should know, Lorelai spent most of her teenage years looking like a beet.

"Sweetie, I have to go," she said quickly, "Don't you worry about a thing, just concentrate on your work."

"Do you promise there's nothing wrong?" Rory asked, sounding like a little child needing reassurance.

Lorelai, for Heaven's sake...

She couldn't lie to her, she just couldn't, but if Lorelai found out it was Emily that spilled the beans, then the closer relationship she had felt with her daughter since the accident might be over. She knew it couldn't last forever, but she wanted to hold on to it as long as she could. After all...it wasn't really a lie, the danger was over, Lorelai was going to be fine.

"I promise," she said quickly. "Everything is just fine. And don't worry about the DAR event. I understand that you can't make it."

"Alright Grandma," Rory said, seeming a little more at ease. "I have to go. I love you." Hearing those unexpected three words made Emily's heart swell. "I love you too Sweetie," and then hung up the phone. She and her daughter were going to have a serious talk about this today. It simply wasn't right to keep this from Rory.

An hour later she was unpacking the groceries she had bought into her daughter's refrigerator.

"You got the cauliflower didn't you?" Lorelai's voice resounded from the living room.

"What are you talking about?" Emily called back, pulling the big white vegtable from the sack. "I didn't get the cauliflower."

"Yes you did," Lorelai shot back, "You got the cauliflower and the broccoli and the beets, didn't you?"

"Just watch Oprah and be quiet,"

"Mom, I'm not going to eat that stuff!"

"Lorelai, I didn't buy it!" she sad, wondering if Sookie knew of some recipe that would successfully hide the three detested vegtables.

"Mom, I smell cauliflower,"

"Lorelai, I wonder...could you have been dropped on the head as a child? I know it wasn't me, maybe your father or a maid?"

"Very funny Mother, but I am not touching those vegtables unless they are drowning in a cheese sauce."

Her mother shook her head and picked up the two mugs--a coffee for her, and herbal tea for Lorelai.

"Here we go," she said bringing them into the living room. She handed the tea to Lorelai who looked up at her in disdain.

"Drink," came the orders. "It's supposed to strengthen your immune system."

Lorelai took it from her and slowly drank, making the same face she did when she was a child and Emily would give her cough medicine. Emily smiled slightly as she watched her daughter's face wrinkle in disgust.

"Lorelai," Emily said as she sat down next to her, "We need to talk about Rory. She called today and she knows something is wrong."

"What did you tell her?" Lorelai asked.

"I told her that everything was fine, but she's not a child Lorelai. She's not going to be satisfied with that. It was wrong of you to keep it from her and I think in the end it's going to do more harm than good."

"I just want to protect her. I know her Mom, if she knows how serious the accident was, she'll get scared and never want to leave again. This is her time." Lorelai said quietly, "I'm not going to take that away from her."

"And lying to her is a better alternative? Honestly Lorelai, are you going to keep it from her forever?"

"The next time she's home should be Thanksgiving, I should be better by then."

Emily shook her head and murmured in disapproval. "You know if you didn't create such a codependant relationship with your daughter, this wouldn't even be an issue."

Lorelai looked at her watch, "Hmm, 2 minutes and 30 seconds, not at all your best time Mom."

"What are you babbling about?"

"How long it took for you to blame me, not bad...still, I've seen you do it much faster."

"Lorelai, I'm serious," Emily said in frustration.

"So am I," Lorelai said in a firm voice. "This is my kid. This is what I want to do."

Emily turned back to face her, feeling something like acid bubbling up in her at her daughter's hypocritical statement. She started to open her mouth and then swallowed it. Things were so perfect between them...couldn't they stay that way? Just a little longer? "Fine," she said in a voice that she made sure would still communicate her disapproval. "I won't say anything."

They watched television for awhile in silence, and then Emily read while Lorelai dozed. When Lorelai woke up, it was almost four.

"Did you have a good nap?" Emily asked.

Lorelai nodded, "It was great," she said smiling. "Thanks."

"Well, Luke will be here soon so I better get going," Emily said picking up her purse and magazine. "I won't be here until 11 tomorrow, I have a DAR meeting in the morning. Will you be able to manage without me?"

"Yeah sure Mom, I'll be fine," Lorelai said nonchalantly as she turned on the television.

"Well, goodbye Lorelai," Emily said starting towards the door.

"Bye Mom," Lorelai waved, engrossed in some soap opera drama.

Emily shook her head. She was almost to the door when she heard the television turn off and heard Lorelai call her. "Yes?" she said turning around.

Lorelai smiled sheepishly at her. "Hey, I was wondering, Luke said he's bringing over Chinese tonight and we're going to have a stay-in date and I was just wondering, would you mind helping me get ready? Help me with my hair and make-up?"

Emily felt a surge of delight flow through her like electricity. "Um...sure," she said smiling, "Anything I can do to help," hoping that she didn't sound too excited. She wasn't fooling anybody. Lorelai smiled at the look on her mother's face. "My make-up bag is there on the desk and would you mind going up to my closet and getting my orange shirt on the top of the shelf?"

"Certainly," Emily said, "Although orange has never been your best..."

"Mother," Lorelai said, meaning business, "Get the shirt."

"Alright, alright," she said, "I'm going."

Once upstairs her face burst into a huge smile. There was a time she admitted that the thought of doing anything to encourage her daughter towards Luke was insanity. But that was in her mind the closer Lorelai got to Luke, the farther away she would be from her. Christopher was insurance, insurance that she would still have contact with her daughter. But, here she was helping her daughter get ready for date with Luke! How things changed. She had often wondered what it would be like to be Lorelai and Rory. She disapproved of some aspects of their relationship. She had never believed that a mother should be best friends with her daughter, a daughter needed her mother to be a mother and sometimes that definitely meant not being a friend. Secretly, what she wanted more than anything else was just to be part of the fun, to be included in their world. Her daughter had just made a gesture for her to come into that world, and it delighted her. She opened the door and shook her head at her daughter's room--some things never change.

"Did you find it?" Lorelai called.

"How do you expect me to find anything in the wild jungles of Africa?" she called back.

"Honestly Mother, you seriously need to get some new lecture material," Lorelai's voice came back.

Finally Emily saw a splash of orange on the top of the closet, she reached up and pulled the shirt off the top. It came down along with a shoebox of pictures. Emily snorted in disgust as she began to pick up the pictures. She looked at them as she put them back in the box and smiled as she saw pictures of baby Rory--such big blue eyes, such adorable little cheeks. She picked up a picture she hadn't seen before. It was of Lorelai and she was hugging someone. Her chest tightened as she realized that it was Mia. It was in the town square of Stars Hollow and it was obviously some kind of occasion. She turned it over and her chest tightened even more as she read the words, "Lorelai and Mia, Mother and Daughter Picnic, Stars Hollow, 1990."

"Mom, I'm turning into an old woman down here!" Lorelai called.

Emily sighed, putting the picture back in the box and started downstairs. "I'm coming," she said.

After Lorelai had changed shirts, she tried to brush her hair but it hurt her chest to raise her arms that high.

"Let me," Emily said gently, and started brushing. She got lost in those dark waves, just like she did when Lorelai was a little girl. Ever since the moment she had found out she was pregnant she had wanted a girl, for nine months she had craved pink. She hardly ever brushed her daughter's hair after three, from that time on Lorelai had to do everything on her own. She loved those rare occasions brushing the strands till they looked like silk and then she would stand back and look at her beautiful girl...her beautiful girl.

"Earth to Mom, come in Mom, I hate to interrupt this trip into to space off land, but I have really got to pee," Lorelai's voice brought her out of her thoughts.

"Sorry," Emily said, still in a daze, and bent down to offer Lorelai her shoulder.

Lorelai winced in pain as she stood and Emily put a strong arm around her. "Just lean on me," she whispered tenderly. Taking Lorelai to the bathroom was an ordeal, it took them ten minutes just to get there. "What are you going to watch tonight?" Emily asked as they made their way through the living room.

"I'm not sure, going with the Chinese food theme, we're debating between Mulan, Memoirs of a Geisha and..." Suddenly, Lorelai cried out in pain and doubled over.

"Lorelai, what is it?" Emily cried, her heart racing. "Is it your leg?"

"No...my...side...Oh, Mom..." she cried out again.

"I'm calling 911" Emily said, starting towards the phone.

"No...no Mom wait, don't leave me," she said, and grabbed her mother's hand. Emily held on to her, though her own heart was beating so fast she thought she would faint.

"I'm...I'm okay," Lorelai said, "It's passed." she straightened up.

"We're going to the hospital," Emily said, turning her towards the door.

"No, Mom, please...I probably just ate something that disagreed with me, or maybe I just got up too fast. Please, I don't want to go back there."

"Lorelai, we are going to the hospital,"

"Mom, no, you are not calling the shots here. Now take me to the bathroom." Emily started to say something again and then helped her to the bathroom, not wanting to make Lorelai angry. She was determined not to do anything to push Lorelai away.

"That happens again and we're going to the hospital," she said as she helped Lorelai in.

"Yeah Mom, I promise," Lorelai nodded.

Emily sighed. Maybe that's all it really was...too much excitement.