Time: 0015\

June 30, 2525\

Reach

It's kinda funny, when I think back on everything. I was in that hot water from the moment of my birth, and I never noticed until someone pulled me out.

Well, maybe I should back up a bit. In training, Deja had told us about 'Frog Soup'. Contrary to the name, it's not a recipe for anything edible, so far as I'm aware. It was an example of how people don't notice danger that grows around them slowly. According to Deja, if you put a frog in room temperature water and slowly heat it, the amphibian will just sit there and eventually boil to death. This is opposed to if you put a frog in hot water, where it automatically jumps out because it can tell it's in danger. Human minds are the same, that's why the military is constantly shifting soldiers around. If there's danger, a new soldier will notice before an older one, because the danger grew with the older soldier.

In my case, the danger is ONI. My grandmother is an ONI officer, so I was around agents since before I could walk. They were just a fact of life for me. Then the Spartans happen, and suddenly ONI isn't the people that come visit with my grandmother and play ball with me. They're faceless monsters that always demand more and are never satisfied. Makes sense, in a warped way, that it was also an ONI that ordered my death.

My mother told Lillian and me about these storms on ancient Earth called hurricanes. They were massive storm systems over oceans that could kill thousands of people. A hurricane was all wind and water, but lethal amounts of both. She also said that people always knew when a hurricane was coming, because they didn't come quietly.

Despite that, I usually imagine that ONI is the human version of a hurricane, though they are infinitely quieter than a real storm. They are, however, big and powerful and no one can stop them, which isn't always a good thought when you're being hunted by them. And yes, I am fully aware that it is a stupid comparison to make, but give me a break, I actually managed to crack my skull yesterday because I overestimated how durable the scientists had made me. They should have warned us that our reinforced skeletons are still not bulletproof. Bullet resistance, yes, but proof, no.

My point, and yes, I have a point, is that ONI is like a horrible storm that can destroy everything, but just like ancient humans learned how to survive hurricanes, we have learned to survive ONI. Even though they are so powerful and so dangerous, they are also a part of daily life, whether we think they are or not. Sure, not everyone grew up playing ball with agents that were visiting the house, but decisions made by ONI affect everyone. The war may not have been started by ONI, but anyone that tells me they weren't involved is lying.

But more than that, ONI gets into the minds of everyone in the UNSC. Spartan training was hard, yes, and it killed any chance of us being children, but it was ONI that killed our humanity. One day an agent came to check on our progress, and he was not impressed. He'd pulled Lisa, one of the youngest, to the side and gave her a gun before pointing at one of the nearby adult soldiers and ordering her to kill him. She refused, but what did he honestly expect?! She was nine! Still, he gave the order again, and she refused a second time. That's when he slapped her.

Truth be told, I'm not sure how I got from the side of the training field to them, and I don't care. All I was concerned with was his blood on my knuckles and him getting back to his feet with a split lip. Mendez was going to blow a gasket, we could all tell, but the agent waved him off, nodding to me instead. "Very good," he'd said. "Now we know how to get you to attack. So tell me, what would it take to make you kill? To save a life? To prove you're right? Would those make you kill?" I didn't answer him then, and I'm afraid to answer him now. Still, the question won't leave. What would it take to make me kill? I've done it before to protect, but is that the only time I'll kill, or will I learn to do it on orders? Will I become so cold and so detached that I will someday be able to look into a child's eyes and ask them what it would take to get them to kill? Will the hurricane destroy me like it has so many others?

Actually, thinking back on everything, it's not very funny at all, is it?


Babble time: The song this chapter is based on is Hurricane by 30 Seconds to Mars.