Of Mistletoe and Holly Leaves
Nine: Asking Blessing
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
Each dedicated to a person on FFNet:
Dedicated to maraudersgal333 who I hope is reading this.
Beta read by CloSalvatore
This one kind of follows chapter 7.
-l-James-l-
I had her parents permission without even opening my mouth. But I needed one other person to say yes.
Her best friend, and it wasn't Marlene or Alice.
I stepped out of my flat, leaving with Lily and the others and tea ensured me at least an hour or more.
I pulled my cloak tighter and walked to the end of the street.
" Hello Mr. Potter," I turned to see my Headmaster, or old one at that. " Where are you headed?"
" I need to speak to ahem," I gave him a look. No shock appeared on his face, and his crystal blue eyes surveyed me for a long moment.
" I see." He looked around, as though trying to judge where the other person was.
" Take my arm," he said finally, and I did as he said, turning with him.
The instant my feet touched the ground, he was gone, leaving me on the curb.
I stood alone on an empty street. Looking around, I walked toward a sign, hoping for some direction.
" Spinner's End," I murmured under my breath. Well it looked to be the right spot.
" Hmm..." I looked along the houses, and made my way up and down the street, trying to decipher which one it was.
I finally reached the end and tilted my head when I spotted one that looked rather run down. Deciding it was a better place to start than anywhere, I walked up the path and knocked on the wooden door, noting that it had a snake door-knocker.
After a moment, someone answered it, and opened the door.
I blinked, shocked. Severus Snape stood there.
He looked just as stunned. " Potter?"
I nodded.
" Did something happen?" he asked.
" No. I came to ask your permission."
" Dumbledore's orders?" he asked, opening the door and reluctantly allowing me inside. The Order.
" No. I came by choice, though Dumbledore brought me." I studied him carefully.
He looked confused. " Since when have you needed my permission to do anything?" he asked. He sat down, and I cautiously sat down across from him.
" Since Lily was your best friend," I answered.
" Alright. What do you want?" he looked like he was going to cross his arms, but chose not to.
" I wanted your permission to marry her."
I felt guilty as soon as those words escaped my mouth.
Severus sat completely still as though the words hadn't reached him yet. I didn't speak, I hardly dared to even breathe for fear of him killing me on the spot.
His black eyes stared straight ahead, not moving. " Do you love her?"
" Love her?" I asked, " Of course I-"
" Answer the question," he voice was flat and emotionless.
" Yes."
" And you will protect her?"
" Yes. With my life."
He studied me closely for a moment before replying. " I will allow you to marry her, on one condition."
I hesitated, apprehensive. " What is it?"
" If you hurt her, I will kill you James Potter," he said, standing up. His black eyes pierced mine with promise.
" I will never hurt her."
" You better not. I would rather not kill her true love."
For an instant, his words had to process and when they did, I looked at him in shock.
" You love her." My own words startled me.
He gave me an interesting look. " Yes."
" Do you still love her?"
He nodded. " I'll always love her."
Curious, I pressed on. " Why let her go?"
" Because you deserve her. I could never give her what you could. I was always just her best friend."
" What couldn't you give her? Love?" I asked.
He shook his head. Then slowly pulled up his left sleeve, and on his pale skin was branded a snake and skull. I blinked.
" Protection. Now you know what I am. I'm his Death Eater. I guess I always have known that you would get her. I would only bring her danger. The Dark Lord, if he knew that I married a muggleborn he would have..." he trailed off.
" Would he kill you?" I asked.
" No," he whispered. " He would have killed her."
I gaped. Kill Lily?
" That's why she's better off with you, even if you are a Potter."
I smiled lightly. " You'll be invited."
" I'll be there. You won't see me though." He wasn't smiling, but not frowning either.
" How will I know you're there?" I asked.
" I promise I'll be there. Even if the Dark Lord kills me later, I'll be there." He shrugged, " Someone has to give away the bride."
" What if he does kill you?"
Severus didn't even hesitate. " Then I will have deserved it for what I've done."
" Done? You think you should die?" I asked, stunned.
He looked at me in confusion. " How thick are you Potter? All those muggle raids, wizard attacks, people disappearing and then showing up dead, robberies. That's us. We're attacking innocent people. I've killed. But not for the innocent, but the innocent. I've killed them. I have watched others die and done nothing to stop it. Do you think I have any real reason to live?"
I thought for a second. " Lily. Live for her. She's still your friend, maybe enemies in society's eyes, but in mine you're still her friend as long as you have meaning to her. After she says you mean nothing, only then can you die by choice," I said firmly.
" I can't die in this war?" he asked. " After everything I've done?"
" You're a great wizard, I'll admit that much. But you won't die. Not now that you have a reason to keep living, and keep fighting. Fight for her," I answered.
Severus turned toward the window, looking out.
I took this as my cue, and rose, placing a single piece of paper on his chair before I left.
I looked back once before I shut the door.
-l-Severus-l-
For a long time I didn't move.
I had let him marry her.
I sighed and walked to where I had heard him leave something.
I picked it up, and turned it over.
Lily.
A picture of her smiling, her green eyes sparkling with joy, and her red hair flying as she laughed.
I told myself that I would love her forever.
And I never stopped fighting for her.
Until.
The.
Very.
Very.
End.
Every
breath
I
breathed
for
her.
