RUBY RED
Chapter 9
***Ruby Red***
Kagome stood over the pot of morning stew and breathed in the sweet, hot aroma with a contented sigh. Something about Kaede's place just felt good!
She had said good morning to the old woman and set about making breakfast after asking if her friends could come in to eat as well. Kaede didn't mind of course, she never did.
As Kagome swirled her hand over the steam to coax it toward her awaiting nose, she felt a familiar tingle run up her spine. She stood up and turned her head to the door, contemplating the idea of waiting to go outside until after breakfast. She was really wary to see him again, but still a little eager…and she was very hungry.
The presence felt quite insistent though, and with a sigh she decided that breakfast could wait.
"Kaede, do you mind watching this for me? It should be done any minute now"
When the old woman nodded, Kagome thanked her and turned away.
She squinted as the sun filtered in through the doorway when she stepped out. She had been up for almost an hour now and still she felt groggy and the sun felt like a thousand needles piercing her too-thin skin over her eyes.
A few rapid blinks cleared her vision and she made her way down the small slope and across the bridge outside of town. Under the shade of an old oak tree, she saw him lounging with his back against the bark.
The morning dew sparkled around him and made his otherwise soft hair look almost ethereal. He was so damn gorgeous.
She realized she was staring and quickly muttered an apology before walking over to sit with him. It took her a few minutes to find the correct way to break the silence, and truly she didn't think she was quite on target, but still it would have to do. They couldn't stay in silence all day. She was hungry damn it!
"This better be quick"
When she caught his eyes staring her down with his signature single brow raised, Kagome sighed and waved him off.
"Sorry, I'm hungry and breakfast is probably ready now"
"What are you wearing?"
Kagome looked down and almost laughed; that was not what she had expected him to say after all this time.
She was wearing her old and much worn out sweat pants that were cut into shorts and a slightly too-small t-shirt. The ensemble probably wouldn't last another season, but it was so comfy that she just wasn't ready to give it up to the pyre yet.
She shrugged lightly and told him it was a bit of what she had left over from the future, though it had seen better days. With her time in the mountains with the wolf clans, she had found that comfort was a luxury and she was going to eat it up while she could.
"So you've been with the wolves. It would explain the smell"
"The smell? Do I smell bad?"
Kagome lifted her arm to her nose and sniffed lightly; she was trying to catch whatever scent he had drawn from her but couldn't tell if what she smelled was the same. She could smell the slight mustiness that came with the furs and seemed to cling to her skin unless she bathed…which she had done so this morning, but other than that she wasn't sure.
Kagome shrugged and went to drop her arm in her lap. She would have succeeded if it weren't for the large clawed hand that suddenly shot out and grabbed her wrist. If she hadn't been wearing the leather bands, she thought his nails might have pierced her skin with as careless as he was being.
"Hey!"
"What is this for?"
Kagome looked down and saw the arm band. She really didn't want to get into the story of how she had come across the leather bindings, but she had to tell him something. So long as he didn't ask her to take it off she would be okay; otherwise he might see the rather large scar running up her arm from Mare's claws.
"The arm band was a gift from Kouga. It's for Mare. She'll be here in a few days"
"You allowed the wolf to present you with a gift?"
"Well, more like the Great Wolf gave it to me, but yeah I guess. Even though it was for my protection, he had Kouga wait to give it to me until after I had completed the Great Wolf's very grueling training. It was really only basic training, but since I don't have as much time as the demons up there, we had to sort of modify things a bit"
Kagome realized she was starting to ramble a little and say things that were clearly irrelevant and so bit her lip to shut herself up.
"I see"
Her arm suddenly dropped into her lap and she looked at it curiously. Did that offend him somehow? She didn't see how it could have, but then with him one could never be sure.
Kagome shrugged and stood up.
"I'd really like to catch up with you, but I'm famished. Inuyasha made us run for almost straight through. The only sleep I got was in the arms of my guard or on Inuyasha's back when they were kind enough to walk, and the only food I got was small bits of dried meats and a piece of fruit every other day. A real meal really sounds quite fantastic right now"
Her stomach chose that moment to be vocal and seemed to agree with her. She caught his smirk and nearly scowled. She couldn't help it that she was hungry!
"Right, so maybe later today?"
She watched in quiet envy as he stood fluidly and began to walk away.
"Perhaps another day. I must prepare my generals for the upcoming weeks. I will see you at the council meetings"
Kagome nodded and turned away to find her breakfast. In hindsight, she probably should have set up an actual day with him to talk in private because there was no such thing as privacy in the middle of war.
***Ruby Red***
"KAGOME!"
Said girl turned around at the sound of her name and smiled in pleasant shock.
"Oh my gosh Rin, what are you doing here?!"
She allowed the girl to pull her into a hug and nearly laughed at the way she stepped back and apologized.
"No worries Rin; I don't follow the rules and don't really expect everyone else to do so all of the time. I won't tell if you won't"
With a wink, Kagome grabbed the other girl and linked their arms to start walking through the town.
"Seriously though, what are you doing here? I thought that you were out at Sango's village with Kohaku"
"I was, but Sesshoumaru-sama said that the safest place was here so here I am. They'll be here soon as well anyway."
Kagome smiled at the wistful look that came over her young friend. She was certainly falling for Kohaku it seemed.
"What has that handsome little demon slayer been up to lately anyway? Has he given you any exciting courting gifts?"
She caught Rin's blush and laughed.
"You don't have to tell me anything too personal. I won't pry"
"Thank you Kagome. He did give me a lovely trinket."
Kagome looked down to the little dragon charm on a necklace that Rin held up for her perusal. It was very detailed and held a single emerald stone for the eye. All in all, the charm was very good quality and most certainly was his gift to signify his wealth.
Kagome smiled and nodded to Rin.
"It's beautiful. I think he'll be very good to you. Has he been respectful?"
Rin smiled a small secretive smile.
"Yes. I don't think he likes the idea of being taught a lesson by both his sister and Sesshoumaru-sama. They can both be quite scary when they want to"
Kagome had to agree with that.
"What about Miroku?"
"Miroku-sama tries to get Kohaku-kun into trouble more often than not. He'll be the reason Sango-san gives Kohaku-kun a stern talking to I think"
She giggled and got caught up in her memories. Kagome watched from the corner of her eye with a smile and guided her to Inuyasha's hut. They could sit there and have tea and catch up. She wanted to know all the good details that Rin was willing to spill!
***Ruby Red***
That evening, as the sun dipped low on the horizon, Kagome stood atop the small hill that overlooked the valley behind the old well and lost herself in her memories. She could almost see everyone sitting on the hillside and enjoying one of their few breaks near the village.
The time they had spent hunting down Naraku had been the best and worst years of their lives. It brought them together in ways that nothing else ever could.
Kagome smiled in a sort of bittersweet contentment. They would always be together, and it seemed that they would always be fighting. There was always one enemy or another bent on world domination or some such nonsense.
Of course, the group had yet to come across another enemy the magnitude of Naraku, but they were always prepared for such an occurrence.
Kagome turned back towards the village and started walking along the path that would lead her to Kaede's hut. She knew that dinner would be done soon and she did not want to miss out.
Her short walk was interrupted by an unexpected, though not altogether unwelcome, person.
"May I walk with you?"
Kagome turned with a smile and nodded before taking the proffered arm and continuing on the path to the village.
"You know, Inuyasha isn't very fond of you"
"Oh? And why is that?"
"It's a long story. Suffice it to say that he is very protective of me…and not in a brotherly way"
"Shall I consider him competition then?"
Kagome blinked a few times and peeked out of the corner of her eyes to study Hideko's profile. Should she ask? Would it be smart to get into this conversation now?
Well, the longer she waited, the less certain she would be. That's what had started the problems between her and Inuyasha so long ago and she was not about to start that nonsense again.
"Hideko, what is it you are looking for?"
Yes, straight and to the point was best…right?
She noticed that he took a bit of time to formulate a proper response, which bothered her if she were to be honest. Was he unsure of what he wanted?
"I would like to get to know you better so that we might begin the process of courting"
Kagome stopped in her tracks and stared straight ahead to the lights of the village, her hand coming loose from his arm.
"Kagome?"
"You want to begin a courting."
She wasn't asking and she knew that he understood that by the way his body stiffened in response.
"Yes"
With a slow and deep breath, she turned to face her guard and offered him a disarmingly guarded smile.
"I am not"
She watched as he sorted through her short response and recognized the exact moment the full impact of her words sank in on him. The way his eyes clouded over in anger and confusion, and the way his fingers flexed but never clenched into fists told her more than just the simple fact that he was angry and offended. It also told her that he was not ready for a relationship of such commitment; it was especially true if he could not accept his suit being turned down every now and again.
Kagome let out a slow sigh and shook her head as she began to walk away.
"You are a fun person to be around, and I'd really like to keep it that way. Don't let your emotions cloud your happiness, Hideko. It's not worth it"
With that said, Kagome left her guard standing in the middle of the path to contemplate the reality of his obsession with the Priestess known as Kagome.
***Ruby Red***
Dinner was an uneventful affair that night; although it was slightly louder than usual with Sango and her family in attendance, along with Rin, Kohaku, Kouga, Ayame, Inuyasha, Kaede and herself. Still, Kagome couldn't help but feel the deafening silence that Hideko's absence had left.
She understood that she had offended him, but it was almost disheartening that he would give up so easily. In a way, Kagome almost wanted him to try for her hand regardless of what she had told him. It would have been a relief to know that someone out there found her worth fighting for.
Still, he did not show up and she later found out that he had returned to the Northern Mountain range. Kouga had told her that he had sent the captain back in order to inform the Great Wolf that an appropriate living area had been secured, but Kagome had seen the look in Ayame's eyes when she had asked about Hideko's whereabouts. It didn't take a genius to figure out that Kouga had not 'sent' him anywhere, but that Hideko had 'requested' to leave.
In the end it would all be for the best, but she still felt a little guilty. She had been so forward with him from the very beginning and it made her stomach turn to think that she had been so cruel. What honest woman came onto a male like that and then turned him down?
Kagome walked along the path that looked down over the small river running through Edo. It still sparkled with a fantastically clean quality. She knew though, that soon the rivers would run red and ruin more than just the drinking tins.
"Kagome!"
Said girl turned at the call of her name and nodded to her companion before turning back to the river and continuing her walk.
"You okay?"
"Mm hmm. Just thinking"
"About that stupid captain?"
Kagome smiled and continued walking; she figured a lack of response was good enough an answer.
A few minutes passed by as the two of them walked in companionable silence and just enjoyed the warm night air.
"You know he wasn't good enough for you."
Kagome stopped and stared down into the waters below her, trying to catch a glimpse of her reflection from so high up.
"You say that about me a lot, but I have to wonder if it isn't the other way around"
She turned to look into hauntingly gorgeous amber eyes and soaked in the confusion that shined within them. He opened his mouth to respond and she decided that she didn't want to hear his excuses anymore.
"It isn't only you, Inuyasha. I've had a bit of bad luck with males and I'm not in the mood to entertain some other person's perspective of the life that I have to live… especially not a male's perspective. I'm not in the mood to be nice about this either, so really, let's drop it"
She saw the shock run through him and watched with a closed expression as that changed to confusion, then anger, and finally settled on something she figured was acceptance. There was no denying the fact that he would bring it up again later, but for now he had accepted her lack of interest in the subject, which was all she really needed right then.
When he turned to leave, Kagome found that she did not want to be alone any longer and frowned.
"Stay with me"
She saw him pause and consider her request for a minute. His response was somewhat expected, though disappointing nonetheless.
"Kagome, I can't"
"I'm not really asking for much…just some company. Please?"
Gods, she was begging him for crying out loud. What was worse was that she didn't even know why she felt this urge to have his company. She just knew that she didn't want him to leave her alone tonight.
"Alright, but just for tonight"
Kagome nodded and turned her attention back to the river, all the while wondering what he meant by that.
***Ruby Red***
They had stood by the river for a long while, neither talking nor ignoring each other. It was comfortable and lonely all at the same time and it hurt her to know that it was her fault. She was in such a melancholy mood over her less than stellar love life that she couldn't help but to be bad company.
Now, as they sat together in front of the fire in Inuyasha's house, she couldn't quite figure out if she wanted to kiss him or run from him. She figured it was a little bit of both really.
"Why are you being so hard on yourself lately?"
Kagome blinked and looked over at him, wondering just how much she wanted to tell him. In all reality, she wanted to tell him everything because it hurt to keep it all in all of the time, but she didn't want to tell him anything because she didn't want his pity…and she didn't want to sound like a whining baby.
She turned back to the fire and leaned her head against his shoulder, allowing the weight of her body to fall into him.
"I am not."
"Are too. You're always acting tough but you're really just being tough on yourself."
"Why does this matter?"
She was tired of this subject already. She would very much like for someone to understand her and this depressing feeling that continued to press down on her soul, but she just couldn't find the energy to bother with it. What was the point anyway?
"Because you matter"
Kagome blinked away the tears that threatened to fall. She couldn't agree with him because everything she'd experienced spoke starkly of the exact opposite.
"Since when?"
Her voice was barely more than a whisper and she cringed at the desperation that trickled into her words.
"Since always. Don't you understand anything? You are one of the most important people I know!"
"Important…"
Kagome sat up and stared hard into the fire, trying to discern her sudden distaste for the term 'important people'. She felt like one of those celebrities from the modern age. They had always talked about how they were so rich and so famous and that no one knew them really and that it was so lonely. She had always thought that they were just crying out for more attention…until now that is.
In a way, she was a celebrity in the warring states era, and now she understood what all of those celebrities had been talking about. It wasn't about having people around you, it was about having people that cared about you. It was about having someone all to yourself that you could give yourself to and trust enough in them to not drop and break you.
It was something that she felt that she had been lacking sorely.
There were friends and acquaintances around her sure enough, but there was no one there that cared for her and her alone.
When she heard him leave, she tried not to feel the bitter pain of loneliness spiking in her breast and she forced herself not to turn to watch him go. Whatever it was that she was hoping to get from him, she knew she wouldn't get it. She also knew that she shouldn't be trying to get anything from him at all.
She knew that Inuyasha and Kiri were not together right now, but she also well knew that they would be together if they were ever able to be so in the future. And besides, that whole scenario was just a mess and a half, and she really didn't want to drop back into old habits like that.
Kagome nearly jumped out of her skin when she felt Inuyasha settle himself behind her, pulling her to him and tucking her between his legs. She didn't even think about it when she curled up against his chest and turned her head to let her tears fall against his strangely bare chest.
She didn't feel so shocked about that, but she did wonder what on earth he was thinking. The thought was sobering enough to give her the clarity she needed to stop her tears.
"What are you doing?"
"It's called comfort you baby!"
Her shock at his words was nearly palpable. She could feel his heart beating behind his chest and raised her hand to feel the heat that radiated from him. His skin was incredibly soft and oh-so-firm. It was slightly intoxicating.
"Do you have any sake?"
"Kagome, what do ya want that for?"
Kagome shrugged and scooted away from him before standing up by the fire. She wanted it so that she could get away from these feelings, from the clarity of it all, and so that she could have the excuse of not knowing what she was doing when morning came around. But she didn't want to tell him that she was willingly walking into a weakness like that.
"I don't think you should have that"
"I don't think I should either… that's why I want it"
"What?!"
"We always want what we can't have"
Kagome turned blazing eyes to her once-upon-a-time crush and contemplated the amount of complication she could add to her life if she just let herself go for one night. She watched as he stood up and walked until he stood directly in front of her.
"Kagome, don't do this"
She felt a tingle of anticipation course through her body and closed her eyes. Whatever she chose, he would follow. He had the freedom to walk away whenever he chose, but he was still standing there with her. He was male, after all, and they were all so predictable…except for his brother of course.
Her eyes shot wide and she turned away from Inuyasha to stare at the ground. How could she be thinking like that about Inuyasha when she had been with his brother? What would Sesshoumaru think if she did anything at all with Inuyasha?
She narrowed her eyes in anger and balled her hands into fists. Who cared what he thought? They were not a couple; never had been and never would be! What should his thoughts matter anyway?!
Kagome spun to the side and grabbed onto Inuyasha's arms before forcefully pressing her lips against his. She had moved so fast that she was certain that she had surprised him, but she wanted to prove even if only to herself that Sesshoumaru held no power over her. She was free to do as she pleased…as she had always been! But Inuyasha surprised her by responding to her assault.
She felt his hands pull at her hips until her body met with his and his lips move against hers in ways that proved that he knew what he was doing. The shiver that made its way down her body caused her to grow warm with want.
When she felt him pull away from her, she almost whimpered. When she felt him pull her tighter against him, she almost purred.
His head came down to rest on her shoulder and she closed her eyes.
"Kagome don't! Please don't do this…"
His voice tapered off to a whisper and she felt like stomping and screaming her frustrations. Why was it so hard for her to keep someone close to her? Why was it so hard to get someone to come that close in the first place?
"I just need someone to be with me"
"Not like this you don't. You're going to hurt yourself and I can't be a part of that. I do enough damage on my own"
Kagome sighed and pushed away from him. She walked around him and into the bedroom without as much as a glance.
"You know where to find me if you change your mind"
She closed the door behind her and fell onto the bed in a fit of silent tears. It really did hurt to be rejected…even if it was just for sex. In some ways that felt even worse because there was nothing more than pleasure to be had and still she was being turned down. She had to be something awful if that wasn't even good enough for him!
Kagome woke up the next morning shivering and cold. She looked around to find that she had slept on top of the blankets without meaning to. It also meant that Inuyasha had not come in to check on her.
Her heart clenched in pain and she frowned. She didn't want to live like this. Why did she feel like it was so important that she be with someone? She was independent and strong and didn't need anyone, so what was the problem really?
Kagome shook her head and began to ready herself for another day. She didn't know the answers to her questions and after last night's debacle, she wasn't about to go around asking for advice. She would just have to go on ignoring this little issue like she had before. It had worked well enough back then, so there should be no problems going back to that.
***Ruby Red***
Inuyasha walked through the forest lost in thought. He was so confused about everything that had happened and he didn't know what to do.
He had started to follow after her at first, but he had smelled the salt in the air from her tears and heard the door creak when he pressed it open. The sound and smell had snapped him out of his daze and he stood at the doorway just watching her sleep.
She was a beautiful mess and in so much pain emotionally, but he wasn't sure how to help her. He didn't want her to be hurt anymore, especially not by him. That was the reason he had walked away last night; he decided to leave the hut and let her sleep in peace for once.
Her offer was so damn tempting that he was a little surprised that he had been able to walk away from her at all, let alone stop once she had started kissing him. And that kiss was like a heaven that set his blood to fire.
The only reason he could think that he was able to stop before he hurt her more was because he respected her too much for that. Besides, hadn't he yelled at his brother for taking advantage of her emotional instability? What kind of a person would he be if he did the same thing to her?
Inuyasha shook his head and stared out at the foliage around him. Sometimes he wondered if it wouldn't be better to just walk away one day and never come back. He had really liked the life of a vagabond, always running, never stopping, never bothering with all of the little details involved in friends and families. That had always been the lives of other people, but not him…never him.
He'd had Kikyou so many years ago in love with him in her own tragically twisted way. There was Kiri who was willing to give her life to ensure that the other half of his species would get a fighting chance to live, even though it meant they would likely never see each other again.
And then there was Kagome, the beautiful, intelligent woman from the future that was currently sleeping in his bed after crying herself to sleep because he didn't give into the pleasures of her flesh. Gods he was so stupid sometimes!
But then again, this was best thing for her and she had always put him and his needs in front of her own. It was high time someone did that for her. He could only do so much though; he knew that she needed someone of her own to come home to her and whisper sweet nothings in her ear all night long. And Gods help him if he didn't want to be that person sometimes…
Inuyasha closed his eyes and breathed in the forest around him, allowing it to fill his lungs and flow through his veins. There had to be someone out there that would love her unselfishly…she just had to wait for that person. Until then, Inuyasha decided, he would be there for her.
***Ruby Red***
Several days passed by without incident and Kagome found that the mundane routines of the village were exactly what she had needed. She and Inuyasha no longer shared a bed, and to be frank, she didn't really notice it when he was around anyhow. Slowly but surely she was starting to feel like her old chipper self again.
She and Sango had spent some time catching up and discussing plans for the village. As women, they would be responsible for the safety of the village and its people from within, while the men took to the battle on the field.
It was with this goal in mind that Kagome found herself running around the town taking stock of supplies, creating a township list complete with village registry, electing officials for ordinance during war, and meeting with previous officials and the town headman to tidy up loose ends.
While the war was most probably still many months away, Kagome decided to be prepared now and to keep vigilance throughout the quiet months to better prepare the people of Edo for the life that was coming at them full force. It was no secret that war was coming, but what continued to be unclear was what side of the battlefield each person would be on.
Kagome wanted to believe that all of the people of Edo would be sensitive to their plight and that they would stand with them through this war. But she was nothing if not a realist and she knew that there were plenty among them that would sooner turn against a demon to save their own hide than to pick up a sword or a gun and turn it on a fellow human being.
War was always difficult that way. Harder decisions were always made in the heat of the moment, and the outcome of a war could never be predicted.
"Priestess. Priestess!"
Kagome turned around and peered into the crowd around her, trying to find the person that was calling out to her. She saw a hand waving frantically above the heads of the crowd and saw a young man jumping up and down while trying to make eye contact with her. With a nod, she pushed her way into and through the crowd.
It took a bit of shoving and no small amount of 'excuse me's for her to reach the young male. When she arrived, she was met with a sight that made her stomach turn. There was a young female sitting on the ground, propped up against the side of a shop and bleeding everywhere. Her head was bowed so Kagome wasn't sure if she was awake or not, but she could see the movements of her chest as she breathed in and out slowly.
One of her arms appeared to be broken, but other than that there was no telling what else was wrong. There was too much blood and dirt. Why had no one else noticed this?
Kagome looked up the road and back down to the male that was kneeling in front of the female and whispering to her.
"Can you carry her?"
She watched his eyes turn from her to the female and back again before he nodded and stood up. She watched as he gathered the female into his arms and turned on her heel.
"This way"
Kagome maneuvered her body through the crowd in a way that would cut a small path for her new patients. She wasn't sure who these people were or where they came from, which worried her a bit since she had mandated a village registry, but in the end these were just people that needed her help.
When she cleared the crowd on the far side of town, Kagome sighed in relief. She opened the flap to Inuyasha's hut and ushered the couple in while silently thanking the Gods that he was not home. Kaede's place was just a bit too far away; this female clearly needed medical attention immediately.
She moved around the couple and swiped her arm across the low lying table to clear it off. Once free of debris, she motioned for the male to lay down his charge so that she could get to work.
"What's your name?"
"Kintaro"
"Kintaro, there are several linens just around the wall behind you. Please retrieve them for me. I'll also need the basin of water in the room across from the linens."
She didn't wait to see if he would respond or not, opting instead to end all conversation and begin working on her new patient. The girl looked fairly haggard, but if experience taught her anything, it was to never judge a book by its cover. She had to get this mud and dirt off so that she could see the true extent of the damages.
Kagome grabbed a kettle of water from the corner of the room and set it to boil over the seemingly-constant flames in the fire pit. She wondered how it was that Inuyasha was able to always have that going.
When she returned to the female's side, she noticed that she was still sleeping, though slightly fitful. She noticed that Kintaro had returned with the requested items and so she took a minute to nod her thanks.
"Are you injured?"
"No. A few scratches I think, but nothing serious. Is she going to be okay?"
Kagome paused and looked up to find deep brown eyes staring down at her in worry and hope. She could understand that moment because she had been there all too many times. But she couldn't give him false hope. Instead, she returned her attention to her patient.
"I don't know yet. Could you please go to the head Priestess' hut at the bridge on the west side? There you will find a woman named Sango. Tell her that Kagome has a patient and needs help. Tell her I'm at the hut. She will know what to do if you deliver her that message"
When he nodded, Kagome didn't see it. When he left, Kagome didn't notice. When the girl stopped breathing, Kagome only worked faster.
***Ruby Red***
Okay, okay, so here you go. Who are Kintaro and this mysterious female friend of his? And what on earth happened to them?
Guess you'll have to wait to find out. J At least our darling girl has a distraction now to keep her mind off of her strange bout of loneliness. We can't have her getting depressed now… can we?
