A/N I do not own TMNT, but I am forever grateful for their existence.
Also the ever-wonderful-and-lovely SetoAngel01 drew some awesome fanart for chapter 8 on her tumblr. It involves the tail talks so you all need to go check it out! She also has been doing some pretty fantastic Raphril fanfic, which is def worth reading! "Afterglow" is perfect if you need a good dose of some 2k12 Raphril fluff.
Eldest Siblings
It had only taken the better part of her endurance but finally, come the evening after April's return to her newly painted apartment, the sweltering heat of summer had finally begun to wane. With September little more than a week away, it was about time that things in New York City started to cool. Not that the redhead had all that much to complain about; after all she had been fortunate enough to spend the worst of the heatwave below ground in her friends' home. The turtles' Lair may be a lot of things, but it was a pretty sweet spot to spend one's time when the city above was being grilled on black pavement while being marinated in smog.
Nonetheless, even though her apartment was not quite as ideal in the temperature department as the guys' place, April was still relieved that her landlord had finally finished his work allowing her to return. She loved the turtles, but she loved her home as well. There was just something about having her own personal space that she had missed. Maybe it was because she no longer felt compelled to wash her dishes the instant she made them, or maybe it was because she was no longer at the constant mercy of turtle sneak attacks – unintentional or otherwise – but either way she was more than pleased as she plopped herself onto her suede couch that Tuesday evening.
It had been another long day at work, and she was looking forward to simply putting up her feet, skyping with Robyn, and then maybe finishing the day with a cool shower before bed. With a little of Michelangelo's leftover risotto mixed in for her dinner, April was anticipating the evening to be as a whole rather successful – and it wasn't even six yet! After throwing open her windows – to get the residual paint fumes to abate – and dinner in hand, she soon had her laptop open on her coffee table awaiting her cousin's call.
Ten minutes later, the infamous skype chime broke through the constant song of the city around her. She could not resist smiling at her screen as Robyn's freckled face appeared, "Hey Rob!"
"Hiya stranger!" April rolled her eyes as her cousin smirked at her own wit, "How're things in the Big Cheese?"
"You mean apple," The New Yorker replied dryly.
"To-may-toe, to-maw-toe. So I see you're no longer homeless."
"Yep, my landlord, Bill, called me last night with the good news."
"What? Is your boyfriend's place really that bad?"
Robyn teased out the word with the full intention of causing April to give the usual response of, "He is not!" but with all the chaos of breaking the news to Raphael's family and being temporarily evicted, April hadn't actually talked to her "big sister" in several weeks. Of course they still texted regularly, and Robyn knew April had crashed at Raphael's place the last few days, but as of yet, April hadn't broken the news that her and the mutant turtle were officially an item. It wasn't that she was ashamed of Raphael; in fact it was Robyn she was concerned of. She knew the moment she told her cousin what had transpired it would be interrogation central, and frankly, April wasn't all too sure how to go about it. She imagined she would have to tell her cousin the truth eventually, but putting it off for as long as possible was far too appealing to resist.
Too bad the awkward silence April gave in lieu of taking Robyn's bait was as revealing to the elder as if April had just proclaimed her feelings loudly to the heavens. "OH. MY. GAWD." Robyn's eyes were as wide as saucers, "YOU ARE DATING! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?!"
"Uh…" April rubbed her forearm nervously, "I was going to tell you…"
"When?!" The younger red-head shuddered under the impaling excitement of her cousin's tone, "No, never mind, there are more important things to discuss than you keeping the details of your romantic life from your big sister you little vixen! How long have you two been a thing?!"
"Two weeks as of yesterday." April felt her mouth automatically smile at the memory.
"Two weeks…" Robyn's eyes narrowed at the memory, "That's the night I talked to him! I guess he's got balls if my "kick your ass" line didn't freak him out."
"Trust me Robyn," April chuckled despite her nerves, "There is no way you could take Raph on."
"Ooo," The elder teased, "You even have a nickname for him!"
"I didn't give it to him; his brothers have called him that for years."
"He has brothers?"
"…" Oh shit. They were getting deeper with every step, "Yes, three."
"Geez, that's a lot of testosterone. Good thing you've got a sis whose husband has two. I can give you advice."
Purposely ignoring Robyn's wink, April attempted to divert the subject, "Speaking of, how is Colin?"
"Oh he's fine. No changing the subject! When do I get to meet him?"
"Uh… Isn't it a bit early for that?"
Robyn huffed, "Fine. Do I at least get to see a picture?"
"Uh…" April tried to think fast, but kept hitting a wall, "I don't have one?"
"BS Ace. You've known him for months. You must have a picture. What's his Facebook?"
"He doesn't have one." At least that was the truth.
"Who doesn't have Facebook?" Robyn sounded grossly offended at the very idea.
"Lots of people." April retorted, "Some people do value their privacy you know."
"Hmph, so I've heard." Robyn frowned, "I'm still not buying that you don't have a single picture of the guy."
"Well, I don't."
Well, technically she did. Lots and lots of baby photos from Raphael's pre-mutation days, but there was a significant lack of post-mutation pictures. Understandably, the guys were more than reluctant to have their image caught on film. April had learned her lesson after the Sacks' fiasco. As nice as it would be, she resisted taking any further pictures that would provide evidence to the existence of six foot tall mutant turtles. She had even deleted the grainy photo from that night on the rooftops. It just wasn't worth it.
"So not only will you not let me meet him, but you won't let me see a picture. You know, if I hadn't talked to him on the phone, I'd be wondering if he's even real." Oh he was real, but Robyn wouldn't believe how unbelievable Raphael was. "I just don't get why you're being so secretive about this. Usually you're pretty open when you hook up with a new boy."
"I just don't want to rush things…" April sighed, "Or scare him off."
"Again, I reiterate: I threated to Kick His Ass! If he's still around, I don't think you have anything to worry about."
"It's not that simple!" April blurted out.
"How is it complicated?" Robyn ticked off on her fingers to emphasize, "One: You like the guy and he likes you. Two: You both confess your feelings. Three: You both become official. Four: You tell each other's families."
"Oh? Is that the "official protocol" on how to go about dating someone?" April quipped sardonically.
"It should be!" The elder retorted, "How else are poor siblings ever going to get any details?"
"Because my romantic life is your sole source of entertainment. I didn't realize they pulled "Days of Our Lives" off the air."
"Hey, don't knock it 'till you try it!"
"Yeah, that's not going to happen."
Huh. If April ever somehow figured out a way to introduce Robyn to her unorthodox friends, her and Master Splinter would probably become best friends for life over their shared love of sappy soaps. April would have to remember to tell Raphael that one. He'd definitely get a kick out of hearing that.
"Well your poor taste of fine television aside, I still don't understand why you won't give me a little more dirt, April."
"Look, Robyn, just because you want the details on every aspect of your little sister's-"
Knock. Knock.
April immediately silenced at the sound of rapping on her open window. Was it dark out already? She wasn't expecting Raphael, but of course she never turned down the opportunity to see him. Yet, she was startled by not the appearance of her buff, red-masked boyfriend, but instead his older brother, Leonardo. The turtle she hadn't seen in days – not since their confrontation in the Lair's kitchen.
April had spoken with Master Splinter in the morning, and apparently Leonardo had needed some space to go and deal with his current emotional turmoil. According to Master Splinter, Leonardo had never been one to openly show his emotions. Instead, he chose to continually put them aside. He felt just as powerfully as Raphael did, but unlike Raphael who dealt with his emotions as they came – often a messy process – Leonardo neglected to even acknowledge them. So when he eventually encountered an event which threw a strong enough blow to crack his defenses, often the eldest would find his entire emotional dam rupturing and as a result, would be at an utter loss as to how to even begin to deal with the fallout. Consequently, unresolved events from years past were not immune to making reappearances in such circumstances.
Although she now possessed a clearer view into the psyche of the lead turtle, April had still spent the remainder of the weekend fretting over Leonardo's absence. Raphael was trying to be there for her, but he struggled with his own feelings towards his brother. Frankly, Raphael was pissed and it was hard for him to see much more than anger when the topic of said blue-banded turtle came up. Admittedly, the Leonardo-related drama was part of the reason why April had been so thankful to finally go home.
So, to see him on her fire escape politely awaiting permission to enter her apartment when she was supposed to be having a relaxing evening talking to Robyn, left her more than a little unimpressed. However, despite her reservations, she still wanted to fix things with Leonardo, and if he had sought her out on his own, she could hardly turn him away. "What was that?"
April's eyes flitted back to her monitor. Oh right. Robyn. "Uh just a second Rob."
Turning the monitor so that the screen would only see the couch and her bed in the background, April dashed over to the open window, "Leo," she whispered, "This isn't the best time; I'm skyping with Robyn."
"I'm sorry to inconvenience you April, but I would really appreciate the opportunity to speak with you."
The turtle's formality only told April that he was uncomfortable. It gave her no insight as to how he currently felt towards her. "Alright. Just let me deal with Robyn."
Returning to her monitor as Leonardo smoothly slid through the narrow frame before gently easing the glass and then the blinds down, April was met with a glowering redhead, "You had better not be ditching me."
"Well uh…" April sighed, "I kind of am."
"Is Raphael here?"
April did not appreciate how Leonardo visibly stiffened from where he stood in the kitchen. "Um, no it's his brother actually." Shit, why did she just tell Robyn that? April tried not to wither under Leonardo's stern stare clearly denoting that she was treading on thin ice.
"Oh! Does he look like Raphael? Can I at least meet him?"
"No!" April snapped under the combined pressure from both eldest siblings' glares, "I mean… Uh…"
April balked when Leonardo walked up behind the monitor's screen and calmly spoke, "I'm sorry Miss – O'Neil?"
Robyn, clearly pleased at her progress to at least hear a new voice, chirped back, "Mrs. Wilson now – my wedding was only a few weeks ago."
"Ah congratulations, Mrs. Wilson. My name is Leonardo. I apologize for the interruption, but I'm afraid my brothers and I are rather – self-conscious – about our appearances."
"Oh right!" Robyn pounded her fist into her palm in understanding, "I totally forgot! Raphael told me about his skin condition. Is it hereditary then? It must be if you all have it."
Leonardo gave April a sharp look who could only subtly shrug, "Yes, it is. All of us have the same skin. Therefore, you must understand why we have requested April use the utmost discretion wherever our appearances are concerned, and we would greatly appreciate it if you did not heckle her further upon the matter."
April blinked wide-eyed at Leonardo. Did he just do that? Did he really just tell Robyn to back off of her interrogation – on April's behalf? "Oh…" Robyn visibly deflated, "I'm sorry. I didn't even think that she had a good reason to be so closed off about this… I was just curious. I hope I didn't offend you."
"Do not concern yourself with it. We are a unique circumstance, different from the norm. I would not expect you to behave any differently, especially where your loved one is concerned. However, despite our reclusive lifestyle, I can assure you that your sister is in good hands. Raphael thinks the world of her as do I and the rest of our family."
April could barely register Robyn's response. Her ears were ringing oddly as her brain tried to comprehend the magnitude of praise Leonardo had just bestowed on her. This could not be the same turtle who she confronted the other day. Where was the guy demanding an explanation for her ten-year-old-self's actions? "You'd be insane not to."
"Heh. So I've gathered." Leonardo gave a tiny grin, "My brother is a lucky man indeed."
"Well then, I guess we can catch up more later Ace." Robyn grinned sheepishly as she waved farewell, "Sorry about the grilling."
"It's okay Rob." April had to give Leonardo credit, she had been trying to figure out how to take Robyn down a couple of pegs for years when she was in moods like this one, and he had basically left her quiet and meek in all of ten seconds. "We'll talk more then, I promise."
The elder laughed somewhat half-heartedly, "I'll hold you to it. It was nice talking to you Leonardo."
"I enjoyed it as well. I've heard many good things about you from April. Goodnight."
Robyn frowned at the formality before smiling slightly while shaking her head, "Goodnight." Then she hung up.
Still more than a little disgruntled at what had just occurred, April looked up at Leonardo, "Wow... I've never seen Robyn back down so quickly."
He continued to stand stiffly from behind her laptop screen even as she closed the lid, "Sometimes the direct approach is the best. Nonetheless, the key is to tell enough of the truth while omitting the details you do not wish to share."
"Spoken like a true turtle who grew up with a house full of nosey brothers."
"Mikey can be particularly trying, yes."
They both endured uncomfortable silence until April sighed, "So? What is it that you could not wait to talk to me about?"
Leonardo fidgeted awkwardly, "I want to apologize for my behaviour a few days ago."
"You were undeniably an ass, yes," April quirked an eyebrow, "but I think we both know there's more to this than that."
"I…" He curled his toes subtly into the carpet before exhaling sharply, "It's not that I hold a grudge against you. You were a little girl and hardly in an adequate headspace considering the circumstances."
Growing impatient at his indirect answer, April frowned. "So are you or are you not still pissed at me for something I did fifteen years ago?"
"I am not angry with you for what you did," Leonardo's mouth was thin, "I'm concerned for what you choose to do in the future."
April gaped at him. She could not help but feel offended, "Why?"
"Please hear me out April." For the first time since he arrived their eyes truly met. April swore those eyes could freeze anyone's heart in fear, but now they were etched with indigo as though they themselves inspired the stormy sea, "My memories from those days are sparse at best and are filled predominantly with primal feelings and instincts. There are very few in which I can remember half as clearly as I can a dream. I relied on Master Splinter's memories to guide me as I grew, and for a long time I believed the little girl who cared for us in the lab to later rescue us from the fire, was our Hogosha, our guardian spirit. Then we met you April and suddenly that little girl was no longer some mystical being of legend, but true flesh and blood.
"Naturally I was delighted to be given the opportunity to not just thank, but become friends with our saviour. It was not until after everything that occurred with Sacks that I began to think. It made sense when you were a Hogosha that you had to leave us behind on earth for she was of the spirit realm and we were not. That theory no longer applied now that I knew you were real.
"The first few months after the Sacks' incident, I brushed it off; as you said, you were young and cannot be held accountable for those actions of the past. Yet, as I saw my brothers grow more attached to you – as I grew more attached – I began to worry. What if we were met with the same situation now? Would you leave us again?
"Again, I dismissed it. You had more than proved your loyalty to us when you not only risked your life to save us from Shredder, but your career by not revealing us to the world."
He paused and she murmured, "So then why, Leo? Why do you have such a problem with me and Raphael being together?"
Leonardo gave a tiny smile as he shook his head, "For an equally long time, I believed none of us would ever become close to a woman, let alone be granted their love. Then I saw Raphael fall in love with you, and incredibly, you returned his feelings. Raphael has always struggled to accept his place in the world – to accept himself. You changed that. You gave him hope and love, not just from you, but for himself. I wanted to be happy for you both – I was happy for you both – but then that nagging thought returned: what if she leaves him like she left us so long ago?
"Then it hit me. If you were to leave Raphael, it would be nothing like the day you left us in the storm drain. We were together. We had each other's strength and power. Now it is different. Now it is just you and him, and if you leave him, he will be shattered. Yes, he will have us – he always will – but that heart we grew together in that storm drain would be left with a hole that cannot be repaired, for now that Raphael had given his heart to you he can never have it back. If you leave, you will take his heart – a piece of our family – and Raphael will never recover from it.
"That is why I acted the way I did. Not out of some cruel grudge, but out of fear. The fear of you breaking my brother's heart. Don't you see, April? My family is everything to me. I would do anything to protect them. When I saw you as a threat to that harmony, I became angry and in turn I lashed out at you, for I was not just being protective of my brother but of you as well. I wanted to protect you from my own stupid nature. I wanted to protect you from my doubts. I am sorry April. I tried, but I could not hold them back from you.
"But now I know I cannot stop what is in progress, nor do I want to. I want both you and Raphael to have all the happiness in the world. Yet, it is my fear that cripples me so, and so I beg of you. Please do not leave us again. Please do not break my brother's heart."
And even though Leonardo did not say it, April read his thoughts: if she broke Raphael's heart, she would break them all. When she agreed to a relationship with Raphael, she began a relationship with his entire family. They were that strongly connected. She, the one who began it, could so easily end it all.
The very thought of doing such a thing devastated her. Didn't Leonardo see? Yes she had given Raphael her heart, but the whole family now bore the responsibility of protecting it. She was just as vulnerable as they were. She loved them just as much as they loved her.
After his long speech's conclusion, Leonardo shifted his weight from foot to foot in agitation, but his eyes still – albeit uncomfortably – held April's own. It was obvious he would not release her until he had an answer. Yet it was clear he had said all he intended and would patiently await her move.
"Leo I…" April swallowed trying to keep from choking on the precious chains that bound her heart to theirs, "I don't know if I can give you the answer you want. Not because I want to hurt you, but because there is no way I could ever hope to tell you how much you all mean to me and how devastated I would be if I didn't have Raphael – you – all of you – in my life. I may be bound more tightly to Raphael, but I am still connected to you. Don't you think I've realized that? Gosh Leo, isn't it obvious? You're my family too.
"I know you are scared of me leaving again, but you need to understand that I am not that little girl anymore Leo. I am me," she emphasized by placing her hand over her heart, "and I love you. I love you all and I would do anything to keep you safe and from harm. That's a promise."
Suddenly Leonardo looked so much younger. He always gave the impression of being older beyond his years, but at that moment April saw the young, insecure boy shining from his eyes, "You promise you won't leave?"
"Oh Leo," April stood up to cross the carpet to wrap her arms firmly around his plastron, "As long as I breathe, I will do everything to stay with you."
He gently wrapped his arms around her shoulders as he questioned, "Promise?"
"I promise, Leonardo."
His body gracefully extracted itself from her grasp. April did not miss the subtle darkening of his cheeks despite his polite little bow, "Thank-you April." He raised himself as he turned to the window, "I'll let you get back to your evening."
As an idea hit her, she lunged for his hand, "Hey Leo," April grinned as he turned curiously, "You want to stay and watch Star Trek with me?"
When Leonardo smiled, April knew all was well between them, "Shell yeah." For although Raphael held her heart, all the turtles protected it, just as she did theirs and always would.
A/N Sorry for the lack of direct Raphril, but a bit of Leo fluff never hurt anyone right? Besides Leo needed a moment because he was really struggling with some stuff. Also, I've always liked the idea of April having a nickname, but I have personally always hated "Ape." Thus, "Ace" was born with Robyn naturally being the one to introduce it.
To my lovely reviewers:
Nami Swannn: Yes I am! No one ever gets shoopuf the reference but I always thought it sounded hilarious XD Yeah... Leo did get that. He just struggles sometimes. Hopefully his motivation makes more sense now though. Thanks for reviewing!
arambo: Haha I'm glad you liked it XD I have to admit I was giggling more than normal when I was writing those scenes. Thanks for reviewing!
Guest: Yes Raphril for the win! That's one of the reasons why I've always liked these two: for their blend of romance and friendship. Thanks for reading and reviewing!
Larka13: Haha it's a talent what can I say? ;) I'm glad you're enjoying it! Thanks for reviewing!
SetoAngel01: BAHAHA… I love how we have escalated not just dino levels but to emails XD It's kind of awesome!
RBBBH: Thank-you! I probably enjoyed writing the tail scenes way too much, but it was so worth it! *Sigh* It's true… I did say I was the biggest pansy EVER when it comes to horror flicks though… Well, not the gory ones so much (cause my nerdy science side is all "and that's anatomically incorrect, and that's wrong, and that doesn't attach there…") but if there is a ghost/demon/supernatural anything I'm doomed. Maybe this is why I spend so much time watching ninja turtles all the time XD Consequently, I don't think you need to worry about me never writing again lol.
