CHAPTER NINE
Harry ducked under an oncoming spell. The beam of purple light smashed at the gates behind him, melting the rusted metal and sizzling, giving off a faint copper wift in the air. The sky was the colour of wet cement, the ground the color of the darkest coal and Slytherin the color of evil, if there was one. But Harry could sense a certain resonance coming from Lord Slytherin that transcended that of Voldemort or Grindelwauld. He had presence, but he had what all other dark lords lacked: a feeling of security. You could smell the confidence off him, the oozing arrogance and the sure way he was just playing with you like a cat playing with her food.
They traded curses back and forth in silence for a few minutes as each tried to gauge the other's skill level. Harry had to say: Slytherin was loads better than Voldemort, Harry could barely keep up with him.
"You are weak, boy, and not only that but you lack grace." Slytherin said. He was thin, long, wore plain black robes, had brown hair and red eyes and pasty white skin. "You must be like water." He stopped firing off rapid spells and breathed in deep. "Concentrate on your inner energy and just let it flow."
"Giving me tips are you?" Harry said. "Basikaro." He fired off a spell that wouldd turn Slytherin's body into a bundle of nerves. He dodged and shot back his own spell, a harmless stunner that whizzed by Harry's left ear.
"You will need them… boy," Slytherin sneered and moved so he was just a blur of his black cloak. One second he stood twenty feet away from Harry and the next he was right in front of Harry.
Slytherin raised a hand and backhanded Harry across the face. Harry tasted blood in his mouth as he fell to the ground. He ducked under a spell, dodged and weaved and rolled over as he fired off a simple stunner at Slytherin. "I will kill you." He said grimly as he stood up.
There was a lull in the battle as they both regarded each other with a critical eye. "That so?" Slytherin asked, mouth quiverin as he tried not to smile. "Pathetic. I should end it for you right now. Avada Ke-"
His eyes widened.
He laughed.
"This is wonderful! You have no soul do you?"
Harry scowled, "How do you know about that?"
Slytherin said nothing and he just laughed. Then he looked at Harry, dodged from the stunner Harry sent along his way and pocketed his wand. "Come on now, we should be friends."
"Friends?" Harry asked incredulously.
"Who put you up to this task? Who was it? Gryfindor? Whatever he's paying you, I'll double it."
"You really want to know?" Harry said as he stopped to get his breath back.
"Indeed I do, so why don't we sit down over a nice mug of ale in front of a hot fire and tell each other stories?"
"I… the offer is tempting, believe me," Harry said. "But I don't think I'm allowed. Wait hold on." He checked his pocket and pulled out that sheet of paper God had given him. On it, there was only one word: Go.
"Sure, lets do this." Harry said.
"First, an act of trust." Slytherin said and held out his hand. "Give me your wand."
Harry's eyes widened in incredulous amazement. "Fuck off, you can't expect me to really give you my wand right?"
"But I do, I can't have you killing me in your sleep."
Harry thought for a second: Jesus said go, he should go, trust the lord and all that. "Okay fine, lets go." He thrust the wand into Slytherin's outstretched hand. Slytherin smiled and did an about turn. "Follow me please," he said and walked into the castle.
Harry frowned and thought: "Can I kill him in hand to hand combat?" and on the heels of that: "What does he want from me anyways."
Slytherin led Harry through stark hallways, the walls painted a dull gray colour, the same color as the sky. He stopped in front of two double giant doors and turned to Harry. "After you, after all you are my guest."
Harry smiled a fake smile and went in, eyes narrowed in suspicion, body tensed and alert for any signs of Slytherin moving.
'Come on, come on, sit down by the fire." Slytherin said and pointed to two armchairs, brown, old, in front of a grate of hot still burning coals. Slytherin snapped his fingers and the coals erupted into a great big burning fire.
"Okay, so what do you want me for? I mean… why this?" Harry said as he relaxed into the chair.
"Normally I kill all my visitors. You are special."
"Lucky me," Harry said, rolling his eyes. "Come on, cut the crap. You want something."
"You are a hitman, right? An assassin?"
"Yeah," Harry said, not missing a beat. "What's up? After I kill you, you want me to hit someone else?"
Slytherin smiled softly, "You won't be able to kill me. Tell me who hired you."
"What for?"
"Ten thousand gold coins are hidden beneath this floor board." Slytherin said and tapped the hard wood floors. Harry noted the spot he tapped with interest. "If you kill me you can keep this. Until then, there's no harm in telling me… right?"
"I suppose not," Harry admitted. "It was Gryfindor." He lied.
"I knew it!" Slytherin said, glaring. "I hate that bastard. I'm going to kill him."
"I think you have more immediate problems right now," Harry said.
"From you?" Slytherin scoffed. "I have your wand boy, how dumb do you think I am?'
"Oh yeah," Harry said and grinned. "Jesus, wand please."
No answer. Nothing happened. "Jesus… I need my wand."
"This is it?" Slytherin asked.
"No wait a minute," Harry said and pulled out that sheet of paper. On it, Jesus wrote in spidery handwriting:
"Can't help you – fighing satan at the moment."
"Oh damn," Harry groaned. "You know what, I'm willing to call this whole thing off if you can match what Gryfindor is paying me."
"No…" Slytherin said.
"I'll even kill Gryfindor as a special bonus."
"Okay fine," Slytherin happily agreed. "How much do you need?"
"Ten thousand gold coins," Harry said. He couldn't believe his luck. What was wrong with Slytherin? Messed up in the head or something?
"Sure, I have it right here," Slytherin said and tapped the floorboard.
"Well, thanks, can you dig it out for me?" Harry asked. "And my wand too."
"Why not?" Slytherin said, shrugging. He reached into his pocket, waved his wand and the floorboard flew upward into the air like a rocket, revealing a wooden trunk the size of a modern day radio. He levitated the trunk toward Harry and then tossed Harry's wand back.
"I'll get to it right away." Harry promised as he took the two items. The trunk had a black handlebar which he used to carry it outside. Slytherin followed. "Give Gryfindor my best wishes, assassin."
"I will," Harry promised, not believing the ridiculousness of this world.
And so began his thousand missions – he learned a lot, learned how to be happy and optimistic all the time no matter what the situation. He learnt how to be humble and how to deal with any situation, he learnt how to fight, how to kill, he learnt many languages, he learnt a lot and became wise and strong as he moved deftly between world to world accomplishing all his missions with precision and cold calculation.
Then he was done.
His last mission had been simple enough: track down a vicous magical serial killer that had the whole world on its toes, much worse than Voldemort.
He had done it and now he was done everything.
All his missions.
Now he had his soul back – or would get it soon.
He closed his eyes and drifted off into sleep…
When he opened his eyes he was in a familiar white room, small, two chairs, one table. Jesus Christ sat on the first chair, dressed in a pearly white robe. Harry went and sat in the other chair. "Where's my soul?" He asked.
Jesus smiled, "you get more than that you know. Your soul as well as a world of your choice."
'Okay, I want a world where my parents are alive and where I am eleven years old. I want to be small, powerless and I want the world itself to be a happy place with no Voldemorts or anything."
"You want to be small? Powerless?" Jesus asked.
"Yes I do."
"But why?" Jesus asked.
"Because… because I'm tired of all this fighting, every day every night. I just wannt peace for the rest of my life – I don't even want these memories. I just want to live normally. Do you understand, Jesus?'
"I think I do," Jesus said. "I think I do Harry. Okay fine, I'll help you out here. Your family… The potters… do you want sibliings?"
Harry grinned. "As many as possible." He answered.
"How does two sisters and one older brother sound?"
"The sisters, they have to be twins. And mischevious too." Harry said. "I want to be as pathetic as possible. I know it sounds crazy but I just do alright?'
Jesus nodded. He conjured a pad and a paper and started scribbling furiously on it. "Are you sure though? You even want to lose your memories? You won't be the same person anymore then."
"I'm sure." Harry said grimly. "Damn I'm sure, its been hell for these past years, doing all sorts of dangerous missions. This is my retirement alright."
"Okay Harry," Jesus said and smiled. "Good luck in your new home."
"Yah, thanks," Harry said.
Jesus clapped his hands. Once. Twice. Thrice. Slowly Harry's vision faded, he smiled, as his existance as he knew it was vapourized.
It was time to start a new life…
A happier life…
Jesus had other plans though and instead put him in a life that would start off peaceful… but soon conflict will emerge in the form of Lord Dumbledore and Headmaster Riddle would be the standing between the evil Albus Dumbledore and the light side.
Jesus smiled. It was fun to mess around with souls like that.
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HARRY POTTER AND THE NEW LIFE…. CONCENTRATION GRADIENT PART TWO.
CHANGES: TENSE CHANGE, NOW IN FIRST PERSON.
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I like pancakes a lot, and my mom makes them every morning. Then when I have a good breakfast I go play quidditch till about noon with Matt, my older brother, and Lisa and Berinneta, my two twin sisters. Matt's in Hogwarts now, third year so I only get to see him in the summers. But its okay, I don't like him much anyway. He thinks so highly of himself, always has his nose in a book like a damn ravenclaw.
Not me though. I'm going to be hufflepuff. I knew it the minute I read about it in Hogwarts a History. That's me. I don't have any special talents, I really don't. I'm bad at quidditch, bad at my education (mom teaches us at home) and really really REALLY bad at magic. The only spell I can do is lumos and maybe a levitation charm. And that's after a long time of training. Mom and Dad have sort of given up on me now. I heard them one night talking about me. I had to go to the bathroom so I sneaked downstairs and I heard them. I really did. They said….
"Harry is terrible at magic and you know it," Lily (my mom) said tiredly over a cup of coffee. They were sitting side by side on the purple sofa in the den. It's a really old sofa, all torn and ripped up but it was my dad's (James Potter) mother's so we gotta keep it even though mom hates it a lot.
"He'll get better, Lily," James said as he stroked mom's red hair. "Don't worry about him. We have more important matters to discuss anyway."
"Like what?" Lily asked.
"Like this," James said and kissed her on the lips. Yup, pretty disgusting stuff and after I made the customary disgusted face I started to sneak up back the stairs when I heard mom say… "I'm afraid, James. What if the prophecy-"
"He'll be fine Lily, what do you have to worry about?" James said.
"You know what the prophecy said, Headmaster Riddle told us about it the other night. Don't tell me you forgot."
"Prophecies are stupid," James said, scowling. "Trelawnway's a fraud and you know it."
"Maybe but if Riddle said the prophecy was a real one, well I believe him." Lily said and sighed. Then she started repeating as if she were reading us poetry:
"When the three stars align at the right moment,
And the great warrior of the thousand stars repent,
Only then can the world be saved,
Only then can the dark lord be flayed,
The great warrior… born as the seventh month dies,
Surrounded in a shroud of dream like lies."
James rolled his eyes. "What a bunch of crap."
"I'm serious James!" Lily said and she got this glare in her eyes. Nobody argued with her when she got that glare; nobody dared.
"Okay fine, so what do we do about it? It could be Neville who's this great warrior. He was born as the seventh month dies too. It can't be just Harry."
"But what if it is?" Lily said. "Harry can barely do any spell. He can't run, he can't do wandless magic, his potions work is terrible, his intelligence level is average, his flying skills is-"
"Okay I get it," James said, annoyed this time. "Harry might not be good at this stuff. He might not have a lot of talents, but dammit, he's a Potter and all Potters are great warriors."
"Keep your voice down," Lily said. "I'm not saying he's not special, I love him so much, I really do."
"So what's the problem?" James asked.
"Well… great warriors fight right? I know for a fact that if Harry gets in a fight with any of Dumbledore's Death Eaters, he won't survive."
"It will be fine," James said. "It will be. Just trust me alright?"
"You know what house he wants to go to when he gets to Hogwarts?"
"What?"
"Hufflepuff."
James burst out laughing. "Him? A hufflepuff? Couldn't be, he's a Potter. All Potters go to Gryfindor… except Matt of course." James hastily added. "The twins will go into Gryfindor for sure, or maybe even Slytherin. They are cunning!"
"I'm talking about Harry," Lily said. "If he's the one in the prophecy… we're all done for and you know it."
"So what should we do?"
Lily rubbed her forehead, making little circles. "I don't know, James, I just don't know."
That's when I went up. My head was spinning with all this. What did it mean? What did the damn prophecy mean? I decided to write it down but my mind started getting muddled – and I have an excuse for that too, it was four a.m in the morning. James is an auror, no idea what he's doing up so long for.
I pulled a pad and a paper from my desk drawer and scribbled down the prophecy. I suppose now would be a good time to describe the room, huh? Well, my bed's alright, its got big red covers that are very fluffy like animal fur or something but I know that's not it because Lily hates animals to get killed so she would never buy that and when she's not doing her research for the ministry of magic she runs the house so I know for sure it isn't animal fur. Must be fake. My bed's my favorite spot in the whole house, except for the balcony arm chair though. That's a rocking armchair, its so fun to go out with a glass of lemonade and watch the sunset. I do it every night all year round, never missing one sunset.
Its my favorite hobby I must say. That and collecting rocks. I think I have the biggest rock collection in the world. My shoebox is magically enlarged and filled with thousands of rocks which I've collected whenever we've been on vacation and believe you me, we go on a lot of trips: Turkey, Paris, London, Hong Kong, Alberta, Toronto, New York, we've been all over the world and rocks are the only souvenirs I bother to get back. The shoebox is a nice black color, the same color as the color of my shoes and rests at the foot of my big bed on the plush turquoise carpets. The walls are also a kind of sky blue, I painted it myself. I like to draw and paint even though I am really bad at it, but I don't care, it kills time so its alright.
Now you might think I have no friends and that's true. We live on a farm. The nearest neighbor is a mile away. But mom takes us to parites and all, and I've met a few wizards my age like Neville, my best friend or Draco Malfoy, my worst enemy.
I scribbled the prophecy down on the pad of paper and stuck it under my bed. Then I sighed, boy I was tired. I yawned, drank a glass of water from the always refilling magical glass of water on the little stool next to my bed where my holly and phoenix feather wand lay. It came from the same phoenix Riddle has, Fawkes. Riddle's Hogwart's headmaster, old, eccentric, and once apprenticed to Albus Dumbledore, the evil dark lord who everyone's afraid to say his name. My family isn't though, we are cool like that.
I got into the covers, pulled it to my chest, snapped my fingers and the light shut off. Then I closed my eyes and prepared to sleep but I found I couldn't. I couldn't stop thinking about the prophecy, it weighed on my mind like a heavy… thing. I dunno, all I'm trying to say is that I was thinking of the prophecy, tossing and turning, and I was wondering:
Dark Lord is obviously Albus Dumbledore. But whose the great warrior? Is it… and this thought brought shivers up my spine. Good ones, adventurish ones. Is it me?
I kinda hoped it was. I am not the adventurous type, I'll tell you that. In fact I don't hunt after adventure at all. Remember, I am the hufflepuff of the family – hard working, loyal, that's about it.
II work hard though, I'll tell you that. Everything I do, I try my best and I never laze around like Matt, or the twins who are a year younger than me. I couldn't wait to go to my house, Hufflepuff. That would be scary, getting sorted though. Matt told me there were trolls.
The really scary thing however was that I was going to Hogwarts in one week! I tossed and turned, thought about the prophecy, Hogwarts, and then somehow I got to sleep. A deep and uneasy sleep.
I had a nightmare.
It was about some guy named Voldemort.
I forgot most of it when I woke up though.
