Well finally posting again thank you all for the patience that you all show to me and my story. I should be sleeping right now, but I'm not. I get to do one of my favorite things tomorrow so I'm to excited to sleep so you all get a chapter instead. Hope you all are well and safe. Yours Scifidryad
I was talking again two weeks after I made the choice to apologize to Wisdom. Scared Erik so bad when he came in for the day and I hoarsely said hello. Poor guy lost his balance on his cane. He was so shocked that I had answered him with my own voice rather then signing it. He stood there for a good minute before he walked back out without saying something. Then not even an hour later both Erik And Stephen come in. So I said hi to Stephen too. I was way more solid then I was, but I was still floating. The guys put some modesty shades around the tube. I had gotten to the point that my skin tone was returning back to normal, and just like last time no clothes. I still couldn't eat or drink but that would happen soon.
It took another month until I was able to be out of my cage. At first it was just for a minute or two then finally it was hours. I was not allowed to go outside. It was too much of a risk. The guys were afraid that I would float away with the first breeze that came by. It wasn't true but it was sweet of them to worry about me. Unnecessary but sweet. Erik's home was really nice, but all the metal inside that house was so him if not a bit stark. Everyone has there own preference. He had gotten ready for my emergence from my cage by hermetically sealing the house. I scared his poor housekeeper out of her skin. She jumped so much that I thought that she would hit the high rafters of the house. All I had wanted was some water. I was able to drink a little bit by then, and my body got use to it's normal functions. Just liquids for me right now. Oh the joy of getting back to normal, emphasis on getting. Any day now will come the muscle cramps that will bring the searing pain. The temporary blindness. Not to mention the internal issues with food and water. The last and worse one to overcome will be the weight that gravity will be on my newly formed muscles and nerves. Oh what fun, NOT!
Being older now is a bad thing, but a good one as well. I have patience now, and those with patience around me too. It helps with the recovery I don't feel the rush of getting better to go back out, and safe the world once more. Also the healing from Stephen is more effective now that I'm more solid then not. The down side is that I know what is going to happen, and I will recover slower. I am no longer a teenager so I won't be recovering like one. I know about the pain that I will be enduring. There will be no stopping it. I will scream. Scream until my voice is lost and gone, but not the pain. The voice that I have just gotten back will leave me. Sleep which still eludes me will not be there for me to slip into. It is a cruel thing that will happen to me, but it will be one that I can save the guys from. Now that I can leave my tube I will be able to short out the door before the pain gets to bad. Before all the screams start. The muscle spasms are my first indicators. The spine will be the worst one. For each one will feel like all my nerve endings will be set on fire as they work again for the first time in months. Next will be my bones as they harden and solidify once more. Turning vapor into flesh is a bitch. At least I know to prepare for it. Last time was a very hard lesson. I wish to spare both Erik and Stephen from the horror of seeing me twist and endure the pain. There is nothing that either can do to stop it. So I will embrace the spasms, the pain, and the blindness alone. It will be hard, but once it is all over sleep will claim me once more. After waking up it should only a few more weeks, maybe a month until I no longer need to be here.
When that day comes I will miss the guys. I have to move on with my life. There are things I have, want, and must do when I leave here. I have to leave the X-Men for good. Tell them all goodbye for the last time, and go start my own life. Wanting to learn to be on my own once more. Relying on myself and what I can accomplish using just my own wits. Figuring out who I am once more without interference from others. Finally the hardest one of all to move on I must learn to apologize to myself and others. Early on in my days as a X-Men I found out that apologizing was not something that happened much. We always had a the most noble of intentions so all the little, or gray areas of morality were swept under the rug. I learned never to apologize for the wrongs that I, and those around me did. All because of the moral high horse that we all sat upon. What a callous thing that I was taught so early on. So it must me one of the first things that I must do. I have found my strength so I must resolve to use it in the hardest of times. If nothing else my trip through space taught me to figure out what I must do for myself and others. Also what is wrong with the teachings that were meant to be good are just as easily corrupted as everything else.
