AN: This chapter was inspired by Kelly Clarkson's "Dark Side" I am a HUGE fan and when I was looking at a list of songs by her it jumped out at me .I know I'm making Monica's story really dramatic, but It's just fun to write :D I promise that this does affect the story. It is a bit short, because I wrote it all on the spot, having no idea what I was doing. Now I just have to figure out something dramatic for Chandler Who knows what my crazy brain will some up with lol:P Well thanks for reading x
~Emmy
Chapter 8: Dark Side
We all have a dark side.
People who do bad things are evil and get punished. If someone does something good they must be good. We're taught this from an early age. What they don't teach us is that everyone has a dark side. Some people's might be obvious, but most aren't. Everyone has done something bad, no one's perfect. Everyone has a secret, some more dark then other's.
The people who are the most dangerous aren't the one's everyone knows what they did, no, it's the people that seem innocent, that are the most dangerous. It could be your teacher, your friends, or even your own parents.
Everyone tries desperately to hide their dark side, often to protect the people they love. We try to cover up our mistakes, but we can never truly bury them, they always linger, waiting to be found.
In life we all make plans, but sometimes they don't turn out the way we expected. By trying to help out, we may damage a relationship. By attempting to reach out, we may push someone further away.
We all take the gift of life for granted, if only we could slow things down because before you knew it, the gift is gone.
I've done many things in my life that I regret, but there is one that stands out.
I killed my little sister Marie.
I know it sounds bad, but I swear it was a accident. The only person that knows is Ross, no one else knows, not even my parents or my best friend.
It all started on a hot summer afternoon when I was 6, Ross was 7, and my Marie was 4. We were all playing in our tree-house. I loved my little sister to death, I had always wanted a little sister, and now I had one. Not only did we look alike, but we liked all the same things. She looked up to me, and I tried my best to be a good role model.
On that fateful summer afternoon Marie and I were playing Dolls, and Ross was playing with his toy dinosaurs in the corner.
"CRACK"
I froze.
Marie began to cry. I whipped around, and my hand flew to my mouth. Marie had broken Mother's prettiest doll. Mother was going to kill us, but especially me since I was suppose to be responsible for Marie. I ran over to Marie, wanting to comfort her.
"What happened?" I asked in a soft voice.
"I-I dropped it a-and it b-b-broke," she sobbed.
I Sighed and looked at the doll, there was no way the doll could be fixed.
"Why do you always brake everything Marie? Now Mother is going to kill me." I said softly.
Marie just continued to sob. I began to get mad, I always got in trouble for everything she did! It wasn't fair. I was tired of getting in trouble because of her. I rarely got mad at Marie, but I was tired of always being blamed for what she did. I wanted her to get in trouble for once, maybe then she would be more responsible.
"Well, you have to go tell Mother you broke her doll, and accept the consequences."
Marie didn't move, she was still crying.
"N-n-no, Mommy's g-going to be r-really mad!." She sobbed, terrified of what their Mother would say.
I sighed in frustration, and held my arms out, wanting to get a hold of her so we could both go and tell Mother what had happened. I only intended to get a light hold of her dress, to make sure she wouldn't run away. She was out of reach, so I sprang towards her, not wanting to give her any time to run.
I failed to notice the doll still lying on the floor.
I tripped over it, and crashed into her.
She flew backwards, out of the treehouse, her mouth opening in a giant "O"
I heard her hit the thump when she hit the ground and I stood still in shock.
My hand flew to my mouth. What had I done?
Ross looked up from is toys,
"Where is Marie?" he asked, looking around.
Tears sprung to my eyes, a I crept over to the edge of the doorway. Marie was laying in a crumpled heap on the ground, not moving. Her head lay beside a large rock, she must have hit her head on it.
"Ross wandered over,"What' are you looking at Mon?"
He peered over the side, gasping at the sight below.
"W-why isn't she moving? What happened?!"
I burst into tears, sinking to the floor.
"I g-got mad, and when I jumped a-at her t-to grab her, I t-tripped, and fell into h-her, and s-she fell o-out."
"... What are we going to do?!" Ross yelled, panicking.
"Please, please don't tell mom and dad, J-just say she-she-she fell out." I looked up at Ross with pleading eyes.
He sighed, running a hand through his hair, "Fine..."
So we told our parents she fell out of the treehouse, and they never found out the truth. Mom was inconsolable for a while, and then she turned all cold at the mention of Marie, so we never spoke of her. After this, my mother become a lot harder on me, treating me in a way I now consider normal, almost like she knew what I had done.
Marie is one of the main reasons I want children so badly, I feel so guilty about her that I want another child that's like her, but won't replace her. I will have a baby girl, and I will name her Marie, no matter what. I will love the child to death, and I will never let anything happen to her. After all, I owe Marie at least that.
Monica sighed and put her journal away, Ross would be back soon, and she didn't want him trying to read what she had wrote so far in her diary. She hoped that no one would ever read it, maybe she could just forget about her past, create a new life...
