Before we start this chapter I want to say a few things.
First, thank you SO much Yuki2311 for pointing out the Robin thing to me! I was losing my mind the other day because I knew I was writing Matthew for the Avatar' name, but Robin kept come up for some reason :/. So thanks for that!
Second, if you are wanting to know just how long I plan to have this story, then know that I plan to have this story completely finished before Fire Emblem: Fates comes out. Trust me, when that game comes out it will have my FULL attention! Who knows, after I beat the game a billion times I just might make a fanfiction about it ^_^.
Thirdly, thank you guys SO much for the favs, follows, and reviews! I know I say this every chapter, but you have no idea how heartwarming it is to know that people are still reading this story TT_TT. Lets ride this out to the end!
Also thank you allen Vth for constant feedback! Glad you like the material!
Chapter 9 Trust
Matthew pushed open the flap to his tent to escape the hot desert sun; careful not to make too much movement. Slowly he trailed over to his cot and carefully laid down. When his body was securely on the cot he let out a long, loud, grunt. He reached down to the floor to grab his sheets that had fallen off of his-
"ARGH!"
The tactician grunted as his body screamed in pain. It's been two days since he had last spoken to Emmeryn, and he found that Chrom was really serious when he said that he would train with him without a practice sword. Chrom explained to the crowd of soldiers that gathered that it would be important to learn to defend themselves without their weapons. Matthew, unfortunately, was Chrom's guinea pig. After mercilessly being beaten, being laughed at by not only the soldiers and Shepherds but also the sadistic Mad King, Matthew was left bruised and exhausted.
What made everything even more frustrating was after the Exalt literally flattened the tactician he looked out to the crowd of people with a smirk and said, "As you can see, our tactician here clearly demonstrated that it is impossible to fight without your weapon, so make sure you do everything in your power to not get disarmed by your opponent in battle." The crowd replied with either a nod or loud laughter which embarrassed the tactician who laid prone on the ground. Matthew was sure that the Exalt already knew the truth about what happen with him and Emmeryn when Lissa spoke to him, but the dastard was probably using that as an excuse to get back at the tactician for teasing him at his wedding. That dastard made sure to hit him only in places where it wouldn't cause internal or permanent damage. If he wasn't demanding to always be on the from lines then the tactician would use that as an excuse to put him….or he could just threaten to put him in the back…that works too-
"Excuse me?"
The tactician picked his head up to pier toward the front of his tent where the voice came from. The newest blonde haired Shepherd, who joined in Regna Ferox, was standing up-straight at the tent entrance with her purple tome hanging in her left hand and the other on her hip. "Hello...Naomi, right? How can I help you?"
"Nothing, I just came to check on you and see if you were alright. The Exalt really did a number on you after all." The young dark mage replied with a blank expression that did not make her sound very concerned.
"It's alright." The tactician said while laying his head back on his pillow. "He only left bruises. I'm sure they will heal within the week. Hopefully before we reach Plegia in tomorrow."
"I agree." She replied dryly while gesturing at a nearby chair. "Do you mind if I have a word with you?"
The tactician thought about it for a moment. It wouldn't hurt to have some company right now. He thought. Besides, I have to get to know her better to put her in my strategies. "Sure, go ahead." The young dark mage nodded and walked over to the tactician's desk. She pulled the chair from under the table, turned it toward the tactician, then sat down; placing the purple time in her lap. "What is it you wanted to talk about?" the tactician asked.
"I don't want this to be a long conversation, so I'm just gonna be very blunt and right to the point."
"O-kay?" The tactician said quizzically and somewhat prepared for the blondes question.
"What is your current relationship with Lady Emmeryn?"
"Wha-" The tactician shot up from the question, but immediately regretted the action as his body screamed in agony and forced him to slowly lie back down. "...Why are you asking me this all of a sudden?"
"I'm asking because I am curious. I'm not the only who is curious here. Some of the other soldiers are asking the same thing. I'm just the only one who is brave enough to come out and ask. Now, if you would be so kind as to answer my question we can get this over with faster." That last part sounded more like a demand than a plea. Matthew thought.
Matthew closed his eyes and let out light sigh. "We are just friends. Nothing more, nothing less." The tactician turned his head to the young dark mage who wore the same expression as when she first walked in.
"I see." The blonde replied dryly. "Then I have another question. What are your feelings for Emmeryn?" Matthew didn't say anything. He just looked to the ceiling of his tent with a blank stare. He already knew what his true feeling were for the former Exalt, but he definitely couldn't tell anyone about his true feelings. The young lady in front of him was definitely not close enough for the tactician to spill his heart to.
"I don't have any romantic feelings for her. I see her only as a fri-."
"Lies." Naomi accused.
"What-"
"You're lying. Whenever you lie, or about to lie, you look away."
Curse my habits. Matthew thought as he face palmed. "Alright you got me. It's just that…I don't feel comfortable revealing my feelings to someone I barely-" Matthew stopped and slowly slid his hand down his face as something just came to his mind. "Wait." He mumbled then turned to the blonde who looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "How did you know that? The only people who should know that are Gaius, Lissa, and Chrom. I've only known you for 4 days and this is only our second time interacting, so how could you possibly have known that?"
For a second the young dark mage lost her cool composure and her mouth hung agape, but she quickly closed her eyes and put a fist to her mouth to clear her throat. "I-It was just a hunch. I once knew someone like you who use to do the same thing. I just assumed that your gesture was similar to his."
"But that would not have made any since. You would have had to at least wait to know me better before you could come to that assumption." The blondes face contorted into embarrassment and her cheeks turned a bright pink that matched Olivia's hair. The blonde's chagrin and half opened mouth left the tactician completely confused and suspicious.
"I-I'm the one asking the questions here!" Naomi blurted out, completely losing her calm posture and starting to show more of her true age. Seeing the young dark mage flushed face made the tactician laugh in hilarity. "W-What's so funny?!" Naomi asked with gritted teeth and pink cheeks.
"Nothing, I was just thinking that you will fit in perfectly with the Shepherds." After hearings tactician's soothing words the young dark mage's embarrassment slowly died down. There was a short lull between the two before the blonde once again cleared her throat.
"Well, I've asked my question. I may not be satisfied with my answer, but I will take that for now." Naomi quickly stood and strolled toward the exit. Before she departed she turned back to the tactician who stared mindlessly at the roof of the tent. "Don't think for a minute that I won't be back! Next time I want my answers!"
"Yeah yeah, I hear you." Matthew replied nonchalantly.
Naomi nodded then left the tent. Matthew let out a heavy sigh before closing his eyes. He was finally alone and could now drift into sleep.
"Matthew?"
...Never mind.
Matthew peered over his torso to see who had once again interrupted his rest. His eyes quickly widened when he saw Emmeryn standing by his tent entrance. The former Exalt was the last person that he wanted to see. Not because he hated her, but because he didn't want to cause anymore misunderstandings between them.
"H-Hi Matthew..." Emmeryn greeted. Matthew noticed quickly that something was off about the blonde. She continually glanced from him to her fingers that were laced together and held close to her abdomen; her thumbs pushed against each other like she was playing thumb wrestling against herself. And her face contorted to that of a child about to be scolded.
"What's wrong Emm?" Matthew asked, a little concerned about the former Exalt.
Emmeryn continued her nervous pattern and did not look up to the tactician as she said, "Are you...alright?"
Oh, so she was also just checking up on me. Matthew said inwardly. "I'm fine Emm. You don't have to worry about me." Matthew replied softly.
"T-That's good..."
"...I'm more worried about you Emm. Is there something troubling you?"
"..." Emmeryn finally looked up to the tactician whose light brown eyes gazed back at her quizzically. She took a deep breathe then did a low bow. "I-I'm sorry..."
Matthew raised an eyebrow at the former Exalt's weird behavior. "What are you apologizing for, Emm?" Emmeryn slowly rotated upwards to look at the tactician who was now sitting slightly up on his elbows.
"You...hurt...because of...me." Emmeryn grimaced at the thought when she saw the tactician slowly getting abused by her brother.
Matthew slowly motioned his legs off the cot and sat at the edge of his bed while looking at Emmeryn with a sympathetic look. "Emm, it's not your fault. I don't blame you for what happened, okay?" Matthew felt like his words were like small pebbles that didn't even break through the former Exalt's glass barrier.
"It is...my fault...I didn't know...what b-boyfriend...really meant...and...you hurt...because...me." Emmeryn tightened her fingers together as her next sentence stuttered out her mouth. "P-Please...d-don't hate me." Matthew ignored the roaring pain in his legs and stood to walk over to the grieving blonde who found the ground more interesting than the tactician. He stopped in front of her and put a reassuring hand on her shaking shoulders.
"Listen Emm. Don't worry about what happened earlier, okay? I'm far from mad at you and I don't want you feeling sorry for what happened to me. I'm sure Chrom understands what you were trying to say as well, so I can say that he is at least not angry at me. So let's put this behind us, okay?" Emmeryn finally looked up to the tactician who looked back at her with his light brown eyes and a warm smile on his face. Her sorrow seemed to fade almost immediately at the tactician's bright smile and a smile of her slowly curved on her face.
"T-Thank you...for not hating me...Matt."
Matthew's eyes widened at the nickname. The nickname shocked him more than the former Exalt had realized because the one to ever call him that was…. "Emm? D-Did you remember c-calling me that from…your past?"
Emmeryn shook her head. "You call me...nickname, so I...made you one…too." She said innocently which caused the tactician's shoulders to drop in disappointment.
"I-I see…" Matthew grimaced, which caused the blonde to worry.
"D-Do you not…like it?" She asked. Matthew immediately shook off his grim look when he saw the Emmeryn's worried face.
"Of course not, Emm!" Matthew reassured. "I actually like it!"
Emmeryn smiled at the tactician's sudden cheerful attitude. "I'm…glad..." Emmeryn's eyes widened when she realized just how close she was to the tactician's face. Her face turned a light pink that did not go unnoticed by the tactician who quickly caught on. He quickly jumped back and cringed as his muscles protested the sudden movement.
"S-Sorry." Matthew mumbled while looking away from the blonde and scratching the back of his head. Emmeryn turned away from the brunette and gazed back down to the ground with flushed cheeks.
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"...Matt?" Emmeryn murmured while looking up to the tactician.
"Yes Emm?"
"Have you...ever had a...girlfriend?" Matthew looked to the blonde with curiosity as to why she would ask him that. There were no solutions that came to mind so he answered truthfully…well, almost truthfully.
"Honestly Emm, I really don't know. I have amnesia just like you. I wouldn't know if I ever had a girlfriend, or if I was already in a relationship before I lost my memories. But from the time that Chrom found me in that field to now, I can say that I've never had a girlfriend." The tactician turned away from Emmeryn's curious eyes as he continued. "But I did...have a...crush." He stated as his face turned red from embarrassment.
"Crush?" Emmeryn cooed in confusion.
"Yea...crush." There was a short silence before the tactician stumbled out the next sentence. "Y-You were actually...my first c-crush Emm." Matthew glanced to the former Exalt to see what expression she now wore from the tactician's confession. Instead of a flushed face or even a light smile, she looked at him as if he had told her something absolutely terrifying.
"You...crushed me? D-Did I do...something wrong?"
"Wha-NO NO NO! That's not the crush I meant Emm!" Matthew corrected while shaking his hands back and forward in protest.
"T-Then what crush...did you mean?"
"Y-You know. The crush where a guy...well a guy kinda likes...a girl." Matthew whispered the last part almost inaudibly, but was clearly heard by the Exalt.
"Well...if you've...never had a...girlfriend," Emmeryn began to blush furiously as she tried to continue without messing up. "C-C-Can I...b-be your...f-first...g-g-girl-" Emmeryn stopped when she heard the sound of a stream of laugher outside the tent. Emmeryn and Matthew turned their heads toward the exit where the multiple voices echoed. "What's...happening?" Emmeryn asked.
"I don't know." Matthew replied with a frown as he listened closely to the cursing and repeated use of the name "Mad King". "But I think Gangrel might be involved." Matthew ignored the pain and quickly walked with Emmeryn out the tent.
5 minutes earlier
Gangrel slowly treaded back to his tent. He was fairly surprised at how almost all the Shepherds had accepted him so easily, but he could feel the glares of the soldiers on the back of his head all day. Most likely from the people who lost a friend or a family member from the war that he raged. Whatever. Gangrel thought. He was almost to his tent now, but something was strange. He could feel that he was being followed and the 3 soldiers standing in front of his tent didn't make him any more relaxed. One of the three men was like a tower. He was at least 6 inches taller than Gangrel and he wore blue armor similar to the great knight that always followed Chrom; the great knights name never came to the Mad King. Gangrel pointed out that he must be the leader. The other two were Gangrel's height and did not strike his interest. The 3 soldiers were alarmed by the footsteps approaching and looked to where Gangrel was now standing. They walked up to the Mad King until they were a meter away; forming a line that blocked his path.
"Looks like you made it." The taller soldier said with a grin. Gangrel looked up to the taller man.
"And may I ask what I've made it to, sir knight?" Gangrel asked with a hint of irritation in his voice.
"I'm just going to come out and say it since no one else in this camp will." The taller soldier started. "We don't want, or need your help here. I don't know what scheme you pulled to get Exalt Chrom to trust you, but I never will. I'm giving you a fair warning. Leave the Shepherds TONIGHT, or we will personally remove you as a corpse." Gangrel let out a wicked laugh which caused the three soldiers to glare at the laughing fool.
"Wow, that's richer than the oatmeal I had this morning. I am humbled that you would share your graceful opinions of me." Gangrel said sarcastically while taking a short bow. "Now, if you don't mind." Gangrel turned to walk around them, but was stopped by one of the shorter soldiers. Gangrel sighed in frustration. "Look, I'm trying my best to keep my calm. Could you so graciously remove yourselves from my path, or are we gonna have to do this the fun way." Gangrel smirked and put his hand to where his Levin Sword would be, but was surprised to grip nothing but air. He looked down to his waist in confusion as he realized his Levin Sword was missing. Then it hit him. He forgot that he took his sword off when he went to the mess hall. Gangrel cursed silently as the snickering of the soldiers before him echoed in his ear.
"What's the matter?" The taller soldier asked. "Can't do anything without your sword Mad King?" Gangrel gritted his teeth.
"I don't need a sword to slay a dog."
"*Tsk* you forget king. We're not the only enemies you have in this camp." Gangrel looked around to see soldiers stepping from behind tents. Within seconds he was surrounded on all sides. Gangrel looked back to the taller soldier, but was not expecting the low uppercut heading toward him. The punch hit him dead in the abdomen knocking the wind out of him.
Gangrel gasp as the air in his body was forced out of him. Falling to his knees as the fist left his stomach he could hear the laughter from all the gathered soldiers around him. "What's wrong 'Mad King'? Too much for ya." Someone in the crowd yelled.
"You can't go down after just one punch!" another yelled.
"Show us the REAL Mad King!"
Gangrel said nothing as more and more insults rushed to his ears. The words were like daggers stabbing him over and over again as he gripped his stomach.
"Well, this is what I deserve I guess..." he mumbled. Gangrel wanted to forget his past, but he knew that others wouldn't. The things he had done were rushing back to him like a creeping winter on a late Feroxian night. He could say nothing, think nothing, but hear the voices surrounding him.
Then, like a passing storm, the laughter around his slowly began to die down. Eventually coming to a complete stop as the wind blew through the evening sky. Unsure of what just happened, Gangrel lifted his head slowly to see what had caused the noise to cease. His eyes widened as he saw the robes of the former Exalt before him. Her back was turned to him, and her arms extended side to side as if trying to shield him from the rain of words that were once being thrown at him.
"Please...stop..." She said firmly.
"Y-Your Grace. W-What are y-you doing? Y-You should be resting." Said the taller soldier.
"Why...are you hurting...my friend?" The blonde asked with a frown that shook all the soldiers around her.
"B-But Your Grace! You may not remember what happened, but this man is the cause of so many deaths in Ylisse AND his own country! He is also the reason for your amnesia! How can you defend a man like THAT?! He should be put to the sword for his actions here and now!"
Emmeryn dropped her arms to her side and slowly walked to the taller soldier. She stopped right in front of him and looked up to him with fury in her eyes that made the soldier shut his mouth.
"I hold…no grudge...against him…You shouldn't hurt…my friends. If you do...I'll never forgive you!"
"What's going on here?" A voice called out from the crowd. Everyone was speechless to see Chrom and Matthew walk through the crowd behind the crunched over Mad King. Chrom looked down to Gangrel who clenched his stomach, then to the crowd with furrowed brows. "Anyone care to explain?" No one spoke a word. Most of the soldiers looked away from the Exalt, while others just shook their heads. Chrom looked around and saw more soldiers heading toward the small crowd. "Matthew, do you mind helping Gangrel up?" Matthew nodded and went to the Mad King to give him a helping hand.
Matthew looked down to Gangrel who looked back at him. "You alright?" he asked.
"Peachy." Gangrel grumbled. Matthew held out a hand to help Gangrel up, but was quickly brushed aside by the Mad King as he stood to his feet. Gangrel gave the tall soldier a menacing glare that made the soldier grit his teeth before turning and walking through the gap that Matthew and Chrom made in the crowd. The tactician quickly followed after the Mad King.
"I'll see you to the medical tent." Matthew said concerned for the Mad King's state of mind at the moment.
"Don't bother." Gangrel replied sharply as he continued walking forward and out of the crowd. Matthew ignored him and followed anyways. Emmeryn, concerned, quickly followed after the two that left the crowd.
Chrom sighed and looked to the massive group that had gathered. "Alright listen up!" Chrom shouted. "I want everyone to hear me when I say this. There will be absolutely NO in-fighting among this army. In the Shepherds AND in Ylisse everyone will be treated as equals no matter what they have done in the past. I know some of you are still affected by the war that was raged two years ago, but what happened two years ago is in the past. We have fought hard for the peace we have today. If we show the same hate that my father showed, then we are no better than he was! We must follow by Emmeryn's example and free this world of such hate. Right now Valm is threatening our lands. Right now we must all come together to fight off this new threat so that the peace that we've maintained over the past two years can, and will, once again return; Even if we must use past enemies, we must not faultier for Naga is on our side. Do you all understand?!"
The soldiers in the crowd stood straight and saluted. "Sir yes sir!"
"Gangrel...you okay?" Emmeryn asked in concern for the Mad King's wellbeing
Gangrel glared back at the Exalt and the tactician following him.
"Didn't I say not to follow me?" he growled.
"Where are you going Gangrel?" Matthew asked.
"That's none of your concern. Where I go has been, and always be, MY business."
"Are you really going to leave after just one altercation? And here I thought you were made of better steel."
Gangrel stopped walking and turned around to the tactician with a frown.
"Do you really expect me to stay here and become you Ylissean dog's punching bag?"
"No." Said Matthew shaking his head. "I hope that you will forgive the actions of the soldiers that acted unprofessionally. I know it will take some time, but you must put more trust in them."
"Trust? HAHAHAHA!" Gangrel laughed like a mad man. "Have you NOT seen the way your 'soldiers' act around me? Your people look at me like I'm the devil, and YOU want to talk to ME about trust? No thank you. I'd trust a wild wyvern before I trust you Ylissean dogs."
Matthew frowned at the Mad King's remark. "Trust doesn't develop overnight, Gangrel. Like I said before, it takes time. You first must gain it to have it." Gangrel looked to the tactician with gritted teeth and furrowed brows.
"Have you ever thought about if I ever wanted their trust to begin with? I never asked to join this army and I damn sure didn't ask to gain your trust. I'm sure I never asked for forgiveness either, so why don't you run along with your little pack of soldiers and play hero somewhere else while I do my best to continue being a dead man." Gangrel turned to walk away from the two Shepherds behind him. He had nothing else to say and nothing else he wanted to hear.
"Then why did you save Emmeryn?" Gangrel stopped once again from the tacticians words. Gangrel's furrowed brows lifted and he now mirrored the blank stare of the tactician behind him. "If you never asked for forgiveness, then why did you help Emmeryn? Why did you even put forth an effort to save the villagers in SouthTown? I'm sure the old Mad King would never do something like that." Gangrel looked over his shoulder at the brown eyed tactician. The tactician didn't look at him with anger or suspicion. Instead he tilted his head slightly forward with one raised eyebrow. The way he looked at the Mad King was like he was asking him, "Am I right?"
Emmeryn, who had been silent till now, broke away from the tactician's side and walked over to the Mad King. Both Matthew and Gangrel's eyes followed the former Exalt as she stopped directly behind the Mad King.
"Don't leave...Gangrel." said Emmeryn, her eyebrows showing her concern for the Mad King. "It will be sad...if you leave." There was a long silence that really did not give Emmeryn the answer she wanted. Gangrel prepared to walk away but was stopped by a hand that grabbed his. He looked back to the former Exalt who gave him a grim look. "Gangrel...stay...please?" The Mad King did not know why, but looking at the former Exalt's pleading face made him feel somewhat…relieved. So there is someone who actually wants me here. The Mad King thought as he ruffled his hair.
"Fine." Gangrel mumbled which made the former Exalt's eyes go wide. "I'll stay alright! Now unhand me woman!" Gangrel growled as he yanked his hand free from the blonde's grip. He turned around to look at the tactician who looked to him with a blank expression. "Tactician, just letting you know that I will not be joining you on your journey to Plegia's capital. I would rather not show my face in Plegia right now. Instead I will stay back with the rest of the army that will not attend the meeting. Is that okay with you?"
Matthew had no reason to deny the redhead, so he nodded in approval. "Alright. I will report to Chrom of your actions." Gangrel nodded that said and quickly retreated from the two Shepherds.
"Thank you!" Emmeryn yelled after the quick pacing Mad King. Gangrel's mouth curled into a satisfying smile from the former Exalt's words and he pace began to slow down. He replied by lifted his arm up and waving his back hand at the former Exalt.
Matthew looked to Emmeryn who smiled at the back of the Mad King's head. Matthew didn't know how she was still able to smile even when she knew everything the Mad King done to her. It was just in her spirit. Matthew told himself. But no matter how much Emmeryn approved of the Mad King, Matthew could never do the same. He has not once smiled in the Mad King's presence and he was sure the Mad King knew that as well. He would never be friends with the Mad King and he would never want to befriend him.
Because he's the one who took Matthew's greatest joy away from him.
