Hey gyes a ne chappy for you :) this time with a lot of angst be warned ;)


9. On the roof

Owen was alarmed as he heard Ianto storming back into the Hub.

"Tosh, CCTV from the tourist office and the quay! Since Jack left us!", he yelled and hurried to the computers.

Tosh jumped at the harsh tone of Ianto. "What happened? Were is Jack?", she asked as she began to work.

"I don't know, but there was a fight in the office. Everything was destroyed. No one there, when I came in."

"Looks like he and Carys had a fight.", Owen murmured watching the footage.

"But that's not why the office was destroyed, look!", Tosh said.

"Bloody hell what did they want?"

"Carys", Ianto stated.

"Hey what's going on?", they heard Gwen entering the main Hub. She stopped when she saw what was on the screen. "What happened?"

"Carys and Jack were being attacked."

"I can see that, Owen!"

"Then don't ask."

"Hey could you two please shut up!"

They watched Carys getting stabbed in the back and Jack shooting there attacker.

"Shit. Why didn't he bring her to me!", Owen wanted to know. Nobody had an explanation.

They saw Jack running over the plaza to the Millennium Centre.

"He went to the roof", Gwen commented. "Why would he do that?"

"Do you think she is dead?", Tosh asked quietly.

"The way he is carrying her... I can't tell"

"I should go looking for him", Gwen said.

Everyone was looking at her, as if she was mad. "I think Ianto should go", Owen stated. "Carys is his friend after all ."

"Thank you Owen. I'm going." With that Ianto hurried out of the HUB leaving a pouting Gwen behind.


Jack didn't know for how long he had been there on the roof, when he suddenly felt a warm hand on his shoulders. He didn't need to look up to know who it was. He would always recognise this hand no matter when, no matter where.

"She is dead", he whispered. "She died and I couldn't do anything!"

"I know", Ianto said in a calm voice. "We saw the CCTV feed."

"She wanted to die. She told me not to take her to Owen." Jack wasn't crying any more, but he was still hugging Carys' dead body close to his own.

"Jack it's okay.", Ianto tried to comfort him.

"No, nothing is okay! Can't you see it? Everyone around me is dying! And I can't do anything about it. I am alone, all alone!"

"Come on Jack lets go. I'm going to take care for her." Ianto reached his hand towards Jack in order to help him up. Jack looked desperately up to him.

"She deserves the best, Ianto!", he whispered. Ianto's heart broke seeing Jack this devastated, but he needed to be strong for him and Carys. Slowly Jack took Ianto's hand and let him help him up.

They laid Carys flat on her back, she looked as if she was sleeping. Ianto would get her when the sun had set completely. Then they made their way to the exit.

They were nearly there, when they heard a loud gasp for air behind them. Both men froze in their tracks. Jack was the first to turn around and he instantly run back to Carys. Ianto too, turned around and his eyes widened. There on the roof top sat Carys, breathing heavily and Jack was kneeling beside her, eyeing her with an expression of wonder in his handsome face.

Ianto had a sinking feeling in his gut. Not that he wasn't relieved that Carys was alive, but the way Jack was looking at her... he never ever had been looked at this way. He could practically see a bond forming between them as Jack looked at Carys and she looked sheepishly back at him.

Ianto tried his best to look happy, but failed miserably. It didn't matter, they weren't paying attention anyway.

That was it, he thought. Jack would never look at him the same way. The moment he had dreaded had come. Jack was moving on and all he could do was trying to stand upright and not to let show that he was slowly dying inside. Ianto tried to convince himself, that that was the best thing that could happen to Jack. He wouldn't be alone any more. Yes, Jack should be with Carys even if it was killing him.

Slowly he made his way to the pair. No one had said anything, since Carys came back to life. But as she noticed Ianto approaching, she came out of her stupor.

"Hi guys", she said "I know this must look weird to you, but I am really alive. Before you are bombarding me with questions. I..."

"You can't die", Jack interrupted her.

"Well yes, kind of. I mean I die and then I come back."

"Since when? From where are you?"

"I was born in Wales. About 400 years ago. Something happened to me back then...You don't seem too surprised about it.", she commented.

"Well, lets just say you are not the only one.", Jack vaguely said.

"I'm not? Who?" She looked from Jack to Ianto and back, then realization became clear in her eyes. "You!", she exclaimed. "I thought there was something connecting us but I couldn't put my finger on it. Oh my god! I'm not alone!"

She embraced Jack in a bone crushing hug. She inhaled his scent and her whole body began to tingle. She wanted to never let go. Now that she had finally found a man, that would understand her completely.- But then, she was in Cardiff for a mission, she couldn't forget about it. So she reluctantly release Jack.

"Wait a minute!", she heard a voice next to her. She had completely forgotten about Ianto, sweet nice Ianto. She felt a little bit bad about it, but only a little bit.

"You said your life was in danger", he continued. "But since you can't die, what exactly wanted those men?"

Carys looked to the ground. But answered none the less. "I never said my life was in danger. I said it was a matter of life and death. But that was before I even knew those men were here in Cardiff." She drew a deep breath. "They know, they know about me. A few decades ago they captured me and held me as a prisoner for years. Experimenting with me. It was so awful." Ianto glanced to Jack, who sat there with a stony expression. But he knew that inside him a storm was ranting.

"I managed to escape and have been hiding ever since."

"But what are you looking for in Cardiff?"

Carys laughed bitterly. "Peace", she simply stated.

"I don't understand", Ianto was confused, but Jack had understood, he himself had been looking for peace for many years.

"You want to die!", he managed to say. Carys looked up. "Yes"

"But that's impossible?"

"No it's not not. Somewhere here in Cardiff is an object hidden that can kill me. I'm going to find it and I'm going to use it."

"No you can't!", Ianto was devastated. She wanted to die? She had been planning it from the beginning? He had just decided that she would be best for Jack and now she wanted to leave him already? And more importantly, if Carys found, what she was looking for, wouldn't it be able to kill Jack, too? He wasn't so sure whether Jack would do it or not. He couldn't let this happen! Even if he couldn't have Jack, he needed to know that he would live on and on. A world without Jack simply wasn't acceptable, as selfish this might have sounded.

He was not going to help, plain and simple. "Torchwood is not going to help you with a suicide mission. I'm not going to help you, I'm sorry." he said determinedly. Carys looked a little bit surprised and Jack eyed him somewhat grim.

"I'm going to help you, Carys, and Torchwood will too" He said.

"But Jack, you can't!", Ianto felt ice cold and hot at the same time.

"Last time I checked, I was leader of Torchwood, not you! We are going to help her, with or without you!" Carys looked relieved, for a split second she had thought everything was at a loss.

Ianto on the other hand was shocked about the tone Jack had used to speak to him. He hadn't talked to him in this way since the night Lisa had died. Ianto's face froze into the unreadable mask that he had worn in those times.

"If this is an order, I shall be going, sir." His tone monotone.

Still with an expression on his face that showed nothing of his inner horrors, Ianto left the roof.


He didn't go back to the Hub, he kept going until he was in his flat, in which he hadn't been that often lately. He laid face down on his unused bed and began to weep. He wept about the unfairness of the world, about his life once again falling apart without a clue how to stop it.

He lay there crying until he completely exhausted fell to sleep.


A/N: Well he it is Carys' secret hope you enjoyed :)