Alright everyone, I did feel bad for the cliffhanger last chapter, but then again because I felt bad I'm updating in the wee hours of the morning. Because you know, what's sleep? I don't need that stuff, pfft.
Oh and fair warning, this chapter sucks, I'll fix it tomorrow or Thursday. Sorry. Please ignore all the typos and anything else. Once one of my friends (i hope she doesn't mind me calling her that) can apply to be a beta, I'll see if she wouldn't mind betaing for me. Until then your all stuck with my horrible errors. Haha! :)
Oh and there are a few parts where I tried to achieve a chaotic scene, so i hope it worked. Thank you for everyone who has reviewed, favorites or followed. :)
The sounds coming from Remus actually hurt to hear. The raw emotion tortured Snape as he watched the man mourn. He tried to turn away, to ignore him, to pretend like everything was okay, but it wasn't.
And probably never would be.
After a few more moments of watching the heartbroken man sob over his dead child, Severus snapped back into reality and crouched down besides his godson and pulled Draco back to consciousness, trying his best to ignore the sobs erupting beside him.
He wouldn't admit it to anyone, but hearing the choked sobs nearly brought Severus to tears himself. He looked at the blind boy in his arms and shook his head, "Why Draco?" He whispered.
Draco blinked his gray eyes open and immediately looked over to Harry. A small sob of his own riveted in his chest and Draco crawled over and looked at his deceased mate. He was gone. Draco felt eyes watching his every move and turned to look at Remus, who growled threateningly at him and pulled his lips back, showing his canines and pulled Harry closer to him.
Draco didn't know what he expected, but it definitely wasn't for the older man to lunge at him and coarsely and emotionlessly say, "You killed him."
After being pinned to the ground and many shouts coming from Snape, Remus slowly let the boy up and stalked back to Harry. He honestly just felt as if he wasnt even there any more. When his cub left, he left.
"Professor," Draco groaned, picking himself up from the ground, "I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking and I'm-"
"SHH!" Remus growled and leaned in closer to Harry. Could it be?
"I'm trying to apol-"
"SHH!" Remus ground out again and waved his hand, gesturing for Draco to go away. He leaned into Harry's frail chest and let out a shaky breath. He heard Severus clear his throat but Remus ignored them all, all that mattered was him and his child. His cub. His Harry.
He heart the faint, but unmistakable, sound of a faint heartbeat. He looked up to see the searching faces of Snape and Draco decided not to say anything yet. He turned back to Harry and listened intently again. He heard the beat fade more and panicked. He looked up and saw that Draco took a few steps away.
"Come!" Remus snapped, not looking up. Both men took a few steps forward and Remus spared them a look and gestured for Draco to take a step closer. He put his head on Harry's chest and heard the heartbeat thump a little louder, but not loud enough for anyone without strengthened hearing to hear, but it was there.
"Hold his hand." Remus demanded, his head still to Harry's chest. Draco complied and Remus heard the pumping become steady. A small and shallow ache tickled his ear and Remus hugged his cub as tight as he could without hurting him and finally turned to Draco and Snape.
"He's alive. As long as Draco stays near him, he will be fine." Remus said, sounding relieved. (AN: Did you really think I'd kill Harry off? He still has a whole life to live!) As if reading the other men's thoughts he quickly said, "We're not going to St. Mungos. They'll find out about Harry. We're going home. Now."
When they walked into the house it was eerily silent. Draco, cradling Harry in his arms, headed for the couch and sat down carefully. He cringed as he saw Remus and Severus sit across from him a small share a look.
.oO-Oo.
Harry Potter
(Mentally Awake, not Physically)
"Potter, I'm your mate, but you're not mine."
Dizzying circles. Spinning images. Everything blurs together. He can't see anything, it's just a mass of swirls and steaks of blurry color. Dizzying circles. He can't stop. No control. Spinning images.
Suddenly, the spinning stops sharply, as if he ran head first into a brick wall. Stillness. Everything is so clear. He's not wearing glasses. He hasn't been wearing glasses for a while now.
Gray eyes.
Draco holds Harry close. He sighs as Harry asks him to just talk to him. As if he's annoyed. No scratch that.
He is annoyed.
The spinning starts again. But this time it doesn't stop. The swirl of colors blurry into one giant blob. A blob of gray. Gray. Like Draco's eyes.
"Trust me Scar Head, it would be a whole lot easier if you were dead."
The voice chases him as he spins. It is so close to getting him. He can't escape. It echoes around him. The spinning speeds up. He closes his eyes. It stop much. All of this. It's too much.
Much too much.
It won't stop.
He can't escape. He needs to escape. Now. He's running out of time. He looks up and opens his eyes. Everything is still spinning. It doesn't stop, Harry prays for it to stop. For it to all end.
For him to end.
He quickens. Faster, and faster, and faster. Everything goes white. Everything. There's no where to go. And it won't end. There's no ending. He's stuck. He can't get his feet to move. The spinning continues. He can't stop.
Silence. Draco's silky voice stops chasing him. He slows.
Everything stops. Blackness engulfs him. He takes a breath and let's a smile slip onto his face, it's all gone. Everything will be fine now, he tells himself, I'll really wake up now, everything is back to normal.
Silence.
Emptiness.
Nothing happens. Litterly nothing. The silence suddenly grows louder. And louder. And louder.
It buzzes around him loudly in heavy blanket, smothering him. He feels the blanket of silence grow louder and heavier. It's pulling him down, pinning Harry to the ground. He can't move.
The silence roars at him. It's deafening. The blanket starts to crush him. His lungs tighten, his throat closes up, his hands shake, his head pounds.
And this time, he knows he won't get another calm before the storm.
Suddenly the blanket crushes him. His lungs deflate and his throat suctions itself closed. His head feels a pushing pain before he loses feeling entirely.
The deafening silence become louder and it whips around Harry, smacking him and pummeling him farther into the ground.
"NO! I REFUSE TO BE BONDED TO THAT IDOITIC, COWARDLY, STUPID, WORTHLESS, PIECE OF SHIT! POTTER CAN DIE FOR ALL I CARE! WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I WOULD EVER HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH HIM!?"
Everything goes silent.
Nothing moves.
The blanket is lifted from Harry and his lungs and throat work. His head is clear and he can think. He hears it again, louder this time.
"NO! I REFUSE TO BE BONDED TO THAT IDOITIC, COWARDLY, STUPID, WORTHLESS, PIECE OF SHIT! POTTER CAN DIE FOR ALL I CARE! WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I WOULD EVER HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH HIM!?"
The words spit at him. They push him down. He's drowning.
"NO! I REFUSE TO BE BONDED TO THAT IDOITIC, COWARDLY, STUPID, WORTHLESS, PIECE OF SHIT! POTTER CAN DIE FOR ALL I CARE! WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I WOULD EVER HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH HIM!?"
He can't reach the surface. Harry can't breath. He can't stop falling, the words slow him like water. He can't stop. He's drowning.
He can't breath.
Breath.
He needs to breath.
Breath.
The spinning comes back but he's to far gone.
And he can't breath. And he can't live. And he can't function.
His mate hates him.
So he doesn't breath.
Tick
Tock
Tick
Tock
Harry shifted in his sleep and let out a quiet whimper, the slow ticking was aggravating his headache.. 'Stop. Make it all stop. Please.'
Ring Ring
More pain. White, hot, burning pain. It rang in his ears like a grandfather clock, counting down his last moments before death, it echoed and seemed to be pushing him into a corner. Only there was no corner. There was nowhere to go. No where to hide.
Ring Ring
The pain raced through his veins. It spread through every inch of him. It flared in his chest and his labored breathing slowed even more.
Tick
Tock
'No, stop. Please.' Harry thought desperately.
TICK
TOCK
'STOP!'
The ticking and ringing and tocking wouldn't stop. Harry tried to shake his head, but the sounds became louder and high pitched.
RRRIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG RRRIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG
'Stop!'
Suddenly the ticking sped up and sped around him in dizzying circles, all the while echoing and chasing him. Harry searched for someplace to hide, but he was being chased. No matter what direction he turned in the pain and sounds and hurt jumped up infringing him and ran after him, laughing at his misery.
TICK. TOCK.
'No!'
TICKTOCK
TICKTOCKTICKTOCKTICKTOCK.
'THIS HURTS! STOP, PLEASE! STOPSTOPSTOPSTOP!'
RRRIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG
'Just make it stop. Let me die.'
RRRIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG
He had "woke up" right after Remus started sobbing. The sound echoed in his mind, the pain and suffering growing louder with each cry. The sound mixed with the ringing in his ears and Harry felt like his body was being stuffed with flaming pins and needles.
TICK
TOCK
'Please.'
RING. RING.
The hurt had started multiplying with every tear that soaked into his shirt. The soft, barely noticeable wetness soaked into his skin and met the flames with anger. They battled it out, showering his lungs-
TICKTOCKTICK
RING
RING
TOCK
-in sparks and leaving his already burning chest feel like it was turning to dry, stuffy ash. He choked on the dry, dead ashes that were lodged in his throat. They seemed to enjoy scattering throughout his lungs and making him dry heave.
RRRIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG
TICK
TOCK
TOCK
TOCK
And the desperation eating him up with every whimper of his name. Remus muttered his name over and over, in a soft mantra. Each time he spoke Harry felt the ringing fade a bit, as if cotton had been stuffed in his ears. Instead of hearing the deafening clock like sounds he felt a flash of pain and heard his name. It was worse.
ti-
"Harry."
to-
PAIN. Burning embers were shoved down his throat.
tick tock
"Harry."
Flames eating him alive. The embers rolled into his stomach and began eating away.
"Harry."
ringringring
tic-
"Harry please."
The deafening roar of Remus's sorrow was hurting him more than anything else. Harry felt the fire roar within him, and he also felt the burning hot pumping of his blood turn cold. Icy, freezing blood shot from his veins and spilt into the fire, sizzling and spitting out more sparks. Harry felt the-
RRRIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG
-sparks turn to knives and begin stabbing into his and burrowing into his bones, cracking each one of them and painfully scrapping away any bone marrow. The knives dug in deeper and pulled down. Some snuggled in farther to Harry's skin and turned to flame once they were in far enough.
TICK
TOCK
'LET ME DIE!'
RRRIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG
RRRIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG
RRRIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG
"Harry."
TICKTOCKTICKTOCKTICKTOCKTICKTOCKTICKTOCKTICKTOCK
.oO-Oo.
Draco Malfoy (at Potter Manor)
Draco moved Harry so his head was on Draco's lap. He looks at the two adults and nodded, letting them know they can now speak. Remus snapped first and Draco barely contained his flinch.
"How could you?! You knew his life was in your hands! You killed him!"
Draco sighed and ran his hand through Harry's hair, enjoying the small comfort it gave him. After pondering this response for a minute or so, he answered. "I wasn't thinking. It didn't click that he would actually die... until he did." He looked anywhere but the two adults condescending eyes.
"Obviously you weren't thinking! You let him die! You were with him the entire time! Didn't it feel wrong at all, to watch Potter die?" Snape snarled, Draco visibly cringed and his hand began shaking.
"I mean, Fuck Draco!" Severus continued, "Did it not bother you when he went limp in your arms? Did you even feel any regret? He died in your arms and you just didn't care!"
"Sev, I-"
"I raised you better than this Draco! I told you he would die! I told you it would be extremely painful for him! Why?!" Snape barked. He glared at Draco with all the malice he could muster, out of the corner of his eye he saw Lupin still shaking, it definitely wasn't fair to him. And to think, if they would've gotten there earlier, Harry could be fine. Part of it was his fault he realized, feeling guilty. Before he could decide how to bring himself to apologize, Draco spoke.
"He was in pain..?" Draco asked in a small voice.
"No! It felt like landing in a pile of angel feathers. He actually laughed and was happy when he died, Draco." Remus responded sarcastically, sounding a lot like Sirius. "Of course he was in pain you daft idiot! You denied him! His heart was litterly broken! How can you even ask that?!"
Draco looked down at Harry and lifted his limp face gently, "I'm sorry."
Snape laughed condescendingly. "You think sorry is going to help?! You killed him and you can only say sorry?! Imagine if he had actually died, would you walk up to his coffin and pat it, saying sorry you took his life!?"
Draco suddenly gained a bit of confidence and glared back at his godfather, "I didn't mean to! I don't want him dead!"
Severus snarled and glared at Draco, forcing him to look back down. He was about to tell at him again when Remus's voice cut in front of his.
"Will you accept him?" Remus inquired, looking both fearful and aggravated. After more than a moment's hesitation Remus growled and stared at him, awaiting the answer impatiently.
"I don't know."
"What do you mean, you don't know?!" Remus shouted at the same time Severus shouted, "You better know by the time he wakes!"Both Remus and Severus synchronized one another and stood up and stalked towards Draco.
Draco gulped and looked down at his fidgeting hands. "I mean, I don't know. I don't know when I'll know. But I won't let him die. I promise." He whispered.
"No." said Remus, something flashed in his eyes and he took a shaky breath - something the had been doing a lot lately. "Don't make promise you can't keep."
"Lupin?" Snape questioned. He raised an eyebrow and wondered what had caused the sudden change in the man.
"I promised him that I wouldn't let him die." Remus mumbled under his breath. Realization dawned on Draco's face but Snape still looked confused.
"You didn't let him die. I kept you hostage in the kitchen. I'm sorry for that." He said quickly then turned Draco with a new demeanor, "I thought he would appreciate being alone with Potter. I trusted him." Snape stated, putting extra stress on the past tense. Trusted.
Draco looked ashamed and lowered his gaze, "I've apologized and I'll do so again. It won't happen again. I pr-"
He caught Remus's warning look and sighed, "it won't happen again." He repeated, both to get the point across and to let Remus know he wouldn't promise anything else.
"One last question, Draco." Severus said, leaning back in the chair slightly and shooting him a level look. "Can you tell us how it happened?"
Draco nodded, it was the one question he didn't want to answer. He could answer everything else, but this was painful for him. "You sure you don't want to see it in a pensive?" He asked, attempting to regain his calm.
Remus immediately rejected the idea but Severus nodded hesitantly. "Tell us first." Remus demanded, anger coursing through his veins again.
"Well..." Draco started.
He told them how it all started when they left the room. He didn't leave out a detail, even the times when he got annoyed by Harry's dying wishes. He told the story till it's end... Which resulted with an angry werewolf and a steaming Potions master.
"How-?!"
"No! That was the last question! We're done!" Draco snapped defiantly, losing what little patience he had left.
.oO-Oo.
Harry Potter
Harry opened his eyes and saw only darkness and he groaned. 'Why can't it just end already!?' He had been tortured endlessly with silence and spinning. Oh, the spinning was by far the worse, though.
He heard a breath and immediately turned around and became smothered. Panic hit him hard for about a millisecond. He soon realized he was indeed being smothered.
By a couch cushion.
On his own couch. In his manor.
'Am I awake? For real?' He wondered. He maneuvered himself off the couch but tripped over the lump months floor. The lump popped up with a squeal.
The lump had eyes...
The lump was Draco Malfoy.
See, Harry didn't die after all! Aren't you all sooooo happy!? This chapter is not only embarrassingly short, but it's also choppy and rushed. I'll redo it later.
The scene where harry is still trapped in his mind with the 'Tick, Tock, and Ringing' was inspired by the song Circus of Your Mind from Finding Neverland. If you haven't heard of it before you should check it out, it's a cute musical. XD
Please Review! And vote for Harry's Dragon name! Thanks guys!
