Valentines Day

Naruto goes around asking for advice. Me trying to be funny. A random lemon written in under five minutes.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Crackish pairings, yuri.

Temari was having a hard time finding the guy she liked. Sure, they never talked, but still. She had this bizarre, sexual urge to just let him take her whenever she saw him.

She looked for him. She checked his team's training ground. Typical. So she found him, and she said, with all seriousness, "Would you kindly fuck my brains out?"

Neji, being Neji, and having been turned down by Ten-chan, was sad. A good fuck cheers anybody up, doesn't it?

"Err…do I know you?" he said.

"No, but It'd be nice to…know you a little better." She said sensually, putting an emphasis on the word know.

"Well…fate brought you here, so let's get some predetermined action going."

And so they fucked. Roughly. There was no love, just random sex. Anyone could've seen them, but they didn't notice. Oddly, Gaara's 'sister-sense' went off, but he was not concerned.

At the end, they were sweaty, tired, and out of breath.