The Worst Possible Time, Chapter 9
Where We Left: Reunited in the Hamptons without interference from Demming or Gina, Beckett and Castle continue to reconnect and heal.
The sky is a brilliant black over the ocean. On the patio, Castle and Beckett pick over the remains of their meals. The conversation has been easy, comfortable, and surprisingly light. Castle has yet to mention Demming. Beckett wishes he would. She told him they broke up: from where she stands, it's up to him to bring up the subject for more details.
But there's something else – a less charged topic – that has Kate curious. It's something she's wondered about for months, but she never felt it was any of her business. It's still not, but after tonight, the question feels less intrusive.
"So, Castle, why did you and Gina get married?"
Momentary surprise treks across his face before he shrugs. "Honestly? We were both on the rebound, and it was convenient."
"That's it?"
Castle inhales, his shoulders hitching up. "I wish I could say it was some grand love affair, but it wasn't. Not for either of us. We were both coming out of marriages – "
"Gina was married before?"
If Castle's annoyed by the interruption, he doesn't show it. "Yes. To a painter. A painter who makes Meredith look grounded."
"Gina," Kate repeats, because it defies logic.
Castle smiles. "I know, right? They met when she was in Italy the summer after she graduated from grad school. He was an up-and-coming young artist who'd just had a solo show in Rome. They started dating, and what was supposed to be a summer fling ended in marriage a year later."
"What happened?"
"Different goals." He shrugs. "He wasn't as ambitious as her. He talked a lot about art, but there wasn't much doing. It didn't bother Gina at first. After all, she works with writers for a living, and she knows how real and frustrating writer's block can be. She figured it was the same with Stefan. Around the time she was starting to think Stefan liked the idea of being an artist more than the work of being an artist, she found him in bed with one of his models."
"No." Kate, for the life of her, cannot picture someone crossing Gina like that. Gina seems the type to garrote a man for crossing her then calmly wash her hands, change clothes, and go out for cocktails and small talk.
Castle grins. "Oh yes. And to make it better, the model was an assistant at her publishing house. She had posed nude at Parsons and NYU when she was in grad school and needed some extra cash, so Gina recommended her to Stefan."
"I'm surprised you've never used that in a book, Castle. Seems like a good set up for a murder."
"Gina made me promise I wouldn't before she told me the story. Unlike you, she made it clear that was in perpetuity and not just for the next book."
Beckett wrinkles her nose at him but says nothing. For all he solicits her advice about Alexis, it's rare for him to open up like this. She doesn't want to jinx it.
"Gina'd already been thinking about leaving that publishing house – they were one of those stuck-up literary places that make no money but act like they're better than those of us who do make a profit, and she'd realized she prefers commercial fiction – and that settled it for her. A position opened up at Black Pawn, and she became my new editor shortly thereafter."
Castle's wrapped up in the story and doesn't need any prompting. Just like in interrogations when a suspect is in the rhythm and lost in their memories, Kate leans back and waits for him to continue.
"She and I hit it off immediately. I liked John – my first editor – but she brought energy into our partnership. John gave me a lot of freedom, and that was good, but Gina came on the scene around the time my career was really taking off, and she was the right person to have along for the ride." Castle flips the cap from his bottle of water with his thumb and catches it. "Gina's family is old New York society. Not the Astors or Rockefellers but respected. She knows her way around the social scene, and I was in a position financially, even with the divorce from Meredith, to get involved in the charity circuit." He grimaces. "It sounds ridiculous, but the first couple million don't go that far. Especially in New York. But around the time I met Gina, I was looking at my bank account and realizing that I was set for life and that I could do more than just write the occasional check."
For all she knows Castle's wealthy, Kate can't wrap her head around how wealthy. She's never wanted for much financially, but money is a finite resource for her. She's always had a budget. Castle probably has some sort of budget too. It's just such a large amount that it's rarely an issue.
"Gina knows New York society, how to navigate the waters, who's a good contact and who to avoid. It's through Gina that I first met Bob. That was back when mayor was nothing but an item on his ten-year plan. Plus, she's good at those sorts of events. Meredith – " Castle inhales, exhales as he looks for the words. "Meredith likes parties but not those types of parties. She likes being the center of attention, likes a drink and a harmless flirtation, and the few events we went to at the end of our marriage – I hated having her there. Gina, on the other hand, she made it easy."
Castle shakes his head, looks in the direction of the ocean. The water is barely visible in the darkness, other than the occasional white peak of a wave. "It was strictly platonic at first. We were both reeling from our marriages ending because of infidelity – "
"Your marriage to Meredith ended because you cheated on her?" Kate hates the disappointment that grabs her at this revelation.
Castle looks over, his expression wounded. "No. No. I don't – I'm not a saint, but there are some things I don't do. Cheating on a partner is one of them. No, I walked in on Meredith with her director."
Kate's both relieved and guilt stricken. "Wow, Castle, I'm sorry."
"Yeah, it wasn't – our marriage was pretty much over, but I wanted to hold on for Alexis's sake, and Meredith doesn't like doing anything that isn't fun. She hates confrontation. So there was the director and when I didn't instantly break up with her after that – and I should have – she hopped a plane to California and then served me with divorce papers from the other side of the country." Castle rubs his chin. "I make her sound worse than she is. She's not a bad person. It's just that Meredith is all about Meredith. She likes a lot of ideas – marriage, children – but she gets bored. She's not good at day-to-day reality. And Gina, Gina is."
Kate is never going to tell Esposito how accurate he was about Castle's two ex-wives. The other detective will be entirely too cocky at the revelation.
"This probably goes without saying, but Alexis doesn't know that about Meredith, and I'd prefer to keep it that way?" Castle exhales in something that is not quite a sigh. "She's conflicted enough about Meredith without adding adultery to the pile."
"Of course, Castle." Kate meets his eye, her expression serious.
He tilts his head in response. "Thanks."
Kate looks down at the bottle of water in her hand. She mostly has the answers she wanted, and Castle's revealed enough that pushing for more feels unfair somehow, cruel rather than compassionate.
"It's funny, because Gina is practical." Castle raises his eyebrows. "She made me more practical. But our marriage – it only ever looked good on paper. We married the idea of us, and in some ways, it makes even less sense than either of our passion-driven first marriages."
This is the point where Kate needs to talk. After their months working together, she recognizes the uncertainty in his voice as the sign that she should step in with advice or insight. "I don't know, Castle, sometimes you can't predict how things will happen."
He inclines his head in agreement before he continues. "I think what I regret is that we lost our great working relationship. Don't get me wrong, Gina's a great editor and there's no one I trust more with my books, but the ease is gone." Castle hesitates, weighs what he says before he continues. "It's awkward where it never had to be, which, if nothing else, is a lesson in not dating a co-worker."
Ice creeps into Kate's veins. She has to be misunderstanding him. "What do you mean?"
"Just that, sometimes, workplace romances wreck great working relationships." Castle waves a hand vaguely in her direction. "I mean, look at you and Demming. You said you broke up. That's gotta make working future cases together awkward, right?"
"Yeah," Kate says. Her head spins with the subtext in Castle's words. They're finally on the subject of Demming, but it's not the way Kate wanted. "Luckily, we don't work together that often. And just because some workplace romances don't work, that doesn't mean they're all destined for failure."
"No, I suppose not, but you can't know until it fails, and sometimes you just have to ask: is it worth the risk? Is a fleeting romance worth ruining a good thing?"
Kate stares out at the ocean. She can't look at Castle right now. If she does, he'll see her heart break. "No. No, I suppose it's not."
Author's Note: Thanks for the patience and continued support. Extra special thanks to guests who leave reviews since I can't reply individually. Given the quasi-cliffhanger of this chapter, I didn't want to post it until I was back to posting on a regular schedule and could minimize the wait time.
