Sorry its been a while writing this one, hopefully just a chapter or two to go and should finish it soon, hope you enjoy it still

This is taken from one of the most powerful scenes from Rush

Pulling up at the QT bar, not even closing the door, she knows most of it by now, and no doubt Col thinks she is dead at the bottom of the ocean. Making sure her gun is tucked into her pants on her back before heading towards the bar.

Driving away from the marina Lawson hears Leon's voice "Lawson the list is on the screen now" looking at the screen "Leon are you able to log into any of them?" then looking at Stella "go to the QT bar, Josh where are you?"

Seeing Col walk out of the club Kerry walks behind him at a close distance "turn around slowly" seeing him ignore him, pulling her gun out she aims it on him, firing close to him seeing him stop on the spot her gun aimed on him "give me one good reason why I shouldn't blow your brains out now" seeing him look at her fear in his eyes not seeing it focused on one thing, now she has the guy who organised to get her son killed all the hatred boiling over "get down on your knees" seeing him ignore him walking over closer to him, hitting him across the face with her gun. Seeing him on his knees the gun aimed on him trying to remain strong not wanting to think about any consequences just one thing on her mind, ignoring the voices in her head James voice "you're a good cop mum I knew you would get him, don't do this Mum".

Logging on the cameras at the QT bar, accessing the outside his eyes wide open talking to himself first "shit" before into his com "Lawson you need to get to the QT club now" hearing Leon's voice does he really want to know seeing Stella look at him quickly whilst driving "send through what you have Leon" opening up the screen his eyes drawn to it, seeing the gun inches away from his head, Kerry's eyes focused on one thing, looking around, they are still at least 10 minutes away hoping Stella can drive faster he needs to get there ASAP before Kerry did something stupid or worse kill the guy, hearing Stella's voice as if she read her mind "I can't go much fast in this traffic" hearing Leon's voice again "turn off at Brighton, the lights will all be green, you shouldn't get stuck in the traffic" all Lawson can do is nod, who knows what Kerry can do in the time it will take them to get there, and if anyone else gets there quicker "Leon, keep all the GD's away, everyone a silent approach". Looking at Lawson Stella wishes she could drive faster, she had never seen Kerry like this she was always so in control, yeah she bent the rules to suit her slightly, she was tough though glancing at Lawson "you don't think the GD's or anyone would do anything or…" she couldn't say it she didn't even want to think it.

Glancing around not even aware of a small crowd drawing near only focused on one thing and nothing else, turning back to Col she sees him getting up, her face hardened, not even thinking aiming her gun at his leg as she pulls the trigger she watches as he falls to the ground. Walking over to him, grabbing him by the shirt as she pulls him to his knees "get up now", walking slightly before moving in front of him, her gun only inches from his head, can she do it can she really pull the trigger her mind not thinking clearly, she wanted revenge she wanted payback she wanted to kill the guy who got James killed why should he live if James was dead. Pushing him back down on the ground her eyes focused on his, coldness in them her gun only inches from his head.

Arriving at the club hearing the gun shots Lawson sees Stella and Christian looking at him, not even closing the door sprinting down the ramps, stopping as she sees Kerry in front of him with the gun trained on Col's head into his com "Christian if the D's or drug squad come keep them up there" seeing Josh arrive in TR2 turning to him quickly "cordon off the area, Keep everyone up here, the last thing Kerry needs is to see everyone here"

Turning back to Kerry, hoping he can get through to her would she even listen to him, she has now found those responsible for not only killing James but nearly killing Kerry to is he able to get through to her "Kerry" seeing her not even look at him "Kerry … talk to me?"

Looking up hearing a voice "shit, what is Lawson doing here, of all people Lawson, not even looking at him, why did he think she would want to talk to him, she doesn't want to talk to anyone "No Lawson just leave" then glancing up seeing Stella and Josh there, what are they all doing there, do you really want them to see you like this "it's better if you all leave"' wanting to get closer to her but keeping his distance "No, I'm not going to do that Kerry I'm not leaving you don't need to do this" her eyes trained on him, what doesn't he get you never really thought it would end up like this but now it has, you don't want the team to see you like this, but now you don't care about anyone else but what he deserves "don't I … yes I do" not even looking at Lawson wishing he would leave, wishing they would all leave so it was just the two of them, she never thought it would really to come to this, she didn't even think at all, all she wanted is revenge.

Having negotiated so many times before and usually with success he had never been in a situation like this, having to talk his boss down, having the whole team see her like this "Kerry just tell me what's going on you don't want to do this" he is sure of that despite what she had said to him. Wishing Lawson would just shut up and leave did you really think he wouldn't find her, would let her do what she wanted, did he think she would talk to him "yeah I think I do" seeing Kerry ignoring him, he has to get through to her, he can't let her to this, throw her life away, his voice louder "Kerry put the gun down NOW" not even looking at Lawson there is no way she is putting the gun down the scumbag is going to pay for what he had done not even looking at Lawson she knows what she has to do, wishing Lawson would just go away "I have to do this, he deserves this, this bastard took my son away from me" .

Shaking her head trying to focus back on Col her vision starting to blur slightly, looking back up at Col glancing briefly around, seeing Lawson there walking closer to her, hearing his voice "You don't want to throw your life away, you can't have it both ways, you shoot him now Kerry there is no turning back" glancing at Lawson he did have a point you are a good cop and this will ruin my job if it hasn't already, shaking her head, no you will be able to get out of it. Hearing James voice "You're a shit mum but a good cop" taking a deep breath, it will be worth it to get James killer, to get revenge, she will always be a good cop. Looking up briefly at Lawson she sees the worry in his eyes glancing around seeing Stella/Josh even Shannon and Christian are near by, shit why are they all here, seeing you like this, do you actually care though. You don't want to throw your life away, you don't want your team to see you like this, but it is what has to happen, hearing Lawson's voice again, why cant he just shut up, he can be so annoying "Kerry just make the arrest, you don't want to kill him, think about what you're doing….. if you shoot him, he could get off, get away with killing James" her eyes still trained on Col, trying to ignore what Lawson is saying did he have a point shaking her head no it will be worth it, why should he live or get away with it "not if I kill him, he doesn't deserve to live, he KILLED James, don't you get that Lawson" watching Lawson walking closer towards her, turning to face him "don't move any closer" stopping and looking at Kerry he knew her, despite it all when it was all over she would regret it "Kerry look at me…. You don't want to kill him" hearing her interrupting him, was he serious of course she did didn't she "yes I do" trying to get Kerry to watch him, he thought he would be able to reason with her, that she would listen to him, he has to get through to her, he can't let her throw her life awy "No you don't think about what your doing Kerry, if you kill him YOU WILL go to jail, you're a cop and a good one, He is not worth it, is he worth throwing your life away, he isn't just PUT the gun down Kerry, arrest him" trying to remain in control, why can't Lawson just walk away despite it all, she knows the consequences of her shooting him, everything that has happened did she still have a job, feeling herself starting to fall apart why did she have to feel like this, she walks slightly away from Col before walking over to him bringing up her leg kicking him across the face watching him fall to the ground. Seeing Josh and Lawson walk closer, trying to remain strong, moving away from him, her legs collapsing from underneath her, she falls to the ground her hands on the ground before lifting up, the tears falling down her face the guy who killed her son in front of her.

Watching her boss fall to the ground, Stella never thought she would see the day Kerry would fall apart, be out of control, she was also so in control tough not letting things get to here she was in front of her now, walking quickly over to Col putting the cuffs on him, pulling him to the ground, moving him away from Kerry, her eyes wide she felt sorry for her, not imagining what she was going through, she doubts she would ever forget today dam, wiping her eyes walking away she doesn't/can't stare or look at Kerry looking up seeing Shannon walking towards her seeing the shock on her face too nothing said between them.

Glancing at Stella as she hurries over to Col to make the arrest, Lawson picks up Kerry's gun before kneeling down next to her pulling her towards him wrapping his arm around her as sobs fill her body

Watching it all on screen the fact his boss the person so in control, the one who was hard and tough, so out of control not able to help it as a tear falls down his face, wiping it away he watches Lawson put his arm around her.

Feeling Lawson's arms grasp her as the walk crumbles and the tears fall, you don't want too, you want to remain strong, the grief coming to the surface, everything starting to come.

.Feeling Lawson's arms around her, the enormity of what she had or would of done suddenly hitting her, pulling away from Lawson, she doesn't' want his comfort she doesn't want to feel anything, looking up seeing the concerned and worried looks on her teams face, she doesn't want anyone seeing her like this, she is tough and always in control, not able to face them she gets up the need to get away strong, running towards her car, hearing footsteps behind her, shaking her head trying to see where she is going, looking up seeing a face not able to recognise something feels wrong, why can't she run, shaking her head, the dizziness comes, it she feels her legs going from beneath her as she collapses to the ground.

Running over to Kerry looking at her, Lawson into his com "Leon I need an ambulance now"

….

Walking into the hospital the past few weeks catching up with Lawson, the toll of it all physically and emotionally, wanting to protect Kerry from herself but failing seeing her collapsing at the bar and falling to the ground in a heap, falling apart in front of everyone, her hardness had gone for a short period until she quickly regained her composure again.

Walking inside her room seeing police officers outside her room, he never thought the day would come where Inspector Kerry Vincent would be under guard, she broke the rules and flaunted them but this was something totally different. Seeing a nurse walking out of her room "How is she going?" looking at Kerry lying there "Physically she is on the way to recovery the operation went well, and the swelling has started to go down, she has broken ribs and there is swelling, but emotionally I don't think she is going to well, she is a tough person but underneath it all she needs help" smiling at the nurse before walking inside she was a tough person, a hard nut, trying to do everything herself, not seeking help when James died but going after revenge instead. Sitting down next to Kerry holding her hand, watching as her chest goes up and down, tubes still attached to her, her face still bruised wanting to put his arms around her and protect her and comfort her "why didn't you listen to me Kerry, stop being so stubborn, you were so intent on revenge, now look at you know, police guard outside your room too, I don't know how to help you anymore"

Hearing a voice, Lawson looks up seeing Detective Finch standing at the door of the room looking inside "How is she going?" a glare on his face, even though he knows it isn't his fault the need to blame someone other than Kerry there "how do you think Chris, you were so determined to get Kerry did you ever think what she was going through and try to help her?" Walking inside the room he didn't want it to come to this, despite it all, he liked Kerry admired her, ever since he first met her, there was something about her but he had a job to do one he didn't want to do at the moment "I had a job to do Lawson, Kerry crossed a line, and she needs to pay the consequences of her actions" looking at Kerry before looking up at Chris "she lost her son Chris, those bastards killed her son" looking at Kerry lying there before looking back at Lawson "I'm aware of that Lawson, do you think I like doing this, do you think I want to do this to her Lawson" looking up at Chris at the moment he wasn't sure of anything "what's going to happen to her?" looking at Kerry then back at Lawson "not sure yet, but she has a lot to answer for, they are preparing a brief for her now, it doesn't look good Lawson"