"Everyone, this is Dave Karofsky and it took a bit of blackmailing, bribery and trickery, but he is joining Glee club." Santana said proudly as she dragged a blushing Dave by the arm. Mr. Shue looked at the pair surprised.
"Oh. Well. It's nice to have you here, Dave." He smiled warmly at Dave. It was strange, not being glared at. He didn't like it because he wasn't used to it.
"Thanks." He murmured. Mr. Shue turned away from the club and wrote a single word on the whiteboard.
"Secrets." He said. Dave's half-smile was wiped off of his face completely. "We've all got them. But if we're going to be a well-oiled team at nationals, we have to know each other like a family. We recently forced Sam to reveal a secret that he wasn't comfortable telling, and it wasn't very pleasant for either person. We need to be comfortable with each other enough so we can confide in each other." Mr. Shue said.
"But it's healthy to have secrets." Quinn said. "You don't want to put everything about yourself out there. You want people to judge you on what you are now, not what happened."
"Yeah, but… secrets can make you jumpy." Sam muttered. "They make you afraid. You wonder 'do they know? Does everyone know?' It eats you away inside."
"And if the secret is like… something that the school would find out and make fun of you for… you should just tell the people you like the most so they can help you." Brittany mumbled, looking back at Santana. "Or else there's no point in having so many people to help you."
Dave got up, nearly knocking his chair over. Santana stood up next to him. They started walking out.
"Dave!" Kurt called. Dave couldn't help but to stop. Santana kept walking but stopped once she saw that Dave did. "Dave… you don't have to say anything you don't want to—"
"Really?" Dave whipped around. "Because this is my first meeting, and you pull this shit?" He pointed to the board angrily.
"Don't—Mr. Shue didn't know—he's just sometimes conveniently on-point." Kurt frowned. "Please don't leave."
"I… I didn't mean to offend you, Dave."
"It's alright, Mr. Shue. But… I don't think that I can be a part of glee if I have to open myself up."
"Dave." Santana whispered. "Dave you can't leave."
"What?" Dave shouted. "You filthy hypocrite. If you want me to be open about myself, then you be open about yourself."
Santana looked stung and her mouth opened slightly, but she closed it and looked at him intently. "You know as soon as I do, they're going to know." she murmured.
"Santana… is everything alright?" Artie asked.
"I don't think you have the guts." Dave hissed. She squared her shoulders and walked in front of the glee club. She could do this. She had to do this, for Dave. Dave's frown disappeared and was replaced by shock.
"I'm a lesbian." She said, her voice half-shaking. "I… I am. And I love Brittany." Brittany had a small smile on her face as she looked at Santana. "Okay? There. That's my secret." Puck gave her a knowing smile, as did Quinn. Everyone else was shocked into silence.
"We knew you loved Brittany." Rachel said. "But… I guess we didn't expect you to realize it for a long time."
"Yeah well… Holly Holiday can be really helpful." She murmured. Dave looked at Santana, feeling painted into a wall. He wished he hadn't goaded her into outing herself. He felt suddenly alone and exposed. He had no girlfriend to mask his efforts anymore.
"Hey, Dave, did you know your girlfriend was a lesbian?" Puck chuckled.
"Uh…" Dave muttered. If he said yes, that would mean… but if he said no… what… everything was so confusing.
"I've got a secret." Kurt said quickly to mask Dave's brain lapse. They all looked up at him. He walked down the seats. "Go sit back down you two." Brittany had her arms open for Santana, who was wiping her eyes. Dave went to go sit back down in his seat alone.
"When I was at Dalton…" he looked guiltily down at his feet. "I sort of told them all about you guys. About what you were probably going to do at Sectionals, about the types of music that you were going to use… but then I felt bad so I approached Rachel and told you guys about what the Warblers were most likely to do." Kurt shrugged. "I'm sorry about that though. I was kind of desperate for Blaine."
"I've got a secret." Finn said, once Kurt finished and took a seat next to Dave. Dave mouthed 'thank you' to Kurt who nodded. "I still mix up my lefts and my rights." Everyone chuckled. "But I figured out that if you make L's with both of your hands, the one that makes and L is Left."
"You deserve all the awards, Hudson." Dave chuckled. Everyone tittered at his remark.
"I have a secret." Sam said, standing up. "I'm a blackbelt in Karate, and I use that knowledge to come up with cool fighting sequences if I was a jedi."
Dave's eyes widened.
"I've got a secret." Dave said quickly. "I do the same thing."
Sam's eyebrows raised. Everyone turned to look at Dave. It wasn't the biggest secret, but it's something he kept secret about himself and even Santana because Santana already thought he was the biggest nerd.
"You're a black belt?" Same asked.
"Well… no… I only got up to brown before I quit to play hockey. But I would pretend that I was Luke Skywalker all the time, and I would get a big stick and pretend that every time I messed up and it hit me, I'd lose a limb or something."
"Dave, you are a huge nerd!" Santana cackled. The rest of the club laughed also, but Sam's eyes were alight with happiness.
"No way? I'd be Han Solo, though. He gets Leia in the end, right? And I dunno, he's badass."
"Well I mean, yeah, but I always would pretend that I was best friends with Han Solo. Sure he gets Leia, whatever, but being friends with Han Solo—" Kurt nudged him in the ribs. Dave flushed before regaining himself. "Besides. I killed like, every Sith lord when I was Luke."
"Can we get another secret please? Let these two nerds geek out on their own time?" Quinn rolled her eyes. Sam grinned at Dave and sat down in his seat. Dave flushed he almost gave himself away on a rant about Han Solo.
"I have a secret." Mike said, walking to the front of the room. He licked his lips nervously and looked at Tina for strength. "I've eaten dog before."
Mercedes burst out laughing. "Way to play into the Asian stereotype, Mike."
"It was when I was little! When I still lived in Hong Kong."
"You lived in Hong Kong?" Kurt said.
"Yeah, until I was 10. We moved here because my Dad finally got the paperwork settled. And it's totally legal to eat dog in China."
"You lived in another country?" Puck said. "And your parents chose Lima, Ohio as the place they wanted to live most?" "Well… we tried living in Philadelphia, but it was too expensive, so we moved here when I was 13." Mike shrugged. "Besides. If I hadn't moved here, I wouldn't have met Tina."
Tina smiled brightly.
"I've got a secret." Puck said softly. His shoulders were hunched as he looked at the group. He stood up in front of everyone and sighed. "I still go visit Beth. Every month or so. I check up on her, make sure that Ms. Corceran has enough money for food and diapers and stuff. That's why I stole the ATM. Because… because Beth needed a surgery, and she needed more money because the insurance was a little crazy, and they needed a similar blood type… I don't know. But I didn't want to bother Quinn about it, because every time I bring it up with her, she gets all cold."
"Is she okay? She's fine, right?" Quinn said, nervously.
"She's fine now. Ms. Corceran won't let me see her anymore since I went to Juvie. She thinks that the way I'm acting would be a bad influence on her."
"Can… Is she…" Quinn's jaw was trembling. "What does she look like?"
"Ms. Corceran would be cool if you went and saw her."
"No." Quinn shook her head seriously. "No, I can't. Just tell me, Noah."
"Blonde hair, green eyes. She's walking everywhere. She's shy and she likes books. She's almost saying sentences now. Her first word was "Sing'. It made Ms. Corceran happy."
Quinn pursed her lips as she looked sadly down at her lap. She didn't say anything else.
"Well, that was my secret." Puck muttered. "Now you know."
The club sat in silence. Dave didn't know that about Puck. He was genuine and caring, and he wasn't afraid to show that. Dave wondered what he was thinking all the time. He used to be such a jackass to everyone just a couple years ago, but now… he seemed caring and thoughtful. Maybe still a little bit of a jackass, but the kind that everyone liked.
"I have a secret." Rachel murmured. She stood up in front of the club, nervously picking at her fingernails. "I tried to commit suicide when I was in freshman year. At the end of it, actually." There was a silence in the glee club that was so thick it was tangible. They all waited on Rachel to continue. "I mean, it was more for the theatricality than it was for the actual depression I was feeling… I had no friends, and no one wanted to be my friend. All I had was my voice and my dads. They told me it was enough but… I didn't feel like it. I thought that the great, unappreciated artists all killed themselves before their work was popular, and I felt like I needed a better reason than Quinn Fabray's degrading remarks." She swallowed. "So I tried to drown myself. In a lake. I waded there until my arms and legs got tired and just… tried to sink. Some guys saw me go under and they saved me. " Rachel nodded sadly. "I felt as though I had died anyway, and that life had new meaning after that. I saw the point in life. It was horrible, but I did anyway."
"Rachel…" Finn whispered. He looked like he wanted nothing more than to get up and comfort her.
"I say this because of you, Dave." Rachel looked right into his eyes, and he felt suddenly under a spotlight. "I don't want you to lose yourself. I want you to know that no matter what's going on, that there will always be people for you, no matter what."
Dave couldn't say anything. Rachel, of all people, was encouraging him?
"We're here for you, man. If someone died, if you're being abused… we're here for you, okay? We got your back." Artie said. "Well, basically, we got your back because Kurt and Santana got your back."
Dave couldn't say anything, he just nodded numbly.
Kurt put a gentle hand on his shoulder, and every single nerve that was under Kurt's soft touch sparked to life with heat and excitement. Dave closed his eyes.
"I don't know… what you're talking about." He said thickly. Not believably at all. "But I appreciate it, Rachel, really. I'm sorry for what you went through. No one should have to endure that sort of degrading." Dave pursed his lips. "And I'm not being abused, so you can get that out of your heads."
Rachel nodded.
"Well…" Mr. Shue said. "We should all come up with a song that speaks about the most inner parts our ourselves, a song that reveals crippling secrets." The bell rang. "I'll see you all tomorrow, alright?"
Santana looked at Dave and smiled widely. She was shaking, probably from the adreniline that had pumped into her body when she came out.
"How was that?" He asked.
"It was…" She let out a shaky breath with a huge smile. "Freeing. I feel so much better about everything. I'm still scared that the school will find out and my parents and everything… but I know that they can keep a secret."
"What are you going to sing?" Dave asked. "I think the more important question is what you're going to sing, Mr. David Karofsky." Santana poked him in the chest. She looked around quickly and started humming 'I'm coming out' under her breath. Dave laughed and nudge her. He stopped dead when he caught Azimio's eyes, caught between confusion and disgust.
"Heard you joined that faggot club." He sniffed. "This bitch got you by the balls, does she?" Santana was about to say something when Dave stepped forward.
"One? Don't ever call Santana a bitch. Got that? And two? Don't use that word."
"What word?" Azimio raised his eyebrows, amused. "Faggot? Are you kidding me? You used it more than I did!"
"Well I'm not going to use it anymore, alright?"
"What is she teaching you?" Azimio frowned. "And you have avoided the question at hand."
"Yes, I joined glee." Dave tried to beat back his blush with anger. "Because I'm sick and tired of having to bully people because they're different. I like the people in glee. And they… well… they're starting to like me…"
"Dave, what is going on man?" Azimio's voice lowered, his eyes lost all hostility and now only harbored concern. "You've been different lately."
"It's nothing, Az." Dave murmured. Sometimes this Azimio showed himself when they were alone. Someone who truly cared for Dave. Dave still didn't know how he would react if he told Azimio everything. Would he keep it a secret or push Dave away with disgust? Dave couldn't handle rejection.
"Come on, teddy." Santana muttered. Azimio caught Dave's elbow.
"Man, you can tell me anything, alright? Don't let this girl turn you from me. We've been friends since we were 8. Doesn't that mean anything?"
Dave opened his mouth and then closed it hastily, following Santana out of the school.
