Well it's been a bit, but that was my fault. I got inspiration to work on my oldest continuing story at the same time I was finishing this and working on a new story. Sadly that forced me to kind of implode with too many open projects. I went from writing several things to not being able to touch a since one for almost two weeks. Now that this story is wrapping up and the new story first chapter is ready to post... well I think I should be able to go back to work on my old AU soon. I don't give up easy and that can be a good thing. There are a lot of notes at the end so I'll let you get into the whole reason you are here! Enjoy and don't forget to tell me about it!
Epilogue- The Ultimate Healing Power
Was it all just a terrible dream? How could that pain have been a part of my life?
It was like a nightmare where I was so consumed by my uncontrollable powers that it nearly destroyed me and everything I love. Now, it is an old injury, a pale faded scar to remind me of the pain I survived. A road map of my life not on my skin, but forever etched in my mind and heart. I am stronger then even I knew, and there isn't a bit of shame asking for help. That was the hardest lesson for me to learn, but Van was there when I needed him the most. I was drowning, and he was my life raft, pulling me to safety when I had become too tired from treading water just to stay afloat.
I will alwaysot be grateful for how things turned out. I am so very blessed. The tiny, faint scars on my shoulder aren't my only blessing. It's been six years since I was visited by ghosts who showed me the dangers of my past mistakes and the errors I continued to make. Taking my destiny into my own hands saved more than just my life;it saved my soul.
I had been too long in the dark surrounded only by pain, fear, and guilt. I had to stumble again before I was truly steady on my feet.
Standing just outside the open door to Van's study, I now watch with a light heart and a wistful smile. His hair has grown long and he pulls it back into a low ponytail, as I knew he would. The added weight tames some of the wildness, but it is still thick and soft when I run my fingers through it. I am also glad he has remained clean shaven, which was always my preference. Who wants to kiss a facial broom?
As a trained warrior, he must know how long I've been here, but he still tries to work diligently despite the surrounding chaos. Hovering at his right elbow is our son. Folken's hair is fair like mine, but everything else is very much like his father at that age. He watches Van write like it is the most exciting thing in the world, and he wouldn't want to miss a second of the action. His hero. At the age of five, we have yet to tell him many of the stories that will prove his belief right, but there is still time.
The ensuing disaster happens to be the two small girls circling the desk like a giggling tornado. Their obsidian hair slips from bouncing pigtails. Each time they pass Folken, their tiny fingers poke at his side or pull at his shirt, both antagonizing their older brother and trying to get him to join in with their fun. The more annoyed he becomes, the harder they giggle.
Finally, he has had enough, turning his wide mahogany eyes at me pleadingly. "Momma! Make Yuri and Varie stop!"
"Girls." It's all I have to say for the three year old twins to stop. Those innocent green eyes fix on me. Van is the one wrapped around their little fingers, but the effect is not completely lost on me despite how I stern remain.
"We just wanted him to play." Varie, the more outgoing of the pair, chirps happily in her high, singsong voice.-
Yuri nods in agreement, her small hand twining fingers with her sister instinctually. Then, as one, their pretty faces turn to the side, as if listing to music no one else can hear. I know what they sense, because I feel it too.
"Auntie Merle-" Yuri spoke softly.
"Has returned with presents!" Varie finishes happily.
All three children look at me for confirmation. I can't help but smile. "She has, and I know there is something fun for each of you. Why don't you go find out?"
I know many titled parents leave the raising of their small children to nannies, nursemaids, and tutors. Van and I have never been like that. We enjoy watching them learn and grow personally. Normally, I try to keep the whirlwind of little Fanels out from under foot, but sometimes I let them play in Van's study for short periods of time. He always seems to enjoy it as much, if not more, than they do.
On the other hand, it's no crime to have an extra set of eyes on the mischief makers. The patient maid trails them now on their mission to find the indulgent aunt who just arrived home. I smile to her, giving the silent signal that I will stay here a bit longer.
The room suddenly feels silent and empty without the troublemakers. Still, I need a word alone with my husband, the one who has continued to work diligently. Giving into temptation, I trail a single finger around the simple crimson tattoo wrapping around his left bicep. The other arm still carries the blue diamonds that mark him as a warrior king of Fanelia, the same mark his ancestors wore with pride. It's one that our Folken may also choose, but we hope that he will never have the need for it as Van does.
True to his title, Van moves with deadly, precise ability. Startling a gasp from me, he pulls me into his lap easily, as if moving a full grown person were a simple matter. I aim a playful punch, but he catches my hand, turning it over and placing a soft kiss on my wrist.
How he makes every thought escape my normally quick thinking mind is truly a gift and a curse. He draws my arm out so he can land another kiss, this time of my own bare bicep with the red band that mirrors his. My second tattoo had to wait for obvious reasons, but he never pressured me into getting it, the symbol of being forever bound to my soulmate.
"Do you ever think about having another?" Van's voice is low and intimate, as is the warm look in his deep eyes.
It takes a moment to find my own voice. Despite the years we have shared, his effect is as strong as ever. I pray it will always stay this way between us. "Why? You barely get any work done as is." The playful note I use brings out the lopsided grin I love so much. "I like my sanity, thank you."
"I've always wanted a big family." The honestly between us is as common and easy as breathing. He continues, though this isn't our first conversation on this matter. "I love how full of life everything is."
"That's just code talk for noisy." I tease, trying to play calm and coy even while sitting in his lap. Being alone, the situation can quickly change into something more if we let it.
"Another would be nice." He adds wistfully I just want to kiss him but resist. I'm not done playing this game quite yet.
"Only if you are the one giving birth to him this time," I blurt out without censoring my words. I know instantly from his radiant smile, which basks me in its warm glow, that I've let too much slip. It's the reason I wanted a quiet moment alone with him. Just as with Folken, I knew almost instantly, so it appears that this will be another boy. The twins were more of a surprise.
Something about that pregnancy was different, and it took nearly two months for me to be sure of the children growing inside me. It could have been the way that the power seems to react differently with girls, or they could have been shielding themselves from me from the very beginning.
Van's thrilled by my news, even if it wasn't the most tactful way to tell him. This will be the last one. I know. Nothing will go wrong with this pregnancy, but four children are more than I ever thought I'd have. There was a time when my power controlled and distorted everything. It got to the point where I would have let myself be consumed by flames before I faced another person. To think that it still grew after that point is unimaginable, but I survived and have gotten so much stronger than I ever thought I would.
I feel the pull now, and I let myself follow the cord of power. The wind blows relentlessly, turning the rain sharp and brutal. The sodden ground, too full to hold any more water, weeps mud, and flooding grows out of control. The power of the storm sinks houses and carries away livestock.
My vision clears and I am once again dry and warm in Van's arms. I can still feel the rain on my skin like an afterimage, there but not.
"What is it?" His smooth tenor rumbles in my ear, and I lean into his comforting form.
"A bad storm will hit," I answer simply, trying to hold onto the details.
"How long?" Despite our remaining physical closeness, I know the king is busy thinking of the logistics. It's his job, after all. Those houses and animals I saw destroyed could mean lives that we can now save. Fanelia has always been first in Van's mind, but we have similar goals in that now. I am proud to be a secret guardian of this land and these people. There have always been rumors of my abilities, but we have been smart to keep the truth hidden.
"Two, possibly three days." He nods to my words, already reaching for parchment. Reluctantly, I stand and let him get down to business.
"I'll send the messages out at once." The quill moves swiftly, elegantly even as he details a coming threat. This warning, though simple, can save lives and livelihoods.
I linger by the side of his desk, pulling at the threads of memory and vision. "Have someone check the irrigation system to the west. The flooding will be far worse there."
Van makes a note of it quickly, and I know deep down this information will be put to good use. He doesn't look up, but I can feel his attention on me regardless. "What would I do without you?"
It's a rhetorical question, of course, but I still have to exercise my sass every now and then. "Lose some livestock and crops, but otherwise get a lot more done."
His surprised laugh is enough to make me smile in return. "Work is overrated." He adds wholeheartedly. I couldn't love this man more.
As it turns out, it was the children who saved my life. I was never meant to hold the kind of power I had. It's true that my abilities were partly genetic, but each time the pillar of light had touched me, it had infused more of its immense power into me. I started out life like everyone else, just with a little extra.
My grandmother, who had been a seemingly normal girl, was transported to Gaia and back several times. That contact left bits of power in her. She developed an equal amount of precognitive ability and emotional empathy. Grandmother used both the pendant and her tarot cards to control and understand her own powers. She mastered the ability to use them without being used herself.
When my mother was born, some of that power transferred to her, although she never knew or felt it as strongly as the rest of us. When I came along, I got everything that was left from my grandmother. My mother remained a slight empath; she always felt a stronger connection than most people. That was why she knew how I was doing even when swept away to Gaia.
My powers were always kind of there; it just seemed as if I was slightly luckier with predictions than others. Also, I had a kind of charisma that drew people to me and helped me to share my natural enthusiasm with them. Then one day, the day before my life would change forever, those latent powers manifested more strongly than I could have ever expected. As my life turned into a battlefield, the high running emotions and the multiple trips within the pillar left more and more power growing inside of me.
It's true that most of those trips Van was by my side, but for some reason, the abilities always manifest stronger in women. By adding his unique heritage to that, you could say his Draconian blood protected him. Not entirely mind you; being able to douse for enemies without a map or pendant is a rare ability.
So each time I came in contact with the light, it forced a little more into the already tightly packed form that made up who I am. The more it added, the harder it was to control. Straining at the seams, the power controlled me, and the inability to hold everything inside comfortably turned into anxiety, fear, and depression. It was the power all along.
People say that having children changes your life for better or worse. It's true; nothing will ever be the same again. There were so many sleepless nights and constant worries, but I wouldn't change a thing. You'd think that creating a royal line would be what mattered to Van. Instead, it was my health and happiness that actually took precedence. If I would have been unhappy or in any danger, then the Fanel line would have ended with Van. He was prepared for that, and I never knew until it was almost too late.
You'd think that from the bits of future I saw that the children would be all that mattered and be so very wrong. Unconditional love in any form creates a family.
As luck would have it, creating a life is a very involved matter. Just like with me, and my mother before me, bits of power passed to the infant. That tightly packed form started to be a little less cramped. In little doses the power isn't crippling, so I don't have to fear my children will face the same kind of issues that plagued me. It also seems to have effected each in a slightly different manner.
Folken Vargus de Fanel, despite being a boy, inherited some of my empathic ability. He can read people's emotions, and it helps him to tell the quality of people he surrounds himself with. He is also rather difficult to lie to, and for a future king, that skill will come in handy.
The girls, on the other hand, have gotten the precognitive powers that turned out to be both a blessing and a curse for me. Despite identical looks, nothing is the same from one twin to the other. Yuri Yukari de Fanel is more reserved than her sister and has the skill of full immersive visions; she mainly sees future events. Varie Merle de Fanel is the most outgoing and energetic of my children. She has a talent for memories and is also the strongest at finding people or things in the present day.
The son I carry now will be a medium, unlike his siblings who have almost no connection with those that have passed. It is a heavy burden, but he will handle it well. The powers are just a small part of who they are, and I will always be here to help and guide them. They will never struggle alone. Van and I will always be by their sides.
Even after giving away pieces of my powers, I still have more than enough of my own abilities to maintain those skills. Just now, I was not overcome with something I couldn't handle. If things had been different, I would have never left after the war. I wouldn't have grown so out of control and in need of intervention.
I would also never know how truly blessed I am.
Speaking of blessed, with the children chattering around Merle and Van busily, I have a rare minute to myself. I head to one of my favorite spots. It's neither the roof that my husband likes, nor the cemetery where we go together. This is a new place of my own design, right out in the center of everything. At the top of the wide stairs that lead from the main city to the palace, there has always been a wide courtyard used for events, training, and entertainment. Now placed in a prominent position of honor is a large monument. Simple in its construction, the slab of white marble has beautiful veins of blue, black, and silver. Names are etched deeply into the stone; names of each and every Fanelian lost in the attack and earlier war.
It's the solution to our ghost problem. The shades no longer wander lost and trapped, fragments of their former selves unable to move on. This monument gives them what they wanted: to be remembered.
Van supported my desire to commemorate those of his people who paid the highest price. Even without his help, I would have found a way to complete this project. It was something deep and meaningful to me.
Getting some of the names took work on my part. Sadly, records were virtually nonexistent, and some had no living relations to track down. In those cases, I had to go right to the source, the shadow of that person. It took time and loads of energy. In the end, each memory and every name was worth it.
Now my fingers trace the carved names that I, and my children, will always carry. Folken Fanel. Naria, also known as Naru Naru. Her sister, Eriya, or Belu Belu. Vargus Ganesha. Even the first man lost in the terrible attack, the one who showed me what these lost souls needed the most, the farmer's son, Lowen Norcross.
There are dreamers and there are realists in the world. You'd think that the dreamers would find the dreamers, and the realists would find the realists. More often than not, the opposite is true. You see, the dreamers need the realists to keep them from soaring too close to the sun. And the realists? Well, without the dreamers, they might never get off the ground.
Van has grounded me in reality, and I have given him wings. Together, we soar through life and will continue to do so for a very long time.
The End
Okay so the guard helped again. The shades are at peace now and their sacrifice will always be remembered. He wasn't named or based of off anyone really, just the poor guy who thought he saw something strange at the gates in episode 2. The name was a random Celtic name I liked and the last name is from a friend of mine. Norcross it means the people who dwell North of the Crossroads… or that's what she said. It fit since his family in my story at least his north of the main city between it and Arzas. Speaking of name choices. I know to most English speakers Van's sword master and mentor was Balgus. I watch the Japanese and English almost equally (Don't get me started on the new dub it doesn't count.) I chose to call him Vargus in this story as Folken Vargus sounded better as a full name for their first child. So this also means I have to call him Vargus in my new story too… well I may have screwed myself on that one, but I stick to my decision. Also with the naming Yuri Yukari sounded alright but the double Yu names bothered me slightly. As far as Varie Merle it may not flow but I stand by my choice to honor those two with the most outgoing busy child.
Though we never get to meet him in this story thier last child will be named Goau Allen de Fanel. It didn't seem like there was a good place in the story to mention his name, as right now he is just a sea-monkey. Who knows we might revisit this timeline in another story.
Speaking of other stories I am happy to say I have a new one ready to post. It is acutaly a prequel to this story and revolves around Van's struggles with his own darkness that are mentioned in here. Some of the characters we meet here will show up there. It takes place one year after the series and five years before this story. It will still be fine as a standalone, but for you it should have more little things that tie in. As an author I like little details after all.
Thank you everyone who has stuck with me to this fluffy conclusion. zephakitara, Minicilio, Pinkydynimite, and two very special shout-outs. Meghanna Starsong that has to put up with my crazy, and willingly edits my even more insane writing. Lulu, you may not have an account so I can't message you, but you made my day multiple times. Weeks after the other reviews had stopped showing up I started getting more notifications. Someone by the name of Lulu was binge reading my story, and leaving reviews for every chapter. Short simple reviews that made me smile and showed that one chapter after the next was being devoured by a new reader. Thank you it has meant so much to me. Thank you all! The bonus story is for you!
Last thing I promise! This is not counted as completed yet for a very specific reason. Well in a way it's not. I have a bonus story being edited right now! I wanted to post them to together as a little gift to you, but it was too long. You should have it by tomorrow night. It takes place only two months after Van and Hitiomi are married. It's a fun little story that ties up a few little lose ends.
I can't wait to hear what you think about this chapter, as well as the side story.
Please Review.
