Author's Note: Holy crap this chapter is horrible. HORRIBLE, I say. I'm ashamed to post this. But since I'm lazy and this best fits the vision I had when I outlined the fic, it stays. Also, I need to finish this because I have to start on the birthday story for the EVIL person who I wrote THIS story for. Many, many thanks to all who have read, reviewed, inquired after, and made favorite the story. You all keep me writing. Well, besides the evil person this story was for. Leaving it unfinished would have been detrimental to my health ;p Only one more chapter to go. :D XOXO

|| Part Nine: Forgive ||

It was a bright and sunny day when they buried Kelly Taylor. Brandon hadn't been to many funerals, but he automatically associated them with dark and gloominess. And while a sunny day wasn't that far fetched in California – in the middle of summer no less – it seemed odd.

This whole thing was surreal to him.

As much as he hated Kelly of late, and wished he'd never allowed her back into his life, he'd never thought he'd be standing at her grave.

The looks on his sister and Dylan's faces told him the same thing. He couldn't see Brenda's eyes behind her dark shades, but he knew she was beating herself up for every dirty thought she had about Kelly. Wishing she could take back some of the awful things she'd said. He didn't have to see her eyes to know how sorry she was for Erin and Jackie. He knew automatically because he felt the same way.

He could imagine Dylan felt similarly. Dylan who'd loved Kelly once upon a time in the same way he had. Dylan who paid for more than one stint of Kelly, who wanted, like so many others for her to overcome her addictions and lead a happy life.

Donna and David, Steve and Janet, Claire... they loved Kelly. Brandon couldn't imagine how this was affecting them. Mel, Nat and others, people he hadn't seen in years looked pained now.

Erin and Jackie, who loved Kelly most of all, now stood together holding on to each other for strength.

It didn't seem right for it to be a sunny day.

"Before we begin the internment," the priest began solemnly. "Kelly's best friend Donna would like to say a few words."

Brandon wondered why anyone had to speak at funerals at all. What could there possibly be to say? How could any stand there an listen as someone gave a few minute words about the life of a person and then watch that person lowered into the cold, hard ground? How were there words of comfort at a funeral?

Out the corner of his eyes he noticed the short brunette who had come to stand beside his sister. Her dark shades took up most of her face, but Brandon could see the sorrow there. It was etched in the frown her mouth was turned down into. It was in the way she clasped his sister's hand tightly. It was in the way she lowered her head just seconds after returning his gaze.

Donna walked slowly to where the priest stood at the head of the casket. It seemed to Brandon that it took all of her strength to let go of her husband's hand. She didn't dare to wipe away the tears that fell from her red eyes.

"I've known Kelly since we were little," Donna began with a wistful smile. "She was always spunky and feisty. I remember one time in elementary school when I was being picked on and she pushed the boy who was twice our size down in the dirt and told him to leave me alone." Her smile fell slightly. "When she loved you... she loved you. She didn't make any excuses for it and she made sure you knew it."

Everyone fell quiet, thinking on their own memories of Kelly Taylor.

"She made some bad choices in her life, ones that ultimately took her from us, but I'll always remember that little girl who stood up for me. No matter what bad memories we may have of Kelly, we should let the good ones shine through and be an example of who she really was. I also just wanted to thank," she bit back the sob and paused to compose herself. "to thank all of you, on behalf of Jackie and Erin, who have come here today. I know that, " She looked down at the casket forlornly. "that many of you might have felt like you didn't know Kelly anymore. That," She raised her eyes and looked directly at Andrea. "That she might have caused you pain, but being here, now, means that all is forgiven. That all fences have been mended. The Kelly I know would have wanted it that way." She smiled bitterly. "We'll miss you, Kelly." She bent down to place the rose she'd been holding on the casket before walking to hug and kiss Jackie and Erin.

One by one, the rest of the people gathered did the same. Placing their red roses on the casket and offering condolences to the grieving mother and sister. Brandon was one of the last people to do so. It didn't seem right. Not like this. He placed the rose down and went to pay his respects.

"I'm sorry, Jackie," he whispered to her when he leaned in for a hug.

"Brandon?" She held on to his wrist and whispered to Erin that she needed to speak with him alone. He stopped and looked at her with concern. "I just wanted to say that I'm sorry. I know that Kelly has caused you the most pain. You almost lost your job and..." She obviously knew about Andrea. Instinctively, he raised his eyes to search her out and found her walking with Brenda back to her car. "I just wanted to say sorry."

"There's nothing to be sorry for, Jackie." He told her sincerely. "That wasn't your daughter."

Having been a drug addict herself, Jackie knew what he meant. "No, it wasn't." She smiled at him gratefully and kissed his cheek. They walked hand in hand to her waiting limousine with Erin already inside.

Most of the cars had pulled away by the time Brandon reached his. He was sure his sister and Dylan had gone back to the Jackie's house for the repast. He wasn't so sure he could go. This day had already been too much. He opened the door and got inside, but when he went to start the car, he saw Andrea in his rear-view mirror leaning on the door of hers a few yards back.

Unable to do anything else, he left his car and went to her.

"Hey," he said gently. He stood beside her and leaned up against her car as well. "Weird day, huh?" He immediately winced at how insensitive it came out.

Nodding, she took off her sunglasses. "The worst." She looked over at him. "I got your message as soon as I got back to New York. I wasn't sure if I should come or not given what happened the last time I saw Kelly."

"What made you change your mind?" he asked curiously.

"Jackie called and told me how sorry she was for what happened between me and Kelly. Said that Kelly had made some wrong choices in her life but that deep down, she was still the girl I knew long ago. I had to come and pay my respects after that."

They both stood their in silence. Kelly had hurt Jackie most of all. Her mother was nearly bankrupt now thanks to either Kelly stealing her money to score drugs or Jackie paying for rehab. Still... it seemed only right to come after Jackie asked. She'd lost her daughter and still extended a proverbial olive branch to them.

"I'm so sorry, Brandon. I know Kelly was a big part of your life," Andrea said quietly.

Brandon sighed. "She was." He looked out to her casket being lowered in the distance. "I loved her very much once upon a time." He looked at her. "She was a good friend to you once upon a time as well."

"Yeah," she replied dejectedly. "Oh, God, Brandon, I feel so awful. I said some awful things to her." He reached out and hugged her. "I hated her, Brandon. I hit her because of what she said and did."

"Shh, it's okay," he ran a hand down her back soothingly. "I felt the same way you did, but at the end of the day, we all made our choices and did the best we could." He pulled back to stare into her eyes. "We just have to find some way to move on from here."

Andrea nodded. "Easier said than done," she replied softly, wiping the tears that streamed down her face. "Are you going to the repast?"

"I wasn't," he admitted. "Are you?"

"I don't know," she answered honestly. "I don't know if I can."

"Do you want to go somewhere and talk?"

Andrea stared into his eyes for a long while. It seemed surreal to her that they were at this point in their lives right now. Seemed almost impossible.

"Sure, but after we leave the repast. I think we should stop by Jackie's," she said after a minute. "We've got to start making the right choices now, don't we?"

Nodding, Brandon agreed. "You want me to drive you?" He saw her hesitate. "I guess you can't leave your car here, though."

"I'll have one of the rental guys come and pick it up."

Brandon gave her a small smile and held out a hand to her. In accepting it, Andrea accepted their past and all the memories that came with it – the good and the bad. Accepting it meant she was willing to make the choice to move forward.

Hand in hand, they walked to his car.