I am sorry this took so long to finish; I've been working on a different fic called No Curtain Call and didn't have time to write this. This fic is going on a semi hiatus, as are the other ones I'm writing because I need to focus on my school work. I'll still be writing, but I won't be updating a lot. I am also going to Rome next week, so I won't be on tumblr either. If you want status updates, you can find me at baristablainers on tumblr. Hope you enjoy this chapter, I certainly enjoyed writing the last part.
Chapter 9: Confrontations.
"I can't tell anyone, Blaine. The bullying will either only get worse or be completely ignored." Kurt was standing on the staircase, the faint redness around his eyes the only indication he'd been crying in the first place. Blaine admired his strength. He wouldn't have been able to cope with this the way Kurt had. He sat down on the steps and urged Kurt to do the same. The brown haired boy sat down beside him on the cold, concrete stairs.
"Telling a teacher seems to be the only way to help this situation. I have no other ideas." Blaine loathed himself for not knowing of any way to help Kurt. 'He could come to Dalton,' His mind supplied, but Blaine bit his tongue to keep himself from saying the thought out loud. Even if Kurt was bullied at this school, he still seemed comfortable here. He had his friends and family close, was on the cheerleading team and in their glee club.
"I don't blame you for not having an idea what to do. Stuff like this doesn't happen every day." Blaine winced at the tone of Kurt's voice. It sounded way too casual, 'stuff' being said like something normal, like he hadn't been assaulted by his biggest bully. The slight bitter edge around the words kept Blaine from commenting.
"Just know that you're not alone in this, ok? I'm only a phone call away when you need me," he spoke as he put a reassuring hand on Kurt's shoulder. "I know what it's like to be bullied and I took the easy way out going to a school like Dalton." Kurt gave him a wane smile.
"You know, the worst part is that if I'd try to tell someone, they'd never believe me." Kurt looked away and let his eyes fall on the concrete steps. "They'd probably turn it around. The flaming fairy assaulting the football jock with unwanted affection."
"You shouldn't call yourself that," Blaine said and Kurt snorted.
"Why not? Am I not enforcing the stereotype with every piece of clothing I buy and wear? Every song I sing? You know, I tried to act like the stereotypical redneck straight man once, because I wanted to catch my dad's attention." Kurt paused and looked up from the ground, his eyes boring right into Blaine's. "It didn't work out at all. Butch and manly is not something I can pull off, apparently," he finished sadly.
"My dad tried to straighten me up by building cars with me over the summer," Blaine spoke, as if he were talking about the weather. "He even introduced me to the daughters of his friends and associates as a potential boyfriend. He never acknowledged the fact that I will never be romantically interested in them."
He hoped that the message was clear. I'm here. I know what it feels like. You can trust me.
Blaine had never confronted his own bullies after what happened at the Sadie Hawkins dance, him being beat up so much he'd had to go to the hospital and stay there for 2 weeks. He still had nightmares sometimes; the phantom pains of the beating showing up and making him wince and break out in a sweat, fear gripping at him and making his heart beat a mile a minute.
When Blaine had arrived at McKinley half an hour ago, he'd found Kurt outside, his face red with tears and frustration. He keenly remembered how he'd felt after the dance. He hadn't only been hurt, he'd been humiliated. He guessed Kurt felt the same.
"I never had that with my dad… he never tried changing me, he accepted me. Did I tell you my coming out story?" Kurt looked at him pleadingly and Blaine shook his head, accepting the change of subject and distraction. "I joined the football team to please him-"
"You were on the football team? What position did you play?" Blaine asked enthusiastically. 'Kurt was on the football team. He was on the freaking football team, can he be more perfect?' "Sorry, kind of a football fan."
"It's ok. I was the kicker of the Mckinley high titans for all of a week, but it isn't really relevant to the story. I came out to him and he already knew. Didn't blame me for anything or tried to ignore it. He just said he'd always known. Thinking back on it, I was kind of obvious."
"I'm sorry for interrupting, kind of a football enthusiast…" Blaine said, noticing Kurt's face losing it's redness and the tear tracks slowly drying. His eyes were still the same red, but he looked more composed now. More like the person Blaine had first seen perform, a person at comfort with themself. He'd hated seeing Kurt like this, the strong image cracking right before his eyes. "You do know you just contradicted yourself right? You joined the football team, that's almost as not stereotypically gay as it gets. I am also very happy that your dad accepts you. You deserve a loving father."
"I- thank you for being here Blaine. I don't know what I would have done if you weren't here."
"Back when I wasn't at Dalton, I always wanted someone who understood. I know how this can feel." Blaine put his hand on Kurt's shoulder, his voice resolute."I want to speak to Karofsky. Maybe we can talk some sense into him. Things aren't going to change if we don't try and if that doesn't work out you could tell your coach if it gets too much to handle. I don't think she's big on bullies and she keeps order."
"I-" Kurt paused, "We'll try. But I won't go to Coach Sylvester with this. She'll either take it in stride and blame me for being weak, or blow this out of proportion and use it against the wrong people. People who have nothing to do with this."
Blaine nodded in reluctant agreement. He didn't know what that cheerleading coach was capable of, but it seemed like she was not someone to be messed with. He didn't know if she'd hurt the people around Kurt before and judging by Kurt's reluctance, she probably had.
"So when are we going to confront him?" Blaine asked, the nerves jittering in his body. Kurt stared in front of him for a little bit, seemingly trying to determine a good time for a thing like this. He'd paled considerably and made Blaine think of a man walking to his death.
"Tomorrow. I want this to be over as soon as possible," Kurt said.
Blaine gave him a reassuring smile, hoping to sooth some of Kurt's fears. Blaine knew how to defend himself, if push came to shove and Karofsky decided to turn violent.
"Tomorrow it is then."
Kurt wondered how this had escalated so fast.
Blaine was pushed up against the side of the staircase, his arms up in a defensive position as Karofsky snarled in his face. Blaine had been very collected and started talking to Karofsky with an air of normalcy and calm. The jock had almost flown at him but Blaine didn't seem all too bothered. Kurt was sure he'd seen a flicker of doubt in his eyes, but it had been squashed down. Now he just looked up into Karofsky's face without fear, side eyeing the raised fist that Karofsky was shaking dangerously close to his face.
Kurt himself was almost having a heart attack. Karofsky was physically assaulting a student from another school, because of a comment about not being the only one and that there were people who understood, that they understood what he was going through.
Karofksy seemed to have taken his words in stride and turned right back to his uncultured Neanderthal behavior.
Kurt, with a surge of sudden bravery and anger, pulled Karofsky off of Blaine, yelling at him and screaming in rage and fear. Karofsky crowded him and hissed the words that made Kurt's blood run completely cold.
"Tell anyone and I'll kill you."
I'll kill you. I'll kill you. I'll kill you. The words seemed to echo inside of his mind, mulling over and over. He was trying t
Karofsky would kill him if he told.
The bully had actually threatened him with death. He remembered some of Santana's words.
Names and rumors and other shit like that can hurt you, but if someone physically threatens you, have no mercy.
It was the final straw and Santana had been right. Enough was enough. The icy fear in his veins melted as quickly as it had frozen, his blood now pumping with rage and resolve. He wouldn't be pushed around by this pitiful excuse for a human being. Not anymore.
"And how do you plan to do that huh? You don't think that someone will notice? You don't think that even your buddies will spit you out if you do something like this? That you won't end up in jail, if my dad doesn't get to you first with his shotgun?" Kurt's voice was barely raised but he saw the expression on Karofsky's face change from frantic rage to fear. "I've had enough of your behavior. Hell, I'll even spell it out for you. Hit me, go right ahead. If you dare lay a finger on Blaine, or me the entire school will know by tomorrow. I had some sympathy for you, you know?"
Kurt was pushing right back now, the adrenaline pumping through his veins and his eyes daring Karofsky to do anything. This had been the final push. He was backing Karofsky in a corner and he almost faltered when he saw the look on the jock's face. It was the same expression as he'd worn for the last 3 years. Thinking about who had put that expression there only fueled the fire racing through his body.
"I don't believe in outing people and I understand the hardships better than anyone else in this shithole of a school, but you are making it harder and harder for me not to throw you to the fucking wolves. Want to know why? Because you are the kind of person who doesn't deserve my attention or compassion. Taking out your frustrations on innocent people who could genuinely understand you and help you, makes you the worst kind of scum on this earth. Now Back. The fuck. Off."
Karofsky gave him one last half-hearted glare before stalking off, none of the rage he'd had before noticeable on his pale, drawn face. Kurt's chest was heaving with exertion, the adrenaline starting to wear off. He stiffened when he noticed Blaine staring at him, mouth open in surprise.
The silence around them was tense, only Kurt's labored breathing was audible. He swallowed heavily and looked at Blaine. He'd never snapped like this before to anyone. He almost felt like laughing at the sheer madness of the situation he was in. He'd just scared Karofsky away. Karofsky, a jock who was not only a head taller, but someone that could easily squash someone of Kurt's size, just by sitting on them.
"Wow. I…was not expecting that." Blaine said finally, still looking at Kurt incredulously. Kurt could feel his cheeks flare with heat at the Warbler's scrutiny and looked away. "It surprised me. In a good way. I- wow."
"Sorry-" Blaine waved away his apology. "I've never been that pissed at someone before. I have been threatened, of course… but this time. This time Karofsky meant every word and I can't put myself through that. Living in fear I mean." Kurt was surprised and ashamed of his own actions but Blaine seemed to take it in stride.
"You had the courage to do something I've only ever dreamed of doing, Kurt," Blaine spoke, his voice filled with awe. "I never confronted the people that brought me down every single day. I think it's amazing that you actually managed to scare him away."
"Thank you. You don't know how much it means to me that you approve." Kurt tensed. "I mean, as f-friends!" he flushed again, sitting down on the steps of the staircase and Blaine sat down next to him.
He didn't notice the pained and resigned expression on the Warbler's face, too concerned about his almost slip up.
"This was a lesson at least," Blaine joked. "Never get on Kurt Hummel's bad side."
"Yeah, I guess." Kurt smiled but cast down his eyes sadly. "It's just- It was my first kiss you know? Or at least, the first that counted." He glanced at Blaine and wondered what if would've been like if he'd met him earlier. Would Blaine have been his first kiss? Would they be together?
"I guess it doesn't really count. He forced his lips on yours. It wasn't a kiss because you didn't return it. You didn't want it, so it's not really your first kiss, is it?"
"I-no. You're right. You're completely right but it'll always be there. It may be years before I get my 'first' kiss, so I'll be constantly reminded of it along the way." Kurt smiled at Blaine, the sadness very clear on his face.
Blaine was having an inner debate. One side of him wanted to say screw it and kiss the memory right out of Kurt's mind, another side wanted to take Kurt out for lunch or for coffee and just forget all about the debacle in the first place.
He was weighting the pros and cons, the first option looking very tempting. Was it what Kurt would want though? Blaine didn't want to force him into another kiss right after someone else did, even if Kurt's lips looked amazingly soft and inviting. There were a few seconds of silence and Kurt seemed to waiting for some kind of reaction from him.
Did he want to take the easy way out? Forget this all happened and continue his ploy to be friends with Kurt, ignoring the way his stomach clenched when Kurt smiled at him or the way he'd feel his face heating up if they were touching in any place?
'Decide now, Blaine, you have to decide. Are you kissing him or not?' There was still that little voice, whispering at the back of his mind, telling him that this wasn't what Kurt needed, that Blaine wasn't worthy of Kurt's attention and that he would just be a burden.
Kurt seemed far away now, gazing in front of him with a wistful smile on his face. Daydreaming, probably, of what could be.
"Kurt?" Blaine spoke softly. Kurt's face turned to him and Blaine wondered if he would ever see something as beautiful. Kurt's eyes were far away but seemed brighter than before. He was slumped slightly, different from how he usually sat. Relaxed, almost.
"Yes?"
Blaine opened his mouth to speak but closed it again, unable to form words.
"Never mind." He swore Kurt looked disappointed when he spoke and Blaine instantly regretted not saying anything. Could Kurt like him back? Could he really like someone like Blaine? Someone who acted confident but was really just…scared?
Blaine's eyes shifted back to Kurt's lips and he was sure Kurt saw. The hitch in the teen's breath was a pretty clear indicator.
Later, he wouldn't remember leaning forward and putting his hand on Kurt's cheek. He wouldn't remember hesitating a split second before touching his lips to Kurt's. He wouldn't remember anything but his own erratic heartbeat or the way Kurt nipped at his bottom lip.
'He's kissing me. Blaine's kissing me-,'
His thoughts were interrupted when Blaine leaned forward a bit more, his hand shifting from Kurt's cheek to his neck. Blaine's hand was warm and it sent a pleasant shiver down Kurt's spine. The kiss seemed to deepen even more and Kurt let out an embarrassing sound when he felt Blaine's tongue ghosting over his upper lip. This was unknown territory for him and Kurt felt the tell tale thrill of excitement stirring low in his stomach.
He shifted a little, the angle was making his neck hurt. Their lips disconnected and Kurt took a moment to breathe, his eyes wide and awestruck. 'This is how it's supposed to feel,' he thought giddily. 'This is what a first kiss is supposed to be like.'
"I-I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-" The Warbler's eyes were down struck as he stuttered. His face was a bright shade of red and he seemed to be scrambling for words. He dropped his hands from Kurt's face.
"Blaine?"
Blaine quieted and looked back up at Kurt, his breathing slightly harsher than normal. Kurt was pretty sure he was even more flushed than Blaine was right now, even if his breathing was relatively even. He felt out of breath anyways.
"…yes?"
Kurt turned so he was properly sitting towards Blaine, his designer jeans chafing on the concrete. He couldn't bring himself to care.
"Don't apologize again ok?"
Blaine nodded his head and this time they simultaneously leaned in, teeth and mouths colliding almost painfully and once again Kurt couldn't bring himself to care. All he cared about right now was the way Blaine smelled, what he tasted like and how he was completely lost in it.
HOPE YOU LIKED IT, R&R like always
xoxo
Thebarista
