AN: Thank you to all of you who review, favorite, and alert. It means so much to me to know that you all love this story. An especial thanks to theevilsmurf88 for names for Artie.

Disclaimer: I don't own glee or the song.

Chapter 9

Moaning I roll over and switch off my alarm that was blaring telling me it was time to get up and get ready for school. I really don't want to go. After spending all weekend hidden away the idea of poking my head out let alone dealing with everybody scares me. But I know that I have no choice. I need to go to school because I have a test and I know that if I don't show up Rachel will come looking. So I either deal with things now or when she finds me and drags me out. 'Damn after only one day that girl has me thinking about her in reference to me. It's sad that I know how she would react if I didn't show up. It's even sadder that I actually care. I suppose it's because I know I need someone in my life that cares. I don't know if Rachel truly will be that person for me but I might as well try and see what happens.

Quickly I jump into the shower and start my routine. Everything was going smoothly, I mean taking a shower is mindless, that is until it came time for shaving. 'I can use a razor without cutting. I don't need to stop shaving to prevent myself from cutting. I just have to be careful to not cut myself while shaving.' Taking a deep breath I reach for my razor and slowly and carefully get to work. I finished with no mishaps and jumped out of the shower and continued with my morning routine. I still really didn't care about my appearance so I just threw on some jeans and another comfy shirt, some light make-up and set out for school.

When I pulled up in my spot at school I really did not want to leave the comfort and safety of my car. After Friday I know all the sheep are going to be gossiping and may have the courage to speak to me and I really don't want to deal with that. I just want to go to my classes, take my test, sing my song, and then leave to go back to the comfort and loneliness of my house. Sighing I grab my stuff; I might as well face this now and get to my classroom. It will only get worse the longer I delay.'

I was just going to drop off some of my books, but my plans changed as soon as I saw what was waiting for me by my locker. There leaning against my locker with her eyes closed was the one person I really had no interest in seeing. Quickly before the tall blonde opened her beautiful blue eyes I turned on my heel and just headed to my class. I will put up with all these books if it means I don't have to talk to her yet.

The classroom was empty when I got there, so I just pulled out my ipod and turned it on to a random shuffle. I staid there listening to my music with my head on the desk waiting for class to start until I felt a poke on my shoulder. Lifting my head I saw the one person I actually was somewhat glad to see. Rachel was standing there clutching her binder to her chest and looking down at me with what had to be care in her big doe eyes. Taking my ear buds out, to indicate I would listen if she started to talk; I looked up at her expectantly. "Hey San. How are you doing today?"

"I'm here. Can I do something for you?" I really don't want to be mean to Rachel but I also just want to be left alone right now.

Rachel just continued to look at me with understanding in her eyes and said, "Just seeing how you are doing. Also, I was wondering how you were doing on the song for glee?"

"You were right that song was perfect, but right now I want to be left alone." With that I put my ear buds back in a faced towards the front of the room. Out of the corner of my eye I see Rachel take the empty seat next to me. That seat is usually vacant but I guess Rachel wants it to be able to keep an eye on me. Soon after Rachel took her seat the teacher came in and started class. I made myself promise to pay attention to class today to make up for Friday. But still all throughout class I kept feeling Rachel's eyes flitting to me.

When class was over I was hurriedly packing up my stuff so I could get to calc and finish preparing for the test I had in there. Rachel, though, was faster at packing up, and when I was done I looked up and saw her standing over me again. "Can I help you Rachel?"

"I was just wondering if you would mind if I walked you to your next class."

"And why do you want to do that?"

"Because I want to spend some time with you so you know that I'm not going anywhere."

I really didn't have time to argue with Rachel about her walking with me and frankly I wasn't put off by the idea. "You know what; I really don't care if you want to walk by me. Just remain quiet I'm going over formulas in my head to prepare for my test."

With that we walked towards my calc class in silence. The crowds in the hallways parted for me like they always do, but this time there was even more ogling and gossiping then there was this morning. I realized quickly this was the first time the school saw mea and Rachel together and being civil. Maybe I should have thought of the consequences of walking with Rachel beforehand. 'Oh well it's already been done and I just really couldn't give a damn.'

When we reached my class Rachel looked up at me and said, "Good luck on your test. I hope you do well. I will see you at lunch." And with that she left without even waiting for my response. Shaking my head I wondered in to my class and finished getting ready for my test.

The calc test was pretty easy. Math has always been fairly easy for me. I continued on to English determined not to let my mind wander this time around. I was determined to be the best student possible, at least until I could control where my mind wondered off to. With this plan in motion English just flew by. Much too soon it was time for lunch.

I was not going to go to the cafeteria. That is where Brittney and Sit and Spin are and I really don't want to see them. For a while I wondered where I would go. Then I remembered the quiet and calm that I had experienced in the auditorium on Friday and I wanted that again. I quickly headed there just yearning for the peace that I knew I was about to acquire. As soon as I entered the empty room I immediately felt peace and calm that was emanating from the place. I took the seat I was in on Friday and just reclined, closing my eyes, and letting the peace enter me.

I was startled out of my calm state with a tap on my shoulder. Looking up I saw Rachel. 'I swear whenever I look around I see her. She always seems to be watching me. "Gezz Rachel scare me why don't you. What are you doing here? I thought you would be with the other gleeks eating in the cafeteria."

"Well I told you I was spending lunch with you."

"Ok. How did you find me?"

"I saw you in here on Friday and I figured you would be here again." Sitting down she reached into her bag. "I would have been here sooner but I had to wait to get this." With that she pulled out a to go box from Breadstix and handed it to me. I just looked at her gob smacked.

"How did you get this? They don't deliver."

"I know but once I mentioned your name they were more than willing to do it. They are quite scared of you Santana. I also made sure they put extra breadsticks in there. Now eat, it doesn't look like you have eaten in a while." With that Rachel pulled out her own lunch, and there we sat, in silence, eating our lunches till the bell rang. Truthfully I was really glad that Rachel brought me food because I had lost my appetite and hadn't eaten since Thursday, but with this food right in front of me and smelling so good I couldn't help but eat it all.

When lunch ended we got up and she walked me to my next class. "I'll see you in glee." After saying that she turned and left once again not waiting for any response. Psychology passed by in a flash and before I knew it, it was time for glee and time for me to sing.

Yet again I was the first person to glee because I had nowhere and no one to dilly dally with. Rachel was the next person to enter and instead of sitting in her usual seat up front she took the seat right next to me. "Santana after glee I require your presence at my house. I need your help with something, and I will not accept no for an answer."

"What could you possible need my help for?"

"You'll see when we get to my house." Knowing better than to argue with her I just nod my head to let her know I was coming over.

Soon all the rest of the glee kids entered and took their seats. When Brittney entered she quickly looked for me, but when she saw that there were no seats open by me her face fell and she went to go sit by Wheels. I suppose my avoiding her was hurting her but I needed to take care of myself before I helped her. It still hurt though. Rachel quickly placed her hand on my shoulder to try and give me some comfort. Then in walked Schue.

"Ok everybody who is ready to preform today?" Everybody just sat there looking at everyone else. "Really no one? Rachel?"

"I'm sorry I still need a little bit of time, but I think Santana is ready."

"Santana are you ready?" Schue asked.

Sending a glare Rachel's way I nod my head.

"Alright then come on up and sing."

Standing I grab a stool and place it in front of everybody and then walked over to give Brad the sheet music for my song selection. Then I took my seat on the stool, fixing my eyes on Brittney I nodded my head and let the piano start.

Hands touch eyes meet

Sudden silence sudden heat

Hearts leap in a giddy whirl

He could be that boy

But I'm not that girl

Don't dream too far

Don't lose sight of

Who you are

Don't remember that rush of joy

He could be that boy

I'm not that girl

Every so often we long to steal

To the land of what might have been

But that doesn't soften the ache we feel

When reality sets back in

Blithe smile, lithe limb

She who's winsome

She wins him

Gold hair with a gentle curl

That's the girl he chose

And heaven knows

I'm not that girl

Don't wish

Don't start

Wishing only wounds the heart

I wasn't born for the rose and the pearl

There's a girl I know

He loves her so

I'm not that girl

After the song finished there were tears in both mine and Brittney's eyes. Everyone else, besides Rachel, looked confused.

"That's a great song Santana," Mr. Schue said, "can you tell us why you chose it?"

"No I won't." With that I grabbed my things and raced out of glee with Rachel hot on my heels.

AN: Thanks for reading. The song is I'm not that girl from the musical Wicked song by Idina Menzel. Please feel free to send me love in the form of reviews they mean so much to me.