Chapter Nine: Of Defense and Definitions
After Christmas there was a whole new drama to deal with.
"How was your holiday?" Gretchen asked when we moved back in. I made the mistake of mentioning that Michael had joined my family for Christmas dinner, and her face immediately fell.
"Wow. I guess I hadn't realized how tight you guys are. Am I going to get a wedding announcement soon?" She was joking, but her expression told me she was hurt.
"Michael doesn't have any family," I said. "He was going to spend Christmas here on campus. How could I not invite him?"
"No, you're right. I'm just your roommate; it's not like our friendship is as important. I get that."
"Gretchen, please. Of course you're important to me," I pled. "But Michael is, too."
"Have you screwed him?"
I was flabbergasted. When I did get my voice back, though, I was indignant. "Excuse me, but that's none of your business."
She turned her back towards me. "Guess that answers my question."
"No, I haven't!"
Gretchen looked back at me. "Whatever. I'm going to buy my books." I needed to buy mine too, but somehow I didn't think she wanted my company just then.
I groaned and sat down on my bed. I didn't want Gretchen to be mad at me, but it wasn't like I was going to stop talking to Michael just to make her feel better.
My phone beeped as I got a text message. Speak of the devil.
All moved in?
Yeah. Do you want to hang out? Gretchen's not talking to me.
Sure. I'll be outside in a minute.
I tucked my phone into my pocket and walked down to sidewalk under my window. Sure enough, he was already standing next to the bench, waiting for me.
"Is everything okay?" he asked as I hugged him. He took my hand and we sat down.
"She's upset because I took you home to meet my family," I sighed. "She's jealous."
"I'm sorry," he said honestly. "Would it make you feel better if we backed off for a little while?" I was touched that he was willing to change his behavior to improve my relationship with Gretchen. But would it make things better?
"No." I shook my head decisively. "I'm really happy right now, and if she can't be happy for me, lying about it isn't going to help. Honesty's probably the best policy on this one."
He grinned at that. "Are you saying that honesty isn't always the best policy?"
I smiled, trying to keep things light and not entirely succeeding. "No."
But safety first. And sometimes honesty is just plain dangerous.
"What classes do you have this semester?" I asked to change the subject.
"Um, another design class, an anatomy course, psychology, and sociology. Those last two are just intro courses, though."
It made me laugh. "You really are exploratory. Do you have any idea what you want to do with your degree?"
"Sure I do. But I'm taking classes that interest me." He stretches and his joints pop audibly. "There's no rush to narrow my focus. I've got all the time in the world."
"Not really, though. You have to get serious sometime. Heck," I said, only half-joking, "you've only got fifty or sixty years left." His smile changed into something more quizzical and serious.
"What a depressing outlook on life," he commented. "I don't really see it that way at all. Is that how you plan your life? Make your decisions? 'I'm going to die soon'?" His gaze is so intense that I shift in my seat.
"No, I guess not. Sorry, Michael." I grinned ruefully. "I'll ease up on the doom and gloom for a while."
He squeezed my hand lightly and said, "I think you are the most mixed-up girl I've ever known, Claire."
"Mixed up? Gee, thanks, that's exactly what I was hoping you'd say." I nudged him. "What's that supposed to mean anyway?"
"I just mean…you…" His brow wrinkled as he searched for the right words. He looked so adorable and fretful that my breath caught for just a moment. "You're so beautiful, but you're also full of light and laughter…and I sound unnecessarily effusive right now." He laughed at himself before continuing, "But still. You sometimes get so serious, and…you're just really special, Claire." His eyes were dark and serious, intent on my face.
My throat was dry; I had to swallow hard before I could speak. "Yeah, I guess maybe I am." I felt horribly guilty. Here was Michael telling me how special I was, when he didn't even really know. I was lying to him, and he thought I was the most honest, mixed-up, special girl in the world.
He leaned forward then and kissed me. I took the opportunity to blink away a few tears before I melted against him. His approach was always a mixture of confidence and surprise, like he couldn't believe himself. There was something else, too: a sense of restrained power, strength. He was always in control.
We pulled apart, remembering where we were, and I thought I saw him blush slightly. "Um, this is going to sound really stupid. But we are…dating, right?"
"Yeah," I said, a smile growing on my face, "I'd say we are."
"Oh good."
A rush of good feeling overcame me, and I was suddenly intensely grateful that I had met Michael and gotten to know him, grateful to know that I could, after all, handle having a boyfriend. A boyfriend who thought I was special, even when he didn't know that I was Miss Miracle-Gro. Maybe someday I could think about mentioning that to him. After all, Gretchen had taken it pretty well.
"Hello?" Michael's voice brought me back to the present and out of my daydreams. "Come back, Claire." I shook my head and looked up at him.
"Is everything okay?" he asked with a smile.
"Yeah, of course. I was just thinking about everything you said. You're pretty special too, you know." His grin got even wider as he kissed my cheek.
"I'm glad you think so."
A/N: Please remember to leave comments, as those are the only way we know you like/dislike what we are writing.
--Mel and Chuck
