Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or settings. They belong to Andrew Hussie.

AN: OHMYGOG. SHORT CHAPTER IS SHORT. AND CRAPPY. SDHJKSHDS Anyways, did you guys know that Pesterchum actually exists? Well it does! I just found out today! /suchanoob My chumhandle is astralBeings. Feel free to pester/add me! You can even ask me questions about my fanfics and stuff! I'm always looking forward to making new friends. :3

Guest: Woo! :D

ILoveJohnKat: I will, don't worry. :3

TheFanficReader: ...I wouldn't believe me if I were you. I don't even believe me. :c And to be honest, I'm not actually gay. I'm pansexual. And lmao! RAINBOWS!~ Strep-Throat is like... When your throat hurts really bad... and stuff. You lucky nooksniffer! D:


John stepped out of his room, fully changed and groomed, around 10:06 AM, with a huge grin on his face.

He couldn't shake that fluttery sensation in his stomach.

It wasn't bad, but yet…

it wasn't good?

Or was it?

He was getting confused again.

He sighed and took off towards the kitchen, or mess hall as some of the trolls had called it.

Surprisingly, no one else was in the hallways.

This made him wonder, where was everyone?

As he stepped inside the mess hall, he was greeted by the many accusing eyes of his friends.

He stopped dead in his tracks.

Everyone was silent until… Jade squealed.

"OH MY GOD JOHN! IT'S TRUE, RIGHT? YOU AND KARKITTY ARE MATESPRITS NOW?"

If this was like a Japanese anime, John was pretty sure he'd be sweat dropping about now.

He didn't even have to respond, for Karkat had mysteriously appeared behind him and yelled, "WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE? WHY ARE WE ALL IN THE MESS HALL? ISN'T BREAKFAST OVER?"

Dave was the one to respond.

He slowly stood up, and cleared his throat.

"We are gathered here today to partake in the festivities of Egderp and Karkle's matespritship. Let us have a moment of silence for the newlyweds and let them react to our knowingness."

Both John and Karkat were blushing hard.

"U-Uh…" the raven-haired teen stammered as he rubbed the bad of his neck sheepishly.

Karkat let out a low growl and said, "How the fuck did you guys find out? We haven't fucking talked to anyone today -besides now- and we just fucking became Matesprits like not even a fucking hour ago."

Dave smirked, "That's a lot of fucks, Karkles. Shouldn't you be saving them for John?"

John's blush became an even deeper shade of red.

"But…" The blonde drawled, "To answer your question, Jade walked in John's room earlier to go wake him up, but you two were too busy sucking faces to notice her."

John looked over at Jade and saw that she too, was now blushing.

Gog, what was this?

A fucking blush-fest?

"Shut the fuck up, Strider," the troll replied, before grabbing John's hand and leading him towards the table where breakfast was served.

Dave was about to say something ironic, but was shushed by Rose.

"So," the Seer of Light began, "Now that we're all here, we must discuss the problem which is un-doubtfully Jack Noir. As you all know, Jack was defeated three years ago, by none other than John."

John felt all eyes turn on him once again and tried to hide by slouching in his chair.

Rose continued, "But for some reason unbeknownst to us, he has returned and is now looking for revenge. What do you all suppose we do?"

The tension in the room was thick – John supposed it could be cut with a butter knife.

"I do," came a soft lispy voice that the raven-haired teen immediately recognized as Sollux.

"Why don't we send out teamth to thearch for wherever that bathtard ith hiding? Onthe we find him, we can end hith life for good."

Someone in the back of the room sneered and said, "Jeez Sollux. I know you're still pissed about Aradia, but killing everybody isn't going to work. It isn't going to be easy to kill him – you of all trolls should know that! You were one of the first of us to die!"

Sollux glared at the owner of the voice, "Fuck you Vrithka. You think I don't know that? You need to learn to keep your thupid mouth thut. No one wantth to hear your gog forthaken voithe."

Vriska snarled, "Is that the wind I hear? Oh… Right. That's just the sound of your gogdamn lisp."

John, who was getting fed up with all of this, quickly called upon his God Tier powers and changed the direction of the wind so that it was blowing towards Vriska, making her back up a few steps.

Vriska turned her attention on him and bared her teeth, "And what seems to be the matter with our little hero?" She asked, not trying to hide her anger in her voice.

"You need to stop picking on Sollux, Vriska," The Heir of Breath began, "Do onto others what you want done to you."

Vriska let a sickening grin grace her face and began, "Oh really then, Windy. So I can-"

John sent a powerful gust of wind at her, sending her flying back into the wall – déjà vu.

"Rose? Can be please continue?" John asked irritated, looking at the blonde girl with hopeful blue eyes.

She sighed and said, "As long as there aren't any more disturbances…"

She gestured towards the giant hole in the wall where Vriska –

Vriska wasn't there.

Where did she go?

Ah, who cares.

Rose continued, "We will do as Sollux suggested and send groups to search for His Royal Pain."


~Leave a review and tell me what you think of it.
More reviews equals shorter waits for chapters to be uploaded.~