Another background chapter! Right now, I am developing Itachi's character... You'll see what happens in the end.

Metamorphosis

Chapter IX

War


"Mankind must put an end to war before war puts an end to mankind." - John F. Kennedy.


Some thing were made out to be more glamorous than what they really were.

Itachi knew that when he assigned himself to becoming a soldier and fighting for his country - he knew that it'd be a hard job. He knew it'd be no walk in the park. He knew to expect hardships, knew that he'd probably experience terror, agony and depression in ways that he'd never had a chance to experience before. He'd known that.

But knowing it wasn't enough to prepare himself for the journey that lay ahead. It was one thing to plunge into something with vague expectations and theories of what was going to happen - and it was another to see what actually happened. Because, no matter what he did to prepare himself, he knew it'd never have been enough.

And it wasn't like he went blinded, either. They had two months of training camp in order to prepare themselves for the battlefields - the basics, like how to use a knife, a rifle, what to do in different situations: whether you'd be the one shooting with a machine gun or flying the plane or even operating a tank. They also had you try out different strategic games to see who'd be the best and maybe keep in mind who'd end up rising to be a general.

And of course, that was what Itachi had ended up being placed as: a general. To start of with, that is. He had beat more people in chess than he probably should have - which landed him in such a role that he ended up being responsible for the lives of others. And that, was probably what was the most horrible of all.

Every time he made even the smallest of mistakes, it wasn't him that bared the consequences - it was his subordinates or his men. They'd die in his place, and it made him think - was he really worth it? Wouldn't it have been better for him to die in their place? Would their plan have been better; would it have succeeded, won, saved more lives? Thoughts like those were a daily occurrence - and often he'd think that he'd have wished to be a footman: one with the least amount of responsibility, one where if he died, that's it he was dead, and no one else would die because of it.

Because now he had to responsibility to live, too, because if he died, others would die along with him - because they wouldn't know what to do.

So now dying was no longer an option. Suicide was no longer an option - an option that other men could have easily chosen, in order to escape the horror that lay bare in front of their eyes.

And what exactly was that horror?

A field of charred remains. Bombs, dead bodies. People retching blood, dying with unfulfilled dreams - an ongoing battle, where losing meant death. Where death meant loss - game over. Where countless of men experienced game over - they'd never get to see their wives again, never get to see families nor siblings nor lovers. It made Itachi wonder what 'winning' exactly was.

When his plans were successful, did winning mean that he'd get to go to his home intact and happy that he would be able to see his family again? Happy that he had taken away from someone else their lives, their dreams, their very beings?

Because the opposition were people, too. People with homes and hopes and dreams and sometimes even children - people that didn't want to fight either. But they had to, because it was their leader that was telling them to fight.

At least, that was what was often the case. But sometimes it was different - sometimes, people went mad from the horrible things they had to experience daily. The deaths and killings that became mundane as time passed. So mad, that they began to enjoy the pattern of taking away life from others.

A need. A way to take out stress. Something that could be as casual as alcohol, or smoking a cigarette.

And then Itachi had experienced fear. Would he become like that, too? Would he also lose his mind and become an emotionless killing machine, enjoying watching the fear of others as they experiences their last split-second of life? Would he become a sadist, one that would have been thrown in jail had they not been in times of war?

Sometimes, he thinks that serial killers would fit in very well here. They'd be killing with a permit, that's what they would be doing - lawful murdering. One where the whole government approved. Would have been their paradise.

But then, another thing was that he couldn't stop fighting either, even though it was horrible and evil and destructive. He couldn't because if he did, if others did too - he'd be allowing the opposition to be marching there soldiers into the streets of Konoha and destroying children and women and buildings and babies - and he couldn't allow that. Because even though they'd be unwilling, they'd do that, they'd listen to authorities: because they'd be too scared that if they opposed, their own police would blow their heads off.

And maybe they'd be pleased that they'd won. Be drunk off their success - it was something that happened with everyday things, so Itachi didn't have a doubt on his mind that it'd happen with something on such a national scale, too. Because they'd be feeling they were doing a good thing for their country, the right thing - and that was the trap. The road to hell is littered with good intentions.

But one thing was for certain: he'd never let Sasuke see that. He'd never let Sasuke see this, either - the war would be finished before Sasuke would be allowed to join. It had to be, or otherwise they'd all end up blowing each other up. There would be no way to have another war, because, there was no one left to fight - and Itachi didn't want that to happen. He wanted Sasuke to survive at all costs, even if he didn't.

But maybe he too learned something from all of this. To cherish. If he got back alive after everything ended, he'd be sure to cherish his family more than anything - because they were important. It made him melancholic that it took him a war and countless casualties in order for him to realise this fact.

Okay. That last bit is very important - we now see the transition of priorities in Itachi's brain. It's not very obvious, but family suddenly becomes a lot more important, as they are the only ones he can think of and about as such tragic events are taking place.

Reviews? Aurora.